Starry night on the prairie

I don’t think I got more than one hour of sleep last night. I would lay in bed for an hour or two, get up and read, go back to bed, rinse and repeat all night. I am one tired puppy today.

Met Jason and Michelle for lunch. Always a good day when I get to spend time with some of my kids.

A lady from Lawrence called while I was eating. I should have had her call back as it turned into a long conversation. I didn’t catch her name or who she was with. She had gotten a tip that the Chase County Detention Center was busing a load of Detainees to the Wichita Airport so they could be deported. She wanted me to go to the Center and get pictures of the vehicle transporting them;

I told her the Center has a transportation team that transports Detainees to Wichita and KCMO daily, sometimes several times a day and this was not a note worthy event.

We talked a bit and I told her about Love in Action and the things we do. I told her we were partners with the Center, not an enemy. She was amazed at all the things they have allowed us to do.

Still not sure what she is doing or why she thought that was an event that needed recorded. She tried to talk me into calling one of my team and having them go to the Center to take pictures of the vehicle’s license plate. I told her I didn’t have that type of team.

At the end, she asked me if she could keep my number and call me again. Not sure who gave her my number and why she would call again but sure, you have it. I can’t make it go away. Weird conversation.

Went to the Friends of the Library Book Sale and worked as a volunteer from 1:00 -3:00. We weren’t very busy. I sat at the cashier table for an hour and then traded places with someone and worked the floor for an hour. Since I got to work the floor, I was able to shop while I worked and found a bag of books to bring home for $3.

My car tire pressure light came on just before I got to Emporia today. The pressure was high enough I felt comfortable driving home. I stopped at Dieker’s and had them check it. They took the tire off and it was OK. They did tell me I would need new tires soon. When I get back from vacation I will need an oil change and I will order tires then. I appreciate how good of care they take of my car. They didn’t charge me anything for today. Small town service still exists.

Came home and did nothing. I fell asleep in my chair, I would wake up and tell myself to get up and couldn’t find the energy to do so. I finally went to bed but of course once I laid down, I couldn’t sleep.

I will go to bed early and hopefully sleep the clock around and catch up on my sleep.

Tomorrow I have to go to the bank and deposit a nice donation check I got today and get some quarters for the laundry days. I also have the ribbon cutting ceremony for the piece of exercise equipment to go to at 6:00. Not sure who all is coming to that. Hoping to get some pictures to post for my donors to see.

I also need to make lunch reservations for Thursday. All the people that are coming for the first laundry day are going to have lunch before we get to work at the Grand. It will be nice to have some gentle conversation before we get busy.

Thursday and Friday are both laundry days starting at 2:00. We will attempt to get the socks and underwear all washed up. Have one more laundry day next week to finish things up. I have been washing sweat shirts and almost have two totes of them washed. One advantage of not sleeping is I can get a lot of laundry done. Still have two more totes that need done.

Found one of my high school classmates had a heart attack and died Saturday. Ginny was one of the students in my class that started first grade with me. I had lost track of her over the years. If I can make it happen, I will plan on going to her memorial service. Her brother who posted the notice today, said plans haven’t been confirmed yet. If they wait a bit, I may be out of town on vacation. Hopefully I will get to go. We shall see what happens.

Guess as one gets older you start to out live your classmates. I remember my mother and aunts talking about losing classmates every year. Sign of old age I guess! We only had 30 in our class, 20 of which we started first grade with. I think we have lost at least 7 or 8 of them by now.

Another reminder not one of us knows how many days we have left. I need to fully live each day as if it may be my last one. Leave no stones unturned, as they say. I really need to find someone that would be willing to carry on Love in Action if something should happen to me. I really would like to see it carry on if I had to stop leading it.

Got our updated agenda for the trip. It doesn’t sound too bad. We will spend three nights on one cruise ship and then bus to another one and spend three nights on a different cruise ship. Much better than changing hotels every night. We have some sightseeing and a couple nights before we get on the first ship and I think we will be spending two nights in one hotel and then one night in another one. I haven’t studied the agenda much as I have trouble retaining that type of information. I don’t need to know until I do.

Still haven’t spent too much time thinking about the trip. I have some things I need to get organized before I leave. We will finish up the Go Bag project a week from tomorrow. That will leave me five full days to get myself organized so I can get away. Nothing like leaving things till the last minute.

My brain has been operating on about 50% capacity today after my night of little to no sleep. I knew better than to try to do anything when I got home today. It has been a quiet afternoon and evening of resting and being quiet.

Grateful for time with Jason and Michelle, grateful for a sack of books for my winter time reading for only $3, and grateful for a local gas station that takes good care of my car and me!

The first work day for the Go Bags is complete. It is amazing how fast eight women can get things done when they get busy. We managed to get all the underwear, socks, bras, t-shirts, sweat shirts, and back packs sorted and tags cut off. We filled five trash bags with packing plastic and tags.

It took us a little over two hours to get it all done. We did take a short break but worked hard for two hours. I can’t imagine how long it would have taken me if I had tried to do it all by myself.

Next up for the Go Bags is the first laundry day Thursday. We will get the socks washed up and maybe some of the underwear. Not sure how much will fit into four regular washers and two big ones. We will take some sweat shirts to use as fillers in the washers as it is not recommended to wash socks only in a load.

Have two totes of socks to wash, two totes of underwear, two totes of T-shirts plus some leggings and lots of sweat shirts. We have three wash days to get it all done. We shall see how much we can get done. I will probably start washing sweat shirts as we have over 100 to wash and we won’t get all them done. I am more concerned about getting the smaller items washed and folded.

Not sure I want to be the one that matches all the socks but they are at least sorted by sizes so that will help. We will launder things by size so we don’t have to read the tiny tags to know what size we are working with.

I am one tired puppy tonight. I did a lot of lifting of totes today and moving things around. I kept busy keeping the seven helpers busy and keeping the trash bags moved when they were full.

Two of the people that came I had never met before. It is so fun to put a face to a name of the members of Love in Action. I got a chance to visit with one of them but then it got busy and I didn’t get to visit with the other one as much. I trust they all had a bit of fun while they were working.

Tomorrow I am working at the Friends of the Library Book Sale from 1:00 -3:00. I will go early or stay late and get a couple bags of books for me. Depending on what position I work during the sale I might be able to shop while I work. Sometimes I work the cash table and I don’t get to shop if I work there.

Wednesday is the ribbon cutting for the new piece of exercise equipment at the Detention Center. I’m excited to see it in place.

Thursday and Friday are wash days. It will be good to get things washed up and ready to be packed into the Go Bags a week from Wednesday.

Today went about the way I expected it to go. It was hard for me to guesstimate how long it would take. We had a good two hours of work for them to do. Conversation flowed and it felt productive, at least to me.

I need to do my personal laundry tomorrow. I will have to sneak it in between loads of sweat shirts. Wonder what my water bill will be for this month. I did 24 loads washing blankets and another 20 loads washing sweat pants.

Had to open the windows this afternoon to cool the house down. This morning I was running my little space heater. Eight working women warm up a room quickly!

I missed my big country house today. We would have had so much more room to work. We made do today but it was a bit tricky at times. I did get everything cleaned up after everyone left and that went fairly quickly. First time I have really missed the big house in over two years.

May be an early bedtime for me tonight. I am tired. Didn’t feel my best earlier but made it through. Didn’t make it to work out today but got a good workout during the two hours work time. My back is a little sore tonight from lifting all the totes.

So very grateful for the helping hands today. Oh my goodness, it would have taken me a long time to get all that done alone. People are so generous with their time and effort.

Grateful for the helpers today, grateful the tags and packaging is off and the items are ready to be washed, and grateful for mostly a rest day tomorrow and Wednesday.

What a beautiful fall day out today. I could live somewhere where it is like this all the time. Perfect light sweater weather.

Kathy and I went to Hartford this afternoon to go to a Celebration of Life gathering from a guy that we grew up with. He was several years older than we are but his sister was a year older than me and a year younger than Kathy. We attended the same church and did a lot of things as families together.

It was like attending old home week. Several people from our childhood were there. We got to talk to a few of them and then we came home. We didn’t stay long but it was nice to see those that we were able to see.

We stopped at Walmart on the way home so I could get a few things for tomorrow. Came home after that to watch the Chiefs football game.

Had trouble finding the right channel. Man, it is not easy these days to find what you want to watch. We finally found it and then something happened to my TV and it paused. Could not figure out how to unpause it and I gave up and turned the damn thing off. I don’t watch TV much and find it more and more confusing to find what I want to watch. Not worth it! Damn, I am getting old and cranky.

Kathy has it on so she keeps me updated. I am a very casual football fan and even when it is on I really don’t watch it closely.

Tomorrow is the first work day for the Go Bags. I went out to the shed and brought in a table. I am going to set up two work tables tomorrow and hope for the best. I think there are six people coming plus Kathy and I. We have lots of things to cut tags off of and take out of plastic bags. Have no idea how long it will take – guess it will take as long as it does.

Haven’t gotten the house cleaned yet but it is hard to clean with all the totes sitting around. I will wipe down the bathrooms in the morning and call it good.

Tuesday I am working a short shift at the book sale. I will go to town a bit early so I can buy a bag or two of books. Wednesday is the ribbon cutting ceremony for the new piece of exercise equipment at the Detention Center. Thursday and Friday and two more work days. Geez, it will be a busy week.

Got an email from the original company I ordered no strings Hoodies from. The last email from them told me my items were out of stock and they didn’t know when they would be back in stock. They said they would cancel the order on the date that I was to receive them which is mid November. The email I got today said they shipped 10 of the 100 items I had ordered. Geez, now what? Will they cancel the other 90 when I receive these? It will all resolve sooner or later but am sure grateful I found another company to deal with and won’t have to deal with this company after this all gets cleared up.

The sweat pants and hoodies/sweat shirts have taken more of my time and energy than anything else in the Go Bag. Not sure why that was the case. Grateful I found a reliable supplier and can reorder what I need and it will arrive within less than a week and at a cost I can afford.

Glad it is time to get started on the Go Bags. It feels like I have been consumed with this process for months. It really hasn’t been but it feels that way. It will be fun to meet all the people that are coming that I have never met. And it will be nice to see some friends that are coming that I haven’t seen for a long time.

Grateful for childhood memories and friends, grateful the work days are here, and grateful for a calendar to keep me where I need to be this week.

I went to El Dorado this morning to pick up a collection of socks a group had done for the Go Bags. The meeting was in a very warm, meeting room.

I got there and went in at 10:30. There were a handful of people there that were busy getting themselves organized for the meeting. I stood around for a few minutes without anyone saying anything to me.

I finally went up to the man that appeared to be in charge. I introduced myself to him. He gave me an agenda and told me at what point he would call on me.

I finally found a chair and sat down as more and more people came in. No one said a word to me.

The meeting started around 11:00. It was a typical business meeting with lots of side conversations happening. Interesting to watch. When it got to the point on the agenda where I was to be introduced they said something and then I stood and gave a brief presentation about Love in Action and thanked them for their donation of socks.

The meeting went on for a bit until the pizza arrived. They took a break for the pizza. Several people gave me cash to add to the cash they had given me with the socks and thanked me for what I am doing. One lady came over and gave me her contact information. I am to call her when I have something for her to do. She doesn’t do Facebook as she doesn’t trust it. I gave her the website address but she wasn’t sure she could find it.

They came back after break and finished up the meeting. Two different women came up and introduced themselves to me. Both are members of Love in Action. One in particular seemed glad to meet me. It is always fun to get to meet personally the supporters of Love in Action.

I gathered up the donations and left after taking the picture of the man that was in charge of the group holding a package of socks.

It was a most interesting meeting for me. The people that were there are dedicated people working hard for their cause. Doing what they have been doing for a long time. Most in the crowd were my age or older. There were a few young faces but not many.

At one point one of the people that is running for office asked what to tell people he runs into while going door to door that ask for a ride to the polls. Most got a deer in the head lights look on their face. One finally told him to tell them to call their precinct chair. I wonder if people know who that is. I have no idea who my precinct chair is or what that person does.

He also said he is discovering a whole lot of needs our rural, elderly people have. I wonder what he will do with that information?

I felt most of the meeting like I was on a completely different timeline than most in the room. At one point I looked down at myself to make sure I was still here. I felt invisible.

These are good people, working hard. But what a reminder to myself that the way we have been doing things no longer works! We have got to start doing things differently if we expect different results. How easy it is to overlook the most basic of needs to get people involved like a ride to the voting booth.

Not sure I am finding the right words to describe what I felt and witnessed today. I have never felt so out of place and out of alignment with the people in a room before. And I am on their “side” if you will. Non were rude or mean or purposely ignoring me. They were locked into their “agenda” and I don’t think saw me.

Makes me wonder how often I do that. I get so tied up in doing what I am doing that I miss the obvious and simple ways that I could have built a connection with another human. It was a great lesson for me today.

Maybe it was a timeline difference. Maybe it was a build connection with those within reach lesson. Whatever it was, I felt it to my most inner core. It really had nothing to do with the people that were there and more about the Universe talking to me.

Has anyone ever experienced something like this before? Would love to chat if you have.

I did think today on the way home about how do I reach people that don’t do Facebook. What media reaches people these days? There are fewer and fewer newspapers left and who reads them anyways? Does anyone still listen to the radio? If one isn’t on Facebook how would anyone know about Love in Action and even if one is on Facebook how would I reach them? There is still a part of the population that doesn’t spend time surfing the internet. No wonder we have stopped connecting to each other. We don’t have many common connecting points anymore.

It has been an interesting day on many levels for me. Lots of learning points and things to think about. Love when that happens. Who knows what direction I will course correct after today. Really felt the disconnection of society today and the changes that have to happen on many, many levels to rebuild us into something that works for all.

I did appreciate the socks and the cash I picked up today. We have enough socks to give each Detainee two pairs and still have lots left over for our next round of Go Bags when they are needed. The cash was probably enough to pay for doing the laundry at the laundromat on our three wash days.

My mind has been busy since I got home today. Lots of things for me to digest and think about. When I expect it the least, the Universe fills my soul with questions and opens my eyes to possibilities and change. Wow! It was kinda a mind fuck day.

Grateful for the donations of socks and cash, grateful my eyes were opened in a new way today, and grateful for a beautiful, fall day.

This is my last empty space day for the next ten days. I haven’t had ten days full on my calendar since I can’t remember when. Trust everyone will offer me some grace if it gets bumpy.

I have taken full advantage of an empty space day and kept it empty. I haven’t even gotten dressed. Enjoyed a chair nap! Have done absolutely nothing all day and don’t plan on doing anything the rest of the day.

I am creating a point within to return to briefly during this upcoming busy stretch. Sometimes taking a pause during a busy day and returning to a peace point can help regulate my system and keep me above neutral.

Tomorrow I have to be in El Dorado around 10:30 to pick up a big sock donation. I told the lady that is arranging all this I would stay for their social hour after their meeting in case they wanted to ask questions. This is a group of Democrats that are meeting and am guessing they have a busy agenda since we are in the middle of election season.

Sunday I am going to a Celebration of Life for a family friend from years ago. Monday is the first work day. We will be opening all the packages and cutting off tags so everything is ready for step 2 on laundry days. Tuesday I am working at the Friends of the Library Book Sale. I need a sack of books for myself so will either go a bit early or stay a bit late and get a bag. Wednesday is the ribbon cutting ceremony for the new piece of exercise equipment that Love in Action paid half of at the Detention Center. Thursday and Friday are laundry days. Saturday a group from Newton is coming with a load of donated items. Sunday is another work day as is next Monday. Geez! I did it to myself. Man it will be good to get the Go Bag project wrapped up though for round 1 of assembling the bags on Thursday. Kathy and I have a plan for the totes when all the bags are assembled.

I turned the furnace on when I got up this morning. I have run my little space heater all afternoon. My bones are cold and I am having trouble getting warm today. I probably should have gotten dressed and put heavier clothes on. Too late in the day to do that now. I will enjoy my cold pajama day a bit longer!

I really need to stop and make a packing list for my trip. With these busy days ahead the time will fly by and all of a sudden it will be time to pack and go. I picked up some long underwear at Costco Wednesday so I can dress in layers. It will be a bit colder there than it is here. I don’t like to be cold but I would rather be cold than too hot. I can still function when I am cold but not when I am too hot. Guess I am not going to third world countries and can pick up things if I forget something.

It was nice to see the sun out today, even if it is cold out. It only reached the low 50’s today and it has been windy. It is to get back up in the 70’s in a couple days. Maybe it will stay there for a bit so we can all enjoy fall.

It was good for my soul to take a full day of rest. I would think of something I could do and let that thought go. Somedays I can relax into the empty space and somedays I can’t. Today was one of the rare days where I could enjoy the empty space and give myself permission to sit and be without any expectation of anything. Maybe you can teach an old dog new tricks.

Grateful for a day of rest, grateful for my calendar to help me keep track of where I need to be when, and grateful for a furnace and space heater so I could warm up my bones today.

This has been a day of laundry. I did two loads of my personal items and then have been washing sweat pants for the Go Bags. I have the last load in the washer. I started them last night. I have lost count how many loads I have done. I had over 100 pair to wash.

I went to the Court House this afternoon and voted. I think I was number 31 to vote. No line, no wait, in and out quickly. Connie asked me to tell everyone to come vote!

Last night I got an email from one of my Pen Pals. She was letting me know she was ready for another one if I had one. She also offered to do any spread sheet work if I had some that would be helpful for her to do. She is in a remote place doing a winter job and got assigned a desk job that doesn’t keep her busy.

I sent her my donor list that I comply every month and she is going to do a spread sheet for me so I have an annual total by person. Since I am a 501(c)3 this year, I have to send a letter to all that give $250 or more in January, 2027. This will make it easy for me to know who did what. Wow! What an angel. Helping me with a problem before I could even ask. Love when the universe works that way.

The Detention Center is going to host a ribbon cutting ceremony for the new piece of exercise equipment that has arrived and is put together. It is going to be next Wednesday. I need to ask if I can invite some guests to come with me. There are a couple that really helped make that project happen and I would love for them to be part of it. Grateful that project is completed and is in place.

Unloaded a couple more boxes. We filled the back of Kathy’s car up with cardboard that she will take to be recycled next time she goes to the gym. Still have six more boxes in my living room and will have four boxes of sweat shirts soon. I still have ten totes left but I need to save some for the completed Go Bags. Hoping I can consolidate some of the supplies into less totes and have room for the Go Bags to be put in totes. Not sure how many Go Bags will fit in a tote.

Working with a place for storage. They can’t give approval just yet for me to use their space. I will continue to work with them and see if we can come to an agreement of some sort. Guess I will learn to live with totes in every corner of the house for a bit.

If the weather warms up a bit, Kathy and I are going to clean out the storage shed and see how many totes we can put in there. The only thing that can’t go out there is the toiletry kits and the completed Go Bags as they will have a toiletry kit in them. The rest of the things can go out there. That will free up my floors.

Am still working on the schedule of things each work day will be doing. Have lots of volunteers coming and I want them to feel like their time was well spent. I hate volunteering and feeling like I wasted my time. Trying to come up with some extra projects that need done while I have lots of hands to do them. I think I will ask some to write some thank you notes out. Then when a donation comes in, all I have to do is sign it and put it in an envelope and mail it. That would save me a lot of time throughout a month.

No plans for tomorrow. Saturday I have to go to El Dorado to pick up a big sock donation. Sunday I am going to a Celebration of Life event in Hartford. Monday is our first work day. We will be opening and sorting all the clothing items.

Hoping that voting will slow down the unwanted texts and calls I have been getting to remind me to vote. Some guy called last night and tried to talk me into volunteering to phone bank. I told him I had my hands full right now with the Go Bags project. He pushed a bit and I hung up on him. Everyone gets to find their own path. I don’t appreciate people assigning me a path to walk.

Lately I have felt a great resistance to any request that people ask of me that feels like a demand. I get an immediate yuck feeling when I hear someone demand something from me. Not sure what turns a request into a demand but I can feel the difference. Weird, I know but demands are not sitting well in my soul right now.

Grateful the sweat pants laundry is done, grateful for the privilege to vote, and grateful for an angel that helped with a solution to a problem I hadn’t thought about yet.

We lucked out with the weather last night. The heavy stuff went around us. We ended up with some rain but not the big amounts that others around us got. It has been a misty, cloudy, wet day.

I left for KC at 9:00 this morning. Had a quick and smooth trip up. Went to Nicole’s house and gave her my passport so she could check me in with the tour group. She kept my passport so she can pre-check us in for departure flights the 3rd.

I met a lady at Costco that had a box of donations for Love in Action. We made the transfer of the box from her car to mine. I then parked my car and went in to get some things. Parking was at a premium for some reason today and I had to park in the south 40.

Got the few things I needed and a few more things I didn’t know I needed. The lines were long at the check-out but they moved quickly.

Went to Chipotle for lunch and then came home. Traffic was heavier coming home. I had to check a couple times to make sure it was Wednesday and not Friday. Not sure why there was so much traffic at Costco and on the road home. I was lucky that I didn’t run into heavy rain on my trip either way. This morning on the way up it was misting but never had more than that all day.

Kathy helped me get my car unloaded when I got home. I took a short chair nap. I turned my little heater on and found a blanket. My body is not used to it being low 60’s during the day. My bones were cold!

Am working on getting the sweat pants washed up. The sweat shirts will be here early next week and we can use those to put in with the socks and underwear to balance out the loads. I am a bit concerned that the medium sized sweat pants are too small. I just opened another box of them and these are bigger size Medium than the first box. I will use the smaller ones for the women and the bigger ones for the men. I haven’t looked at a pair of men’s medium sweat pants in a long time but compared to the XL they are tiny. Oh well, they are what they are and they will have to do. It will be almost impossible to fit each recipient perfectly.

My class for tomorrow night was canceled which didn’t hurt my feelings. I now have a free day tomorrow. Yay! I need to take a check up to the Detention Center and pay for the 170 phone cards that will be given to the Detainees for their Christmas present. I also need to go advance vote.

In the midst of a tough boundary lesson from someone I got to know a while ago. What they are asking for is impossible for me to provide and their story is becoming a bit hard to believe. I had crossed some boundaries with them some time ago and now know why I need boundaries in place. Some lessons are hard for me to understand until I have a painful life lesson. Think I got this one now! At least this time!

I need to spend some time tomorrow finding my living room. My couch is covered with what I bought at Costco today plus the contents of the box of goods that was donated. I am almost out of floor space from all the boxes that are in it. I’m grateful that we start the assembly process of the Go Bags next Monday as I am running out of bandwidth to cope with the clutter in my house.

The good news is I don’t need to clean my living room as I can’t find the floor to do so! Wonder what things look like behind the boxes that have been sitting in here for a couple of weeks? Don’t look, don’t care, don’t tell is my new motto.

Got an email from the company I had ordered the Hoodies from. The refund goes into a “wallet” they hold until I use it for other merchandise. Although I can request a full refund once my order is cancelled which it has not been yet. I will request a refund and am not going to reorder them in a different color. Their customer service has been impossible to reach. The lady that was to have called me today to resolve this situation cancelled the call without an explanation. I don’t want to do business with this company any more even though their prices are very low. I guess you get what you pay for and I am backing away. Betting it takes a couple months to get my refund.

Sitting with my feelings about the state of the world tonight. Two situations popped up for me today that drove home the real ramifications of what our immigration policy is doing to real people. I need to allow myself some time to allow my anger to be heard and then find a way to let it soften me so I can continue to do what I can to help those in need. Damn, it doesn’t feel like enough some days!

Grateful for a safe trip to KC, grateful to get to see Nicole and Geoff for a hot minute today, and grateful I know how to feel deeply and then let it soften me.

Woke up at 4:00 and couldn’t go back to sleep. Got up and did a few things. Went back to bed around 6:30 and managed to find some more sleep. Sure wish I could fit it all into one sleep, instead of two. I am grateful though, that I managed to get a second sleep.

Have just about given up on the company I ordered the hoodies from. They sent me an email and wanted me to approve a substitution but the link to approve it didn’t work. I tried to call them yesterday but no luck. Today I tried again and left a message. Found out the link only works for 12 hours. Say what? They are to put my money in my wallet. Not sure what that means. If I can get a full refund I will take it and give up on them. If it is sitting somewhere that it has to be used for different merchandise I will order the replacements and see what happens. Learned my lesson about dealing with a company like this.

On the other hand the company I got the sweat pants from turned out to be a great company to work with. The pants are excellent quality and came quickly. I ordered sweat shirts from them today in case I can’t get the hoodie order to go through. I went to the bank and sent them the funds.

They did inform me that shipping rates have almost doubled due to the diesel fuel costs. The sweat shirts are still less than $8 each. I can’t beat that price elsewhere. This way I know I will have what I need to fill the first 100 backpacks. If I get the hoodies, they won’t be here till the middle of November. I will use them for the next Go Bag round.

I know I have some hoodies and sweat shirts coming from a group in Newton that is doing a collection for us. Not sure how many they will bring. We will use them all, eventually.

Trying to decide if I should start washing up sweat pants. We won’t have time to do them all with the limited number of washers and dryers. Maybe one of the wash days we can go to Emporia and a larger laundromat and get them all done at once. I am running short on cash and it would be cheaper to do them at home but it will take a bit of time. Decisions, decisions. I will sit with it for a bit and then decide what to do.

It got up to the mid 90’s today. Yikes! There is a cold front coming in tonight that will bring a chance for severe weather with it. I welcome the cooler temperatures and trust they will chase away the heat of the summer.

I went to Emporia this afternoon. Kathy had gone in this morning to pick up a prescription for her and for me. But Walmart didn’t have the one for her she wanted and she forgot to get mine. I went this afternoon and got the one Kathy really needed and mine. Picked up a couple other things I needed and came home. Wasn’t in the mood to do much shopping.

Tomorrow I am going to Nicole’s at 11:00 so she can do something with my passport for our trip. I am meeting someone to collect some donations at 11:45. I will go to Costco and pick up a few things, have lunch and then come home. Tomorrow late afternoon someone is to call me about the hoodies so I can get that sorted out.

Thursday I have a social media class to go to in the late afternoon. Saturday I go to El Dorado to pick up a sock donation. They have over 100 pairs of socks for me. That will supply our next round of Go Bags. Yay!

Still need to write up the information that will be put on the website for the Go Bags. I need to get it to my website guy before I leave so it will be up and going before the first of December. I am trying to limit how much I write but keep thinking of things I need to put on it. Not all Detainees are eligible – if they came in via the US Marshall Service for some reason they can’t get one – the Us Marshall rules, not mine. And if their family has provided them some goods to take with them, they can’t have a Go Bag. I know this will confuse people but guess it is what it is.

The Center and I still have to work through all the details of me taking a bag to the Center, having them inspecting it, and getting it to the detainee that is going to be deported. Not sure if the Detainee gets to see it before they arrive at their final deportation destination or not. I’m sure the first couple will be weird and then we will find a rhythm and routine to it. It will be interesting to see how many request one.

I have spent lots of Love in Action money this month. Our bank is almost dry. The good news is the November and December treats are funded and the first 100 Go Bags are funded. I have extra stamps on hand so won’t have to spend money for those and we are down to 5 Pen Pals so not many messages are getting sent right now so that program won’t cost anything for a bit. This project has run on trust and faith and I have to trust and faith that when I need funds to fund the second round of Go Bags the funds will appear.

I won’t know how soon to start that fundraising process for a bit. I am concerned that with Christmas, the funds will be dried up for a bit. We shall see. I would love for the mid terms to change policy and the need for Go Bags goes way down. There is a chance we won’t need another 100 Go bags for some time if that happens.

I’m excited for the volunteer work days to get here so we can get this project wrapped up. My living room is full of boxes and with the sweat shirts coming will have even more in it. Not sure where I am going to fit the volunteers when they come to work.

Grateful Kathy got her needed medication on the second try, grateful the heat wave may finally be over, and grateful for the collection of donated goods that I get to pick up this week.

Happy birthday Mom! 97 years young today. She always looked younger than she was. Wish I could know what she looks like at 97. I got to talk to her last remaining sister Marylyn today. Almost like a visit with mom!

Had a phone call this morning. A sweet lady who is very familiar with nonprofits and runs a huge nonprofit in KC gave me permission to call her and ask her some questions about Love in Action. She helped me understand the ramifications of applying for grants and the various types of grants. She breaks things down in a way that I can understand them and patiently answers all my questions. What a treat to get to visit with her and I am grateful she is willing to share her time with me.

This afternoon I had a phone doctor’s appointment. We were going to do it via Zoom or the doctor’s office equivalent of Zoom but it wasn’t working. I guess their system had an upgrade this morning and less than half of the calls went through as scheduled. We were able to talk via the phone and that worked. I got a few questions answered and was pleased with the action plan we put together. We will chat again after my vacation the end of November.

The sweat pants I ordered last week came in already. They will be perfect. The medium size looks small to me but the XL look good. The bank had scared me a bit as they were concerned this company was a fraud. Grateful they came through with flying colors.

But the company that I ordered the no string hoodies from sent me an email today and let me know the hoodies are out of stock and don’t know when they will be back in stock. They are to refund my money in a couple of weeks. I don’t like that it is going to take that long to get the money back but it is what it is. I will be grateful when the money comes back.

Now I get to look again for no string hoodies. I have almost decided to just go with sweat shirts instead. The same company that I got the sweat pants from has sweat shirts at a very reasonable price. I may go ahead and order them tomorrow from them. I want to sit on it overnight and then place an order tomorrow.

The sweat pants and hoodies/sweat shirts have been the biggest challenge of the Go Bags for me. If I can find a reputable supplier for both, I think that is the way to go. The pants got here quickly and I can order as few as 96 at a time. Think I will call it good and go with them.

If I knew where the detainees were being deported to, I would add a hat to the Go Bags but some are going to hot weather countries. I have no way of knowing where the detainees are being sent when I drop off the Go Bag. Adding a hat would add to the expense yet again. I will sit with it and see what my intuition guides me to do.

I need to take a check for $1,700 to the Detention Center tomorrow so they can order 170 phone cards for our Christmas gift to the Detainees. It will be good to get those ordered and know the Christmas gift is taken care of. Still need to talk to the Sergeant about the November cheese cake. I will need 17 of them so will need to get them ordered from Costco before I leave on vacation. I still have a bit before I need to take care of that. Sometimes she is a bit slow to get back to me.

Several people have donated the $90 they got from the payout for their prescription plans. That was generous of them as I know their prescription costs for next year will cost them way more than the $90 they got to offset them.

Have several thank you notes to write. I started them this morning while I was waiting on the call with the doctor’s office but didn’t get them finished. Got another donation today to add to my list of notes to write.

Got the plans set for KC Wednesday. I am going to Nicole’s house at 11:00 so she can do whatever she needs to do with my passport. Then I am meeting a lady at Costco at 11:45 to get a box of donations. After I meet with her I will go in Costco and get a few things, stop and have lunch and then come home. It will be a quick trip to KC.

I really need to make a packing list and make sure I have everything I need for the trip. The next two weeks are busy and I won’t have time to think about it then. Best take care of that this week while it is still relatively calm around here.

I have a prescription that needs picked up so will try to remember to get that Wednesday on my way home from KC. I need a few groceries so will make myself go in and get them too while I am in town. That way I can stay home a couple of days. Saturday I have to go to El Dorado to pick up more donations.

I would like to get my house cleaned before the work days begin. My house is so cluttered right now it is hard to clean. Maybe the volunteers won’t notice the dust and dirt with all the boxes. It would be embarrassing though if they move boxes and find dust bunnies.

This heat wave is finally suppose to break this week. I am so ready for fall temperatures. It may rain on Wednesday when I go to KC. Guess I will deal with whatever happens on that short trip.

Formulating plans for Love in Action for when I return from vacation. So many variables going on it is hard to know what direction to go. If the election results are favorable I wonder what that will do to ICE and the number of people being deported? I won’t know until December how fast the Go Bags are going out and I don’t want to resupply until I know we will use them. Do I write for grants not knowing how many Go Bags we will need? I guess if the election results don’t change anything, I will know to go full speed ahead when I come back from vacation.

I talked to my mentor today about my succession plans. There may come a day in the future where I don’t want to do this anymore. She told me about that process and that it can take a year or more to close down a 501(c)3 if I can’t find someone to run it. I have to find a similar nonprofit to give the assets to. Another thing to explore on another day.

Reminder to self to stay in the moment and take things one step at a time. Solutions present themselves when I need them if I slow down and allow them to come in. Staying present keeps me out of monkey brain and keeps things manageable.

Grateful the sweat pants came in today, grateful for the phone call with Aunt Marylyn, and grateful for a mentor that freely gives her time to help me.

11 years ago I walked into Santiago Spain after walking the Camino, I walked approximately 500 miles from Saint Jean Pied de Port France to Santiago. It was a grand adventure for me and I proved to myself I can do hard things. 50 days alone in a foreign country where I don’t speak the language and am not normally a physical person. Sometimes you gotta get out of your comfort zone and live big and take a risk!

This has been a quiet day at home. I did get my laundry washed, dried, folded and put away so can’t say I didn’t do anything today. But, that is about all I did. I would think of things that need done and think, no, not today. Sometimes I can get something done in the evening. We shall see if that is the case today.

Tomorrow I have two phone calls scheduled – one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Have a feeling I will be tired by the end of the second one. I am looking forward to both of them though and will get some new information about Love in Action and about myself.

Wednesday I am planning on going to KC for part of the day. Have some donations to pick up for Love in Action and take my passport to Nicole so she can do something for our trip.

Thursday evening there is a class about social media I would like to go to. Saturday I have to go to El Dorado to pick up a bunch of socks a group has collected for the Go Bags.

My quiet weeks are coming to an end for a bit. The following week we start working on the Go Bags. I have six work days scheduled so will be busy doing those and getting ready for the next one in between work days.

I am looking forward to reclaiming my house floor space. I have had boxes and totes on the floor for the last three weeks. When my house is cluttered, my mind has trouble settling and quieting. It will be good to get them moved and my floor space freed up again.

Have been sitting with my memories of the Camino today. To this day, I still don’t believe I did it. It turned out to be the best adventure I have ever taken. So many life lessons that continue to be explored and understood even today. Wonder how many times I have said to myself “If I can walk the Camino, I can do …..”

It is finally going to cool off later this week. Maybe summer will finally give up and allow fall temperatures to be dominant. Hope we have a long fall and not dip down into winter temperatures too soon.

I attempted to read the news today but it all felt distorted. I had trouble relating to most of it. I also realized today that if there is a blue wave in November and the Democrats can have more of a say in policy, we are still in for a very rocky road due to the war and the high debt. Things cannot change very fast and then there will be an election in two years. People will blame the Democrats for not righting the ship and will vote red again.

Beginning to really understand the limits of our politicians and our system of government. We have got to fix what is really broken or just a shift from one party to the other won’t help anything.

Grateful for a rest day, grateful the laundry is done, and grateful it is almost time to start putting together the Go Bags.

I posted this on my Facebook wall today and want to include it in my blog. I’ll write more later tonight.

October 11, 2015 I completed my 500 mile walk across northern Spain from Saint Jean Pied de Port, France to Santiago, Spain. It was the most amazing challenge I have ever taken part in.

I learned so many life lessons on the trail that I still think of and have become a part of who I am today.

1. I can do hard things. Before the trip I was a confirmed couch potato. Walking 8 – 12 -14- 18 miles a day was unthinkable. Guess what? I did it!
2. One step at a time. When I would think at the beginning of the day I had 18 miles to walk I would get overwhelmed and almost accept defeat. I learned not to focus on the 18 miles but on one step at a time. If you keep putting one foot in front of the other, one step at a time, eventually you walk 18 miles.
3. Spending 50 days in a country where you don’t speak the language by yourself is possible. I learned spoken words are only one way humans communicate. With a little patience and trust, one can figure out how to get their needs met without words.
4. I learned to ask for help. One of the bigger challenges on the trip was finding my room for the night. I had pre booked rooms and was sent a hand drawn map. Some places don’t use addresses like I was familiar with. I learned early on the walk to find an older person and ask for help. It never failed that they would look at my map, take my hand and walk me to my destination, even if it was 20 minutes from where they were. Once we arrived they would kiss me on both cheeks, bow and wish me a Bien Camino and act like I gave them the honor of their lifetime. People are more than willing to help another human out if we only ask.
5. I learned I like spending time with myself. The first quarter of the trip was quiet and it was rare to run into another pilgrim walking. As I got closer to Santiago it was rare to find some space without others. I learned I like the quiet spaces better. I learned I need lots of alone time to process life.
6. I learned how when I anticipated challenges, it was easy for me to make them bigger than they actually are in my head. If I could stay present to what is, things were manageable. My brain does me no favors when it anticipates all that could go wrong and takes me out of being present where all is well.
7. I met some life long friends on the trip. I also met some people for only an hour or two that have stayed with me since. If one is open, the right people appear if one is open to allowing them in. It doesn’t matter if they stay the rest of your life or just for an hour, they can make a difference in your life that will remain with you forever.
8. I learned how to practice self-care. Yes, I used a taxi or a bus for about 45 miles along the way. Somedays that is what I needed to take care of myself due to blisters, heavy rain, heavy traffic, etc. Being flexible with your life plans allows one to continue the journey. Taking care of oneself is more important than the ego talk of having to take every step without assistance.
9. To this day, I still can’t believe I did it. This was so far out of my comfort level and what I thought I could do before I set off.
10. I had the help of many people that were state side during my walk. Many sent healing energy and good vibes of confidence to me. My blogging history started with the Camino and my preparation to walk it and has continued to this day. Sharing my life story with others has opened me in a way that I never dreamed possible.
11. There is a thing called Camino angels that happens. I think the same can be said about life. I believe in angels that show up and help you when you need it most, even before you think to ask for it. I had that happen several times on the Camino and it has continued to happen many, many times since. One has to be open to it though and accept the help.
12. Life can be simple. The Camino taught me how silly having 100 choices of clothing pieces is. On my walk I had four shirts and four pants. Two each for hot weather and two for cold weather. One doesn’t need more than that. Since the Camino I have simplified my wardrobe considerably. It makes decision fatigue less daily for me.
13. I only took a carry on bag for a 60 day trip. I no longer own a full sized suitcase and always go carry on. We have/take many more things through life than we really need. I have embraced the philosophy of traveling light and also embrace that as living light and owning much less than I did before the walk.
14. This walk was the beginning of my international travel desire. I learned I like life experiences that take me out of my comfort level much more than I like material things. I learn more about myself when I push myself out of the box that surrounds me that is comfortable.
15. Take risks. Choose adventure. Choose to live fully all that is out there. Simplify your life. Live fully in the present and know that all is well.

Not a good night for sleep. I don’t think I got more than one hour of sleep all night. Finally gave up around 5:30 and got up. Did some laundry and finally went back to bed around 8:30. Got a phone call around 10:30 that woke me up. Grateful for the two hours I did get at last. Man, it makes for a long night when I can’t sleep.

I went to Pioneer Bluffs for a short bit this afternoon. I listened to Jeff Davidson sing. It was 90 degrees and I got hot so came home. Annie Wilson was up next but I needed to come home and cool off.

They didn’t have a very big crowd while I was there. I hope the crowd built as the day went along. It is disappointing for the volunteers and staff to work that hard and not have many show up.

I had a bierrock from one of the food vendors. She had put big pieces of cabbage down and then added the meat. I didn’t eat all of it as it was huge. I mainly ate the meat part and just a bit of the bread part. I think I like mine better – i chop the cabbage up fine and mix it in with the meat.

Came home and am finishing up washing the last five loads of blankets I had left. With the sweat pants coming in I knew we wouldn’t need the blankets to fill in. Only need to fold the last two loads of them and then all 120 blankets will be washed and ready to go. Debating if we need to fold them differently so they are more compact. If we have time we will do that. If not, we will make do with the way they are folded now.

I need to have Phil come over and clean out my dryer vent. The blankets had lots of fuzz balls. I had to use a moist microfiber cloth after every load that was in the dryer to wipe out and pick up the fuzz balls. I can’t remember ever needing to do that before.

I guess I should wait and see how the sweat pants do. Not sure if they will leave lots of lent behind or not. Have a feeling I will be washing up sweat pants as I don’t think we can get them all washed on our wash days.

Yesterday I wrote that I had a full week after the back backs are done before my trip. I realized this morning that isn’t true. We are filling the backpacks on a Thursday and I leave the following Tuesday. I best get myself organized this next week as it is my last free time before the trip. I think I have something scheduled for everyday starting the 18th. Yikes! Good thing I get to go on vacation and rest.

Cleaned out my office supply drawers last night. Found three almost full packages of staples – that should be more than a life time supply. I need to share one or two with someone. Also got my filing box caught up and cleaned out. Good to have those little projects completed. I have a few more drawers and cabinets I need to clean out. Not sure why I thought to do these last night but am grateful they are done.

I have two phone meetings Monday. I think I am going to go to KC on Wednesday. I have a box of Love in Action goods that someone collected I need to pick up. I also need to take my passport to Nicole so she can do something for the trip with it. While I am there I will stop at Costco and pick up a few things that are on my list.

Ran into a couple today that we follow each other on Facebook but they were not aware of Love in Action. It made me realize I need to figure out a way to reach people that are not on Facebook. How does one do that these days? Newspapers are not read by many these days. I don’t know many that still listen to the radio. How does one spread the word? I will have to sit with this and see if anything comes to me.

Got the 2026 income tax book from AARP in preparation for tax season that will begin in February. Training is the middle to the end of January. I will see how thick I am in Go Bags and if I have the time to do taxes this year. If I need 100 plus bags per month I may not have time. We shall see what happens.

It did feel good to get out and be around people today. I was grateful there wasn’t a big crowd. It was a tad hot though. Guess better 90 than 30 which is another KS possibility in other years. I saw a few people I knew, but not many.

Looking forward to a quiet day at home tomorrow. I need to do some rearranging of boxes. Trying to figure out the work space we will need for the first work day. I move boxes from place to place and struggle to find the space I need. This little house doesn’t have many places to stash things and get them out of the way. If the weather is good, I can use the front porch although it is rather full of empty totes and six totes full of blankets.

Grateful for the beautiful music I heard today, grateful the blankets are all washed up, and grateful for a day of rest tomorrow.

Kathy and I loaded up the dogs and took them for their vaccinations. Both behaved fairly well and tolerated their shots and the car ride. Roxy got some ointment for her red and dripping eyes. I got some flea and tic medication for the two dogs and one cat. It cost almost $400 to get out the door. Yikes!

Haven’t done a darn thing else all day. I fell asleep in my chair for a bit this afternoon. It has been one of those types of days. I decided to let Love in Action rest today and I did the same.

Tomorrow I might go to Pioneer Bluffs for their fall event. It is to be a nice day and I would love to see some people. I need to push myself to get out more and interact with humans. I seem to have become a hermit and don’t get much face-to-face connection with others.

The world energy is so chaotic that it takes all I have just to keep myself grounded and above neutral. It is hard for me to hold my center when I am out and about. Maybe since most of the activity is outside tomorrow it will be a bit easier. The good news is if I find myself sliding down, I can leave at any time.

Monday I have two phone meetings – one in the morning and one in the afternoon. The rest of the week is fairly open and quiet. I will probably be washing up sweat pants for a couple of days if they get here as anticipated Monday. I want to hold some of them to use when we wash up the socks and underwear. I think they will balance the loads better.

This feels a bit like the calm before the storm. After next week I have two very busy weeks with all the work days. Then I only have a week after that until my trip. Best enjoy the quiet while it lasts.

I do need to go to KC one day next week. A lady has some goods for Love in Action for me to pick up and Nicole needs to see my passport so she can do something with it for the trip. I’ll have to check with the two of them and see when it would work for me to come. I always have a running list of things I need from Costco so can make a stop while there and take care of those things.

I can’t believe it was almost 90 out today. Summer is definitely holding on. I read there is a cold front coming in next week with the possibility of a light freeze. The weather patterns are certainly changing. Wonder what the winter will bring?

I saw the announcement that the government is going to show a firing squad execution. They show executions almost daily but those executions are of innocent people being killed by government officials. I do find it interesting that the man they are going to show is a minority. Geez, what a surprise – right?

I keep feeling some weird vibes about what is coming over the next 90 days. I can’t imagine some of it as it all feels so out of control and out of bounds. Trusting that it will result in some people waking up and realizing what is happening. At some level none of it feels “real” anymore.

Grateful for a quiet day, grateful for a chair nap, and grateful for a day of rest.

Broke down and turned the A/C back on last night. It warmed up to the mid 80’s today so grateful the house has been cool this afternoon. Wonder when summer will let go?

Went to Emporia late morning to get a blood draw. My TSH is low at .5. That is the bottom of the range I am to be in. For the first time my T4 was high. I sent a note to my endocrinologist and she is going to have me lower my Tirosint and do 112 daily instead of alternating it with the 125 dose. I appreciate that she gets back to me quickly.

I only have a one month supply of the 112 on hand so ordered three more boxes. I want to make sure I have it for my trip. I ordered it from a lab in Alabama which is where they make it. It is much cheaper that way. They don’t accept insurance so the cost doesn’t go against my deductible. It is $154 for three boxes which will last three months. The local pharmacy was charging me $80 for one box three years ago. Wonder what they would charge now?

Kathy called in a prescription to be filled earlier this week. When I was there yesterday picking up another one for her they told me they had just received it but it wasn’t ready. As I was driving home today I got a text that her script is ready now. We have to go to Emporia tomorrow to take the dogs to the Vet. One of us will run in and get it while we are in town.

I had only ordered 25 women’s toiletry kits and needed 30 so I ordered another case of them. They came in today. The two cases of backpacks that I discovered on sale for half price didn’t arrive yet. I don’t understand how shipments get separated but I am guessing they will show up tomorrow.

I had ordered some rolls of colored duct tape that we will put strips of on the backpacks to make it easier for the staff at the Center to find in their locker. They came in today along with some scissors that I ordered. We will have several people cutting off tags and I wanted to make sure we had plenty of scissors. For some reason my supply was getting low.

The sweat pants are to arrive Monday. I think I am going to have to wash them up myself as we don’t have enough laundry days to get it all done. I may save some to use when we wash socks just to balance out the loads. I read where you aren’t supposed to wash just socks and underwear in one load by themselves. I will have a bit of time after the laundry days to get the sweats washed up but it will be cutting it close. How many pair of sweats can be washed in one load? The things I am learning.

I held back five loads of blankets that need washed so we wouldn’t run out of things to wash on the laundry days. Guess I can go ahead and get those washed up too. I hadn’t found the sweats pants when I made that decision. My master plan keeps changing as facts change.

I might try to add a laundry day to next week to get a start on the sweat pants. I will see if they are individually wrapped or have tags on them. If not, I might add a day and get most of them washed up. The laundry mat in Cottonwood only has four regular sized washers and two double sized ones. I’m thinking maybe five or six pairs of sweats pants per load? That is 40 per wash day.

I still need to go to the laundry mat and find out how you pay to wash a load of laundry. Do they still use quarters – lots and lots of quarters? Good thing the bank is close in case I will need more!

Got some thank you notes written and in the mail today. Have a couple email thank you notes to send and then I will be caught up again. I have written more thank you notes this year than I have ever before. I guess they are a bit old fashioned but if people are going to be generous enough to send funds for Love in Action, they deserve a handwritten thank you note. It bugs me when I send a donation and never hear back or get a form letter of some sort.

I need to find someone to audit my books. Most of the grant applications I have looked at require a copy of the most recent financial audit. Anyone know someone? My records are rather elementary. I’m not sure if I start before we became a 501(c)3 or after. We didn’t have our own back account until after.

Anyone else feeling the weird energy? Man, it is disruptive to me. Kathy and I have both noticed it. Things are getting ready to boil over I have a feeling. The next 90 days are going to get very interesting. I keep reminding myself to stay grounded and keep my focus on love and not worry about the stuff I have absolutely no control over.

Grateful my endocrinologist is easy to reach and responsive to my messages, grateful I listened to my intuition and had my TSH checked, and grateful I can be flexible and change my plans to get things done for the Go Bags.

Neither Kathy nor I found much sleep last night. Something is up with the world energy and we are both feeling it.

I went to Emporia late morning. I needed a haircut and some things from Walmart. I went to Great Clips. Not sure about the cut – it feels weird to me. I will see after I shampoo and brush it. She worked fast — only took about 15 minutes. She didn’t shampoo it first. About half the price of the other place. Maybe I will adjust and get it cut monthly instead of every two months. We shall see how this works out. I am not too picky about my hair. But then again I have had perfect haircuts for so long that maybe I am and just didn’t realize it!

Went to Walmart and picked up a prescription for Kathy. They were a bit backed up. She had another one but they didn’t have it ready. I wasn’t in the mood to go back and stand in their line again after I paid for my groceries.

I finally remembered to buy some curling ribbon that we will put on the Go Bags to designate sizes. Yet another little project to take care of some time in the future.

Got what I needed and came home. I didn’t get all on my list but I got the urgent things. Not a good day for me to be in a store.

My tummy was a bit weird this morning. When I got home I remembered to take one of the pills the gastroenterology doctor had prescribed. Within 15 minutes I was feeling much better. I do need to remember to take them. I can take up to four a day but so far have only needed one. They have to be taken at least one hour after I take other medication and I can’t take any other medication for four hours after I take one. Hard to fit all in that type of schedule.

Got a post made about the phone cards. People have responded and several donations have come in. I will need $1,700 for the phone cards and another $400 for the cheesecake for the November treat. I want to bank enough for the next 100 Go Bags if they are needed quickly. I am hoping by the time I leave on vacation the first part of November the funds will be here and I won’t worry about things while I am gone.

Nicole got a notice today about our cruise that may not be a cruise. The Danube River is very low due to the extreme drought they are having. The tour group is to let us know their alternate plan in another two weeks. So far, it doesn’t sound like the cruise part will happen.

Not sure how they bus us from place to place as we were to have traveled by boat during the night. We will see what the alternative agenda is and then decide what to do. We can get a refund if the cruise doesn’t happen.

Travel is always an adventure and it sounds like this trip may have some additional adventure to it.

Getting a strong intuition that things are going to get very interesting in the US the closer we get to the election. I have a feeling if it looks like the Republicans will lose control of the House and Senate some shenanigans will happen. Not sure it is a good time to be out of the country but maybe it is the perfect time!

These times are certainly bringing out truth and the best and worst of humanity. Those that are remaining silent are as complicit as those on the front lines. I guess it is good that one knows where others stand and can make decisions about relationships one wants to have. But how will we ever build a bridge between? Guess that isn’t my job – my job is to stand in love and allow others to do what they need to do. Love will win but thinking it is going to get much messier before that can happen.

I need to go back to town tomorrow and get a blood draw to check my TSH levels. It has been a bit since I had them checked and I have been on another new medication for a couple of weeks. From what reading I did, this other new medication can cause my TSH levels to get wacky so need to check on them.

Friday I take the dogs to the Vet for their annual check and shots. They usually tolerate them well. Sometimes the wait in the waiting room can be stressful if there are other dogs in there. Trusting we will have an easy trip this time.

No plans for the weekend. I may go to Pioneer Bluffs Saturday afternoon for their fall event. It always sounds like a good idea until it is time to go then I likely will change my mind. I am becoming a real homebody these days.

Got notice that the sweat pants I ordered have shipped. It will take them a few days to get here. May need to schedule more wash days as it will take many loads to wash up 96 pairs of sweats. Trusting that the quality will be acceptable as I haven’t found a second vendor as a backup.

Got two loads of laundry done today and put away. Washed the sheets on my bed but haven’t gotten it made up yet. Best do that soon as I am tired and may want to go to bed early. I disappoint myself when I go to bed and remember I haven’t put the sheets back on the bed. Takes part of the joy out of climbing into a freshly made bed away.

Grateful I remembered to get curling ribbon today, grateful for a hair cut, and grateful the new pills seem to calm my tummy.

I haven’t had too much of a reaction to my vaccines I got yesterday. My arm is a bit sore but not bad. Have been tired and low energy today and not very hungry but no fever or body aches. I will call that a win!

I finally found a vendor for men’s sweat pants. I have spent hours looking and kept coming up short. I finally found one that will make an exception and sell to a nonprofit. The price is less than $8 a pair! I had to go to the bank and wire them the funds. Trusting all will be well and the product will show up in due time and be of acceptable quality. Dang, this one has been hard! It will be a big relief when they show up. I fear I may need some more laundry days when they do though. How many loads will it take to wash 96 pair of sweat pants?

I helped Kathy get the empty cardboard boxes off the front porch and into her car. She took them to recycling this morning. I will have one more big load of cardboard for her to haul off when I get the backpacks and toiletry kits out of the boxes they came in and when the sweat pants come in. I am waiting to take the toiletry kits and backpacks out of the smaller boxes ntil we work with them as they are easier to lift in the smaller boxes than they will be in the big totes.

I took a nap this afternoon. I got two sleeps last night but still felt sleepy today. I was up from 4:00 – 6:30 am this morning. Managed to get two more hours of sleep after that but it never feels the same when it comes in two patches instead of straight through.

With the pants coming in at less than $8 a pair and the hoodies for a little over $4 each, I have the price of a Go Bag under $35 if I have to purchased everything. Somehow that feels a lot cheaper than $50 each which is what I had first guesstimated. Then with all the donated goods that are here and are coming, the price will be even less. I think I have enough I could order the makings of another 100 Go Bags if we go through the first 100 quickly. Not sure what we will do after that but I don’t need to know the answer to that right now. So far, this project has come through with every idea that has come up and we have always had enough funds when they were needed.

A week from Saturday I am going to go to a meeting in El Dorado and pick up a collection of socks. The lady coordinating it said they had a lot of socks. Another group from Newton is doing sweatshirts and leggings – they are shipping them to themselves and are going to wash them up for me before we meet up to hand them off. How sweet is that? Yet another lady is coordinating another drive of some sort, I haven’t heard an update from her.

I am having a phone conversation with a lady that understands all the rules and regulations for nonprofits on Monday. Once I have that conversation and get some of my questions answered, I will be making some changes for the donors. I will also start writing some grant proposals. I need to understand all the ramifications of what a grant does to our fundraising needs and how that changes things. I never anticipated having to raise $35,000 to cover 1,000 Go Bags. When I met with this lady before I ever became a nonprofit, she warned me this would happen.

I had misplaced my debit card sometime earlier this week or the end of last week. When I couldn’t sleep last night I got up and searched my purse and found it. Grateful it wasn’t lost – just misplaced. I was out and about Monday and had to charge the things I bought on my credit card I carry as a backup.

Tomorrow I need to find someone to cut my hair. It is about a week past needing one and I have to stop and get that done. Dang, I miss my guy that has cut my hair for the last ten years or so. Having to go in and trust a stranger and tell them what I want makes me cringe. Oh well, it is just hair. It grows and can be cut differently the next time if I don’t like it.

Friday I take both dogs to the Vet for their vaccines. Roxy was limping yesterday but it seemed better today for the most part. I will talk Kathy into coming with me as managing two big dogs is a handful – especially if there are lots of other dogs in the waiting room.

I need to write up the request form for the Go Bags so my guy can start working on it so it is ready to go the middle of November. The Go Bags can’t go anywhere unless people request them. Not sure how the website works and how I get notified but we will figure that out. Good things others know about these kinds of things.

Feeling relieved that I finally nailed down a supplier for the sweat pants. Finding stringless pants was much more of a challenge than I had expected it to be. I am very pleased with the price and will be a bit anxious until I actually see the product and know that the quality is acceptable. Everything I have ordered so far has been good so I need to let it go and trust!

I tried to watch TV for a bit yesterday and finally turned it off. The election ads are out in full force. Most of them are so full of outright lies and mistruths that they are hard to watch. My inner bullshit detector goes off when I hear a mistruth. Both sides are equally guilty although I think one side is more extreme than the other. My nervous system couldn’t take any more of them and I had to turn them off. Wonder if I can find some movies or something to watch for the next 30 days or so. Can’t take any more of those ads.

Grateful I didn’t have a bad reaction to my shots, grateful for an afternoon nap, and grateful I found a vendor for the sweat pants.

This has not been the easiest of days for me. Feel a bit scattered and ungrounded. I did manage to sleep some last night but still feel tired.

Went to Emporia a little after noon. I had some things I needed from Walmart and I was scheduled to get my flu and Covid vaccines at 2:00. I found what I needed and then headed over to get my shots. They were able to take me a bit early. The lady did a nice job injecting them. Wonder if I will have a reaction this time? I got the Moderna shot this time and in the past I have reacted to those. The Pfizer ones I never react to. I am free all day tomorrow in case I do.

I was going to stop and get a haircut but I needed to come home. Wasn’t feeling it for a haircut today.

I got some inner containers to help sort things in the big totes I am putting the Go Bag supplies in. Two of the new inner containers are short and the rest are tall – not sure how that happened.

Worked on sorting the stuff that goes in the totes a bit. Took the totes with the blankets in them to the front porch. If it gets cold, it won’t hurt the blankets at all. Haven’t figured out where to put the toiletry kits and back packs. Kinda want to keep them in the boxes they came in for a bit longer as they will be heavy if I put them in the totes. I am out of room in this house though.

Made labels for the totes and got most of them on the totes. Now I can find what I need easier. The inner containers work for a couple of the items but not sure they are big enough to hold the different sizes of other items. I am trying to limit how many totes I have but may need to make a tote for Medium T-Shirts and another one for XL T-Shirts.

Not sure why this hasn’t been an easy day. I am limiting what I expect out of myself today as a result. No use pushing when it isn’t needed. Trusting tomorrow will be a better day and I can get more things done.

Stopped at the post office to get the PO Box mail. Got five hundred stamps today and a nice check. People are so generous. 100 of the stamps came in an envelope from someone that didn’t identify themselves. They put my address as the return address. I won’t be able to send them a thank you note.

I need to clear some clutter out of the living room. I brought in some totes and haven’t found a place for them yet. The porch is getting cluttered now too. I need to help Kathy take a bunch of boxes to recycling and clean up part of the porch clutter. Two more weeks before we start putting things together. I can do this, I can do this…..

Still working on reorganizing the back room. Instead of organizing, what I really need to do is get rid of things. Maybe I need to get cranky and start throwing things away. For some reason, it is easier for me to throw things away when I am cranky. I’m not too far from being cranky so maybe I need to step over the line and go for it!

Nothing on the calendar until Friday when I take the dogs for their vaccines. Roxy was limping today. Dang, those critters are eating away at my budget. The older they get, the more they are falling apart – kinda like Kathy and I.

Hard days remind me to be more grateful for the easy ones.

Grateful I got my vaccines today, grateful I am finding ways to get things better organized, and I will be grateful when this day is done.

I found sleep last night and slept in this morning. I would be happy if I could do that every night.

I am working on cleaning up the back room. It feels cluttered to me. I’m sure part of it is because the front room is full of boxes and it is bothering me. The new totes are to be tomorrow and I can clean that up a bit.

Found the tote of clothes that had come in for the released detainees Go Bags. Figured out I can use the pants that came in with inner strings for the released detainees. Whew! That feels good they won’t be wasted. So grateful the mistake was caught when it was so we won’t get lots more of them.

I am in a throw away mood so it is a good time to clean up the back room. I have lived in this house for over two years and if I haven’t used something, I don’t need it. I will continue to go through everything and figure out what I can get rid of. I have lots of paper goods and need to figure out a way to store them better.

I am going to October to a meeting of the Democrats of Butler County to pick up a sock collection. I guess they were very successful and have lots of socks for me and they are expecting more to be brought to the meeting I am going to. I sure appreciate groups that help us out.

Tomorrow I have to go to Emporia for my flu and Covid shots. I need a few groceries so will pick those up while I am there. I have nothing on my calendar for Tuesday in case I have a reaction. I didn’t last year so hoping that will hold for this year too. While I am at Walmart I need to look for something that will work as dividers for the totes. Some of the things like bras will all fit in one tote but I need to divide the two sizes.

I have some rearranging to do when the totes come in tomorrow. I ordered another 16 so should have enough to get everything in its place. Still waiting on hoodies and sweat pants so will need to save some totes for them. How many totes does it take for 100 hoodies? How many for 100 pair of sweat pants? I may need more totes yet!

I have felt a lot of restlessness today. It is one of those days that it has been hard to settle and I have no idea what is behind it. Giving it lots of room and space and stopping occasionally to tune in to see if there is a message of some sort in it. Sometimes there is and sometimes it passes without me knowing what it was.

Grateful I figured out a use for the inner string pants, grateful for all the sleep I got last night, and grateful for all the socks that have been collected.

Finally got sleep after 4:00 am this morning. Slept in a bit but not enough. I am tired this evening.

Took care of some odds and ends at home but it was mainly a do nothing type of day. I did manage to get my laundry done, folded and put away. That is my success of the day.

I went to Matfield Green this afternoon to see an artist that has a studio there. She does my favorite Flint Hills scenes and had some beautiful work. Matfield had several different artists that had open studios today.

My tummy started yelling at me so I came home after the first stop of the artist tour. I am glad I came home as I had to run to the bathroom for about an after I got home. Finally took something to slow things down. They worked but am feeling drained this evening.

A group from Newton is buying a bunch of things for the Go Bags. They are going to ship them to themselves, wash them and then bring them to me. How sweet is that? The generosity of people continues to amaze me daily.

But she discovered that the sweat pants I had placed on the Amazon gift registry has inner strings. I had asked the site if they had draw strings and they said no. What they didn’t say is they have inner strings and those are not allowed either. They don’t have much elastic in them as they depend on the inner strings to be pulled to hold them up.

I took a pair over to a friend of mine that used to do tailoring. We tried to figure out a way to remove the draw strings and put in a piece of elastic and sew it in place. Without knowing the size of the waist of the person that will be receiving the pants she didn’t think that would work. Dang it anyways.

I haven’t opened some of the other packages of them so will figure out a way to return them. Man, this can get frustrating. I trust one of the two vendors I found no strings sweat pants from that deal with institutions will work with me and I can figure out a way to order them from them. I may have to order way bigger quantities than I expected but I have funds if that is necessary – to a point anyways. Project for Monday!

Got a phone call this afternoon that was challenging. It is a family matter. Still sitting with it and trying to find some grace and compassion. The situation she called about is out of my hands and up to a company to decide what they are going to do. I will wait till the company makes a decision and go from there. I will accept whatever decision the company makes. Another frustration of the day though.

I was looking at the bulk order site. I had only ordered 24 women’s toiletry kits and I need 30. I decided to go ahead and get another case ordered. While I was on the site I found some backpacks that will work for the women on sale for half price so I ordered two cases of those too. We will need those sooner or later and might as well get them at that price. I need different colored backpacks anyways and this will help solve part of that problem.

This has been one of those days! I feel bad for making the wrong choice on sweat pants and grateful someone caught it. I guess you can hold two opposite views at the same time! I will figure out the return thing tomorrow and get that process started. Grateful it was discovered before I took them to the Center and attempted to have a go bag pass inspection.

Problems seem to come up and so do solutions, just not always on my time table. Another lesson in that today! Both frustrating situations are not something I can solve today. I will do some energy work and release both of them and let them go!

Starting to feel a bit boxed in due to the extra clutter in my house. I might try to move things around a bit and open some space back up. When my house is cluttered, I struggle to settle and quiet my mind. Surely I can last a couple more weeks though. I have a solution coming for that issue to – again not on my preferred timeline. Thinking there is a lesson from the Universe for me today. Guess I don’t have to like the lesson – just need to learn from it.

No plans for tomorrow. Monday I have to go to Emporia and get my flu and Covid vaccines. I have a few groceries to pick up while I am at Walmart. The rest of the week is empty space so should have time to handle the returns and continue to explore the institutional orders and find solutions for them.

A month today Nicole and I leave for our trip. I think I will pull out the travel itinerary and spend some time reading that. I need something positive to look forward to. Time seems to be flying by so it will be here before I know it. So grateful the Go Bags will be done and ready to start passing out when I get back.

Going to spend some time releasing bad vibes from today. Nothing happened that can’t be overcome. I just need to let go!

Grateful the lady caught my error in the sweat pants today, grateful I listened to my tummy and got home before it went crazy, and grateful I found some backpacks for half price.

Another night of hard to find sleep. I did get some but not enough. I did manage to take a chair nap this morning. The house felt cold so I dug out a heater, found a blanket and curled up on my chair. I managed to find some more sleep. Yay!

I went to Emporia to run errands. I stopped at the bank in Cottonwood Falls to deposit some donations for Love in Action. When I got to Emporia I parked and then dropped some thank you notes at the post office to mail. Walked on down the street to Bobby D’s and met Jason for lunch. We had a nice visit and lunch.

After lunch I went to the public library and sent a two page fax. I found a vendor for men’s sweat pants without draw strings but you have to fill out an application before they will accept you as a client. I may not have a big enough order for them to bother with me. We shall see what happens.

I had to get permission from the Detention Center to have the pants shipped directly to them as the vendor won’t deliver to a home address. The Captain graciously granted permission. Now I wait to hear from the vendor.

I headed to Cottonwood Falls. I stopped and got some ice and then came home. It was good to get those errands done.

Kathy and I brainstormed and I think have come up with a way to make each backpack more easily identifiable for the detention center. I had ordered assorted colors at the Center’s request but was shipped all the same color. I think if we put three strips of colored duct tape on them – two on the front and one on the back, it will make the bags easy to identify from a distance, will not catch on anything like the conveyor inspection belt at the airport, and can be removed easily when the Detainee gets the bag.

I need to call the Captain or the Sheriff and make sure I can put duct tape on the bag. They may have a policy prohibiting it. If they do, I will come up with plan B.

I have spent most of this week figuring out ways to get the cost of the Go Bags as low as possible. If the contract comes through for the sweat pants, I will get the cost of each bag down to $32 for the men and $34 for the women. I had originally projected $50 so am pleased with the “bargains” I have found. I would like to get them to the point where 3 cost $100 and I am almost there.

Right now I have bought in bulk for 100 bags but if I get storage space I can up that and save even more. I don’t have the space for more than 100 at a time right now. Should know soon if the storage space will be available and then I can order the next round of supplies.

Still working on the schedule for the work days. I want to make sure I have enough work for the volunteers to do so the drive to come will feel worth it. I hate when I volunteer somewhere and don’t feel it was a good use of my time. It is hard to predict how fast things can get done. Some people will be lightning speed and others will be turtle speed. All will be welcomed and appreciated. Just want to make sure I can keep them all busy, regardless how fast or slow they are.

Am working on washing up another 30 blankets today. I think I will save the last tote of them in case we need something to do for one the wash days. If the sweat pants come in, I won’t get all of the things washed up on the work days and won’t get to the rest of the blankets. But if they don’t, I might need more wash to do on a work day. Balancing all the in case situations is running through my head all the time. Trust people will offer grace if my plans don’t go as anticipated.

Good news is I have until the first of December to get this all done. I can always schedule more work days if the hoodies and pants come in on time and need washed up.

It is a perfectly beautiful fall day out today. The humidity and rain has finally broke and we have had cool temperatures and sunny skies all day. I’m not sure it reached 70 today. Feels and smells like fall today. My body was cold this morning as it is not used to these cooler temperatures.

Did some more digging about grant information. I need to find out the consequences of accepting grants and fully understand what that does to fund raising responsibilities before I get too far ahead of myself. I know there is some requirement about how much you can accept and then how much you have to raise in smaller donations. I really had never planned to be a permanent fund raiser but if the Go Bags go out as they might, it looks like I will spend more of my time raising funds somehow or another.

It is easy for me to get ahead of myself and step out and not fully investigate all the pros and cons. I am attempting to do my due diligence and not make more work for myself down the line.

Felt good to get some things taken care of today. I have a tendency to procrastinate and not get things done timely. I even managed to call the Vet today and schedule the dog’s vaccinations. I almost feel caught up. Now I need to make myself do some housecleaning or not!

Feeling like I finally climbed above neutral today for the first time in a bit. I’m not quite back in my peaceful valley but it is close. When i can step back and allow myself to take things one step at a time and allow myself grace I will be back in my valley.

Have felt like I had lots of loose ends lately and it does feel good to get some of them tied up. Maybe it will free some mental space for me. I am not as good as juggling lots of little details at the same time as I used to be.

Grateful for lunch with Jason today, grateful I am caught up with my thank you notes, and grateful for the sunshine today.

Rain, rain and more rain. Flood warnings up all around. Think I will stay in where it is dry. I did wimp out and turned the A/C back on. It was so humid and hot in the house without it. Kathy was struggling to breathe and both of us had trouble sleeping last night – I think because of the heat and humidity. I have felt cold this afternoon with the air on. Guess I am hard to please.

Have spent all day washing blankets. I got 120 of them as they came in a box of 24 and I needed 100. I can do 5 at a time in my washer. When I take them out of the dryer I have to use a slightly damp cloth to wipe out the dryer of the lint balls. I think I am about halfway done. Good time I have lots of time before they will be needed. Wonder what my water bill will be this month with 24 extra loads of laundry?

Have spent the rest of the day finding bulk suppliers for the last two big items which are the hoodies and sweat pants. I found one for the hoodies and ordered them. They are coming from China and with the war and fuel situation I pray the items I ordered will arrive. Shipping costs were high but even lots more if I had them come by air. Most of the bulk items I got were made in China and I am satisfied with the quality so took a chance on the hoodies.

I think I finally found a supplier of sweat pants for the men at a price of under $10 a pair. It is from a bulk suppliers that mainly sells to institutions but also will accept a nonprofit. I have to fill out an application to become a customer and if accepted can order sweat pants for about $9.00 a pair including shipping. I will get that filled out and returned to them and see what happens.

If that doesn’t work I found a supplier that only sells to prisons and I can check and see if the Detention Center will order them for me and I reimburse them.

Did some number crunching on the cost of the Go Bags and if Love in Action has to pay for everything in the bag I have the cost down to around $35 a bag. I am exploring grants to write and needed the exact cost of a bag. That cost gets offset with donations of goods.

Found a couple of grants that sound like Love in Action might be a match for them. I need to do some more investigating to understand the ramifications of accepting a grant and what that means to fundraising responsibilities. Since I am a 501(c)3 there are requirements I need to pay attention to. I really didn’t think we would ever get big enough to need grants. However, if the Go Bags go out at the rate of over 100 a month, I think we might need some grants to help offset the cost. My donors are incredibly generous but with the way the economy is, I don’t want them to hurt themselves by giving too much.

I got a very generous check in the mail today from a new donor. She wrote the nicest letter with it. She mentioned she liked how we treat the employees at the Detention Center as well as the Detainees with dignity and respect. Her check funded the hoodie order with funds left over. People are so incredibly generous.

Went to the bank and deposited a check. I need to make another trip and deposit two more that I got today. I will wait till the rain stops though. Went to the post office to check my new PO Box for Love in Action and found two checks waiting for me. That made the trip to the post office fun! I also stopped and dropped off a check for my water bill.

It has been a quiet day at home for the most part. It feels good to have the laundry to do as it feels like I am getting something done. I went down the rabbit hole of sweat pants providers for a long time. Most of the sweat pants are sold with draw strings and I can’t use those or pull the strings out and call it good. I persisted and hope I found a supplier.

When it stops raining I need to help Kathy take two car fulls of cardboard to the recycling bins. I don’t think it will all fit in Kathy’s car alone. I still have nine more boxes in the living room that might have to sit for a bit. I did order some more totes so maybe when those come in I can get rid of the boxes. Not sure where I will put the totes though. Good news is I hope to have a storage place lined up soon and can move things out of the house.

My plan is to only keep the full Go Bags at the house and keep all the bits and pieces at the storage place. The place also has a nice work area for future work days. If we get to use it, we will transfer things to it on our work days. The volunteers will pick up the laundry things here, wash them up and then we will take them to the new storage space. Hoping we can assemble the bags in the new space. That will make it much easier. I will find out the 16th if it is a go.

I haven’t seen it rain for several days in a row for a long time. We got lucky and didn’t get 11 inches like they did in western KS. Most of the time the rain came straight down. This afternoon it is blowing a bit and going a bit sideways. Grateful I don’t have to get out in it.

No plans for tomorrow. I may run down to Matfield Green Saturday. They are having an event I would like to go to. I always think it is a good idea to go until it is time to go and then most of the time I change my mind and stay home. We shall see what happens this time.

Next week is full of empty space. I am getting my Covid and flu shots on Monday. Have lots of time to recover if I have a reaction. Last year I didn’t have one so hoping that will be the case this year too.

This has been a mental busy day for me. Working on the plans for each of the work days in addition to searching for cheap sweat pants. I need a written plan for each of the work days as a starting point. I’m sure after each work day I will adjust the following work days tasks of things to do. It is hard to know how long it will take people to sort 100 pair of T-shirts into sizes and cut off tags. How long will it take to open 75 toiletry bags and remove three things and add several things? We shall see what happens! Good news is I have lots of time until December 1, even with being gone for 16 days of that time.

Grateful for several generous donations today, grateful for the A/C and how quickly it removed the humidity from the house, and grateful I am almost halfway done washing blankets.

Got some sleep last night. I woke up a couple of times but was able to go back to sleep. Still feel like I could use more sleep but that usually happens when I sleep more than normal. Maybe tonight I can sleep again and not wake up feeling tired tomorrow morning.

Had a wonderful Zoom conversation with an immigration attorney. She is going to edit the conversation and then it will be posted to the Love in Action Facebook page. It lasted an hour but worth the time to watch it when it is posted. She showed a book of the immigration law that is 2,500 pages thick and has been added to since. Geez, do you think we could make it more complicated?

I learned a lot during the conversation. One thing I knew but realized even more, is just how complicated immigration law is. Add to that the various interpretations of the law and current policy. We seriously need immigration reform in this country.

The items I ordered in bulk came in today. My tiny house feels a bit crowded. I got some of the things put into totes but I still have 14 boxes of things I am going to leave in boxes for now. The boxes got wet so may change my mind as I don’t like the smell of wet cardboard.

I am impressed with the quality of the items. They were much cheaper than what I can buy anywhere else and I was a bit afraid that the quality would reflect that. I don’t think it does.

I thought I had ordered the backpacks in various colors but got all the same color. The Sheriff had asked me to do various colors so they could find them in the property closet easier. I may have to get some stickers or do something creative to help him find them. I could tie bows on them or something like that to help them out. Anyone have an idea how to make a bag stand out that could then be removed from the bag when it is no longer needed?

Trying to figure out how many of the things we can do in one wash day. I have three wash days scheduled and I know we can’t do all of them in three days. How many washers do you need to wash 150 pair of socks? How many for 150 pair of underwear? Oh the things I am thinking about these days.

I think I can do a sock, underwear and bra day, I might throw in some T-shirts for each load. When I googled it, they recommended not doing just socks as they can escape into the abyss. No wonder my head is full these days! The things I am learning. Then again I have never needed to wash 150 pairs of socks at one time.

Another day would be to do the rest of the T-shirts. They recommend 20 – 25 T-shirts per load if that is all you do. We could match and fold socks while waiting for the T-shirts to wash and dry. Oh my, how much fun will it be to match 150 pairs of socks. What have I gotten myself into?

I still have blankets, leggings, sweat shirts, hoodies and sweat pants to do. Oh my. Thinking I will get the blankets washed up early myself as I know it is going to take lots of loads to do 100 blankets. On one of the wash days, the volunteers could fold blankets while we wait on the washers and dryers.

I found a bulk place I can order 110 hoodies with no strings for a little under $5 each. I don’t think I can beat that price. I’m trying to decide if I can trust the quality. I am feeling a bit better about that after seeing what I got today. Most of the items I got today were from China. They won’t arrive until the first part of November as they will be shipped from China. I will have time when I get home from my trip to get them washed up before we start passing out bags December 1. They will be easy to add to the bags or I could have another couple of work days to help get them washed and added to the bags.

Still haven’t found a cheap place for men’s sweat pants without strings. The cheapest I have found is just under $10 a pair. Someone is doing a collection of them. I will wait and see what they come up with. I may need to act soon though, as shipping can take a long time as I found with the hoodies.

If absolutely necessary, we can give them a bag without pants or a hoodies but I sure would prefer giving them a change of clothes. Good thing I started this early so we can work through these issues.

Need to order some more totes. I have 16 but that isn’t enough to put everything in them. I am thinking 8 more will do but we shall see. Sure wish I knew how fast we would go through the bags so I knew how big to build my supply. My intuition is telling me it will take a couple months for the first 100 and then the next 100 will go quickly. That may be a good thing so we can ease into this project a bit. I have the funds to order the next 100 which covers everything except the hoodies and pants and a few of the little things we are adding.

Trying to think of a place I can hide 14 boxes until our work day. Five of them are blankets so will work on getting those washed up. I have them in my living room right now and I know myself well enough to know they will drive me to drink if I don’t get them moved sooner rather than later. And I don’t drink! And I’m not sure where to move them to.

Got the month-end report posted. Always feels good to get that done. It is way too long but that is how I roll I guess. Lots going on.

I am grateful I have lots of empty space ahead of me. I filled the last two weeks in October with work days. I best give some time to my upcoming trip and decide what I will be wearing and if I need to get somethings for the trip. I leave the first part of November and that will be here before I know it.

Rain, rain, rain. It has rained off and on all day with lots more rain coming. We are in a tornado watch for the evening. So far we haven’t had any wind and the rain has been gentle and mostly light. Good day for a nap – wish I had thought of that sooner. Too late to nap now.

Reality kinda slapped me in the face today with the huge delivery. Things will get all sorted out. I need to remind myself to take one step at a time and it will all come together. So grateful I listened to my intuition and ordered the bulk things when I did so I have time to get them all ready. It would have been hard to schedule lots of work days the end of November and even in December with the holidays coming.

Grateful for my friend that did the Zoom lesson today, grateful the bulk items are here, and grateful I have time to figure things out.

It was not a good night to find sleep last night. Not sure I got even one hour of sleep. I have been in a bit of a daze all day. Just laid down for a bit but didn’t find sleep yet. Maybe later I will crash and sleep around the clock.

I made a post asking for some help with the Go Bags and filling the Halloween Treat bags for the Detainee’s October treat. I already have two to four volunteers for each day. Betting it will all fill up before it gets here.

I gave more thought to the washing day. Discovered the Cottonwood Falls laundromat only has four regular sized washers and two big ones. When you have to wash up 100 t-shirts, 100 pairs of pants, 100 hoodies or sweat shirts, 100 blankets, 100 pair of underwear, 100 pairs of socks, etc. I realized I would need several wash days to get it all done. Still not sure I need to wash everything but this way I will have help folding and sorting if nothing else. I added two more wash days just in case. I may need to wash some things at home too.

I got the first of the 15 boxes that are coming from the bulk supplier. I got the ladies underwear today. They look like they are an acceptable quality. Trusting the remainder of the items will be too.

Had a kind offer today of some work space and storage space. If it all works out this will solve my storage issue. I may have a room where I can leave the supplies all the time in a secure room plus a big area right next to it for work days. I should know in the next week or so if it is a go. If it is, all I will need to store at home is the completed Go Bags. I can go get more as needed and store the next round of supplies at this place. Another answer to a request I sent out to the Universe.

I will need to figure out a way to get all the stuff to that location and I will have to transport boxes of stuff to the new space as they arrive but that can be managed. I have a feeling 100 backpacks are going to take up lots more space than I have.

Found some sugar free treats to order for the Halloween gift bags. It usually costs more for the dozen sugar-free treat bags than it does for the normal ones. Grateful I found what I needed.

Found a supplier of hoodies with no strings for only $3.58 each. Shipping makes them closer to $5.25 each but that is still way cheaper than I can find anywhere else. Sitting on it for a bit before I decide to order them. Shipping time takes a bit so need to make a decision soon if I want them here for our packing the Go Bags work day.

Still need to find a bulk supplier of pants for the men. I found some leggings for the women that are reasonable. For some reason, sweat pants for men are hard to find for under $10 a pair. They can’t have draw strings and that makes them even harder to find. I will keep looking.

Sure wish I had a crystal ball and knew for sure how many Go Bags will be requested. I keep listening to my inner intuition as that is the only thing that I have to go off of right now. So far, it hasn’t led me astray.

I think I have the month-end report ready to go. I got some more donations and had to add the expense of the sugar free treats to it. It always feels like a big project off my plate when I can publish it.

Didn’t feel the best today as I was going on no sleep. Sure wish I could figure out this sleep thing. It kicks my ass occasionally when I have a night of no sleep. It will take me a day or two to recover IF I get sleep tonight.

Didn’t attempt much else today. I did get two loads of laundry washed but haven’t gotten them folded and put away yet. I stayed in today for the safety of all around me. It was a hard day!

Tomorrow I am to have a Zoom call with an immigration attorney. We will talk about the current status of immigration and how the law is being interpreted. When we are done we will post it on the Love in Action Facebook page. I am not sure how that is done but trusting the attorney will know how to do that. There are so many myths and untruths out there about immigrants that I am hoping this will make things a bit clearer about the reality of being an immigrant these days.

No plans for the rest of the week or weekend. There is an event I might go to on Saturday if I can make myself leave the house. We are to get rain for the next two days and lots of it. Rainy days make me want to stay home and curl up and read a book. My inner level of beingness needs some quiet time at home right now.

Grateful for the volunteers that are signing up for the work days, grateful the month-end report is ready to publish, and grateful for the sleep I will get tonight.

I went to Emporia late morning to pick up my CPAP supplies and get some bird seed for Kathy from Walmart. My tummy was a bit upset again this morning so had to time the trip carefully!

I went by the bank in Cottonwood Falls to cash a check and then came home and went to the bathroom. After a bit I headed to town. I stopped at a gas station to use the bathroom. While there the CPAP supply place called to confirm my order. They were pulling the things ahead of time. I appreciated that. They had forgotten one thing but by the time I got to the store to pick them up, they had added it and all I had to do was sign the form and I was done.

Went to Walmart. I got a front row parking spot. That should have been my first clue that something was amiss. I got to the south doors and they were totally blocked off. I had to walk to the north doors to get in.

I needed to use the restroom but decided to wait till I got to the animal feed section and use the back ones (the ones closest to the south doors). When I got back there, the bathrooms were closed and the bird seed was not to be found.

I tracked down an employee and asked them where the bird seed was. It was still up by the garden center by the north doors (of course). I walked across the store again, used the restroom, and then found the bird seed.

I checked out and waked to the south doors where my car was. While I was loading my car, a car pulled into the handicapped parking space not far from my car. I walked up to the car and tapped on the window. A sweet older lady rolled her window down and I informed her she might want to drive over to the north doors so she didn’t have to walk so far. She said “What the hell”. I told her that was what I said too. We laughed, she thanked me and then pulled out to drive to the north end.

I finished loading up my car and came home. Man, going to Walmart got my steps in for the day. I will be glad when their remodel is complete.

Haven’t done much this afternoon. My Zoom meeting got pushed back to Wednesday so that freed up my afternoon. I did get a check, a VENMO and a PayPal donation for Love in Action today. I also got the final payout from the birthday giving fund from PayPal. Now I can reconcile August to September and will be ready to post the month-end report. I already requested a payout from VENMO for the month so this VENMO donation will show up in the October report. I can change the totals for the month-end report and add the check and PayPal donation so those can be reported as received in September.

Kathy and I are both tired today. Not sure what is up with that. Neither one of us had much energy today. I have had a bit of a headache all day along with tummy issues. My tummy has seemed to have quieted down but the headache is still there.

I looked at the weather forecast and we are to get rain the next four days. Best enjoy the sunshine we have had this afternoon while it lasts. I sure like these cooler temperatures.

Have worked on drinking lots today so I don’t get dehydrated. Not sure why I have days like this but am finally learning how to deal with them. The gastrointestinal doctor didn’t find any cause for them, only medications to treat the symptoms when they appear. I am more aggressive with using Imodium and the anti-nausea meds than I used to be. It does help stop them quicker but sure doesn’t fix whatever is broke.

No plans for the rest of the week other than the Zoom meeting on Wednesday. It is nice to have some breathing space. The supplies from the bulk order for the Go Bags should start coming in Wednesday so that will keep me busy for a bit getting all those supplies sorted and tucked away. When I get the 100 Go Bags I will get a better idea of how much space I am going to need.

Can’t find much information on a news story I read on Sunday which stated ICE is no longer going after those with just a deportation order and is going to focus on those that have a criminal record. I trust that it is true but know it is just a ploy that they will use until the election is over the first part of November. If the election does not go blue, the raids and foolishness will return.

If the election goes blue, I am hoping that the need for Go Bags will not be as great as if the results go red. My intuition told me to only do 100 and wait and see what happens. Hoping that is a sign we will go blue and the number of deportations will drop significantly and the Go Bags will not be as needed.

It is so hard to get a real read on what is happening in the Middle East right now. Not sure why it is so hard but it sure seems to be. I have some on-line people that I listen to that seem to know more than the major newspapers and TV stations. It is not as good over there as is being reported by the White House.

My trip with Nicole is in just a little over a month away. I need to check my clothes and see if I need anything. It will be in the 50’s there so need cooler weather clothes. I only take a carry on so need to choose carefully what I take. Hoping I can wear shoes that match this time, unlike my last trip to India and Nepal when I had a matching pair to what I was wearing back home.

That in-between feeling is strong today. Not sure what I am in-between but it can cause some anxiety and restlessness in me. Sitting with what is and attempting to soothe the inner child that seems upset. In this moment, all is well. That is all I need to be concerned about.

Grateful my tummy has quieted down, grateful for the steps I got in at Walmart today, and grateful for some breathing space this afternoon.

This has been a short day. I finally slept the clock around last night. Kathy came in to check on me to make sure I was still breathing around noon. Man, it feels different when I sleep all night!

I worked on the month-end report for Love in Action this afternoon. I write it a couple days early and then reread, re-edit, etc. a couple times before it is ready to post the first of the month. Sure wish I could learn to be less wordy but there is a lot that happens each month and I never know what to leave out.

I will balance the month-end books on the 30th and double check that the numbers I reported were correct. I have some funds from PayPal that I am not sure how they will handle. I did a birthday post and PayPal pays out the funds over time. I expect the second half of the payout yet this month. There record keeping and tracking on that event is a bit hard to follow.

I wrote six thank you notes and put them in the mailbox. I thought I was done but found a couple more when I was working on the month-end report that I need to write. I’m sure I miss some along the way. Sure wish VENMO would give me mailing addresses too so those that give that way can be better acknowledged. I have never posted names of donors on the Love in Action facebook page. I’m sure some wouldn’t mind seeing their name but know others wouldn’t appreciate it. It would be a burden to contact everyone and see what their preference is so I don’t list any.

Tomorrow morning I need to go to Emporia and get some new CPAP supplies. I need to do a better job of replacing the plastic part of my face mask monthly. It gets stretched out and then leaks all night and I take off my mask as a result. I am eligible for a partial replacement of the mask monthly but forget to do so. Tomorrow is my six-month point of having the CPAP so will get a full new face mask, tubing, a new water tank and some filters.

I have a Zoom meeting tomorrow afternoon with an immigration attorney so we can talk current policies on immigration and post to the Love in Action Facebook page. There are so many people that think that the undocumented have done nothing to fix their status. They don’t understand how the laws and policies have changed making it a real challenge to fix their status, in fact, in most cases impossible.

The rest of the week is full of empty space right now. We shall see if that holds through the week. Most weeks something or other comes up and I am always grateful I have the space to deal with what comes up.

Ants have returned to our house. They had pretty much disappeared but with the recent rain have come back. They are NOT a welcome guest in my house. Kathy had gotten a pizza today and when she went back to get another piece, the box was full of ants. YUCK! I did one spray and will do another one tonight.

Still sitting with the totes and trying to figure out the best way to organize them. The bulk order is to be in this week so that will let me know how much space I will need. I’m sure this will all sort itself out soon enough. It is nice not to have four boxes of stuff in the dining room. Not sure the tote rack and totes is a fashionable use of my dining room but it is what it is.

Only three months till Christmas. Oh my. I suppose I should give some time and attention to it. I will be gone for 16 days in November so November will feel like a short month. I think I know what I want to do this year. Just need to get a list going and get it done. Years ago when the kids were little, I would take a weeks vacation the end of October and do all my shopping then. I don’t buy near as many gifts these days so it doesn’t take a week to get it all done.

This week I hope to work on exploring grant opportunities, exploring some bulk providers for some of the goods needed for the Go Bags, and figuring out some dates and times to do the work parties to put the go bags together. We shall see how successful I am with any or all of those things.

Grateful for lots of sleep at last, grateful the month-end report writing has begun, and grateful for lots of empty space this week.

Phil came over this morning and put together the rack that holds 12 totes. I will store the Go Bags in them. Not sure they will be big enough to hold everything but it is a start. I will probably change my mind and try six different options before this is over.

It was interesting to watch Phil put the thing together. I realized just before he came over I had put two pieces on wrong. He helped me fix that and then took over. I find picture only instructions to be a bit of a challenge. However, it can be done!

They fit in the space I wanted them to fit in. I had to take somethings off the wall behind them and need to figure where to put them. This house does not have lots of empty wall space.

While Phil was here he tightened up the bathroom faucets. One of them was really loose and I was afraid I would be able to turn water on and then not be able to turn it off one day soon. Nice to have that little job taken care of too.

After Phil left I sorted things and put them in the totes. I haven’t labeled them yet as I still need to think through what I am doing. For now, men and women’s underwear are in the same tote for example. When I get the big bulk order in the next couple of weeks, I will be able to determine better how to sort things. Still not sure what I will do with 100 filled backpacks but I will cross that bridge when I get to it. Not sure how much space that will take up.

It is obvious I don’t think things all the way through sometimes. In fact, I will admit I rarely do. If I did, I’m not sure I would tackle some of these bigger projects due to fear. When you don’t know what you don’t know it is easier to proceed – right?

Went to Emporia this afternoon and picked up some groceries. I didn’t do anything else while I was there. I didn’t need a lot of things but what I did need I was out of so it was urgent to get them.

Fell asleep in my chair this afternoon and took a good nap. I haven’t had a chair nap in a while. For some reason, chair naps hit differently than taking a nap in the bed.

I drove home from Emporia in the rain this afternoon. It has finally cleared off and it is a beautiful day out now. We have lots of rain in the forecast for this week so better enjoy the sun while it shines.

I still need to clean up the tools and extra parts from the tote rack building episode this morning. They sent parts so you can attach the rack to a wall. My floor leans a lot in the area where we put the racks. Phil had to put some shims to make the rack somewhat level front to back. I don’t think there is a chance of it falling over as it tips to the back up against the wall anyways. I have four extra totes that I need to find a place to put. I will use them as extra storage when all the pieces of supplies come in. Not sure where but I will figure it out. May be motivation to reorganize the back room and get rid of somethings out there. I’ve been at this house for over two years now, if I haven’t used it by now, I probably won’t and it can go.

Maybe I will get motivated and do some cleaning again. There are a few places that are starting to bug me which is my reminder to get after it. I also need to replace two light bulbs that I keep forgetting to take care of.

I have a meeting on Monday afternoon and I need to go to Emporia and pick up some CPAP supplies. The rest of the week is filled with empty space. Somehow my empty space seems to get filled up but I am grateful I am available if a need comes up.

Feeling a bit blah this evening. I need to connect with my tribe and get some soul food. Maybe I can make that happen next week. When I go too long without some deep conversation, I get detached but not in a good way.

Grateful the tote rack is together thanks to Phil, grateful the bathtub faucet got fixed, and grateful for a chair nap.

Just got home from the EHS football game. I left after halftime. My granddaughter Ellexia is a cheerleader so I went to watch her cheer. The track was wet so they couldn’t do any stunts tonight. It was nice to sit with Michelle and visit with her while I was there.

Before I went to the football game I went to the farewell bash for retiring Captain Jay. Two of the people I work with at the Center through Love in Action were responsible for the party. They did a great job. I didn’t know too many people there but was able to talk to a few of the staff from the Center. Jay will be missed. It was obvious his staff appreciated him.

Didn’t do much at home today. I didn’t feel my best today. I wasn’t really ill but wasn’t 100% either. I sat in the in-between space most of the day. I took good care of myself and am feeling better tonight.

I did double check all the goods that have arrived from Amazon via the Released Detainee Gift Registry. I found I am missing two packages of women’s leggings and the package of note pads. The note pads I could track and for some reason they have gotten delayed in shipment. Interestingly, both of the orders for the leggings show no tracking available. I sent a message to one of the people that ordered them and asked her to check on them. Not sure why there was no tracking information available. The other three packages of leggings had come in.

I think my handyman is coming over tomorrow to put the rack together that will hold the 12 totes full of supplies. The rack is partially put together and is in the middle of my living room. It is hard to get out the front door right now. The totes themselves came in today and I left them on the front porch as I don’t have any room to put them. Hopefully that mess will get sorted out tomorrow and I can place items in the totes which will be in the rack.

I got notification that the bulk order has shipped. I was surprised that they are shipping individual boxes – I think I have 15 boxes coming. It will be interesting to see if they show up all at once or if they come one by one. Once those are here I can start scheduling the parties to help sort everything and get the backpacks ready to go.

If it isn’t raining tomorrow I have somewhere to go in the afternoon. I’m not going if it is raining. I do need to buy some groceries so will do that rain or shine. No plans for Sunday and Monday morning I have to go to Emporia and get some CPAP supplies. I have a Zoom meeting Monday afternoon. The rest of the week is empty space.

I scheduled my flu and Covid shots for October 5. Sometimes I have a reaction to the Covid shot for a day or so. Last year I didn’t. Kathy had hers earlier in September and had no reaction.

Time to start working on the month end report for Love in Action. This month has flown by again. It was a busy one for Love in Action and it will take me a bit to write the report. We raised lots of money but I spent a lot too with the big order for the bulk items for the Go bags.

As I was driving home this evening I got to enjoy the full harvest moon. There was a rainbow all around the edges of the moon. I am grateful I got to enjoy the sight of the full moon. Since I moved to town, I don’t follow the cycle of the moon as closely as I did when I could see it easier. It did my heart good tonight to spend some time with her.

Did some research today and confirmed that hiring an undocumented person is considered a more explicit violation of the US Criminal code than simply being undocumented. Wonder why we are picking up the undocumented and not going after the business owners? If we really wanted to go after the criminals, we would go after the business owners.

Sitting with a feeling that ICE will be in our neck of the woods next week. I trust I am wrong. I can’t imagine what families are feeling right now. I wish others realized the obstacles that have been placed in front of our immigrants and how challenging and long the process is to get documented. I am tired of reading the comments that said they should have done things the right way. Heavens knows, most of them have but our government has made it impossible for them to complete the process now. Court dates are years out and even thought they are in the process, they are being taken and deported, most without a criminal record.

This has been a hard week watching what happened in western Kansas. I can’t imagine the disruption that it has caused and will continue to cause. I can’t quite wrap my head around the fact that the immigrants are being treated so badly. All because they have a different skin tone? I trust things will correct themselves, sooner rather than later.

Grateful to see Ellexia cheer tonight, grateful to be a part of celebrating the Captain’s retirement, and grateful to be feeling better this evening.

This has been a two trip to Emporia type of day. The first trip was to take Roxy to the Vet to have her stitches removed. The Vet Tech had to lay on the floor as Roxy refused to lay down. We hope she got all the stitches out of the two incisions on Roxy’s tummy. Roxy did well, was given a few treats and made the ride home with no issue. She was happy to jump out of the car when we got home.

The second trip was to go pick up a prescription and to go to The Orchard to get some Jonathan apples. They are the only apples I like and they are not available year round. I will enjoy them while they last. I also picked up a jug of honey and a small apple slush. I couldn’t drink all the slush but Kathy was happy to finish it for me when I got home.

I got deliveries four different times today of things others had purchased off the Amazon Gift Registry as well as things I had ordered. I am attempting to put together a large tote stand. It is going to take a bit to get it done. I will keep working on it in bits and pieces and I will get there. The lids to the totes arrived but the totes themselves are to come tomorrow.

I had ordered some Apple Air Tags and those came in. I want one for my suitcase for my trip in November. I also want to put one in Kathy’s car so I can find her if needed. Not sure what I will do with the other two. Maybe I need to put one on my iPhone somehow so I can find the damn thing. I spend more time looking for it than I do using it.

I agreed yesterday to pay for 170 $10 phone cards for the Detainees as their Christmas present. That works out to $1,700. I also agreed to purchase cheesecake for their Thanksgiving desert. I got home and looked at my balance sheet and realized I had committed all the extra funds Love in Action has on hand right now.

This morning I woke up and found four donors had sent via VENMO or PayPal almost $1,400. One donor had send $1,000. The Universe does provide! I take that as a sign to continue doing what I am doing and to step out in faith knowing the money will show up. I still have extra stamps to send to the Center when they request them. We are down to five Pen Pals so are not using so many emails we have to pay for. The October treats are paid for so think I will slide by for a bit with what we have on hand now. If the Go Bags go quickly in December, I will need $2,010 to order another 100 of them and most of the supplies we put in them. That feels doable as people are so generous and send funds as they can.

I need to do one more count of all the items that were ordered off of the Amazon Gift Registry for the Go Bags. I think most everything has arrived. It is hard to track as some tell me who the package is from and some do not. I want to make sure everything is here so I can notify all the donors the things they ordered arrived. I wish I had email or mailing addresses for all the donors that purchase things off of the gift registry. I am lucky to get a “real” name as some people protect their privacy and order under fake names. I want the donors to know they are appreciated and I can’t do that without information about them.

The one thing we still need for the first 100 Go Bags is more hoodies and sweat shirts, sweat pants and leggings. The bulk place doesn’t stock those. We can pass out bags without them if needed. They will still get a T-shirt, underwear, socks and the ladies will get a sports bra.

Tomorrow I am going to the reception for Jay Whitney. He has been the Captain of the Chase County Detention Center and is the one that allowed Love in Action to be possible. He is leaving it in good hands with Captain Denna Fleshman taking his place. I took Jay out for lunch in August to thank him for all he did for Love in Action and look forward to seeing him one last time tomorrow.

After the reception I am going to Emporia to go to the high school football game if it isn’t raining. Ellexia is cheering and I like to go watch her a few games a year. I don’t attempt to go to all of them. I don’t like driving after dark but sometimes a Grandma has to do what she has to do!

Once I get the tote rack and totes I can sort what we have received so far. I am still waiting on the bulk order to come in with the backpacks, blankets, toiletries, etc. Once that comes in I can schedule the first of several helper parties. The first helper party will be to take all the goods out of the plastic they are wrapped in. The next party will be to wash and dry and make sure all the goods are sorted appropriately by sizes. The last party will be putting the items in the backpacks.

I am hoping everything arrives in the next two weeks so I can get the parties scheduled for the last two weeks of October. I want to have them done before I leave on vacation in November. The week after I get home is Thanksgiving and people will be busy and less likely to come help. We start distribution of the Go Bags the first of December.

If this program is successful, we may have to have three parties a month from now on to help unwrap, wash and sort and then stuff the bags. There is a possibility of needing at least 100 bags a month. If we need more than that, I will have to up the supply of goods to 150 or 200 items at a time. We shall see what happens.

Wonder when ICE will show up in Emporia? I am betting it is next week unless the dogs are called off. I am a notary so if any family needs to make power of attorney decisions so children are taken care of in case a parent or both parents disappear, please reach out to me. I can help draw up the documents and notarize them for you.

I still can’t wrap my head around the why things are happening. We have made it almost impossible for immigrants to become citizens and follow the “law of the land”. There is the written law and then there is the policy. Current policy is to disregard the written law and deport as many as humanely possible in the shortest amount of time. ICE has removed the names of those with a pending deportation order from their rosters of where they are being held so attorneys can’t find them and advocate for them.

I don’t feel like my personal rights will be honored if something should happen and I get picked up. There doesn’t seem to be much priority given to the letter of the law these days.

It breaks my heart to see the comments from privileged white people cheering on what ICE is doing. I guess you can only see what you can see. I just can’t quite comprehend how they can witness what is happening and think it is OK.

Grateful for all the goods sent via the registry, grateful for the donations that show me what I am doing is the right thing to do, and grateful I stand on the side of love.

I got woke up by a text this morning at 7:00. That is way too early to text me people! I stayed in bed after I finished the business the text required but not sure I got more rest.

I went to the post office and checked the mailbox for Love in Action. Only junk mail in it. Did another errand and came back home.

This afternoon I met with the Captain and two other staff members at the Detention Center. I needed to pay our share of the piece of exercise equipment that is long overdue. The piece of equipment has shipped but I am not going to hold my breath as to when it will be here. I’m sure after it arrives, it will take them some time to get it together. They are going to host a ribbon cutting ceremony for it once it is here and all set up.

While there we also talked about the Go Bag project. I was given a list of things that I cannot put in the bags and some ideas of things that I can. We talked about how the checking in of the bags for the Detainee will work and what information they need to make that go faster. Found out that those held by the US Marshall, even if they are ICE Detainees, will not be eligible to receive a bag. I will have to check with the Center every time I get a request for a bag, to make sure the person requesting a Go Bag is not being held by the US Marshall Service. I also have to double check to make sure the family didn’t deliver a bag already for them. They won’t be allowed to take a bag from their family and a Go Bag from Love in Action.

Got some good news from them. I have attempted to offer the Detainees a phone card since I started the program. The Center has figured out a way to make that happen. For our Christmas treat, Love in Action is going to gift each Detainee a $10 phone card so they can call their family. For Christmas. The Center is averaging 170 Detainees right now so this little project will cost $1,700. I think I just broke my budget. We will figure out a way to make this happen, somehow, someway!

We are providing a small bag of candy as our treat for Halloween and a piece of cheesecake for the Thanksgiving dinner that the Center provides. Neither of those are too expensive. I will have to come up with something not too expensive for January but I will worry about that later.

Found out that it had taken the Captain over three hours to find out where the documents were for the transport I did last week. She did put a new procedure in place so that the Department of Homeland Security will notify the Center where the documents are being held at the time of the Detainee’s release. We shall see if that actually happens. I appreciate the Captain’s effort to attempt to put that into place.

I heard from Helen, the transport from last week. She had her hearing in Maryland and unfortunately all the court did was continue her case. Because no decision was reached the court did not return her work permit to her. She will have another hearing in November in Maryland. She won’t be able to work between now and then. Dang, they make it hard for our neighbors and friends to support themselves.

Took a short nap this afternoon. I have felt really tired this week for some reason. Grateful I can rest when my body needs it.

Tomorrow I am taking Roxy to the Vet at 10:00 so her stitches can be removed. I have a few errands to do in Emporia but I will have to make two trips to town to do them as I can’t do them with Roxy with me.

Friday I have a reception and dinner to go to and then I am going to the football game in Emporia to watch Ellexia cheer. Saturday I have an event to go to in the afternoon. Monday I am doing a Zoom chat with someone in the afternoon. After that the week is full of empty space – at least right now. My empty space has a way of filling up in the most unexpected ways lately.

I made the mistake of reading the comments from people about the ICE raids that are happening in western KS this week. It is sad to see the number of people cheering on ICE. I wonder if they will connect the dots when their meat prices are higher when the processing plants don’t have the labor to make their products or when farms go bankrupt due to lack of labor.

I agree with picking up criminals. Unfortunately, from what I have learned, the majority of people they are picking up are in violation of paperwork dates due to the backlog of our immigration court system. Most have done everything possible to follow the law of the land but our government keeps changing the rules and doesn’t give them timely court dates. It is hard to be “legal” when the rules keep changing and dates are not available.

I bet it will only be a matter of time before ICE is in Emporia and picks up people there. It breaks my heart to see families torn apart. The poverty levels will increase as the main wage earner of the family is disappeared. Children will be left behind without a parent or possibly both parents.

I never dreamed I would live through a time like this. We are reliving the Holocaust all over again. When this is over, I want to say I stood on the side of love.

Grateful for the partnership with the Center as we work together to help the Detainees, grateful we get to gift the Detainees a phone card, and grateful to stand on the side of love in these trying times.

I got laundry wash, dried, folded and put away today. I think that is my only accomplishment of the day! Just one of those days. I don’t have a lot going on to do. I really need to explore grants for Love in Action but that didn’t happen today. I have to be in the right mood for that and today wasn’t it.

Got three more boxes from Amazon that others ordered for the Go Bags. I think I have a system lined out now to track what comes in and what was ordered so I can ensure all that items ordered get here. Split shipments really throw me off though. Sometimes I get a tag telling me who it is from and other times I don’t. Will do the best I can with the information I get to make sure all is accounted for.

Need to go to Emporia tomorrow and pick up another prescription that is ready. I missed getting this one yesterday by about two hours. Dang it anyways. Will attempt to pick up a few groceries while I am there. Sometimes I can make myself do that sometimes I can’t. We shall see what happens tomorrow.

Thursday I take Roxy in to get her stitches out. She has healed up nicely from her two incisions and it should be an easy visit. I do want to remember to ask for a written copy of the biopsy results so I know for sure what type of cancer she has. The vet told me but I have no idea what she said. Those terms are not normally part of my vocabulary so I didn’t remember them.

Friday I am going to the reception for the Captain of the Detention Center who is retiring this week. He is the one that allowed Love in Action to be a guest in his house and do what we do. After the reception I am going to the high school football game to watch Ellexia cheer. Saturday I have an event to go to in the afternoon for a short bit.

Still feeling like I am sitting in the in-between space. Still not sure what I am in-between but thinking it is more world energy than my own. Things are speeding up and happening fast in the bigger world right now and I feel a huge shift coming. It will be a challenging time for many.

During times like that I do my best to stay grounded so I can be full and open to noticing my neighbors that may need a helping hand. The cuts the Big Beautiful Bill made are starting to make themselves known and the hurt they are and will continue to cause is big. May my heart remain open so I can be a guiding light to others.

Grateful for a cooler day and open windows, grateful to take another day of rest, and grateful for all the supplies that are arriving daily for the Go Bags.

I met Jason and Michelle at 627 for lunch today. Always a treat to spend time with my kids and I got two out of three today.

My tummy started acting up when I was done eating and I was off to the race to the bathroom for a bit. Dang, I hate when I am away from home and it does that.

I had planned on picking up a few things at Walmart when I stopped to get my prescription but all I ended up with was the prescription. The pharmacy is close to the bathroom and I didn’t trust that if I walked to where the things were I wanted I could get back to a bathroom fast enough. I was lucky to get home without stopping.

Took a nap when I got home. Am feeling a bit more settled now but am drained! I was lucky I had some of my medication with me and took it right away. It finally kicked in and things have stopped. Now to drink a boat load of fluids as I feel a bit dehydrated.

I’ll have to go back to town another day to get the groceries I needed. Oh well, I’m sure in another day or two I will think of other things I need too.

Haven’t done much else today. No energy at all this afternoon.

I’m sure that was all TMI. Sorry about that. I use this blog as my diary and it helps to have record of how often this happens so I can report accurately to my gastrointestinal doctor.

No plans for tomorrow or Wednesday. I do have some things for Love in Action I can work on – that is always the case! I need to start exploring grants and writing some letters to places that might be willing to help us with our Go Bags.

Things are starting to arrive that others have ordered off of Amazon. It is going to take a bit at some point to get all the packages opened and everything sorted. Right now I am stacking them in boxes still in the tight packaging so it stores as small as possible. I am struggling a bit to match what comes in with what was ordered so I can be sure we get everything. Some of the packages have gift tags so I know who sent them but some do not. Some of orders come all together and some are split into different shipments and arrival days. I will get a system down sooner or later.

Kathy handles our recycling and she is going to stay busy taking boxes and packing to the recycling place.

I think I am going to Costco to get a bulk tote holding rack and totes that fit. I have space for 12 totes and the rack in my dining room. That will give me space for most of the things. I plan on doing 100 at a time. When I get the big shipment from the bulk place I will have a better understanding of the space that this will take up. I do have offers of some places I can store things and I may have to use those spaces too.

It will take some volunteers a day to get everything opened and sorted and then washed up before we can stuff the backpacks. I will get a day on the books and see if anyone signs up to help. My house is small so can’t use lots of people at one time but it would give others a chance to participate in a “hands on” event. I will schedule another day to stuff the packs.

Nice to have a couple quiet days this week. I thought I was going to have some last week and then ended up doing the transport on two different days. I never know when my empty space days will get filled with unexpected things to take care of. Grateful I have empty space days and can be available for emergency needs.

Got 60 more stamps today for the Detainees. It is such a budget saver to have people donate stamps. I haven’t had to buy stamps since July. That saves several hundred dollars on my budget a month to not have to buy stamps.

I have been sending lots of thank you notes lately so may need to buy myself some stamps. I use my personal stamps to send thank you notes as I want every dollar and stamp that comes in to go to the detainees. Buying stamps for thank you notes is the least I can do for the program.

Sitting in what feels an in-between space today. Not sure what I am in between but there is a restlessness that I am feeling that isn’t allowing me to be in my peaceful valley. Something big feels like it is coming in and I have no idea what it is. The world chaos feels like it is getting ready for another plot twist of sorts. Maybe that is what I am feeling. I never am quite sure and I do my best to stay out of worry and fear and instead spend the time grounding myself and reminding myself all I can control is my response to whatever might happen.

Grateful for the donation of stamps, grateful for time with Jason and Michelle, and grateful things have slowed down a bit.

I went to bed early last night as we lost power. When the lights came back on 45 minutes later it woke me up. I got up and turned off all the lights and went back to bed. Luckily, I was able to go back to sleep.

Because I went to bed early, I woke up earlier than I like too. It feels like a long day when I get up before 8:00 or 9:00.

I wrote another long post for Love in Action about what I have learned from the Detainees and the process they have to go through these days. It has gotten lots of action, comments, shares. The good news is I have gotten several nice donations and lots more purchases off of the Amazon gift registry. People need to know the reality of the immigration system these days. It is not easy to navigate.

A lady that a friend knows called me this evening for some help. A relative of the lady had been picked up on a moving car violation and then detained. He had an outstanding deportation order against him. He is being held in Chase County. She needed help figuring out how to zoom call with him, deposit funds in the commissary, etc. I also let her know about taking him a Go Bag in case he gets deported. One never knows how fast that happens and he won’t have time to let them know when it is happening. He will just disappear.

It has been a quiet day at home. I did get my written thank you notes in the mailbox at least until the donations started coming in today. I have some email thank you notes I need to send. VENMO gives me email addresses of donors but not mailing addresses. PayPal gives me mailing addresses.

The guy that is updating the website got in touch with me today. He said it won’t be difficult to make changes so I sent him the changes I need. I will double check when he is done and see if I forgot to mention anything. I so appreciate his effort and donation of his time to do that for me.

No plans this week until Thursday. I do need to go to town tomorrow and pick up a prescription that is ready. I would also like to track down some Jonathan apples but I don’t know if anyone has them this year. I should have gone to The Orchard today but didn’t. I may try to go there later this week.

It was so nice today that the temperature dropped. It is very humid out but still better than it has been. It is supposed to be in the 70’s all week. I will take it! Can’t wait to open the windows and let fresh air in.

Grateful for all the donations that came in today. It gives me hope that this Go Bag project will be funded. I still need to look into grants and send some solicitation letters to local churches, etc. It is a bit overwhelming when I think how much I may need to raise but I will take it one step at a time and 100 bags at a time and go from there. So far, the funds have come in for everything I have requested them for.

These two quiet days have been good for my soul. I finally feel grounded again. Writing the article today was good for me too. Sometimes it helps to write things out. I seem to be able to release them better when I do.

Grateful for the response to the note I posted today, grateful for the cooler temperatures, and grateful for another quiet day at home.

This has been pretty much a recovery day for me. I didn’t sleep very well last night so it has been a low energy type of day.

Kathy and I made the mistake of going downtown around 4:00 to go to the Chase County Days event. It was too flipping hot to be out. My car said 102. I am so grateful there is a cold front coming in to break this heat wave. I am kinda over the heat for the year.

We are in a severe thunderstorm watch for the evening. Doesn’t feel like it is going to rain but these fall systems can move in quickly. Heavy wind and hail is the main threat tonight.

Got my house insurance bill. It is over $300 more than a year ago. I did add a 200 sq foot addition but $300 for that? I think it is time to shop around. Over $2,000 for a 1,200 sq ft house is kinda high, especially since I haven’t had any claims. How do people afford to own a house these days between the rising interest rates, insurance and rising property taxes. Yikes!

Got the first two boxes of things from Amazon people ordered off the Deported Detainee Support Gift Registry. I haven’t opened them yet. I need to decide what I am going to do with them and where to store them. Costco has a storage rack that will hold 12 totes. I am strongly considering ordering that. It would fit in my living room. I rarely have company so it really won’t be in the way. It won’t look nice but that is the least of my concerns.

I will sit with it for a bit and then decide if I want to get it or not. The other option is to store things off site. That has its pros and cons. Since I will be taking bags up one at a time, it sure would be more convenient to have everything here. Trying to imagine how much space 100 filled bags plus extras of everything will take. I don’t have good spatial judgment.

I need to come up with a tracking system of some sort so I know that what people ordered is what I am getting. I never knew for sure when people ordered things that were sent directly to the Center if they ever got them or not. I would feel more comfortable coming up with a system that I can double check to make sure all is well.

I spent some time balancing my Love in Action books today. We get funds from several different sources and sometimes it is a challenge to balance the books. PayPal pays out twice a month automatically except for the birthday fund and that is paid a month after they receive the funds, VENMO I have to request the funds, Zeffy sends funds automatically weekly, checks I deposit and record, Zella pays into my personal account which I then have to transfer. Yikes! No wonder it can take me some time to balance it all.

I feel so responsible handling other people’s money that I keep a very close eye on it to make sure the gift is handled properly. I also struggle to spend the money and ask myself constantly is this really necessary.

No plans for tomorrow although I have a prescription that is ready to be picked up. I also would like to go to the apple orchard and see if the Jonathan apples are ready. They are the only apples I really like and I like to get a bunch when they are in season.

So far next week I have lots of empty space until Thursday. I have to take Roxy to the Vet Thursday to get her stitches out. Friday I have a reception to go to and then a football game to go to watch Ellexia cheer. Saturday I have an event to pop in at for a bit in the afternoon. Trusting the empty space will hold. Sometimes it does, and sometimes not so much.

Someday soon I need to start exploring grants and do some serious fundraising. If the Go Bags are requested at the level of need, we will need 100 – 125 at least a month. They cost about $50 each to put together. That is a lot of money when you multiply that by 12 months. What had I gotten myself into?

Grateful for the air conditioning when I got home from downtown this afternoon, grateful for the friends I got to visit with briefly when we were downtown, and grateful today was a quiet day.

What a long day! I was in my car for over nine hours today. My ankles are swollen and protesting tonight.

I got a call at 8:45 from Captain Fleshman from the Detention Center letting me know the driver’s license for the lady I transported yesterday are at the office in KCMO. I immediately called the volunteer that said she would drive Helen’s car to that office and agreed to meet her at Helen’s hotel at 10:00.

I got there at 10:05 and Helen and the volunteer were waiting for me. We exchanged hugs and information about where we were headed. We agreed not to caravan and each stop independently as needed for the three hour trip to the office of the Department of Homeland Security which is located up by the airport in KCMO. Helen rode with the volunteer in her own car and I drove my car alone.

My tummy was not happy with me today so I had to make a couple of bathroom stops. I realized I was trying to balance holding the truth that how immigrants are being treated these days sucks and the truth that love is present and people can be very helpful as evidence by the help the Captain provided and the volunteer provided.

One can hold opposite points of view and find that sweet spot where one can hold themselves in balance with holding them. I struggled all the way to KCMO to find that sweet spot. My tummy did not like the struggle today!

We got to the office in KCMO around 1:30 and Helen was able to retrieve her driver’s license. The office is holding her social security card and her work permit. They said they would possibly be returned to her at her court hearing in Baltimore, Maryland next week.

I gave Helen some cash for her trip home. She is driving herself to Maryland this weekend. She lives alone and has had to pay rent and utilities for the time she was detained with no income coming in. She promised to let us know the outcome of her hearing next week.

We gave Helen lots of hugs and blessings and then the volunteer and I headed back to Wichita. We stopped for lunch and the volunteered paid for my lunch! She did me a hugh favor by helping me out today and still she paid for my lunch. Then we stopped for gas and she hopped out and paid for the tank of gas. Geez! What a blessing she was for me today.

We had a delightful conversation on the way home and the trip home went fast. I got home around 6:30 this evening. My ankles are not happy with me sitting for nine hours and are swollen and complaining. I told them to stand in line! I am a bit cranky and deeply grateful tonight.

Thankfully I don’t have anything on my calendar for the weekend. It is going to take me a day or two to decompress and allow myself to feel all the feels. There is an emotional component to doing the transfers that shows up after I get home. I have learned I will need some time and space to process all the feels and get back to my grounded center.

It may be an early bedtime for me tonight. I feel very empty and drained tonight. It was a roller coaster of emotions for me and I am feeling that tonight.

Grateful for the help from the Captain and the volunteer today, grateful for a safe trip of over nine hours today, and grateful for the peace and quiet of home tonight.

This day had another plot twist thrown in for kicks and giggles. Keeps me on my toes.

Kathy and I went to the gym this morning and met with the owner Jerod. He is so kind, a good listener and really came up with a program for each of us that feels doable. I find most trainers get set in their ways on what they want you to do and don’t listen. I told Jerod I get overwhelmed easily and want to start out slow and add on things as times goes on. He got that! He stuck with us and taught us what to do.

We plan on going daily to use the bike and then every other day we will add the resistance training. I think I can keep this up as Kathy will be going with me.

After we were done at the gym I decided to go to Wichita and get my Costco shopping done. We really needed a new vacuum so Kathy and I headed for Wichita. We were going to eat at Chipotle but they were closed due to the boil water order in Wichita.

We went to Costco and overfilled a cart. I found a vacuum and a whole cart load of shit I didn’t know I needed. After we checked out we ate at their lunch counter and then came home.

I had just gotten on the Turnpike when the Detention Center called and asked if I could transport someone to Wichita. Sure, but I have to get home and unload the car first and then I would come get her.

Her name is Helen and her birth country is Nigeria. Her family lives in Maryland and she works and lives in Larned, KS. Her car was in Wichita and she wanted to get her car so I drove her there.

Her problem is no one seems to know what ICE did with her driver’s license and other personal documents. They may be at the Wichita ICE office or at the KCMO office. I called the Captain of the Chase Center facility and she is going to help track them down.

Helen can’t drive without her driver’s license as if she did and got pulled over, she would immediately go back into detention and then they would have a reason to deport her.

She has my number and will call me if she needs help getting them tomorrow. I am attempting to find someone from Wichita to help her go to their office tomorrow if that is where her documents are. If they are in KC I am going to find someone to go with me to pick her up in Wichita, then they will drive her car to KCMO, and ride home with me. I will take Helen in my car to KCMO.

She has to be in Baltimore, Maryland, Monday, September 21 for a mandatory court hearing. If she misses it, an order for deportation will be placed against her. She can’t drive there until she gets her license and she can’t fly there without an ID.

We shall see what happens tomorrow. Hopefully her documents are in Wichita and she can retrieve them in the morning and get home to Larned tomorrow and then get to Maryland this weekend.

Dang, ICE makes this tough and sets people up to fail.

Not sure making two trips to Wichita was on my Bingo card today. She was a delightful young woman and much appreciated the drive and potential help tomorrow. Makes it all worth it!

Not much empty space time today! Maybe tomorrow if I don’t have to drive to Wichita and then to KCMO. We shall see what happens.

Picked up part of the Halloween candy for the Center today. They had it on sale. I think it was last year that it was hard to find closer to Halloween. I still need to get some Mexican candy and then I can fill the bags and be ready. Have six weeks until Halloween but the way time is flying by, I like to have things in the house way before I need them.

No plans for the weekend. Downtown Cottonwood Falls is having some sort of goings on Saturday so may walk down and check that out. Not much for crowds so doubt I stay long. We shall see.

Nothing on my calendar for next week other than going to the gym. I’m excited to start working out again and Kathy and I promised each other we would nag the other into going. Hoping with an accountability partner I will do better this time. It also helped that Jerod showed me what to do.

I’m tired tonight. I don’t normally drive over four hours in a day. Thankful I went to Wichita instead of KCMO for the second trip of the day. Trusting the documents will be in Wichita tomorrow and I won’t have to go to Wichita and then KCMO tomorrow. I will if needed though.

I feel like I am on a world tour without leaving KS. First the man from Afghanistan, then the young man from India, the father from Palestine, the young lady from China, the young man from Russia and now a beautiful woman from Nigeria. We are the world!

Grateful another detainee was released, grateful for the volunteers that will come forward and help me out tomorrow, and grateful for my first day back in the gym.

Another pajama day. I got up and got going this morning doing some things and forgot to get dressed. By the time I realized I still wasn’t dressed it was mid-afternoon and I have no plans to go anywhere and no plans for anyone to come over so why not stay in my pajamas. It will save laundry!

The Vet called today with the results of the mass she removed from Roxy almost a week ago. One of them was a fatty lump which we expected. The other one on one of her teats was cancer. The Vet had gotten it all out with good margins on most of it. There were a couple places where the margins were narrow.

The Vet didn’t recommend any treatments. I am to keep a close eye on her and if another sore develops I am to take her in sooner rather than later. She may need more surgery in the future if it comes back. Roxy turned 10 this year so no plans to do chemo if the cancer comes back.

She has recovered well from her surgery. She is moving fine and doing her normal things. We shall see what happens in the future. The Vet said it is a mildly aggressive cancer. We shall love on Roxy and see what her future holds.

Worked on some Love in Action stuff today. I have gotten several notifications that people are making purchases of the needed items for the Go Bags. I mailed the big order for the bulk items along with the check. I expect the items to arrive in about two weeks or so.

Next steps have been taken. Will continue to take baby steps everyday and trust that this project will be successful. I remind myself not to worry about what happens after the first 100 bags are filled. One step at a time….. the future will be what it is. So far my supporters have never let me down and the funding and supplies are always there when I need them.

One project I want to explore is writing some grants to help with funding the Go Bags. I know there is money out there, I just need to connect to it.

Kathy and I are going to meet the Trainer at the gym tomorrow morning at 9:00. I think taking Kathy three times a week to the gym will be good for both of us. I will be much more likely to go if I feel the need to take Kathy. My legs and arms have gotten weak and I need to build them back up again. I also need to either walk the treadmill or ride a bike every time I go in addition to doing some resistance work on my legs and arms.

I will probably go to Costco Friday. We need a new vacuum and I have a list of other things I need. I have no plans for the weekend but Costco is too busy to go on the weekends.

We had quite the storm last night. Lots of rain, lightning, and thunder. We still have standing water in our yard today so know we got at least 2 inches of rain. I welcome the rain.

In November Nicole and I are going to do a river cruise on the Danube. They have been in a severe drought and most of the cruises have turned into bus tours as the river is too low for the boats to go down. Trusting they are receiving some rain too! I would much prefer to sleep in the same bed for 10 days rather than ride a bus and have a new hotel to check into every day.

It has been delightful having another empty space day. I feel my body, soul and spirit linking back up again and being in the same place at the same time. I need lots of quiet time to allow that to happen.

Grateful for baby steps being taken for the Go Bag project, grateful for a compassionate vet, and grateful the get fit project begins tomorrow.

Kathy and I had a productive trip to Emporia today. On the way out of town, I stopped at the bank and deposited two checks. Then I went to the Post Office and opened a PO Box for Love in Action. It costs $112 a year to rent a box. I am going to have to put a reminder on my calendar so I go to the post office a couple times a week to check the box.

We went to Emporia. First stop was to take my car through the car wash. I had lots of bug splatters from the trip to KC last Friday.

Then I went to the medical supply store to pick up my six month allotment of supplies for my CPAP machine. I could get some of them but I had gotten the three month allotment on the 24th of the month and they couldn’t give me the next set of supplies until the 25th of this month. Geez! I decided to just wait and get everything at once so I get to go back next week and pick them up.

Then we went to the Verizon store. Kathy has an Android phone that keeps picking up a virus and all she gets when she does anything is ads. The nice man at the store removed all the virus and then he deleted most of the apps on the phone. All she can use her phone for now is to make and receive phone calls and to text. She has a tablet that she can get on-line and pay her bills and play her games. Her tablet doesn’t seem to pick up a virus like her phone does. The guy also blocked Kathy from being able to add apps so maybe her phone will stay virus free. She forgets she isn’t to add apps and this way she won’t be able to. Hope she doesn’t get frustrated trying to add one. We may need to go to Plan B if she does.

We then went to Walmart and got some groceries. We had a hard time finding what we want as they are still remodeling and everything is out of place. Kathy wanted something and we asked a couple different people. No one seemed too interested in helping her find what she wanted. Finally found an employee that understood what Kathy wanted and she took Kathy to where they should be but they were out of them.

I wanted a package of hot dogs so I can give Roxy her pills. All they had out was a package of 40. She won’t take that many pills! The lady that was working there said she had just pulled the others and taken them to the back. She didn’t offer to go get some for us.

The lady that helped Kathy find what she was looking for pointed out some smaller packages of hot dogs that were in a different location and I was able to get a package.

We came home after that. I got the groceries put away. I didn’t get a bunch of stuff today but at least have some basic things again.

I worked on the Love in Action Go Bag project this afternoon. I have had three offers of places to store the materials so decided to go ahead and get some things put on the Amazon gift registry as well as put together a bulk order for the items I am getting from a company. I haven’t pushed the order button yet but I got a quote and am going to sit on it for a day and then probably proceed.

I ordered some items in bulk that we will probably get from some drives that people are going to be doing. But I have a feeling, we are going to need way more than 100 Go Bags once we start passing them out. Since I have space, I would like to get ahead on what we have on hand.

A dear friend of mine called me this morning. He works at an insurance company that has a matching gifts program of some sort. He and his wife are making a generous donation to Love in Action and he has requested the matching funds. He was notified that his gift qualified and he called today to let me know almost $2,000 will be coming my way, probably in November.

That gift felt like a sign to get things ordered. I wanted to have $5,000 on hand before I ordered anything as that is what it will cost if I end up having to buy all the materials directly and others don’t order from the gift registry. With this new gift that is coming, I will have $5,000 on hand.

I still may need to raise lots and lots more if the first 100 bags go quickly. It is hard to know what the response will be. I may also end up with 100 bags and no one requests them. It will all sort itself out in time and I have found through this project that the universe has a better sense of timing for all this to come together than I do.

I need to make a post and let the supporters of Love in Action know that I put a bunch of items on the Released Detainee Support Gift Registry. I need to change the name of the registry though as the people the Go Bags are going to are not released, they are being deported.

This little project just keeps on going. I wonder where it will be even six months from now. If the Go Bags are much requested, I will need to start looking for some big gifts and grants to help fund them.

Nothing on the calendar for the rest of the week. It was nice to get some errands run today and a few things crossed off my to-do list. I will need to go to Costco later this week and get a new vacuum and pick up a few things. I’ll see what the weather does and how things are going and pick a day and go.

I’m tired tonight. I had trouble falling asleep last night for some reason. I slept in a bit this morning but had trouble waking up when I got up. My energy level is rather low tonight. I feel like my body, mind and spirit are scattered and I need lots of quiet time so all of me gets in the same space at the same time.

Grateful for the errands I got done today, grateful for the gift that is coming for Love in Action, and grateful for the quiet days ahead for me.

Happy birthday to my oldest daughter Michelle. How has it been 46 years since you were born? Time goes by so fast. I love how you embrace life and stay true to who you are. So proud of you and so grateful you made me a grandmother of two.

Went to Topeka for a doctor’s appointment today. I got to Topeka early enough that I could have lunch before my appointment. Of course I went to Chipotle. It cost more than normal so I checked the receipt and they had charged me for cheese that I didn’t get. I pointed it out to them and they refunded it.

Went to my appointment which took 1 1/2 hours. Hadn’t planned on being there that long. Finally got done and headed home. I stopped at Walmart to get some groceries but there was no parking except by the gas station. It was 100 degrees today and I was getting cranky and decided I didn’t want to walk that far in the heat and deal with that many people inside. For the safety of others and myself, I came home instead. I will have to go to town soon and get some groceries as the bare essentials are running out.

When I got home I discovered Kathy was having trouble with the vacuum. Not sure why it isn’t working properly. It it already broken so if I tear it apart to see what is wrong I can’t break it more. When I am not so cranky I will attempt to see if I can find out what is wrong. If not, I will go to Costco later this week and get a new one. This one is only a little over two years old. Man, they don’t make things like they used to.

I finally have some breathing space as I don’t have anything on my calendar for the next ten days or so. I really need to get myself organized for the Go Bag project and this will give me the time and space to do so. I need lots of quiet space to make some decisions about the program and figure out a timeline. It will be easy once I sort through all the pros and cons in my head and then decide on a path forward. The good news is no matter what I decide it won’t be a wrong path. I am usually good at adjusting the path as needed once I set out. It is when I don’t make a choice and set out that I can run into problems.

Kathy and I have decided to start going to the gym again. I need an accountability partner and if I go so Kathy can go I think I will go more often. Kathy needs someone to help her with her routine there as she will forget it easily. Maybe together we can do a hard thing and get our asses to the gym three times a week.

I just looked at the early Emmy Red Carpet looks. I am out of touch as I don’t recognize most of the names of the people they are showing. I think I need to get out more – then again, maybe not. There are some people that are paid way too much in comparison to the valve they offer society and I consider actors in that group. Sports players are another group that is way over paid for the value they bring society.

Man it feels good to not have anything on my calendar but empty space for the next ten days. I’m sure some days will fill up with things but it feels like it has been a hot minute since I saw nothing but empty space on my calendar. My soul needs someone breathing space and I look forward to it.

Grateful for a safe trip to and from Topeka today, grateful for another chance to eat at Chipotle, and grateful for the empty space ahead.

This day didn’t go as planned but it turned out great. Michelle and Ellexia were going to come out and help Kathy and I eat the pan of lasagna I had purchased from a neighbor. She had made the lasagna as a fundraiser for a golf thing. I took it out of the freezer yesterday so it could thaw so I could bake it today.

Nicole and Geoff called around 9:30. They had been in Winfield at the Bluegrass Festival and were on their way home. They wanted to know if I wanted to join them for lunch on their way through Emporia.

Kathy, Michelle, Ellexia and I met them at Radius and had lunch together. I love when I get to see a couple of my family together. We had a delightful lunch. I stopped on the way home and filled the car with gas and then we came home.

I baked the lasagna this afternoon. I put out a text to my gang of friends and offered them some of it. Two of them took me up on the offer. One came by and picked hers up this afternoon and the other is coming tomorrow afternoon. We have enough lasagna left for another meal for Kathy and I. It was too good to have lots of leftovers that we couldn’t eat so I shared.

I also baked a pumpkin pie cake this afternoon. The cool and rain we had this morning made me think of fall and pumpkin. Pumpkin spice is one of Kathy’s favorite things and she has had a hard week and deserved a special treat. Those that got some lasagna also got some of that as Kathy and I can’t (or rather shouldn’t) eat a whole pan of pumpkin pie cake.

Haven’t done much else today. I am tired tonight as I did manage to find some sleep last night. The sharp lightening and loud thunder woke me up this morning. Am grateful for the rain we got. There is a chance we will get more rain this week.

Am sitting with the Go Bag project and trying to come up with a master plan. Pieces of it are falling into place. Tuesday or Wednesday I hope to sit down and map out the plan. I am trying to time when I want things to come in and when we might be able to start packing bags. We will be running into the holidays shortly after I get home from my trip so wondering if I want to get it done before then. Decisions, decisions, decisions. Good thing is I don’t think there is a wrong decision – just different choices with different consequences.

Tomorrow I have to be in Topeka for a 12:30 doctor’s appointment. I will have lunch in Topeka. It will depend on what time I wake up and get going whether I eat before my appointment or after. Not sure how long the appointment will last but betting about an hour.

I need to stop and get a few groceries on my way back through Emporia. I was going to stop today but couldn’t make myself. With gas as expensive as it is getting, I really need to make myself do it tomorrow and save myself a trip to town later this week.

The rest of the week is empty space. I feel like I really could use that. I have lots of planning to do for the Go Bag project and need quiet space to do that in. Hoping to get the website updated some time soon also. I need to write out what changes I need made so the designer has those when he is ready for them.

A young man that graduated from high school in Chase County stepped forward last night and volunteered to do the website changes for me. He is the CEO of a nonprofit in Washington, DC and understands the world of nonprofits and technology. I am ever so grateful for him.

Two of his friends are friends of mine so I sent the two friends a quick note last night to check him out. Both gave him glowing reviews. I needed to send the password to my website to him and wanted to make sure he was who he said he was before I did that. Intuitively I knew I could trust him but needed to do my due diligence.

Still sitting with a family drama situation. It took another turn today. Not sure how things are going to get resolved. There is a person I can reach out to that might be helpful. It has gotten too big for me to handle alone. Dang, this stuff can be hard.

I have sensed another big energy shift in the world. Chaos seems to be building but also peace. Hard to find words to explain what I am feeling. I got the strong reminder to ground, stay true to who I am, stay focused on my inner work, and all will be well. I haven’t read much of the news this week as I felt like I had enough chaos swirling around me without adding that to it. All is well and all will be well. May it be so. Amen and Amen.

Grateful for time with Nicole, Michelle, Ellexia, Geoff and Kathy today, grateful for friends that helped me by taking some leftovers, and grateful all is well and will be well.

I had just gotten to sleep last night around midnight when Roxy barked and woke me up. We had tried to keep her inside all night so her incision would stay cleaner. She decided it was time to join Sophia outside. I got up and took her out but she wasn’t interested in a walk. She wanted to be put in the pen. I was tired and cranky and wasn’t going to argue with her. She is the most stubborn dog I have ever seen.

Struggle to go back to sleep after all that. Finally made it back to sleep around 4:00 and then woke up around 7:30 and couldn’t sleep any more. Not much sleep last night!

I am still in my pajamas if that tells you what type of day I have had. I forgot to get dressed this morning when I got up and just realized it when I got ready to write this. Too late in the day to change now and I have no plans to go anywhere.

My tummy has not played nice today. Haven’t felt my best all day. I think I needed a quiet day at home and one with no expectations on me. I’m sure by tomorrow all will be well.

Kathy got her Covid and flu shots today. We shall see how she is feeling tomorrow. I am always down for the count with the Covid shot from one of the brands but the other brand doesn’t bother me. Not sure which brand she got and what her experience will be. I am going to wait to get mine until mid October. I want the maximum protection for my trip early November.

Technology hasn’t played nice with me today either. A couple times I just had to walk away from it and try again another time. Wish I knew more sometimes but not bad enough to make myself learn it. Most times I can play around enough and finally figure out how to do something. The only problem is, I forget how I did it and can’t do it again without issues.

Need to do some work on the Go Bag project. I don’t feel too organized yet and need to get it together so I can share more details with others. It is hard for me to keep posts short enough people will read it. I tend to give too much information and people don’t read all the details. I do a lot of repetition via emails, comments and PM.

I posted today asking for a volunteer to help with the website. I got several phone calls, texts and emails from companies that do website design. Not sure how they saw the post as they are not members of Love in Action. For only $1,500 they would be happy to assist. Yikes! I would have been more impressed with them if they had taken the time to look at our existing website before they asked me for details about Love in Action. Some of them were very persistent with their requests.

One day soon I am sure someone will present themselves as a website designer and media expert and volunteer to make flyers, add the changes I need to the website, etc. People are asking me for media things I have no idea what they are or how to do them. They want specific formats and I have no idea what they are talking about.

Still trying to figure out when to post the needs for the Go Bags on the Detainee Support Gift Registry. I don’t want things showing up before the end of October and have a feeling if I list things now, they will come in too soon. We aren’t going live with the Go Bags until December 1. People are already wanting to organize parties to help fill the bags, etc. Guess I better get organized so I can book people in. I think we will need people to wash and sort things too.

I have one group lined up to do a sock drive. Another group want to do a drive but hasn’t decided on what item they want to collect.

Sure would be easier if I had an idea of how fast we will go through 100 Go Bags. I don’t want to overstock supplies if they aren’t used very much. I will continue to listen for inner intuition guidance and go from there.

Still sorting through the family drama too. A decision was reached today that at least gives me an idea of which way this is going. Not sure it will calm the drama down though. We may be getting a mediator involved to see if we can calm things down. Dang, this stuff can get hard.

All the drama is probably why my tummy is cranky today. I have been emotionally upset most of the week. I get myself calmed down and then another thing happens and off I go again. Have some work to do on myself to be able to stay calm in the midst of the storm around me. I do much better than I used to do so I will call that progress. Perfection is not required in this life!

Grateful for a pajama day, grateful I can put things down for the day and give myself a day of rest, and grateful for the interest in the Go Bag project and willingness of others to help out.

Kathy and I headed for her appointment at the Memory Care Clinic of KU at 10:20. We stopped at the Pome on the Range but was disappointed to find they are not open. I wonder if they will open this season? It didn’t look like they are going to.

We got to her appointment and got checked in. The nurse called us back before 12:30. She checked us in and then the doctor came in shortly after the nurse was done.

He is a strange dude but we had fun with him. I won’t share Kathy’s results as that is her story to tell. The funny parts were when he asked Kathy who the current president was. Her response was the turd and then was able to come up with Trump.

Found out the doctor is a Democrat so we had a fun discussion about that. I shared about Love in Action and he encouraged me to keep trying to change people’s hearts and minds and he would do the same.

At one point Kathy told the doctor that I repeated myself on the way up here. I told the doctor I passed my memory test at my physical and he said well you don’t have Alzheimer’s yet! He said it is hereditary. Geez thanks guy!

He made a few recommendations that he wants me to start doing for her. He is adjusting some of her medication. Overall, it was a good appointment. She will see his PA in six months and then the doctor again in a year.

We stopped at Chipotle and had lunch and then went to Emporia to pick up Roxy. The Vet Clinic was very busy so had a bit of a wait to get her. They didn’t charge me for the overnight stay. We got Roxy and her meds and came home.

When we got home Roxy was so anxious to get out of the car that she tried to crawl into the front seat to follow Kathy out of the car. She got stuck. We had to adjust the seats and help lift her up so she could get out of the car. I about peed my pants laughing at her.

Sophia was glad to see her mama. Roxy is to stay inside until her stitches come out in two weeks. Don’t think that will happen as Roxy does not always like to stay inside. We shall see how this goes.

Someone from a group contacted me about doing a sock drive at their meetings that are coming up. That will be a budget saver if they can come up with 100 pairs of socks. Hoping other groups will step forward for the T-shirts, underwear and sports bras. They could even do the sweat pants and hoodies if they can follow the no draw strings rule.

Am grateful I have the next two days at home. I am tired tonight. Traffic was heavy coming home. I told Kathy I was tired of seeing car asses. I didn’t have many clear stretches the whole way home. Grateful we had a safe trip to and from.

No plans for the weekend. I have some things I could work on for Love in Action but I need to put things down for a bit and give myself a break. I have to go to Topeka Monday for a doctor’s appointment and will pick up Love in Action again next Tuesday.

The rest of next week is empty space which I need. It has felt busy again to me and I do best when things are a bit slower. We have had some family drama going on this week that drained me. Hoping that all will settle down soon too.

Next week I need to get some things organized for the Go Bags. I have lots of ideas and feel a bit scattered. Need to make some decisions and firm up some proposals. It will all fall into place. I have over two months before I committed to passing out the bags. I will be gone for 16 days of that but I should have everything in place long before my trip.

The Doctor made our over hour long visit fun today. He had a sense of humor and played a bit with us. He was matter of fact and direct which I like. He had a solution for one of our problems which I also appreciated. We shall see how things shake out from here.

Grateful for a positive doctor appointment today, grateful for a sock drive that is being organized and grateful I get to stay home for two days.

I went to bed before 9:00 last night and actually fell asleep rather quickly. Unfortunately, I woke up at 1:00 and couldn’t go back to sleep. It has been a long day.

I took Roxy to the Vet this morning for her surgery. They called a little before noon and let me know all is well and that I could pick her up after 4:00 this afternoon.

Kathy and I drove in, paid the jaw dropping $600 bill, and then found out that Roxy wasn’t able to walk yet as she was still sleepy. They gave me the option of carrying my 93 pound dog or picking her up tomorrow.

We are going to KC in the morning for Kathy’s doctor’s appointment and won’t be home to watch Roxy during the day. I told them I couldn’t get her in the morning so they are going to let us pick her up on our way back through town late afternoon. We may have to skip Costco if the doctor’s appointment takes more than an hour or so. We shall see what happens.

Sophia, our other dog, has been a bit lost today without her mama here. She came in for a bit but wanted back outside.

We had quite the thunderstorm roll through during the night. The lightning and thunder was intense at times. Grateful for what rain we did get.

Got a big donation for Love in Action today as well as several others. It is so gratifying to see the support for the Go Bags and that we are getting donations from new donors. The big donation today came from a first time donor. We have gained almost 200 new members in our Love in Action Facebook group this week.

Got six thank you notes written and in the mail box today. I forgot to go down to the post office and open a PO Box though. I will do that next week.

After I dropped Roxy off at the Vet this morning, I met Jason for breakfast. He has some family drama going on too and it was nice to touch base with him. We both shared our issues. Somehow it helps to have someone else listen to my woes. It always seems to lighten the load.

When I got home from the trip to Emporia this morning I took a short nap. Didn’t get much sleep but it took the rough edge off my day. I am getting sleep deprived again.

Trying to figure out how much to share about the Go Bags on the Facebook page. People are so generous and want to help but sometimes their help is not what I can use and they struggle to accept no. I have many rules and restrictions I have to follow. I have never sat down and written them all out as I don’t think most people need to know or even care and probably wouldn’t read it anyways.

I also don’t want to get too aggressive in placing items on the wish list as I know they will get ordered shortly after I place them on the wish list and I don’t have a storage place ironed out for sure yet. We aren’t going to start distributing the Go Bags until the first of December and there is no use getting all the stuff here when we don’t need it for over two months. I need to make sure the funds are there to support the project first, and then I will take the next step.

After my doctor’s appointment next Monday in Topeka I will have lots of empty space and give the Go Bags project my full attention and get some next steps worked out. Hopefully by then my own family drama will be turned down to a low roar and I will get caught up on sleep and will be able to focus on the Go Bags.

Next week I need to get the website changes that I am going to make drafted out and have a conversation with my website designer. His family had their own drama and he has been a bit missing in action as a result. I may need to find a volunteer that can handle that part of this project for me. Any ideas on who I could ask?

Life sure is showing me these days to not get too fixed on anything as more than likely things will change. Certainly is not something the Universe offers us. Sometimes things change so quickly I feel a bit whip lashed as a result trying to keep up. Forecasting what may or may not happen is getting to be pointless though. Reminding myself to stay present to what is seems to be the best thing I can do for myself right now.

Grateful Roxy’s surgery went well, grateful I had the funds to pay the bill, and grateful for time with Jason today.

I met with the Sheriff and new Captain of the Detention Center this morning. We covered a lot of issues and it was a productive meeting.

I had some generic questions I asked and got answers for. We had a conversation about phone calls. They are going to explore allowing us to provide phone cards to the Detainees as our special monthly event at Christmas time and for those that are newly arrived to the Center.

We had a long discussion about the Go Bags. They have a storage issue at the Center and don’t think they can store 30 bags. But, we did come up with an alternative. The Detainees are told when they process in that if they get deported a family member can bring them a suitcase of up to 40 pounds of allowed goods. Some don’t have family that can provide that.

The Center will put the Love in Action contact information in the packet of information and the Detainees can pass it on to their family and they will contact us and ask us to provide a Go Bag for a departing detainee. That way the Center only has what will actually be used on hand.

We will put together a standard, basic bag of a toiletry kit appropriate for the sex of the detainee, a change of clothes including underwear and socks, a phone charger, a pencil and pad of paper, and a blanket, Families can send additional items or request additional items be added. We will put all this in a backpack.

We are going to gather supplies for 100 of them and go from there. I have no idea how many might be requested. I told the Center we would attempt to have them ready to go by the first of December. I am going to be gone for 16 days in November and won’t be able to take bags up to the Center during that time. That will also allow us time to gather the supplies and organize ourselves. Some of the items have to be standardized which means Love in Action has to bulk order them and supply them. Other things can be donated such as socks, charger cords, etc. If Love in Action bought everything, it will cost about $5,000 for the whole bag. Lots of fundraising to do!

Kathy and I gathered up the appreciation bags and delivered them to the Center this afternoon. The Sheriff’s department posted a nice thank you on their Facebook page. Good to have them out of the house and that project completed. I still need to organize my house again but didn’t get that done today.

I didn’t sleep last night. Had a bit of family drama last night and couldn’t sleep last night. Things are still a bit unsettled but a bit better today. I think a major change is in the works and not sure yet when it will happen. Life is a constant state of change so it is my reminder to myself to go with it however it turns out.

Tomorrow I have to get up early and have Roxy at the Vet no later than 8:30. I don’t like early mornings but hoping I crash fairly early tonight and can get up and going in the morning. I need to remember to go out and pick up the dog’s food bowl before I go to bed as Roxy can’t eat anything after 10:00 tonight.

Friday I am going to KC to take Kathy to the Memory Care Clinic at KU. We have a couple things to do while we are in town if we aren’t too fried after the appointment.

Thank heavens the weekend is empty space. Monday I have to go to Topeka for a doctor’s appointment. The rest of the week looks fairly quiet. I will need the time to organize the fundraiser and donation drives for Love in Action.

Have already received several donations from my generous supporters. I have lots of thank you notes I need to take care of yet this week. I am a bit behind on them.

I really felt the different timelines or living in different realities last night and today. We can’t hear each other even though words are being said. When someone is on a different timeline that happens. The best I can do is set my boundaries and then take care of myself. It is painful though and hard to see someone get caught in the middle of all of it.

Grateful to get the green light for the Go Bags in a modified version, grateful for all the cooperation the Center gives me, and grateful the donations have already started coming in.

Last night one of my Pen Pal Volunteers sent me a story about the Pen Pal she has been writing to for several months. I asked her if she could put what happened into a story and she sent it to me. She did an excellent job writing the story. I did remove the last name of the Pen Pal to protect her privacy and then posted the story on our Love in Action Facebook page.

It has been viewed over 1,000 times so far and I’m sure that number will continue to climb. This story involves a lady that can’t be deported back to her home country as it is too dangerous. She has been moved to Louisiana which means she is waiting for another country to accept her and then she will be deported to a country she has never been in before. She will leave behind an 8 year old son, a 20 year old daughter and her husband.

Stories like this take all my energy and leave me in deep despair for a bit. I just can’t quite wrap my head around what we are doing as a nation and why so many people support these actions.

She did mention in her story how important it was to this family that the lady was able to send home notes to her family and the drawings she had made. Without Love in Action that would not have been possible. However, it still seems insignificant in the bigger picture.

Sometimes I have something like this hit me in the face and I wonder what I am doing organizing Go Bags in light of all that the deportees face. Yet it is something so I keep doing it. One drop in the ocean feels not enough sometimes. Yet I know I can’t stop as something is better than nothing.

Went to the Vo-Tech to have my teeth cleaned. For a beginning second year student, she did a good job. I got there at 12:30 and didn’t get out until 3:00. My teeth were really bad again. I have an appointment to go back in December and hoping that one won’t take so long. I am a plaque overachiever! My mouth is smaller than normal and my teeth are crowded together. The student got a good workout today trying to remove all the plaque in tight spaces.

I didn’t sleep much last night which isn’t unusual after a night where I got lots of sleep. I sure could take a nap right now but will do my best to stay up and go to bed fairly early.

Tomorrow I have my meeting with the Staff at the Detention Center to see if the Go Bag project is a go. I have several other things to discuss with them too. Fingers crossed it is a go!

I got two books of stamps today in the mail. I always appreciate getting stamps as it is a huge budget saver.

Thursday Roxy has her surgery so I will probably make two trips to town to take her and then go get her. I guess there is a chance she will have to spend the night but we shall see.

Friday I take Kathy to the KU Memory Care Unit for her annual check-up. I am meeting someone to pick up a box of collected donations for Love in Action, and we will also make a Costco stop.

Thankfully the weekend is free and full of empty space. Monday I have to go to Topeka for a doctor’s appointment.

I didn’t get the bags taken to the Center today. It was too hot to make eight trips to the car to load the car and then eight trips to unload it. It is to be a bit cooler tomorrow so will probably take them up tomorrow afternoon. It will be good to have space in my living room and dining room again after they are gone.

Still feeling a bit empty after reading the letter from last night. I give myself permission to allow all the feels and sometimes that can take a bit. Once I do that, I normally can refill myself fairly quickly. I don’t want to go into the meeting tomorrow not filled but that isn’t always something I can control.

Grateful my teeth are cleaned, grateful for the Pen Pal Volunteers, and grateful for the two books of stamps.

Wow! How did it get to be the 7th of September already? Time is flying by right now.

This has been a low energy day for me. I slept in this morning so it has been a short day for me. Not sure how it got to be evening time already though. Time does go by regardless of what one is doing or not doing.

I sure didn’t do much today. As usual when I finally get sleep, I feel more tired that day than if I hadn’t gotten much. Sure could take a nap but know that isn’t a good idea to do that this late in the day. Hopefully when I do go to bed tonight, I will get sleep again. One could get used to sleeping more than two hours a night.

Tomorrow morning I want to take the gift bags up to the Detention Center if I get up early enough. I have to leave for Emporia before noon for my dental cleaning at the Vo-Tech in the afternoon. I got some boxes out of the shed but I can’t really fit many gift bags in them so guess I will just carry them as they are. I can carry about ten at a time fairly easily. We put together 80 of them so that is 8 trips. I can do that.

Wednesday I have a meeting with the top dogs at the Center to have a discussion about the go bags. Not sure if I will get a definitive answer or not. Sure hoping so. If this project is a go, I would like to get started on it. We probably won’t start supplying them until I get home from my trip in November. But things might come in quicker than I anticipate and I can find someone to take bags up to them three times a week. We shall see how this plays out or even if we get to play.

Roxy has surgery on Thursday. I usually can bring her home the same day. We shall see if that is what happens this time. She licks her sore teat all the time. Not sure how we prevent that after surgery.

Friday I take Kathy to KC for her appointment at the KU Memory Care Unit. Not sure how long this appointment will last. I am betting they will do a short memory test on her to see her progression since last year. Last time I think we were there about an hour. Afterwards we will go to lunch and make a stop at Costco. We are also going to meet up with someone that has a box of things for Love in Action.

Thankfully, the weekend looks empty. The following Monday I have to go to Topeka for an appointment. Then maybe my out-of-town trips can come to a stop. It will be fourteen weeks in a row of at least one out-of-town trip if not two in the same week. That is more than I usually do in a year.

Not sure this has felt like a holiday weekend to me. Funny how when you are retired all the days feel about the same. Holidays don’t hold the same feelings as they did when I worked. September means the Christmas holidays aren’t far behind. Yuck!

Found some small paper bags that will hold the Halloween treats for the detainees and got them ordered. I can’t use plastic and they can’t have handles so they were a bit tricky to find some. It will make the job of the person that hands them out much easier if the treats are bagged and ready to go. One of these days when I go to Emporia, I need to go to the Mexican grocery stores and find the candy I am looking for. They will get a mix of Mexican candy and chocolate candies.

Need to talk to the staff tomorrow to determine what we want to do for Thanksgiving and Christmas this year for the detainees. I want to push the phone call thing for Christmas and possibly having a diner catered for Thanksgiving. We can always do pizza again but I would love to do more of a feast.

If the Go Bag project doesn’t get approved, I will have some quiet time for Love in Action for a bit. We have enough funds to do Christmas and Thanksgiving without raising more funds. Part of me needs that quiet time but I also would love to get started with the Go Bag project too. We shall see what happens.

Feeling a bit small today. There is some stuff going on that I am not sure how to handle. It will work itself out. No one has a crystal ball and can tell me how. My opinion wasn’t asked for so will use this as a chance to practice patience and self-control. I will have to live with the consequences of the situation but I will deal with that when it happens.

Grateful for a very quiet day at home, grateful I can allow myself to have a do-nothing type of day, and grateful for lots of sleep last night.

Sure doesn’t feel like a Sunday to me. I was surprised when I read the day of the week on my iPad just now. Not sure what day I think it should be, just hasn’t felt like a Sunday.

My gang showed up for me today and we had 80 gift bags stuffed and tied up in less than 30 minutes. Oh my! What a back saver that was for me. Afterwards we sat and visited for a bit and caught up on each other and what is going on. We are all getting to be of an age where these bodies of ours are slowly breaking down. Some have really been through the wringer lately.

Now I need to find some boxes and figure out how to get the bags to the Detention Center. I will find some boxes tomorrow and then take them up to the Center Tuesday morning. It is so nice to have that project almost completed.

Haven’t done much else today. I had to run to the store twice today as I forgot something the first time. I attempted taking a nap twice today and didn’t find much sleep either time. Felt good to rest for a bit though. My tummy is doing its naughty thing this evening. Haven’t taken anything for it yet but have a feeling I should.

No plans for tomorrow other than boxing up the bags. I have some housecleaning to do. It is starting to bother me a bit. I should have cleaned before the gang came over but I am long past the stage of being concerned what they think about my housecleaning skills.

Tuesday I will deliver the bags in the morning and then I have a dental cleaning at the Vo-Tech in the afternoon. It usually takes a couple hours for them to do their thing as it is a student program.

Wednesday I have the meeting with the Detention Center that I hopes gives me the green light to proceed with the Go Bag idea. If I get the green light, I doubt we will be ready for distribution until the first part of December. I will need to raise a bunch of money first and give others the opportunity to participate with donations of socks, underwear, etc. Have another possibility for a storage space offered to me today so will see where that goes.

Thursday Roxy has her surgery. She has been good about taking her pills. I stuff them into a good size piece of hot dog and she has taken them right down. Sophia always gets a little bite of hot dog too. I will probably have to make two trips to town that day. She has to be at the Vet no later than 8:30.

Friday I am taking Kathy to the memory care clinic of KU in KC. I am meeting up with someone to collect a box of things they have already collected for the Go Bag project. We will also make a stop at Costco.

Luckily, the weekend is free and empty at this point. The next week looks a lot quieter so far but if the Go Bags are a go it may fill up quick.

Sitting in gratitude for my tribe today. It was fun putting the bags together with all the help. They made a job that might have taken me all day get done in less than 30 minutes. I am so lucky to have these friends in my life and that they dropped whatever they had planned for today to come and show up with eager hands and hearts wide open.

Grateful for my friend’s help today, grateful the bags are all assembled, and grateful for a quiet day tomorrow.

I went to Emporia early afternoon to pick up some groceries and a prescription that was ready. I also picked up two prescriptions for Kathy. She has trouble remembering to pick them up.

I sent out an SOS to a group of my friends to see if anyone would be available to come help stuff the gift bags for the detention center staff. I think all of them are going to be able to come except maybe one. It would be hard to do my life without my friends!

I am working on writing a note and signing the appreciation cards that will go in each gift bag. I think I am close to being half done. I will keep working on them tonight and hopefully finish them up before the gang gets here to stuff the bags.

It shouldn’t take us too long to get them all done. Not sure where I will put them to do them. I have a long table in the shed I can bring in. I think between the dining room table and the long table they will all fit. I will have to find some boxes to put them in so I can get them to the Detention Center next week.

I had some stickers someone had made for the No Kings Rally in Topeka when Love in Action had an informational table. I put one on each of the outside of the bags. Love how those things are available when I need them.

I got some wine today and am going to make a corn dip for tomorrow so we have some munchies while we work. I will run to the Dollar General and get the last two ingredients I need to make the dip and get some corn chips.

It will be a relief to have the gift bags all ready to go. I so appreciate my tribe showing up for me.

I am anxious about the meeting at the Center on Wednesday where I hope to find out if the Go Bags are a go. I am making a list of other questions I have for the top dogs at the Center. Maybe I can get several things accomplished at this meeting.

A lady has a big box of something for me to pick up Friday while I am in KC. Not sure who she got it from other than she said someone(s) did a collection from a list she gave them. Trusting it will be something I can use for the Detainees. If the Go Bags project isn’t a go, I’m not sure where I will store this stuff.

Jason offered his basement if I can’t find another storage/work space. Not sure I want to do steps but at least I know I have a storage/work space if all else fails.

It will be an interesting week next week. Have something everyday on my calendar already. Have a list of other things that need to get done too, especially if the Go Bag project gets approved. I will enjoy Monday as it may be my last real quiet day for a bit.

Need to find someone to update the website. It will become very important if the Go Bag project gets approved. My neighbor boy got home today but I’m sure it will take the family a bit to recover as they have been gone for over a week with the sick girl.

Best get back to finishing up the appreciation notes. I am on a timeline now!

Grateful for my friend’s help tomorrow, grateful for all the possibilities that are coming my way, and grateful to get this gift project finished up.

I left for Topeka at 9:20 this morning. I had to stop and fill up with gas on my way. Gas is about $0.30 a gallon cheaper in Emporia than in Topeka.

Got to the doctor’s office at 10:45 for my 11:00 appointment. They called me back at 10:50. The nurse did her thing and it was only about a five minute wait for the NP to come in.

She did her thing and I was out of there by 11:20. Went to Chipotle for lunch because why not! Ate and then went to Emporia.

I stopped at Dunkin’ and picked up 16 dozen donuts. They had two employees carry them to my car for me while I paid. That was nice!

Stopped at the Detention Center when I got to Cottonwood Falls and it took four trips in to get all the Dunkin’ Donuts in plus the dozen that were low sugar and gluten-free. The lady at the dispatch window recognized me and asked if I needed Heather.

I left before Heather came out and I came home. I wasn’t home too long before I got a pen pal message from one of our pen pals thanking Love in Action for the donuts.

I was tired this afternoon. Kathy nor I found much sleep last night. I laid down three different times and finally got a short nap. Sleep is still in hiding around here.

Found a supplier on-line that sells backpacks, toiletry kits, and blankets for way cheaper than I expected I would be able to find. I have a meeting next Wednesday with the staff at the Center to see if the project is a go. If it is, I will send a request for a bid from the company and go from there. What I want they don’t sell in one package. I have to have the toiletry bags that are approved for air travel and they don’t sell those in a bundle with the other products. Not sure if I will have to buy things individually or if they can package them. Either way, it is way cheaper than I anticipated so it will be a win. Now to find out how much shipping charges are.

No plans for the holiday weekend. The rest of the items for the Staff’s appreciation bags came in so I can start working on those. I would like to take them up when I go for my meeting next Wednesday morning. I have a busy weekend ahead if I decide to push and get them all assembled by then. I am writing a handwritten note on an appreciation card and then have tissue paper to wrap the other goods in the bag and ribbon to tie it shut. That kinda thing is really not my strong suit but will see what happens.

I have something Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday next week so it will be a busy week for me. I’m not used to having something on my calendar every day. If the Go Bags are a go, things are really going to get busy for me.

Grateful the donut project is complete, grateful for a safe trip to and from Topeka, and grateful for three empty space days ahead of me.

This has been a quiet day at home. I did go to the Dollar General to get some hot dogs so I can get Roxy to take her pills. They worked like a charm for her first pills today. We shall see if they continue to work.

I haven’t done much today. I am giving the Go Bag project some energy and thought. I think I will break what we need up and if churches, social groups, etc want to do a collection drive, they can pick one or two items and focus on those. A church could do a sock drive for example. I think that would simplify it and spread out what we collect in a way that won’t cause lots of one thing and nothing of another.

I am writing a letter to the Staff at the Center and requesting a face-to-face meeting with the top officials so we can figure this all out. They still may say no but I want them to do that to my face. They still may say yes too. I would like to get some time before we commit to having the first bags delivered. I will need at least 30 days to get everything set up and find a space for storage and to assemble the bags. It will take some time to find churches and social groups to help too. People from Love in Action are scattered throughout the state of Kansas and beyond. I may be taking more road trips to pick things up!

Tomorrow I have to be in Topeka late morning for a doctor’s appointment. I will stop and have lunch afterwards and then come back to Emporia, stop and pick up the donuts and deliver them to the Center. One more special event will be crossed off the list!

No plans for the holiday weekend. Have things scheduled for three different days next week so it will feel a bit busy for me. I do need to go buy groceries at some point this weekend. I will see when the mood hits to make another trip to town.

It has been a quiet week for me with little interaction with others. My soul needed this time-out. I haven’t done much and had little energy. I have not read much news as I needed to step away for a bit. Feeling a bit isolated but I needed that to let my mind get quiet again. My heart had felt heavy from all the chaos in the world and it was weighing me down. I am no good to any one, including myself, if I allow myself to get below neutral and stay there.

Grateful for hot dogs that make the medicine go down, grateful for quiet time at home, and grateful I finally feel like I have climbed above neutral again.