I got more sleep last night than I have been getting. It has been another hard day though. I think I need to take a break from Love in Action for a bit. I feel like I have been on a roller coaster this last week and have lost my footing and grounding.
I kinda laugh because last time I said I was going to do that and completely surrendered it, I got an email from the Center and the next day I dived back in. Not expecting it to happen that fast again but I am surrendering it completely and won’t pick it back up again until I am clear about my purpose.
Haven’t done much today. I did get my thank you notes written and in the mail box. I sure wish I had mailing addresses for those that donate via VENMO so I could properly acknowledge them too.
Nothing on the calendar until Wednesday when I am doing a presentation on Love in Action in the afternoon. I do need to pick up a couple of prescriptions so might go to town tomorrow and get those. I have a few groceries I need too.
Thursday I have to do my colonoscopy prep and then Friday I have to be in Wichita at 7:30 in the morning. I trust since I only have one prep to do and not two I can make it through without issue. I still don’t know what I need to do the prep with so hoping the information will show up tomorrow so I can pick up what I need.
I really would love to find a solution to my tummy issues. The upper showed some inflammation of the stomach lining but no definite answers as to why. I was pleased that the reflux I am having hasn’t damaged the esophagus yet. I’m also grateful I don’t have an ulcer and that the pancreas isn’t my problem.
The website still isn’t opening on Apple products. The site certificate page says to give it 72 hours to fully come on-line. If it isn’t on-line by Wednesday I will have my neighbor kid fix it for me. I look forward to announcing we have a real website.
I’m grateful we raised extra funds for the pizza party as the website costs more than I expected it to. There are lots of things in the background you have to pay for I didn’t know about. Sometimes I think it is a good thing I don’t know about these things as I wouldn’t have the nerve to jump in and do them if I knew all the details in advance.
Life is a roller coaster at times. I allow myself to fully feel both the ups and the downs and I feel this week I have gotten whiplash from the extremes. Pure joy at helping a released ICE Detainee get released to pure devastation at the situation of the man from Germany who has few good choices and control over his life. Somewhere in all of this is balance. I need to regroup, reset and find that balance point.
I step in and out of acceptance of what Love in Action can and does do. I swing out of acceptance when I see the things that need to be done that are too big for Love in Action to take on. Most of that is policy issues that I can’t change. When I can zoom out and realize what we have been able to do I can find that balance point again. Today, I haven’t been able to.
Grateful I know what I need to do to find balance, grateful I can allow myself to feel the highs and the lows, and grateful I can step aside for a bit and allow balance to find me.