Author: Kay Krause

Another day full of naps, resting and drinking fluids.  I am feeling better but have absolutely no reserve energy.  Walking down to take care of the chickens exhausted me.  It is over 65 out and I sit inside cuddled under a big sweater.  No temperature again today so think I am no longer contagious.  Didn’t make it to the grocery store yet.  Sounds like way too much effort.

Tomorrow I was to go help stuff the Symphony on the Prairie Newsletter.  Haven’t decided it I am going to attempt it or not.  Thinking if I go I would only last an hour or so.  Who knows – maybe tomorrow I will be feeling a lot better again.  I am tons better than I was last Thursday and Friday so on the mend.  Step by step.  Patience, grasshopper, patience.

Tuesday I am to do my first shift of preparing income tax returns.  I will send my leaders a note tomorrow if I am not feeling a lot better and warn them I may not make the full three-hour shift.  At least it is a sit down job and if I don’t have to talk to much I might be able to make the whole three hours.

Have a leak under one of the bathroom sinks in the master bathroom.  The faucet needs replaced due to another issue.  When I feel better I will go to town and get two new ones and then call the plumber to have him come replace them.  Hoping the leak will be fixed with replacing the faucet.  Seems like it is always something that needs fixed around here.

It was a Spring like day on the prairie today.  No worries though as winter is to return in two or three days.  The cats have been outside all day enjoying the sunshine and warmth.  It is cloudy and reminds me of a rainy spring day.  The wind was in a hurry this afternoon although it seems to be calming down this evening.

I hit a new low on weight this morning.  I lost three pounds yesterday.  I tried to eat more today – so far I have eaten three times and will eat one more meal this evening.  I really didn’t want to lose anymore weight but when I get sick I tend not to eat.  Nothing really tastes good and I get tired after I eat.

Haven’t accomplished a thing again today.  Good thing I didn’t have anything that had to be done as I doubt it would have gotten done.  Just don’t have the energy to do anything.  I can’t remember being this drained for a long time.  Nap, rest, eat, nap, rest, eat seems to be all I can do today.

Grateful for a taste of spring today, I am so ready for full ponds and green pastures, grateful I am recovering and my temperature has stayed normal today, and grateful for all the love and concern others have expressed.  Your prayers and cares have helped me kick this shit out of my system.  Thanks!

Feeling a bit better today.  Still sleeping more than I am awake.  I managed to wash, fold and put away two loads of laundry today as well as load and unload the dishwasher.  Man!  I was productive today!  Ha!

Went down this afternoon to do chicken chores.  Came back to the house with a chill.  Finally took a hot bath to get warmed up.  I haven’t run a temperature today so am thinking by tomorrow I should be good to go – slowly.  I put on a pair of Tagen’s sweat pants after my bath.  They fit nicely.  He is outgrowing them.  May have to ask him to give me his old ones that are getting too small for him.

Th wind has finally calmed down a bit.  It was in a bit of a hurry when I was out earlier.  I considered walking down to get the mail but thought better of it.  Just walking down to do the chickens wore me out.  Figured I wasn’t ready to walk a half-mile to get the mail.  Maybe tomorrow I will be ready to do so.

As I put Vic’s Vapor Rub on my feet I thought of my mother tonight.  She always treated our colds with a humidifier tent and greased us up with Vic’s.  I can still feel her cold hands rubbing it into my chest.  She would bring me a cup of hot tea sweetened with sugar.  Dad would bring me warmed bourbon to cut a cough.  The smell of it was enough to make me stop coughing.

Today was Jason’s step-mother’s Celebration of Life Ceremony.  I was sorry to have to miss it.  I didn’t want to take a chance that someone would catch this crud from me.  Not sure I had the strength to drive, park and walk either.  I talked to Jason this morning for a bit.  Trusting it was a grand ceremony that honored a beautiful soul that is gone too soon from this world.

The sun just disappeared from the horizon in the west.  Oh how I love watching the sun set every night.  There is a beautiful after-glow tonight with a pink rim around the entire horizon.

Thinking it is almost bed time for me.  It is only 5:50 but I didn’t take an afternoon nap today.  I got up this morning, ate breakfast and went back to bed for three hours.  My body is craving sleep and allowing me to get lots of sleep.  Wonder why it doesn’t do that when I am not sick?

Got frustrated with myself for a bit this afternoon.  I am already tired of not having any energy and not feeling well.  I sure wouldn’t make a very good long-term patient.  Tomorrow I will start pushing myself a bit and see how I respond.

Trusting tomorrow I will have turned the corner on this crud and start feeling better for longer periods of time.  I will have to ration my energy next week so I don’t overdo.

Grateful for a beautiful spring-like day on the prairie, grateful for my grandson’s sweat pants that fit me, and grateful healing is happening in my body.

I am feeling a bit better today although I don’t have much energy.  I did go to the doctor this morning.  I have a virus so not much he can do for me.  I did get something to help calm my cough.  My stomach hurts from coughing so much.  I haven’t had much of an appetite.  I did manage to get a cup of soup down this afternoon.

Went out to do chicken chores after my nap this afternoon.  It is absolutely beautiful outside.  I drove down to pick up my mail as I didn’t think I had enough energy to walk down and back.  No wind and mid 50’s.  Supposed to be even warmer tomorrow.

My temperature has stayed below 100 today.  Thinking by Monday I will be on the road to recovery.  The doctor did say I may have a rough weekend.  All I feel like doing is sitting or sleeping.  I am working to drink a lot of fluids even though food doesn’t sound good right now.

Being sick always humbles me a bit.  I take my good health for granted sometimes and having a set back like this always catches me a bit off guard.  Trusting this crud will pass quickly and I will be back to my normal level of physical activity soon.  I am a bit encouraged that today has been better than yesterday.

When I was in town I was going to stop and pick up a few groceries but after going to the doctor and the pharmacy I was worn out and came home.  Maybe tomorrow or Sunday I will feel I can handle walking through the grocery store.  I have plenty of food on hand – just not a few things that I would like to have.

I will continue to rest and drink lots of fluids.  This too shall pass….

Grateful for the beautiful day today, grateful this virus is going away, and grateful I can rest as needed.

Woke up with a chest cold this morning.  I had noticed last night I had a dry cough.  It hit me hard this morning.  Temperature of 101 – 103, chills, headache, and cough.  Damn!  I don’t have time for this right now.  The next three weeks are full of things to do.

I got up this morning, took some Tylenol and went back to bed.  Rinse and repeat all day long.  I did manage to get my chicken chores done and drove the car down to get the mail and bring the trash can up.  Think it is nap time again – that little venture wore me out.

I haven’t been sick for over a year.  I used to get this crap three or four times a year but only had it once early last year.  Trusting it will pass quickly and not return for another year or two.  I am not a good patient.

I did manage to eat breakfast but couldn’t get my lunch down.  I have some soup I will heat up for dinner and see if I can get some of that down.  When I don’t feel good I tend not to eat.  I have been trying to drink lots today and flush this out of my system.

Trusting this is a short-lived bug and by Monday I will be on the mend.  Luckily I don’t have anything on my calendar until then.

Grateful for the warmer temperatures today, grateful for Tylenol, and grateful I could go back to bed and rest all day.

My Match guy just left to head home to OK.  The house always feels so big and empty when he leaves.  We had a great time again.  He didn’t get here until almost 8:00 Sunday evening.  Monday we went to KC to have dinner with Nicole.  We just drove up for dinner and drove home.  Tuesday we took a three-mile hike.

We took Sophia with us on the hike.  On the way home we saw a big pile of white something on the first bridge.  It was Starr.  She had gotten out of the electronic barrier.  I attempted to hold her collar to walk her home and that didn’t last long.  We rigged up a way to put both dogs on one leash.  Starr is not leash-trained and that didn’t last long although it gave my Match guy a good workout.  We finally let Sophia loose and put the leash on Starr.  Even that was a challenge to get Starr safely home.

Other than our hike we didn’t do much Tuesday or this morning.  It was too cold to spend much time outside.  He read part of a book to me – I love listening to him read out loud to me.  We fixed a bean soup for dinner last night and I fixed bacon, eggs and hash browns for breakfast Tuesday and Wednesday morning.  He has choir practice tonight so he needed to get home.

Not sure when he will get back up here or I will get down there.  I start my volunteer tax prep job next week and he starts teaching his Osher classes next week.  We will both be busy for the next seven weeks.  We are taking another trip together towards the end of March.  This time we will be going east to visit Kathy in KY, his son in Washington DC, and his brothers in Asheville, NC.  It seems a long ways away though but time should go by quickly as we will both be busy.  We will stay in touch via emails, phone calls and text messages.

We are still getting along really well together.  He is very easy to be with.  We have lots in common although we are starting to figure out our differences too.  So far the differences are things that we can tolerate and even appreciate in the other.  Haven’t had our first disagreement yet.  When we do something or say something that the other doesn’t agree with we have been able to talk about it and understand where the other is coming from.  If nothing else we appreciate the honesty each brings to the table.

It is up to 14 degrees today from a low earlier of 2.  The wind is light so it wasn’t too bad when I was down doing chicken chores earlier.  It is to warm up nicely by the weekend.  I am ready for spring and green grass.

The Symphony office called and told me they are doing their annual newsletter next week and asked if I could help again.  I will help as I can between my tax prep duties.  The following week I am going to be babysitting Ellexia and Tagen while Tim and Michelle take a vacation together.   Those two weeks will go by really fast.

Tomorrow morning I must have Starr at the Vet office at 8:15 for her annual shots.  I always ask for the first appointment of the day so the office isn’t crowded as Starr is not leash-trained and I can’t control her very well.  They are helpful and accommodate my request.

I need to go buy some groceries either today or tomorrow.   If I wait until tomorrow I will have to make two trips to town as I can’t leave Starr unattended in my car.  She would destroy my car if given half a chance to do so.

Sitting in my peaceful valley this afternoon.  Already missing my Match guy and he just left! He brings such joy and fun to my life.  Makes my life feel richer and more complete somehow.  Learning to go with the flow and stay present with what is.  The future still feels a bit complicated which is my reminder to stay present.  No one knows with 100% certainty what the future holds.  I can only stay present and enjoy every rich moment that presents itself to me each and every day.

Grateful for my Match guy and the joy he brings to me, grateful to find ways to give back to the community I live in, and grateful for the lessons life gives me to remind me this moment is where life happens.

Went to my last Pioneer Bluffs Board Meeting this morning.  It only lasted 20 minutes.  Came home, fixed a crock pot of soup and took a long nap.  I only slept for three hours last night and needed more sleep.  Feeling much better this afternoon after my nap.

It was almost nice walking down to take care of the chickens.  The wind is a little brisk but I love the blue skies and bright sun shine.  It was almost 50 degrees out.  Maybe the wind will help dry up the mud some.  The coop is slippery it is so muddy.

Got the sheets on my bed washed and changed and the rest of my laundry done.  Finished cleaning my house – or at least as much as I planned on doing.  Now I get to sit and wait for my Match guy to get here.  He had a meeting he needed to attend this afternoon and got a late start to head this way.  It will be good to see him again.

Got some weather-stripping to try to stop the air leaks around the doors in the laundry room.  I put some up this afternoon.  I need to remember to hand test it when the wind is blowing tomorrow.  My laundry room is either the warmest or coldest room in the house depending on which direction the wind is blowing.  Not sure I put the stripping on correctly.

Feeling a bit disconnected this afternoon for some reason.  Maybe my long nap disoriented me.  Still in my peaceful valley place but feeling strangely alone today.  Glad my Match guy is coming tonight.  I must need to get out more and be with others.  It is reminding me of my year’s goal which is to secure ”we”.  Hard to do when I spend most of my time alone.  Have been finding it hard to get out and go places lately.  Trusting when it warms up and the weather is better I will get out more.

Grateful for the friends I made while serving on the board at Pioneer Bluffs, grateful my term of service is complete, and grateful my Match guy is headed this way.

Got my laundry room cleaned this morning.  It was way over due for a good cleaning.  The cats have fresh litter and the mud is cleaned up for now.  It is still muddy out so may be repeating my cleaning soon.

Sent a text to the grandkids and their mother inviting them to lunch so we could celebrate Tagen’s birthday.  Michelle decided not to go but I picked up the kiddos and we had lunch at Applebee’s.  They were so good and both ate most of their lunch. They wanted to come out to my house afterwards so I brought them home for the afternoon. I have a meeting tomorrow morning so they can’t spend the night.  I’ll take them back into town this evening.

Tagen is officially taller than I am now and weights 16 pounds more than I do.  He has grown about an inch since Christmas.  My little buddy is growing up quickly!

It is a nice day out today.  Mid 40’s and bright sunshiny day.  Tagen was out hitting baseballs for a bit.  I’ll take them out with me to do chicken chores in a bit.  It sure is muddy out though.  I’m grateful for the mud as it means we have had moisture which the prairie needed.

Grateful the grandkids came to spend the afternoon with me, grateful they are both happy and caring kiddos, and grateful to be their G.

 

It has been a productive day for me today. I went to Emporia this morning and crossed off nine things on my to-do list.  I got the flea and tic medication for the dogs and cats, made an appointment tot take Star in for her annual check, got some Pop-Choc from the Sweet Granada for part of my grandson’s birthday present, got a three-inch binder to put my tax preparation guides in, got groceries, filled the car with gas, got the medication for my bunions, went to the bank to cash two checks and dropped off the recycling stuff.

I took a nap this afternoon instead of cleaning so I will have to clean house this evening and finish it up tomorrow.  My Match guys is coming Sunday evening and will be here until Wednesday afternoon.  I have my last Pioneer Bluffs Board meeting to go to Sunday morning.  Saturday I need to track Tagen down and give him his birthday presents.

I am sitting in my corner chair in the living room watching the sunset.  It is a rosy pink color this evening – stunning.  It was a beautiful day out but still a bit cold for my likes.  The wind came back and the wind chill was a factor again today.  At least it wasn’t as cold as it was yesterday.

Still sitting in my peaceful valley.  Having a volunteer project to work on feels good.  I still have a lot to learn about taxes but am feeling better about it.  All I can do is my best and see what happens.  There is a review process that happens after I prepare a return so if I do make a mistake the reviewer will catch it before it causes problems for the person I am to be helping.  I will be glad when the first couple of returns are done and I am comfortable with the process.

One downside of doing this volunteer project is it will limit the amount of time I can spend with my Match guy.  He is teaching classes every Tuesday and Thursday for six weeks starting February 11 so he will also be busy.  We are planning a trip together back east towards the end of March.  I hope we don’t go eight weeks without seeing each other though.  I have a couple of three-day stretches when I don’t do taxes and he doesn’t have class so we will have to figure something out during those times.  I may have to switch a day or so with another volunteer so we can spend some quality time together.

Grateful for all the things I was able to cross of my to-do list for the day, grateful for a nap, and grateful to have found a way to be in service to others.

 

What a fricking cold day.  The cold combined with the wind made chores a very cold job today.  It looked so nice out until I stepped into the wind.  My hands were ice cubes by the time I was done with chores.

Got a text from CVS telling me they can’t fill my new prescription as it is too soon.  Evidently Walgreen’s processed it through insurance even though it was to have been cancelled and transferred.  Walgreen’s hasn’t let me know if the script is ready to be picked up.   I wasn’t in the mood to get it all sorted out today.  Maybe I will be tomorrow.  Good thing it wasn’t an urgent situation and I needed to have started the medication sooner rather than later.

When I was doing breakfast cleanup I realized my feet were getting wet.  Looked under the sink and found water dripping out onto the floor.  When I cleared everything out from under the sink and turned the water back on to see where it was coming from I found it coming from the bottom of my garbage disposal.  Called the plumber and he said it needed to be replaced.  They were able to come out this afternoon and take care of it for me.  Scheer Plumbing is the best.  I think my house was missing them.  They hadn’t been out for over a year.

Went to class tonight and am feeling a bit better about being prepared to start doing income tax returns.  I was able to input a sample return and found it to be rather easy.  The leaders promised they would start me with simple returns and not give me the harder ones until I was ready.  I think I can, I think I can.  If you want your income taxes prepared for you for free call the Emporia Sr Center and they will schedule you.  There is no income test or age requirement.  Anyone that lives in KS can have them done for free as long as your return is within our scope of what we can do.  We can’t do rental properties that require depreciation or a small business that has inventory considerations.  Most returns we can do.

I will need to go to Emporia tomorrow.  I didn’t allow enough time this afternoon to go to the vet’s office to get flea and tic medication.  I’m hoping I will have a prescription to pick up for me tomorrow too.  I also need a few groceries.  I hope it is warmer tomorrow.

Grateful for my plumber that always takes care of me promptly, grateful for volunteer opportunities, and grateful this day is almost over.

It has been a more productive day for me than normal.  The sun finally returned from its vacation and has been busy melting the ice and snow this afternoon.  The skies are back to being bright blue and the wind has moved on to greener pastures.  It is a beautiful winter day out.

Got some house cleaning done finally.  Still have more to do but it is nice to have some done.  Got the rental properties tax information gathered and that part of my tax prep is done.  Also got my medical costs added up for the year.  All the critters have been taken care of for the day.

Called the Doctor’s office in Wichita today to get my prescription sent to the correct pharmacy.  They called me back and took care of it.  The pharmacy had to order the medication and will let me know when they receive it.  I took some Advil this morning and for some reason it upset my tummy a bit.  Don’t think I want to take pills for six weeks if it is going to react like that.  Trusting the topical stuff will work. I wore my new tennis shoes today.  My foot is sore – I had gotten used to going barefoot most of the time.  I will push through and see what happens in the next six weeks.

I have tax class tonight at 5:30.  Not sure if I want to eat dinner at 4:30 or wait until after class to eat.  I normally eat at 5:30.

I have four dozen eggs if anyone needs some.  The girls are back to laying between 10 and 12 a day.  Without having house guests the eggs are starting to pile up.

Had trouble finding the study guide I was to use to do my tax prep homework.  I finally called one of the leaders and she helped me find it on-line.  I loaned my laptop to Nicole and was using my iPad on the site.  It kept kicking me off.  I am going to class tonight very unprepared.  I’ll have to beg forgiveness tonight.  They received the paper copy of the guide I need last week and since I missed class I didn’t get my copy.  Guess I know what I will be doing tomorrow – catching up!  Good thing I learn fast most of the time.

This week has gone by fast.  Being retired the days of the week don’t make much sense to me anymore.  Most days I do the same thing – not much of anything!  Good thing my iPhone tells me what day of the week it is or I would have no clue most days.

Still sitting in my peaceful valley.  It has been an easy day full of grace and ease.  I like days like that.  Feel very grounded and centered today.

Grateful the sun returned today and the roads are clearing, grateful for a productive day, and grateful for grace and ease when it shows up in my day.

 

It is another winter day on the plains of KS today.  Rain changed to sleet and ice today and it is now snowing.  It will look like a winter wonderland in the morning if the sun shines.

When I went down to do the chickens before I left for Wichita I was carrying an empty five-gallon bucket back up to the barn.  The wind caught the bucket and I almost took flight.  I had a Mary Poppins moment!  The trip to pull the trash can down the driveway was a challenge.  The walk back up was brutal as I was walking into the wind.  Glad I did it before I left for Wichita.

The foot doctor gave me a bit of a reprieve.  He recommended a pair of New Balance wide shoes and he prescribed a tropical anti-inflammatory medication.  I am to try those two things for six weeks to see if my bunions will calm down.  He said they are very inflamed. If it works I can put off surgery for as long as I can stand the pain.  If it doesn’t work the only other option he recommended was surgery.

If I do surgery I will have to be non-weight bearing for two weeks and on crutches and then I wear a boot for six to eight more weeks.  He said the first two weeks are rough but then recovery seems to go smoothly.  It will be a rinse and repeat thing as both feet need fixed.  He recommends 12 weeks between surgeries.  If and when I decide to have surgery I call his office and they will put me on the schedule.  I am going to cross my fingers that the new shoes and anti-inflammatory medication calm things down.

I stopped at the New Balance store in Wichita and got a pair of shoes.  The guy that helped me seem to know what he was doing.  He had me try on three different options.  The pair I got had the most give in the bunion area and allowed it the most room.  The foot doctor recommended I not wear any other shoes for the six-week trial time.  Tennis shoes go with everything – right?  I will continue to wear my muck boots to do chicken chores but that doesn’t take long so I won’t be in them for long each day.

I drove through rain that turned to ice for about 40 minutes on the way to Wichita.  Once I got to Newton and on into Wichita it was clear.  It started sprinkling as I left the doctor’s office though and rained and iced on me all the way home.  My wipers had trouble keeping my windshield clear of ice.  I played it safe and drove below the speed limit most of the way.  I kept testing my brakes and never did slip and slide.  I was very grateful to get home safe and sound.

The college closed the campus so my class for tonight was cancelled.  I am to do homework tonight or tomorrow and the instructors will briefly answer questions tomorrow night over the material they were going to cover tonight.  Class tomorrow night might run a bit over as they have two nights of information to cover.

The good news it is to be 41 tomorrow and the sun is to return from the short vacation it took today.  That should melt the inch of snow we are forecast to get tonight.

It is so nice to be tucked in for the night.  I have the fireplace on and the house is nice and cozy.  Grateful for a safe trip to and from Wichita in the winter weather.  Grateful class was cancelled so I can stay in tonight.

I had one of those moments this morning that I realized how I have progressed in my inner journey.  I was able to put into words something that had triggered me and find a way to communicate it.  I wouldn’t have been able to do that several years ago – maybe even one year ago.  That felt good!

Grateful for a safe journey today, grateful for a chance to avoid surgery – at least for a bit, and grateful to be tucked into my cozy house tonight.

A friend came over yesterday afternoon and taught me a work-out routine.  I am a tad sore today but not bad.  It was easier than I expected it to be.  I will do the routine three times a week.  Once I get it down my trainer will come back and make sure I am doing it correctly and teach me some different ones to do.

I have never been able to stick to an exercise plan.  I realized I need to treat it like I do flour and sugar.  For today, I choose not to eat food that contains flour or sugar.  Maybe tomorrow I will choose to eat it.  So for today, I choose to work-out.  Tomorrow I may choose not to.  Thinking about working out the rest of my life is too overwhelming and depressing.  One day at a time!

I watched the full moon rise.  It came up before the sun set so wasn’t a great moon rise.  As the sky got darker the moon got brighter and more beautiful.  Unfortunately clouds rolled in during the eclipse so I didn’t get to see the blood-red moon.  When I got up during the night the living room was very bright as the full moon light was reflecting off the snow on the ground.  My Match guy went out and watched the eclipse and called me and gave me a minute by minute description of what he could see.

This morning I went into Emporia and picked up a few groceries.  I didn’t do any other errands while I was in town.  I need to go to the bank but they were closed today.  I have my laundry done and am starting on doing some housework.  With all the mud outside my house has gotten tracked up and dirty.  I still need to get the two guest beds put back together.  I seem to be moving slowly these days.

The snow is gradually melting off the prairie today.  It is only 35 but there is a brisk wind.  I’m glad I need to carry a bucket of feed down with me when I go to the chicken coop so I don’t blow over.

I had to change a light bulb in the living room last night.  I have trouble with the extension pole.  It twists to keep it extended.  The top part of it came undone and was stuck to the light bulb in the ceiling.  Luckily it had a long string on it so the suction cup would let loose.  I couldn’t get it back into the bottom of the extension pole.  I got a suitcase to put on top of my short step-ladder and that was enough height that I could use just the top part of the extension pole and reach the light bulb.  I was able to successfully change the light bulb.  I am always ridiculously proud of myself when I figure something like that out and it works.

My Match guy sends me a letter everyday and I always send him one.  For some reason the letter I got from him this morning triggered something in me.  I can’t quite put my finger on what it was and why I got triggered.  I have finally learned when someone says something that triggers me it is a clue to myself to look within and find the range that has a tension point in it and expand the range.  I’ll have to sit with this one a bit more to discover what that range is.  I love learning new things about myself.

Still in my peaceful valley today although I feel like I am at the edge of it and occasionally step out of the peace.  So far I have been able to tip myself back into it.  I didn’t have a big reaction to the full moon this month which is a bit unusual for me.  I did have a crying jag last Thursday so maybe that released the emotion I had been holding and had little to come up during the full moon period.

Grateful my first day of exercise is done and it was easy, grateful I was abl to change a light bulb, and grateful for an opportunity to learn yet another range I need to bust open within.

I passed the two tax preparation class tests I needed to take.  One I had studied for and the other I couldn’t find the material to study but had a copy of the test.  The answers seemed pretty common sense so I decided to try it.  You get two tries before you are kicked out of class and only need 80% correct.  I missed one out of 10.  Trusting the tests we take during class this week will be that easy.

It is a beautiful winter day on the prairie today.  The moon was so bright last night I didn’t have to turn a light on when I got up to go to the bathroom.  I was awake for a bit before the sun came up and the pre-sunrise colors were amazing.  I fell back asleep before the sun came up.  The moon was close to setting in the west and was wonderful to watch.

I’m excited to see the full wolf moon rise tonight and then watch the lunar eclipse that will be happening.  Clouds are to roll in sometime this evening so trusting they will stay away from the moon.

After I do chicken chores I need to get after my income tax records and finish them up.  Once I start my volunteer job I won’t have as much free time and I would like to have my taxes done before I start that job February 4.

It was like an ice skating rink walking down to do chicken chores yesterday.  The pen mud had frozen over and was very slick.  Even the snow on the grass was slick.  I walked very slowly and carefully and managed not to fall.  It looks like things are melting a bit today so the trip down and back may be easier today.  I had to chip ice away from the door to get it opened yesterday.  They will need water today so am trusting I can get it down there safely and then not spill it all over when I fill their container.  I have been known to do that.

Tuesday I go to the foot doctor in Wichita.  It is to snow Tuesday late afternoon.  Hope I get down and back without weather issues.  I have tax prep class in Emporia that night.  I hate driving in snowing, ice or rain.

I need to go to town and go to the grocery store.  I’m waiting to see if I need to babysit Ellexia tonight if Michelle gets called into work.  I may wait until tomorrow to go if I don’t babysit as the roads will be clear by then.  I haven’t checked my driveway to see if I can get out.  Thinking I can as the snow really didn’t pile up too deep close to the house.

Still sitting in my peaceful valley today.  I feel refilled and balanced today.  I love when that happens and wish I knew how to make it happen.  Stopping and resting and allowing myself to be seems to help me find that space again.  Life seems to be in perspective for me today.  I can stay fully present in this moment and the worry about the future seems to have receded.

Grateful for the beautiful moon last night that lit my house, grateful for passing my two tests, and grateful for the peaceful valley I find myself in today.

Happy birthday to my grandson Tagen.  He turns 13 today.  He has grown into a sensitive, gentle young man who I am very proud of.  Love my little buddy!

It has been a lazy day so far for me.  I’m still a bit tired and unmotivated to do anything.  Guess it is a good thing I don’t have anything I have to get done.  I need some groceries but am not going to get out in this cold wind.  Trying to work up the courage to walk down and feed the chickens.

Roxy was scratching at the door so I went to see what she needed.  She was coated in ice so I let her come in for a bit.  She has been sleeping in front of the fireplace for over an hour now.  Her coat is nice and dry and warm now.  The other two dogs are hiding out under the heat lamp in the garage.  I closed the garage door so the garage will stay a bit warmer for them.  The cats looked outside and turned right around and jumped up to their warm spot above the washing machine.  I haven’t seen the chickens out in the pen yet today.  It is too cold for beast or man out today.

I keep telling myself if I go down and take care of the chickens I then can take a short nap.  So far even that carrot dangling in front of me hasn’t gotten me out of my chair.  I did manage to eat breakfast and lunch but that is all I have done today.

The prairie must have gotten about two inches of snow.  It is hard to tell as the wind has been gusting to 40 MPH or more and has blown the snow around.  I still had a bit of snow left from the last snow storm.  The sun has come out this afternoon so maybe that will help me find some energy.

I’m excited for the full wolf super moon Sunday evening.  There will be a lunar eclipse that night too.  So far the weather forecast is showing clear skies.  If anyone wants to come out and watch it with me holler.  I will be around and would love to have company to share it with.

Sitting in my peaceful but sleepy valley this afternoon.  Life on the prairie always seems extra quiet when I come home from being with someone for a couple of days. I love the quiet of the prairie but also love being with someone.  Wish I knew how to be in two places at the same time.  I do feel my soul being refilled and balanced as I sit in the sunshine in my chair this afternoon.  Maybe that is all that I can get done today.  Maybe that is enough!

Grateful for the sunshine this afternoon, grateful for my grandson, and grateful for a day of rest and recharging.

 

Home again after being with my Match guy since Monday evening.  We had a grand time.  We took several hikes, went to see a huge herd of bison, saw a bunch of deer, went to a concert, made a jigsaw puzzle, and enjoyed each other’s company.  It was hard to say goodbye and come home this morning.

He continues to impress me with his compassion and awareness of my feelings.  I had a moment last night and he handled it beautifully.

I stopped at Costco in Wichita to pick up two things.  The road construction in that area is terrible.  Ended up taking 21st Street North to get to a different Turnpike entrance as Kellogg is hard to get to.

I hit light mist and fog just north of El Dorado.  It has been lightly raining ever since I got home around 2:30.  The forecast shows it will turn to snow sometime this evening although accumulation is not predicted to be more than an inch or two.  The chicken coop is a muddy mess.  Most of the snow has melted and there is water standing in much of the yard.  It should all freeze up tomorrow as temperatures aren’t to get over 20 and will dip to single digits overnight tomorrow night.  Thankfully it is to warm back up Sunday and stay more comfortable next week.  I am not a fan of cold weather.

I have done three loads of laundry and have one more load to wash.  I so appreciate my friend staying in my house while I was gone.  The dogs and cats do better when someone is here all day and evening and not just have someone drop by for ten minutes twice a day.  All the critters seemed happy and content when I got home this afternoon.  One of the chickens had laid a fairy egg.

I am really tired this evening.  Betting it will be an early bath and bedtime for me unless I catch a second wind and find some energy.  I’m glad I have a quiet weekend planned so I can rest and recover.

Tuesday next week I go to my foot surgeon to find out what he says about my bunions.  They flare up and are painful at times.  Even a light blanket over my foot at night hurts.  Sure hoping the doctor recommends something besides surgery but not really counting on it.  Guess I will find out Tuesday.

I have tax preparation class next week on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday evenings.  That will make next week go by quickly.  I still need to take my two tests from this week’s classes that I missed.  I’ll do that either tomorrow or Sunday.  I’m too tired to do it tonight.

Sitting in my peaceful valley this evening.  Contemplating where this relationship with my Match guy is going and how it might unfold.  I am aware of the need to continue to choose each moment and not get ahead of myself by trying to figure out how the future will unfold.  It still feels complicated to look too far ahead which is my warning to stay present and not get caught up in the details of how the future will unfold.

Grateful for my Match guy and the many ways he shows great compassion for me, grateful for my house sitter that allowed me a chance to get away, and grateful for a safe journey to and from OK.

Getting packed and ready to head to OK this afternoon.  My trainer is coming at 1:00 to teach me my first set of exercises.  When she leaves I will do evening chores and head south.  Glad I decided to go today as tomorrow we have a chance for a freezing fog overnight.  Rain and more snow may be coming in later this week so may have to come home a day early – or stay a day or two longer.  I’ll see how it plays out.

Have been doing some housecleaning this morning to get my house ready for the house sitter.  Got the sheets on my bed washed and the bed made up so if she wants to use the master bedroom it is clean and ready for her.  Still have a few more things to take care and I need to finish packing and then I will be ready to go.

I am feeling much better today.  The restlessness from yesterday is gone. I only got one sleep though so am a bit tired.  My first sleep was a good four hours long though.  Just couldn’t get a second sleep last night so I have been up since 3:00 this morning.  May be a long day as I don’t have time to take a nap.

Not sure if I will blog while I am gone or not.  I may have other things to do.  I’ll see how the week unfolds.  We are going to a symphony concert in Oklahoma City Tuesday night.  Thursday we are going to the Osage Prairie which is about 80 miles away to see a herd of over 2,500 buffalo and to take a long hike if the weather permits.   I bet the week goes by pretty quickly.

Didn’t get my tax preparation test taken yesterday.  I was too restless to settle down and get it done.  I have until a week from tomorrow to get it done so will probably wait and do it this coming weekend after I get home.  Thinking I won’t want to spend time while I am gone doing homework.

Glad I was able to climb out of the muck pond I took a quick dip into yesterday.  I hadn’t visited the muck pond for quite a while.  Getting out and playing in the snow helped me walk out of it quicker than I have been able to before.  I’ll take that as a sign of personal progress.

Back into my peaceful, excited valley today.  I am full of anticipation today.  Looking forward to a fun couple of days away.

Grateful for my house sitter that will allow me to get away this week, grateful for clear driving weather today, and grateful to be able to see my Match guy this evening.

It is another cold, cloudy day on the prairie.  High is in the low 30’s.  The wind blew hard for a bit last night but seems to have quieted down this morning.  I went out to do chores and my footprints from yesterday were covered over on my path down to the coop.  There is a layer of ice below the snow.  I walked down my driveway to get my mail.  I can get out if needed today but will probably wait to get out tomorrow.  I’m glad there isn’t a big drift in my driveway that I needed to shovel.

I am having a restless day.  Getting out and doing chores and taking a short walk helped a bit.  I can’t seem to settle on doing anything today.  I feel like a cat on a hot tin roof.  This is my third day of staying in and not seeing anyone.  Maybe I do need to get out today.  Don’t really have anywhere to go except to dump my recycling and that can wait till tomorrow on my way out-of-town.

I need to settle down and get my homework done and take the two tests that I need to take.  One I studied for and am ready to take and the other I still need to read the information.  I am too restless to do so right now.

I quit eating cheese yesterday and my tummy is much better today.  I had been off dairy for almost a year and decided to try some cheese.  Evidently that wasn’t a good idea.  I had eaten some cheese on my trip to CO and NM and had noticed my tummy was loud then too.  The more often I ate cheese the worse it got.  Glad I figured out what was going on.  Wonder if other dairy products will bother me too?  Thinking they will but I am stubborn enough I will probably test it out.  At least if I get the same reaction I will know what is going on quickly.

Made a packing list for tomorrow.  Need to do laundry in the morning so I can get packed.  Hope to be on the road by 4:00.  It is a three-hour drive if I don’t make any stops.  Trusting the roads south of here will be clear and easy driving.

My trainer is coming tomorrow afternoon at 1:00 to teach me my first set of exercises to do.  I didn’t get to town to get my weights so will have to improvise with what ever we can find to use that weights two or five pounds.  I am looking forward to getting started and to see if I can stick to some sort of routine.  I have never stuck with one yet but am going to give it a chance.  I have been on Bright Lines for over 11 months now – the longest I have ever stuck with a dietary change.  If I can do that I can do this – right?

It does help to stick to my goals when I have a solid reason for the change.  I have a belief that processed foods that contain flour and sugar would cause me to have a remission of the thyroid cancer so avoiding them is in my best interest.  I also believe that if I can firm up my body and build muscle strength I will enjoy life more and life will be easier for me.  It will help prevent falls and will strengthen my bones.  That, at least, is my story and I am sticking to it.

I’m excited to see my Match guy tomorrow night.  Time goes so fast when we are together and seems to drag when we are not together.  I bet this week flies by and it will be Friday and time to come home before I want it to be here.

Sitting in my peaceful valley today although it feels a bit more restless than peaceful to me today.  Getting out and moving my body helped burn off some of the restlessness.  I still feel it bubbling up inside though.  I will allow it to be what it is and not make a story up about what is causing it.  It seems to go away faster when I can do that.

Grateful my driveway is driveable without having to shovel, grateful I discovered what was upsetting my tummy, and grateful tomorrow is Monday and I get to see my Match guy.

 

The prairie got about 5 inches of snow overnight.  There was no wind during the night so all the grass is covered which is unusual.  It is a beautiful winter wonderland outside today.  The wind has picked up this afternoon and is blowing the snow around.  Trusting it won’t cause it to drift my driveway shut.

The board meeting I was to go to at Pioneer Bluffs got postponed.  I’m glad as I now get to stay home all day and not try to get my little car out.  I don’t have any where to go tomorrow either so that will give the roads until Monday to get clear for me.

I went down to take care of the chickens.  There were places the snow was almost up to my knees as I walked down the yard to the coop.  The snow made the overhead fencing sag so I brushed the snow off the fencing.  I got a snow bath in the process.  I have a major repair job that will need to be done to the fence when the weather is better.  The chickens stayed inside today but gave me 8 eggs on this cold and snowy day.  Good girls!

I have been working on putting a jigsaw puzzle together today.  Got my housework done yesterday and didn’t really have anything else to do so I got a puzzle out to make.  I moved the table I am working the puzzle on in front of the fireplace and I have been staying nice and warm.  The snow makes the prairie feel very quiet and peaceful today.  I am enjoying the snow since I get to stay tucked up inside.

The dogs have been staying in the garage most of the day under the heat lamp.  That is a bit unusual for them as they love the cold weather and snow.  Don’t blame them though for staying where it is warm.  The cats wanted out until I opened the door and they saw the snow.  They both turned around and jumped up to their warm shelf they like to sleep on.  Smart cats!

I do need to make a packing list for Monday.  I don’t need to take much as I am only going to be gone for four nights.  Not leaving until late Monday afternoon so still have plenty of time to pack.

Guess I should give some thought to making sure the house is nice and clean for the house sitter.  I will wash my linens Monday morning and make my bed in case she wants to use my bed.  Maybe with the snow the dust will be settled for a bit and the house will stay clean a bit longer.

Nice to have an unexpected free day at home.  I was also going to babysit the grandkids tonight but Tim had to go to KY so they aren’t going to the dinner party they had wanted to go to.  I have had a fairly busy week for me and hadn’t had a full day at home with nothing to do until yesterday.  Now I get three in a row!  If I still baked this would be a good day to bake something.

My tummy has been making the loudest noises lately.  Trying to decide what I am eating that is setting it off.  Thinking it is either cheese or peanut butter.  I added both of those foods to my diet about the same time and am not sure which one is causing my issues.  I left the cheese off my salad today to see what happens.  So far my tummy is acting better.  I wonder if I am lactose intolerant and never knew before.  The cheese I had been eating is the only dairy I eat.  I don’t count eggs as dairy.  I will hold off eating cheese for a week or so and then try it again and see what happens.  May have to do the same thing for the peanut butter.

Sitting in my peaceful valley today.  It has been an extra quiet day on the prairie for me today.  Snow must act like a muffler for outside noises.  It was fun to get out and stomp around in the snow for a bit when I did chores.  My winter overalls came in handy today as I stayed nice and warm outside.

Grateful for the beautiful snow that fell overnight with no wind, grateful for a free day at home, and grateful the power has stayed on and my house is nice and cozy warm.

 

 

Went to my first training class to learn how to be a volunteer tax preparer last night. We quickly moved from one site to another so we could use computers.  We got signed on to the training sites and created our personal accounts and passwords.  Played with the site a bit.  Seems pretty intuitive to use.

Found out there are two additional classes next week.  I am going to be gone so will have to make other arrangements.  Luckily those two classes seem pretty simple.  I looked at one of the two tests today and feel really confident I can pass it.  I will be doing homework while I am in OK next week.

The following week we have three classes that teach us the heart of preparing the returns.  I am glad I will be here for those three classes.  Just wish they would have told us about the additional five classes when they told us about the first one.

I told them I would work lots of hours when I am in town as I will be gone some during the two and one-half months we will be preparing returns.  Not sure when I will get my schedule.  I was unclear if they do the schedule a month at a time or a week at a time.  They seem pretty flexible and welcome us to work only when it is convenient.

It was nice seeing my Marine and his wife last night.  Her daughter was also with them so I got to meet her.  We had a good conversation after they got here.  They had planned on staying until tomorrow but had truck troubles and needed to get home by early afternoon.  The weather was also a bit dicey as snow is predicted both in KS and MO for tonight and tomorrow.

I have sheets washing and trash done.  Will get the beds made and the floors and bathrooms cleaned this afternoon.  Don’t have any other guests scheduled at this point until April.  That can always change quickly though and I like to keep the rooms ready just in case someone books.

Today marks eleven months of being on the Bright Lines Eating Plan.  I lost 50 pounds during that time and have completely changed how I eat.  It gets easier everyday to stick to the plan.  My main two bright lines above all else is to avoid any type of flour or sugar.  I do cheat occasionally and eat a snack, although that is rare.  I no longer weigh and measure my food like I did at the beginning.  As long as my weight remains stable I am good to go.  I have set an upper weight limit for myself and if I hit that I have to go back to being much stricter with what and when I eat.  So far I haven’t gotten there.  It has been almost five months since I hit my goal weight and I actually am 9 pounds below that goal today.  I haven’t lost any more weight for over a month now so thinking I have hit my bottom weight.

Someone at the meeting last night that I knew and hadn’t seen since I lost the weight  commented on how thin I am.  That still feels weird when someone says something as I still don’t see myself as thin. I have read that it can take up to two years to change your own self-image after a major weight loss and see yourself as others see you.

I am staying tucked inside today.  The rain makes the prairie feel very quiet today.  The Pioneer Bluffs Board Meeting scheduled for tomorrow may get postponed depending on weather.  Some of the board members live in KC and it may be difficult for them to get there.  We are supposed to get up to five inches of snow overnight.  Snow seems to be hard to predict though so I will believe it when I see it.

I finally slept really good last night.  Got two good sleeps in – each about four hours.  As usual though when I get extra sleep I feel extra tired today.  May take a nap on this cold and wet day.  Perfect napping weather!

Sitting in my peaceful valley today.  Feeling a deep sense of contentment today and feeling all is well.  The rain is giving the earth a winter drink, the house is quiet, the critters are all tucked inside and content, and nothing needs to be done.  Nice to have a day like this.  I’m looking forward to seeing my Match guy Monday evening.

Grateful for the visit from my Marine and his family, grateful for a volunteer opportunity that feels like it will be rewarding and meaningful, and grateful for the rain on the prairie today.

There was a beautiful sunrise this morning.  It was shades of red and gray.  I thought it would be a cloudy day later and I was right.  The wind is picking up and the temperature is starting to drop.  Rain is in the forecast for tomorrow and snow on Saturday.  Guess it is winter time – I was confused for a bit and thought we had jumped right to spring.

Got the storage room cleaned out last night.  I must have brought up six loads of stuff to donate.  My little car was packed full when I took it in to Goodwill this afternoon.  Feels good to have that load of stuff out of the house.  I may find some more stuff now that I can get to it.  When I get the beds out of there I will do some more sorting and tossing.

I was equally loaded coming home as I stopped at Bluestem and got 200 # of chicken feed, 100 # of dog food, and 200 # of water softener salt.  I was riding low coming home.  I also stopped at Wal-Mart and got a few groceries.  Trying to get everything I need so I can be gone most of next week.

I also worked on the furnace room and got it straightened out a bit.  I still have some work to do in that room.  I listed the full twin set and the twin set of mattress and box springs on Facebook.  So far one person may be interested in the full twin set.  It would be nice to get those pieces out of the storage room so I can get to my yarn.

Gave the dogs their HeartGuard and charged their collars today.  The collar that wouldn’t charge two weeks ago charged today.  Not sure what the deal is but am grateful it charged today.  Those collars have worked well up until a month or so ago when two of the three got out of the border and went for a short trip in the pasture across the street.  Never did figure out how that happened.  They have been sticking close the last couple of days.

I have my first meeting to learn what I have volunteered for this evening at 5:30.  It will be one of those days that I make two trips to Emporia in the same day.  I try not to let that happen but decided to get the car unloaded and the critter food home before dark.  Trying to decide if I want to eat dinner before I go or eat when I get home.

My Marine and his wife and her daughter will be here later this evening.  Not sure if I will be home before they get here or not.  It will be so good to see them again.  They are staying until Saturday so we will have all day tomorrow to visit and catch up.

Thought about running to KC tomorrow so I could go to Costco but decided I will be going right by one on my way home next Friday and I can stop then.  No use driving miles when it isn’t absolutely necessary.

Still sitting in my peaceful valley.  It felt good to lift the feed sacks today on to the cart and then out of the car.  I got help getting them off the cart and into the car.  I am looking forward to getting stronger so that job is easy.  Got my first work out in today lifting 500 pounds of stuff.  Yesterday I did six trips up and down the basement stairs.  Guess I am off and running!

Grateful for the beautiful sunrise this morning, grateful for getting the storage room and furnace room straightened out, and grateful for the dog collar working correctly again even though I don’t understand why it started working again.

Went into coffee this morning with other Chase County women.  Had over 15 show up today so it was a big group.  Beautiful to see the women care for each other in big and small ways.  It makes one’s life much richer to have a wonderful support system like these women are for each other.

Have been working on cleaning out my storage closet.  I had cleaned the guest bedrooms around Thanksgiving time and had piled extra stuff in the closet and am just now getting to the pile.  I need to sell a twin sized box springs and mattress and a full twin bed set including frame, box springs and mattress.  Anyone interested let me know.  They are very clean and in like-new condition.  Just need them out of my way.

I have lots of extra bedding for twin beds to get rid of too.  If someone needs twin-sized blankets, bedspreads or mattress covers let me know ASAP.  Otherwise I am taking it all to the Goodwill.  I don’t like not being able to get into that room and need it out of my way.

My Marine and his wife are coming to visit me this week and staying overnight for two nights.  I am excited to see them again.  He still doesn’t know what his work situation is going to be and is still hoping to get assigned to work near by again.

This week is going by fast as I have been busy everyday.  Tomorrow evening I have my first meeting with my new volunteer opportunity.  I will be trained on how to prepare simple income tax returns – primarily for senior citizens.  I don’t know what the time commitment is so trusting I can work it in between my trips to OK to see my Match guy and his trips here.  Trusting they will be flexible with my scheduling.

Saturday I have my last board meeting at Pioneer Bluffs.  I will miss seeing some of the people on the board.  I plan on continuing to volunteer so I will be able to stay in touch with the board members that come to the events.

Sunday is my only free day this week.  I leave Monday late afternoon to go visit my Match guy for several days.  A dear friend is going to housesit for me this time while I am gone.  I prefer that over someone who just comes twice a day to feed the critters.  Since this is a short trip I was able to find someone that could come stay in the house while I am gone.

I hit my shin on the marble edge of the tub last night when I was getting out of the tub.  I had a big goose egg on my shin last night.  It is still there this morning although it is smaller and is tender to the touch.  I finally put some ice on it last night as it was aching and keeping me awake.  At least today it only hurts if I touch it.  Sometimes I am clumsy!

After I finish cleaning out the closet I need to clean out the furnace room.  For some reason stuff has gotten piled up in that room too.  Drives me crazy when I go down to get something and can’t get through that room easily.  I keep forgetting to sort it out.  For some reason I have some extra energy today and want to take advantage of it.  It is too cold to go hike so I will burn it off inside instead.

Anyone have any 2, 5 and/or 10 pound dumbbells they want to get rid of?  I need to get some before Monday and would prefer to get used ones instead of new ones.

Saturday afternoon I need to stock up on critter food again.  I am down to my last bags of dog food and chicken feed.  I like getting four to six bags of each at a time so I only have to get it every other month or so.  Guess if it snows Saturday as predicted all that weight will help keep my car on the road for the ride home.

Sitting in my peaceful valley today.  Loving the extra energy I have today.  It is about time my energy level rose back up again.  Nice to get a few projects done around here.

Grateful for the deep support system the Chase County women provide for each other, grateful for the extra energy I have today so I can get some projects done around the house, and grateful my Marine and his wife are coming to visit me.  I have missed them!

Another beautiful day on the prairie although it is a touch windy today.  For January I’ll take a day like this anytime.

Met the trainer today.  She is more of a Wellness Coach than just a trainer.  We had a good conversation.  Found out her mother’s dad was a brother to my step-grandfather.  It is a small world!  We just talked today and she is coming back next Monday to get me started on some exercises.  I need to get some dumbbells of different weights so I can be ready for her.

She is also working with a friend of mine who recommended her to me.  My friend wants to work out with me once or twice a week.  That will help keep me going.  Maybe I can finally find an exercise routine that I will stick to.

She is going to start me on light weight lifting three days a week and yoga type stretches three days a week.  I have lots of empty space and have the time to make this happen.  The challenge will be when I am with my Match guy.  He likes to walk but doesn’t do strength training.  Maybe he will join me?

Not sure how often I am going to meet with the trainer.  Guessing once I get started we will only need to meet monthly so she can evaluate my progress and change things up as needed.

She not only teaches strength training but also has her clients look at their emotional well-being as well as diet.  I have done a lot of that work and need to focus on the strength part.

She just got her Master’s in December and is figuring out what to do next in her life.  She is fun to visit with.  I wish I knew what she knows at 28 when I was 28.

Besides meeting with her for two hours today I haven’t done much.  A friend came by to bring me something and stayed and visited for a short bit.  Haven’t crossed anything off my to-do list today yet.  I sure seem to be stringing lot of non-productive days together.  Good thing I don’t have anything that has to be done.

Sure could take a nap this afternoon – I still may go lay down for a bit.  I was sleeping really good this morning when I got a text at 7:15 which woke me up.  I couldn’t go back to sleep after that.  One blessing from waking up that early is I got to see the sunrise.  Winter sunrises are spectacular on the prairie.

I have somewhere to go in the morning for a couple of hours but will have empty space in the afternoon.  Maybe tomorrow will be the day I can get something done.  I did get the trash pulled down to the end of the driveway for pickup tomorrow.  That counts as a half-mile walk – better than nothing I guess.

Last night I rolled over in bed and hit my bunion on the footboard of the bed.  It is very tender to the touch today.  It was a bit sore when I was walking to the mailbox.  I’ll be glad to get it taken care of and an anxious to see how the doctor proposes to do that when I go in two weeks.  Some nights I can’t sleep because my foot aches and the bunion part is so tender that even the weight of the blanket makes it hurt.

Sitting in my peaceful valley today.  Can’t figure out why I don’t have any motivation to get anything done but decided to just allow it to be what it is and not push myself.  Maybe my body just needs rest.  It has been a crazy couple of months around here.

Grateful for finding a trainer, grateful for empty space that allows me to “be”, and grateful for mild winter weather.

Got my car taken care of today.  I had the oil changed and the tires rotated.  As part of the oil change they vacuum and wash my car.  I almost didn’t recognize it when they were done.

Ran a few errands while I was in town.  I was gone for almost four hours which is two hours longer than I had planned.  Everything seemed to take longer than normal today.  Glad I got through my list.  The only thing I didn’t get was a new rain gauge – Walmart doesn’t carry them in the winter time I found out.  I was tired by then and didn’t stop somewhere else.

It has been a quiet afternoon at home.  I finished putting together a puzzle I had started yesterday.  That gave me a moment of feeling like I did something today.  I didn’t get anything else I was going to do done however.  It can all wait till another day I guess.  Maybe I’ll get motivated and do something yet tonight.

Tomorrow a personal trainer is coming to my house for a meet and greet.  I trust I will like her.  Setting up the appointment wasn’t easy though so I am cautious about her.  She didn’t communicate very easily.  I’ll see how she is in person.

The chickens gave me 10 eggs today.  I have three extra dozen if anyone needs eggs.  It was so warm today I thought about cleaning out the chicken coop but am thinking we still will get some winter weather.  I use the deep straw method during the winter and add fresh straw on top of the dirty straw each month.  It is always deep by spring and that first clean out is a hard one.  AFter that I clean it out once a month and those don’t take long.  The deep straw adds heat to the coop for cold winter days and nights.

Later this week I will need to replenish my chicken and dog feed as I am going out of town next week.  I buy a month’s supply at a time and am starting to run low.  I might have enough to make it through next week but don’t want to ask the pet sitter to have to go get some.  I think I spend more on critter feed than I do my own groceries.

Got a reminder that it is time to take Star in for her annual visit.  She is not leash trained and it is always an adventure taking her in.  I usually ask for the first appointment of the day so the office isn’t full of other animals.  Last time I took her in she pulled her collar off and went running through their office.  Maybe I need to find a vet that does house calls.

Still in my peaceful valley.  Life seems easy right now although my energy level is not as high as I would like it to be.  Not sure why my energy level has slipped down again.  Thinking I got too busy for a bit and my body just needs some quiet, down time to recharge.  I was able to hike over six miles Saturday so when I demand my body to move it does so.

Grateful for a clean car that has fresh oil and rotated tires, grateful for my productive chickens supplying me with a bounty of fresh eggs, and grateful winter weather has taken a long vacation.

 

What a lazy day this has been.  I woke up early but stayed in bed.  Got up to pee and take my thyroid pill and went back to bed.  Never did go to sleep but didn’t feel like getting up.  Wrote a long letter while I was in bed.  Finally got up around 11:00.  Took my shower and fixed breakfast.  I haven’t accomplished anything else today except to throw a load of laundry in and fold one load.

Thinking I need a rest and relax day today.  Seems like I need lots of those types of days these days.  I may even go take a nap this afternoon.  Feeling like I could sleep if I went to bed.  Talk about a lazy day!

Tomorrow I have an appointment to get the oil changed in my car.  AFterwards I will go into Emporia to have the tires rotated and pick up a few groceries.  At least those two things will get me up and moving tomorrow.

Tuesday I have an appointment with a personal trainer.  A friend recommended the trainer to me.  We will have a meet and greet to see if she is the one for me.  One of my personal goals this year is to get my body into better shape.  I can walk for six miles and more easily but I don’t have much muscle strength.  I have lots of saggy skin from the weight loss and am thinking it would look better if I had some muscle. I have never been able to stick to a physical fitness plan other than the walking I did to train for the Camino.  Maybe this will be my year for that to finally happen.  I hope to work with a personal trainer weekly for at lest the first half of the year until I can learn what I am to do to accomplish my goal.  I tried a trainer another time and it didn’t work.  Trusting this time I will have better luck.

Thursday evening is my first meeting to find out what my new volunteer job will involve.  I don’thave much information yet about it so am excited to find out what the training will be like and how much time commitment is required.  I have several small trips planned and need to make sure I can honor my commitment to them before I go too much further.

Sure glad the weather was nicer yesterday than it is today.  The wind is in a big hurry today and although it is in the 50’s outside it doesn’t feel like it is.  The sun comes and goes behind some cloud cover today.  Sure lucked out yesterday and had a perfect hiking day.

Trying to drink some extra water today.  For some reason I feel a bit dehydrated today.  I always forget to carry water with me when I hike.  The hike may have caused me to be a bit dehydrated today.

There is a chance my Marine may be coming back to stay with me.  He is hoping to find out this week if that might happen.  I don’t have any guests booked until April right now.  It would be nice to have company again – this house can feel mighty big and empty when I am here by myself.

Sitting in my peaceful valley today although I can feel some restlessness in the background.  Allowing it to be what it is and remembering not to write a story about it in my head.  If I can honor the feelings and allow them to be what they are they pass much quicker.  Choosing to stay present in this very moment also helps.  I find my mind trying to figure out the future sometimes and if I can bring it back to this moment in time I feel more grace and ease with myself.  Sometimes that is easier said than done though.

Grateful for a lazy day at home alone, grateful for my mentors and teachers that have taught me skills that I can use to make my life more full of grace and ease, and grateful for possibilities of all sorts that lay ahead of me.

 

My Match guy left for his home late this afternoon.  He had wanted to get on the road headed home by 3:00 but it was closer to 5:00 before he left.  Neither one of us wanted him to leave.

We took a six-mile hike at the Tallgrass Prairie Preserve this afternoon.  65 degrees in January is perfect hiking weather.  We walked out to Windmill Pasture and the buffalo were right by the side of the road.  When they started acting like they might want to cross the road we were on we walked on.  We sat down about a mile up the road from the buffalo and talked for a bit.  Turned around and walked back.

On the way back we ran into two guys hiking.  We talked with them all the way back to our cars.  Made the walk back go really fast and easy.  One of the two we met has tickets to the Symphony in June.  I gave him my business card in case he wants to book a room.  So far that weekend I only have one of the four guest rooms booked.

Am doing some laundry and have a load of dishes running.  I need to get my house back into order a bit.  I was noticing this afternoon I need to do the floors in the kitchen and living room again.  May or may not get that done tonight as I am tired tonight.  I slept over six hours straight last night and am more tired than normal tonight.  That usually happens when I get more sleep than I am used to.  Maybe I can repeat that tonight and get two good night’s sleep back-to-back.

Nothing on my calendar I have to do tomorrow.  Next week is starting to fill in though and I have something everyday to do.  That is unusual for me but I’m glad I will be busy.  The house feels very big and empty tonight with me home alone again.

Sure had a fun couple of days with my Match guy.  We really didn’t do anything special – just hung around the house and did some hiking.  I enjoy the simple pleasures of life and so does he.  The weather was perfect to be out today.  We enjoyed the sunset and stars last night and the sunrise this morning.

I’m going to his house the middle of January so we can go to a concert together.  Plan on staying a couple of nights although I’m not sure what my definite plans are yet.  Still over a week away so I will figure it out when it gets closer.

Spending time with him makes me understand why finding a companion is important to me.  Life is so much more fun when you do it with someone you enjoy being with.  Wish we didn’t live so far away but maybe that is good as we have to make the best of the time together we do get.  In between face-to-face time we email, text and talk on the phone.  Somehow those conversations are different from the ones I have in person with him.

We are both taking this nice and slow and will see how it all unfolds for the future.  So far we haven’t found much to disagree about.  I’m sure those things will be uncovered in time.  Then we have to ask ourselves if one can live with our differences.

Grateful for the beautiful hike to see the buffalo up close and personal today, grateful for the time I had with my Match guy this week, and grateful for sleep last night.  May it find me again soon!

Another post a day late.  Had a wonderful day with my Match guy Friday.  We were lazy and didn’t even have breakfast until 11:00.  We finished putting together the 1,000 piece puzzle late last night.

We went to the Chase County Fishing Lake and walked across the dam to see the waterfalls.  They are running and were beautiful.  Went down to Pioneer Bluffs and toured the grounds there.  We had dinner at Ad Astra.

The stars were out in full force last night so went outside after we got home from dinner and looked at the stars.  We had watched the sunset earlier.

He will be going home sometime early afternoon.  I will miss him.  We have had another wonderful time together not doing much.  We both like silence and are comfortable sitting in silence together.  That is nice.  He makes me laugh so we shared many moments of laughter and fun.

The house will seem big and empty to me after he leaves today.  I’m going to his house in two weeks to go to a symphony concert.  I’m glad to know when I get to spend time with him again.

Grateful for a walk to the beautiful waterfalls, grateful for watching the sunset and seeing the stars with my Match guy, and grateful for this time we got to spend together.

This is a late entry as I am actually writing it early morning on Friday.  Yesterday got busy and I didn’t take the time to write.

My Match guy is here so my time was spent with him.  After a late breakfast I got the house ready for a Pioneer Bluffs Committee meeting that was held at my house in the afternoon.  We had a good meeting and got some plans in place for events that will be held during the first half of 2019.

After the meeting guests left my Match guy and I took a three-mile walk.  We were out walking while the sun set.  The colors were amazing again last night.  It was a bit brisk outside but felt good to get out and walk.  A car drove by while we were walking and stopped to make sure we were OK.  I appreciate the locals doing that.

After our walk we fixed dinner and then started putting a puzzle together.  We spent a quiet evening putting the puzzle together.

It was nice to spend a quiet day at home with him.  We have fun doing nothing together.

Grateful for a long walk yesterday, grateful for a beautiful sunset and grateful for a chance to spend more time with my Match guy.

My Match guy will be here any minute so this may be a short blog!  I have ham and bean soup ready and the cornbread is in the oven.  The house smells divine!

Delivered Chad’s Christmas treats to him today.  I only recognized one McDonald’s employee at the Turnpike store.  Sat and visited with Chad for about an hour.  Good thing his boss didn’t mind him visiting while he was working.

Stopped by and got some groceries and came home.  Dropped off my recycling stuff on the way home.  Had double the normal amount as I had driven around with the first batch in the back of my car for over a week.  Finally remembered to drop it all off today.

Cleaned the guest bedroom and bathroom as well as touched up the rest of the upstairs.  The house is all clean and ready for my guest tonight.

Sophia ran past me down the driveway chasing a stray cat this afternoon when I was out doing chicken chores.  Not sure what is up with her shock collar – maybe the thrill of chasing a cat overrode the shock she should have received leaving the yard.  The other two dogs didn’t follow her.

Grateful my Match guy will be here soon, grateful the new recipe for ham and bean soup turned out delicious and grateful more Christmas treats left the house today.

Happy New Year’s Day!  It is a cloudy, very cold day on the prairie.  At least the wind has slowed down a bit this afternoon.  My guests wanted to go to the Tallgrass Prairie Preserve this morning to watch the sunrise.  They wisely decided to stay in bed and watch the sky lighten a bit instead as it was too cloudy to see the sunrise.  They left around 9:00 and were going to go on a hike.  The wind was in a big hurry this morning.  Hope they didn’t freeze on the prairie this morning.

They were a nice young couple.  They stayed in all night.  They had brought some champagne and snacks and they watched Milo and Otis.  That is about the most exciting movie I own!  They like to get away to some place quiet on New Year’s Eve and celebrate the new year together quietly.  My type of people!

I fell asleep around 11:00.  My Match guy called at midnight at my request.  We talked for a few minutes and then I went back to sleep.  I was able to sleep in until 8:30 this morning although I didn’t sleep straight through.   I did get more sleep than I normally get.  Trusting 2019 will be the year I solve my sleep issue.

It has been a lazy day again for me.  I started working on my taxes last night but haven’t gotten back to them today yet.  I have sheets in the dryer but haven’t gotten the guest bed made up yet.  Not much motivation to do much again today.  I did get my chicken chores done.  The girls gave me 12 eggs on this very cold day.  They even came out for their lettuce treat.  They have more motivation than I do.  I do have a loaf of banana bread baking.  Had some bananas that needed worked up and banana bread freezes easily.  I won’t eat it but it is nice to have a loaf on hand in case I need to offer something to guests.

A friend gave me the name of a personal trainer.  I sent the trainer a message but haven’t heard back from her yet.  Trusting I can find someone who will help me get an exercise plan set up and teach me how to do the exercises properly.  One of my two goals for this year is to build my core strength and build some muscle.  Hopefully it will help make all the sagging skin look better.  The main reason I want to do it though is so I have the strength to lift the chicken and dog feed sacks easily and to be able to walk even further than I can now.

My Match guy is coming to visit me tomorrow.  He had originally planned to come Thursday but moved it up a day.  We are both anxious to see each other again.  He will stay until Saturday.  It will be fun to spend more time with him.  He makes me laugh and laughter is a good thing for me.

Thursday afternoon a committee from Pioneer Bluffs is meeting in my house for our committee meeting.  I am almost finished with my commitment to Pioneer Bluffs.  My last Board meeting is January 12.  I will continue to volunteer for them but not be on the board.  Board work is not my cup of tea.

I shut the garage door with the dogs inside last night so the garage would be a bit warmer for them.  It was nice not to hear the dogs barking all night long.  May need to shut that door more often.  They hang out under the heat lamp on some blankets in the garage when it gets really cold.  I happened to see all  three of them under the heat lamp last night so I was able to shut them in.

I am going to fix ham and bean soup tomorrow for dinner.  Still have some ham left over from Christmas and Nicole gave me a good recipe so thought I would try fixing the soup a bit differently than I normally do.  It will be cold enough tomorrow that a hot soup for dinner will sound good.  Need to give some thought about what to fix for Thursday and Friday night since my guy will be here.  I normally eat the same thing every meal – not sure he would appreciate that.

Glad the New Year is here and the holidays are officially over.  Once January is done I always feel spring is close.  Counting the days until Spring already!  Guess I have a case of Spring Fever.

Sit sitting in my peaceful valley although the road through my valley today has felt a bit rocky.  Working to remind myself to stay present to what is and not get ahead of myself into the future.  When I stay present all is well!  What more can a girl ask for?  I don’t have a crystal ball and to look into the future and get nervous is silly.  Who knows what might happen?  Someone told me to “choose every moment”.  That feels like it has movement to it and I like that idea.  Right here, right now I choose to be present in this very moment and be grateful for all I have.  Beyond that who knows what may happen but I do know that right here, right now all is well!

Grateful for a good night’s sleep, grateful for lazy days, and grateful that right here, right now all is well!

My guests left early this morning.  Last night they didn’t think they would leave before 8:00 but they got gone before 7:30.  I came out in my pajamas to tell them goodbye.  He hugged me and is planning on returning in May when he comes to KS to turkey hunt.  They also booked a room for December 2019 when they return for her family Christmas.  They left the sweetest thank you note for me.  I love when my guests come as strangers and leave as friends.

I got their bedroom and bathroom cleaned today as I have two more guests coming in this evening.  They didn’t think they would be here until 9:00 pm.  I hope they can find my road – it is hard for me to find at night.  Not sure if they will be staying in tonight or if they are coming to go to a party nearby.  Check-out is at 11:00 tomorrow morning so they won’t be here long.

My baby brother Keith and his son Abraham came to pick up some New Year’s Cookies I had made.  I also gave them some fudge and left over cookies.  I have one more delivery to make and then most of the goodies will be out of the house.

It is a cloudy, windy, wet day on the prairie today.  Not looking forward to walking down to take care of the chickens.  I have to fill their water container every other day but think I will fill it today as it is to be bitter cold tomorrow.  That way if their door gets frozen shut they won’t run out of water.  The high tomorrow is only to be 20 with a wind chill pulling it down even more.  No precipitation is predicted at this point but that seems to keep changing.  Earlier today snow was predicted for Thursday this week but now that has been taken out of the forecast.

No plans for tonight as I don’t know what my guests will be doing.  Some guests I feel comfortable leaving them in the house alone and others not so much.  I never know which way I will feel until I meet them in person.  I am not a party person anyways so doubt that I would have gone out even if I didn’t have guests coming – especially since it is to be really cold tonight.  I am a wimp when it comes to getting out in winter weather.

Trying to convince myself to make it to town to get groceries today.  I won’t want to get out tomorrow in the bitter cold.  Maybe after I take care of the chickens I can convince myself to go.

Need to clean my living room and kitchen a bit more.  I think the guests are staying upstairs in the room with the queen bed but need to check the room with the double bed in case they decide they want to stay downstairs where it is more private.

May start working on my taxes this afternoon and tomorrow.  I got my planner so I can start filling in the blanks and pulling information together.  I like getting that task done in early February so it is done before the tax preparers get really busy.

Feeling much better today than I was yesterday.  Taking a long hike with my guest yesterday afternoon helped blow the cobwebs out and changed my mood for the better.  We were out walking during the sunset.  It was one of the top ten sunsets ever last night and even more beautiful viewed from the openness of the Tallgrass Prairie Preserve.  Back to feeling my normal self and so looking forward to 2019 and the changes it will bring me.

Grateful for guests that become friends, grateful this house cleans easily, and grateful I live close to the Tallgrass Prairie Preserve so I can hike there and clear my head and fill my soul.

 

New Year’s Eve!  Time to do a final reflection of 2018 and look forward to 2019.

I started 2018 with a lot of doubt about my thyroid cancer that had been discovered after the removal of my thyroid in October, 2017. I had gone to MD Anderson Cancer Center in December 2017 for a second opinion about further treatment options and was waiting the results of that visit.  I had gone to Peru in December 2017 and had taken Ayahuasca and San Pedro and had done a lot of self-healing and purging.

I finally got the results and recommendation from MD Anderson mid January.  To my relief they changed the type of cancer from the scary type to the common type and their official recommendation was no further treatment was needed.  That validated what the Shaman had told me in Peru.

On February 11 2018 I stopped eating any food products that contain any sort of flour and any sort of sugar.  I had done some research and had come to the conclusion that sugar can cause cancer to grow (not saying that it causes cancer to start) and for me to be able to give up sugar permanently I also needed to give up flour to cut down the cravings for sugar.  I am proud to say it has been a successful journey and to my knowledge have not eaten foods that contain flour or sugar.  When one eats out you never know for sure but I do my best to order clean food.  I lost 50 pounds as a result and am smaller than I have been since I was in high school.  I had lost 20 pounds in 2017 so am down 70 pounds from my all time high.

I had a bit of heart problems in April.  However after all the tests were done the Cardiologist dismissed me from his care in August.  In hind site it felt like I was having a reset to my heart and all is now well with it.

In May I went to Spain, France and Italy with Nicole.  My favorite spots on that trip were Tuscany Valley in Italy along with Venice and Florence.  I didn’t care for Rome or Paris.  I am a small town girl at heart and have learned I prefer the smaller towns and the countryside to the bigger cities.  Many memories were made and it was a fabulous adventure.

The summer was one full of guests.  I only had two or three nights a month when I didn’t have a guest in my house from June through November.  The first summer of doing the AIrbnb was a great success.  I met so many nice people – some of whom have become good friends.  I especially fell in love with my Marine and his wife.  He stayed for six months with me and now feels like one of my kids.  There is a chance he may return in 2019 if he gets an assignment close by.

In November Nicole and I traveled together again – this time to Australia and New Zealand.  Of the four trips we have taken together I have to say this was my favorite sight-seeing adventure.  The countryside was beautiful.  Snorkeling in the Great Barrier Reef and seeing the fairy penguins come ashore on Phillips Island were the two highlights of the trip for me.

December found me traveling with my Match guy for over two weeks.  We explored CO and NM and had a grand adventure.  We are still seeing each other and text, call or email daily.  We are finding ways to be together – either he comes to my house or I go to his.  He may help 2019 be a very good year for me!

I don’t really set New Year’s Resolutions.  I honor Winter Solstice and set intentions for myself that way.  2019 is the year for me to secure “we”.  I have done lots of inner work on myself.  I have secured No, Done and I.  Now it is time for We.

In addition to We I want to become physically fit and strong.  I need to find a trainer and get myself in better physical shape.  Losing the weight has helped me want to become more active and move my body more.  I can easily walk 4 – 6 miles without becoming tired.  But I don’t have a lot of body strength and muscle and want to work on building my core strength.  If anyone knows of a good personal trainer let me know!

So looking forward to 2019 and the changes and adventures it will bring me.  I am ready for change!  Bring it on 2019!

 

 

Another night of little sleep.  This is getting old again!  I am tired today and have little motivation to do anything.  I went back to bed around 10:45 and slept for an hour.  I will take what ever sleep I can find at this point.

I was going to deliver my brother’s New Year’s Cookies to them today but can’t find the motivation to do so.  I will go to town tomorrow and take them.  Need to go down and give the chickens some water but am procrastinating by writing instead.  Where did my get up and go runaway too?

Got the house cleaned up and the trees taken down yesterday evening.  Christmas 2018 is officially in my rear view mirror.  I’m glad it is over.  My spirits are a bit low today – probably from all the fun yesterday.  Thinking my body is just tired and is asking for extra rest.  Other than taking care of my guests today, cleaning their room tomorrow after they check out and then checking in the ones coming in tomorrow I don’t have anything on my calendar until Thursday.

Feels like all I have done lately is sit and do nothing.  I don’t like cold weather and have been staying inside too much.  My guest said he was going to come back to the house around 4:00 today and ask if I would take a hike with him.  I’ll see if he shows up or not.  It will do me good to get out and move my body.  It is in the mid 40’s with bright blue skies.  The wind is in a bit of a hurry though so feels a bit colder than it is.  If I go for a walk I’ll have to dress warmly.

My left foot is still bothering me.  I don’t see the foot doctor until Jan 22.  I will be anxious to hear what he has to say.  The bunion part of my foot feels better if I don’t wear shoes and put pressure on any part of the big toe.  However, where I had the neuromas removed likes me to wear shoes or the bottom of my foot aches.  I might dig out my flip-flops and try those to see if I can please both parts of my foot.

I sound like a bitch today – I just reread what I have written so far and all I have done is complain.  After Christmas blues have struck.  Funny since I don’t like Christmas and don’t do much to celebrate it.  Betting it has more to do with the short days.  I keep reminding myself everyday is a little bit longer and the light is returning.

Got my tax planner in the mail yesterday so I can start pulling my information together to get ready to have my taxes done.  I like to take them in the first part of February so they are done and out-of-the-way.  Wondering how the new tax law will impact me this year.

I have volunteered to be a volunteer tax preparer for AARP.  I go to my first meeting Jan 10 to find out what I have to do and get my training process started.  I have been looking for a volunteer position and this one feels important and one that will use my skills.  I have no idea how much time I will have to commit to yet.  Should have some answers after my meeting Jan 10.  I do plan on being gone off and on so am trusting they can work around that or else I will have to back out.

My tummy is feeling a bit unsettled today.  I made myself eat lunch but am thinking maybe that wasn’t a good idea.  It is making all sorts of sounds and is singing to me.  I had ham yesterday and I don’t normally eat ham.  I was able to avoid eating any Christmas treats.  I’ll be glad when they are all out of the house.

Still haven’t gotten out my Christmas cards.  I need to dig them out and set them on the counter so I dom’t forget about them.  Maybe I should have gotten Valentine cards and sent those instead.  Not sure why I procrastinate on things like that like I do.  It really doesn’t take that long to do them.  I have spent more time thinking about doing them then it would have taken to do them.

One of those days I guess.  Better days ahead!  Today is just a tired and cranky pants day.  I’ll stay away from people so I don’t spread my sour mood to others.  Tomorrow will be a good day.

Grateful to be able to go back to bed when I needed to this morning, grateful for the quiet afternoon, and grateful this day is over half done!

Christmas 2018 is a wrap!  The kids, Craig and his girlfriend Nancy and the grandkids came over for lunch and presents.  We had a fun afternoon together.  I still have some dishes to do and a bit of clean-up to do and the house will be back in order.  I will take the Christmas trees down later today and can put Christmas 2018 in my rear-view mirror.

Still have too many Christmas treats left over.  I have enough New Year’s Cookies for my brothers left that I won’t have to make another batch.  That is a good thing!  I will deliver them tomorrow and give my brothers the left over treats too.  There is even enough fudge left that I won’t have to make another batch.  It will be good to have that stuff out of the house.  I managed to not eat a bite of the Christmas treats but need the temptation gone.

I made a big batch of ham salad with some of the leftover ham after lunch was over and sent it home with the kids.  Nicole took the ham bone home as they are going to make ham and bean soup.  Have one container of ham left that I will need to do something with.  Got rid of most of the other leftovers.

Fixed bacon and eggs for my guests this morning.  I don’t usually fix their breakfast but since I fixed dinner for him the first night he was here they expected me to fix it today.  No big deal – I have plenty of eggs and bacon on hand.  I have enjoyed my guests again.  They invited me to stay with them if I am ever in western NE.

Glad I didn’t clean house before the day started.  Sitting in my chair with the sun shining in through the west windows I am seeing lots of things I need to dust and am seeing all the dirt on the floor. Cookie crumbs, popcorn, etc got dropped from the days celebration and had I cleaned it this morning I would have had to clean it again tonight anyways.

We did a grab bag type of Christmas for the adults this year.  Seemed to have worked nicely and everyone didn’t have to buy so many presents.  Everyone already has so much stuff that no one really needs anything.  There was a nice assortment of gifts brought and it was fun watching people open them.  The kids opened their gifts while we were doing the exchange.  They each made out like bandits and enjoyed their gifts too.

I feel a big sense of relief that Christmas is over.  It is my least favorite holiday season.  I always get a bit depressed during this season.  Probably due more to Solstice and the darkest day than Christmas itself.  But Christmas has way too many expectations that seem to come with it and the commercialization of Christmas turns my stomach.  I try each year to simplify what I do and give.

Now I can turn my attention to the New Year. 2019 feels like it is off to a great start.  My Match guy is coming Thursday evening to spend two nights.  It will be good to see him again.   We have a lot to talk about.  I am planning on going to see him for a couple of days the middle of January.  He has tickets to a symphony concert and he wants me to go to the concert with him.  My life is certainly not boring these days!

Was good to see Craig and his girlfriend today.  Craig and I talked briefly and we both agreed we are both happier than we have been for a long time.  I am happy that we can celebrate Christmas as a family together and everyone feels comfortable.  Not all divorced couples can do that.  I shared with Craig that I had met someone.  He wished me well just as I had wished him well when he told me about his girlfriend.

Feeling a bit empty this afternoon.  It was a bit chaotic and loud in the house for a bit today when everyone was here.  The house feels very big and empty this afternoon.  My guests are out and about and probably won’t be home until late evening.  I will slow things down and take my time finishing up the cleaning and putting the trees away. I have empty space on my calendar except for caring for my guests and preparing for the guests coming the 31st.  I am sure I will get refilled quickly.

The sun is shining this afternoon which always lifts my spirits.  The grandkids helped me gather 10 eggs while they were here.  The wind has slowed down and it is beautiful although cold out.  I need to walk down and get the mail and get some fresh air.  That will help lift my spirits too.

Grateful everyone was able to come for the day and share Christmas together, grateful Christmas 2018 is done, and grateful for the possibilities 2019 is bringing to me.  Time to look forward to all the changes headed my way.  Feeling like I need to fasten my seat belt and enjoy the ride!

Another night of not much sleep.  I was really tired last night and was hoping for good sleep.  I slept for two hours and then was up most of the night.  Darn!  I’m tired today.  May take a nap later.

Went into Emporia this morning after my guests got up and left the house.  I finished my Christmas shopping and picked up a few groceries.  Still need to bag and wrap the gifts to get ready for tomorrow but I am oh so close to being ready now.

My guest ask if I would go hike with him this afternoon at the Tallgrass Prairie Preserve.  I told him I would go for a short hike.  It is only in the mid 20’s and the wind is still in a big hurry.  I’ll have to wear my heavy overalls if we go.  I’m not sure if he was serious or not.  I’ll see if he returns and wants to go.

Still need to make my New Year’s Cookies.  I got tired last night and decided not to make them.  I’ll make them this afternoon once I know if the walk is on or not.  I want some for Jason tomorrow as they are one of his holiday favorites.  The other two kids can take them or leave them.

Remembered to buy myself an electric knife today.  I’m not sure what happened to the one I had.  I must have given it to Craig when I divided the kitchen after the divorce.  I am fixing a whole ham tomorrow and it is easier to cut with an electric knife.

Lost the extra weight I had picked up.  Back down to my lowest weight this morning. My BMI was 19.5 so am at the lower limit of where I want to go.  I’m surprised the weight came back off as I have not been moving my body much lately.  This dance of weight is a challenge for me right now.  The more active I am the more I can eat but it is hard to know how much to add without adding too much or too little.

I will be glad when Christmas season is over.  I will probably take the trees down tomorrow afternoon after everyone leaves.  I do not like Christmas and am always happy when it is over.

Still want to make one more batch of fudge but I need the sun to shine for that.  Thought this afternoon was going to be clear but so far it is still cloudy.  May not get it made until Sunday.

Sitting in my sleepy, peaceful valley this afternoon.  Life feels easy again and like I am in the flow. Trusting tomorrow will go easy and will be fun for all that come.  It is always good to see all three of my kids at the same time.  I want to try to get some pictures taken tomorrow – I usually forget for us to do that.

Grateful my Christmas shopping is done, grateful I lost the extra weight I had gained, and grateful for my peacefully valley.  I trust I can hang out in it for a bit and completely refill and recharge my soul.

Had lunch with my neighbor today.  Always good to catch up with her.  I enjoy our conversation and friendship.

I had ordered the grandkids their Christmas gifts and both packages were delivered today.  I cut that a bit close.  Glad I will have something to give them.

Ran into Emporia to pick up three other Christmas gifts.  Getting close to being ready for our family Christmas on Saturday.  Need to make a final decision tomorrow as to what to get and get it done.  Will need to wrap a few things and then I will be ready.

When I got home from lunch my neighbor dropped me off at the end of my driveway so I could wrestle the trash can up the drive.  The wind was blowing around 35 MPH and it was spitting ice pellets.  I think that was the longest driveway walk I have taken out here.  My ears were frozen by the time I got to the house.  The trash can has bad wheels and in the wind it was hard to keep it upright to pull.  My hands are still cold from the attempt.  I got it done though.

The wife of my guest showed up as I was returning from Emporia.  They are nice people.  I enjoyed the conversation I had with the husband last night and this morning.  Feels weird to have guests in the house again.  I hadn’t had others except for my Marine since October.  This couple leaves Monday and another couple arrives for one night Monday evening.  So far I don’t have anyone else booked until April.  That feels OK to me right now.

It was raining hard when my guest showed up last night.  He had lots of stuff to unload from his truck so I had him park in the garage.  I had to move my car to the other side so his long, big truck would fit in the garage.  I gave him my garage door opener so he can come and go as needed.  I sure trust I remember to get the opener back from him before he leaves.

The wind is in a big hurry this afternoon.  The windows are shaking and the swings are rocking hard.  It is only in the mid 30’s.  The forecast had told me it would reach the 50’s today but there is no way that is going to happen.  I’m glad we didn’t get the snow Western KS got today.

I need to get brave and go down and take care of the chickens.  At least I don’t have to fill their water container today – just need to take them their lettuce and gather eggs.  I may need rocks in my pockets to get down to the coop without being blown over.

The dogs are muddy critters today.  They must have been rolling in the mud puddles in the back yard.  I still have water standing in the back yard.  They have been hanging out under the heat lamp in the garage this afternoon.

May get my New Year’s Cookies made this evening.  It is a good day to be standing over a hot pan of grease.  If I get them made I can get them delivered to my brothers on Friday.  They seem to enjoy them each year.  I always give them some fudge too – both recipes are from my mother.  Trying to carry on that family tradition while I can.

Ready for the sun to come back from the vacation it has been on the last couple of days.  Winter has arrived on the prairie.  Trusting it will be short-lived and allow the sun to return with a bit of warmth.  I don’t like cold weather.

Need to go get busy and get a few things off my list done.  I have been rather lazy this week and haven’t done much.  My body seemed to need rest this week after all the excitement and adventures I have had for the last two months.  Finally feeling better and more rested and centered.

Grateful for neighbors that become good friends, grateful for guests that become friends, and grateful for this time of year when getting together with family is important and we make happen.

 

 

Went into Emporia this morning to run some errands and get a haircut.  Tried to get a pet collar fixed but the lady at the store didn’t know any more about them than I did.  Her boss was supposed to be there at 11:00 so I left and went back after my haircut.  The boss wasn’t there yet so came home.  I had purposely purchased the collars in town so I could get help if I needed it.  That plan didn’t work out.  I could have saved a lot of money if I had ordered them on-line to start with.  So much for local service.

While I was driving home a relation of the couple staying here tonight called to tell me he left a package for my guests on my front porch.  I was a bit anxious coming home as I was afraid the dogs would open it.  Luckily he left it on the front porch of my neighbor’s house.  It was wet but safe.  I text him to let him know he left it at the wrong house and to let the guests know to come to the right house tonight.  I put in the directions what color my house is and which way to turn on the driveway.  Guess they don’t read all of the directions.

Need to do a bit more housecleaning this afternoon.  Also want to make another batch of chocolate dipped peanut butter balls and Ritz cracker/peanut butter things.  Then my holiday baking will be done unless I decide to do one more batch of fudge.  Can’t do fudge today – need a sunshiny day to make it turn out right.

Heard it start to rain around 4:00 this morning.  The rain stopped for the most part while I was in town but now it is very foggy and misty out.  More rain is headed my way according to the forecast. I went to check how much rain I had gotten this morning and found my rain gauge was gone.  Not sure how long it has been missing.  Will have to add one to my list and pick one up next time I am in town.  I like knowing how much rain I get.

Time to give some serious thought about our family Christmas that is happening Saturday.  As of right now I have two presents ordered but not here yet.  Still have some decisions to make and some gifts to figure out.  Nothing like waiting till the last-minute.  I keep changing my mind what to do for my kids.  Time to decide and make it happen.

I was concerned about yesterday.  It was the first Christmas Day that I spent totally alone all day.  Had a couple of phone calls and texts but didn’t see anyone else.  I did much better than I thought I would do with it.

Sitting in my peaceful, quiet valley today.  Feels like something has shifted inside again – in a good way.  I feel calm, balanced and life seems easy today.  Major changes are coming my way and I feel energized about them.  Time to take some risks and do things a bit differently than I have been.

Grateful for the pick-me-up a haircut always gives me, grateful for the rain the prairie is receiving today, and grateful for the changes that are coming my way.  Helps to keep life interesting.

Merry Christmas to one and all!  Trusting your day unfolded in a beautiful way for you.

I have spent a quiet day at home.  I didn’t sleep lots last night so I took a nap today.  It  is a beautiful day on the prairie today.  After I finish blogging I am going to go out and do chicken chores and take a walk.  Rain is to come in tonight and tomorrow and then it is to cool down a bit.  Need to take advantage of this beautiful day and get outside and move my body.

I charged the dog collars today and found one of them isn’t working.  I will have to go to town tomorrow and see if the store I purchased them at can help me fix it.  Not sure why the second dog was able to get through the electronic fence.  I put the collars on a bit tighter to see if that will help.

Did some housecleaning this morning.  Have a bit more to do but am almost ready for my guests to arrive tomorrow evening.

Plan on making some more Christmas treats when I get done with my walk.  I have the ingredients and need to use them up.  The kids will usually take home the leftovers for me so things don’t go to waste.

For some reason I have gained four pounds this week.  I haven’t been eating off plan so am not sure what is going on.  I did eat rice Sunday night and Soy Sauce.  Maybe that did it.  Grains don’t seem to agree with my body.  I felt very bloated last night.  It seems to be better today.  I’ll have to get my suggested menu out and double-check that I am not eating something not on plan if the weight doesn’t come back off quickly.  I haven’t had this happen before so am not sure what is going on.  It could be I have been lazy the last couple of days and haven’t moved my body much.

Ellexia FaceTime me and gave me a video tour of her presents.  She got a new phone so she called me on it so I would have her new number.  She likes to talk to me and share her day with me.  I enjoy talking to her.  Actually I don’t talk much – I just listen to her talk.

Kathy called me this morning and we had a nice visit.  Always good to hear from her.  She is having a grand time seeing her grandchildren and children.

‘Tis the time of year for reflection and planning for 2019.  It feels like 2019 will be a big year full of change for me.  I’m excited to see where 2019 may take me.  Time for me to break out of another box or two that has felt closed around me.  Time for me to get out into the world more and connect with others in a more meaningful way.

Grateful for this beautiful Christmas Day full of peace and quiet, grateful for family, and grateful for the potential 2019 offers me.

Sure doesn’t feel like Christmas Eve to me.  We are having our family Christmas this Saturday.  I haven’t caught my Christmas spirit yet – maybe by Saturday I will find some.

Went into Emporia around noon today to get groceries.  I waited longer than I should have to go to town and it was crazy busy.  I got what I needed and got out-of-town quickly.  I had thought about getting something for lunch while I was in town but decided to get out of town.  Too many people for my liking today.

Finished putting the puzzle together I had been working on.  Still haven’t gotten any cleaning done but I am getting my laundry done.  At least I can say I did something today – right?

I have been tired the last few days.  It hit me today I am feeling like I did when I first started Bright Line Eating.  I must have been eating some sugar and flour on all my travels and am going back through a detox process of some sort.  Trusting it will be short-lived and my energy will return quickly.  I fell asleep in my chair for a bit this afternoon – woke myself up snoring.  I hate when that happens!

Did a meditation this morning and thought about 2019 and what changes I want to make in the New Year.  I want to add in some strength training of some sort – haven’t decided what that will look like yet.  Also have another big change I am contemplating making.  I will do some research on it after the first of the year and see where it goes.  Time for me to change things up again.

Two of the three dogs got through the electronic fence barrier again today.  I am going to have to walk the yard and see where they are getting through.  Maybe the charge on their collars is not holding for two weeks and I need to start charging the collars more often.  I’ll have to investigate what is breaking down and get it fixed so they don’t get run over.

Received a gift today.  Something is happening tonight and tomorrow that feels like a strong message to me.  I feel like I have been given permission to make a big change now.  I smile when I think about it as I’m sure that isn’t how the person involved meant for me to interpret their action as.  I will take my lessons from the Universe in however they show up.  This one feels right on several levels.  2019 may turn into an interesting year for me.  Bring it on – I am ready to make some major changes.

Things are still going well with my Match guy.  We continue to text, email and talk to each other.  He will be coming to see me sometime the end of next week after his sons return home.  It will be good to see him again.

May make some more Christmas treats this evening.  Not a good day to make fudge as it is too cloudy but I can get two other treats made.  Got some oil to fry the New Year’s Cookies in so I will get those made sometime this week.  I need to deliver them along with some fudge to my two brothers that live in Lebo.  That is as close to giving them a Christmas gift as I get.

Sitting in my quiet, peaceful valley this afternoon.  I was rattled for a bit this morning until I realized what was happening was really a gift.  Makes it easier to accept their behavior when I can see it like that.

Grateful for meditation and the gifts it can bring to me, grateful for my Match guy and the way he makes me smile, and grateful for the peace and quiet of the prairie today.

I was surprised to hear it rain last night.  I had checked the forecast in the morning and nothing was predicted and hadn’t checked it again.  There was a light coating of ice on the ground this morning and it was foggy most of the morning.  The clouds have rolled on out and the sun has burned off all the ice this afternoon.  It was fairly nice out when I went out to do chores.

Got 11 eggs from my girls today.  They are earning their keep again.  It sure is more fun to gather eggs when I get a full bucket.

It has been another lazy day for me.  I have been working on the puzzle I am putting together and not getting much else done.  Good thing I don’t have much on my to-do list.  I am getting out of the house this evening to go to Ad Astra for dinner with some friends.  I haven’t been out of the house for several days so it will do me good to get out and be around people.  I think I have recovered enough that I can be around people again.  Sometimes I have to put myself into time out for the safety of those around me.

I slept like a rock last night.  I must have gotten at least six hours of sleep without waking up.  Wow!  So that is what most people do at night.  I felt well rested this morning when I got up.  I am tired this afternoon but I normally am when I get extra sleep.  My body seems to say give me even more sleep – I must be greedy!

Ordered the grandkids Christmas presents last night.  They are to arrive by Friday this week.  I will only have one day of grace as I need them by Saturday afternoon.  I cut that one too close!  May need to make a quick trip to town Saturday morning if they don’t show up on time.

Still haven’t gotten any Christmas cards fixed and in the mail.  I keep forgetting to work on them.  No big deal I guess if I don’t get them out.

Need to go to Emporia tomorrow to get some groceries.  I was going to go today and decided the stores may be less crowded tomorrow morning.  Don’t need too many things so I should be able to get in and out quickly.  Need the tires on my car rotated sometime soon – they are overdue.  Maybe I can get both accomplished tomorrow.

It has been a challenge to get back on my eating schedule since my two vacations.  I have eaten the same thing at home for several months and all of a sudden it is getting hard to eat.  Need to give some thought as to how to change it up a bit.  Sure is easier to fix meals when I know ahead of time what I am going to eat.  Grocery shopping was also much easier.  May give it another week or so and see if I can get back into my normal routine.  I got used to eating at different times each day and I ate a bigger variety of food while traveling.  I haven’t gained any weight but I liked my routine from before.  I’ll see how this plays out.  I will be glad when the Christmas treats disappear on Saturday.  I haven’t been tempted to eat them but if they are around much longer I might be.

It has been a good day today.  I haven’t even cried today – I did the last two days.  I watched the full moon rise last night.  It wasn’t visible for very long as it rose into a cloud bank.  Glad I got to see it for a few minutes before it disappeared for the night. I looked for meteors but it was cloudy again so I didn’t get to see them this time.

Grateful for lots of eggs from my girls, grateful for lazy days, and grateful for lots of sleep last night.  I almost felt “normal” for a change!

I seem to be stringing together days where I get nothing much done.    I have a puzzle going but other than making a batch of fudge and taking care of the animals I can’t say I have accomplished anything today. My body seems to want to rest and be quiet so that is what I am doing.

I didn’t see any meteors last night.  The clouds were restless and moving through the sky most of the night.  The almost full moon was bright when it wasn’t under the cover of the clouds.  I will check again tonight and see if there are any if the clouds clear out.

Jason called me this morning to let me know his step-mother passed away.  He was with his biological father when it happened.  I’m glad Jason was there but I sure hate for him to have to experience this.  Hard time of the year to lose someone.  She was a kind and funny lady and will be missed by many.  Rest In Peace Rita!

It hurts my heart to know one of my kids is hurting.  After I talked to Jason I had a good, messy cry.  Had one yesterday too.  Must be the full moon and Solstice working their magic on me.  While I was in the midst of my cry my Match guy called.  He got to see another side of me.  He was very kind and handled me well.  Sometimes a girl just has to cry to get rid of the emotion trapped inside.

I had a headache most of the day after my cry – one of several reasons I don’t like to cry.  It is finally going away.  I am tired now and sure hoping I will get a good night’s sleep.  I didn’t sleep very well last night.

Got a booking for two people who are coming New Year’s Eve.  Wonder if they are going to stay here to welcome the New Year’s or if they have a party near by to go to. They come in the day the other two leave.  I haven’t had a guest for a bit so it will be interesting to have guests again.

The two packages I had mailed arrived to their destination today – only one day later than promised.  As busy as the Post Office is this time of year I’ll take that.

Have the ingredients to make another batch of chocolate dipped peanut butter balls but haven’t found the motivation to do so yet.  I did make one batch of fudge today that looks like it turned out OK.  Still need to make at least two more batches of fudge before next Saturday.  It is one of the kids favorite Christmas treats and I like to send extra home with them.  I always make some for my two younger brothers too.

Need to get my Christmas presents for the grandkids ordered.  We are having Christmas a week from today.  I can always run to KC next week if I don’t find what I want on-line.  I don’t like to go into stores when they aren’t busy – let alone during this time of year.  It felt like I had lots of time to get them ordered but all of a sudden I am only a week away.  Time to get moving!

Sitting in my peaceful valley today.  It had a few rocks and boulders to navigate around today but came through and found my peaceful place again.  I feel my soul being slowly recharged.  It had gotten fairly empty with all my travels lately.  I always forget how much I need alone time to get fully recharged.

Grateful for the peace and quiet on the prairie and in my house, grateful and proud of my son for being present for his father, and grateful for being able to release my emotions and allowing them to be what they are.

I didn’t get home from babysitting until after 12:30 last night.  Saw several deer near the highway on the trip home.  Luckily they stayed off the road and I didn’t have to play dodge ball on the highway.  Had trouble falling asleep and if I did fall asleep I didn’t stay asleep very long.

Got up in a grumpy mood.  My Match guy text me and was able to help lift my mood a bit.  I finally was able to have a good cry and felt a bit better.  Sometimes it seems like crying is a good way to release what ever it is that I am holding on to.

I didn’t attempt to do anything today.  I could tell I wasn’t going to get much done so declared it a lazy day and did nothing.  I started a zig saw puzzle and have worked on that off and on all day.

Took a short hike this afternoon and then took a long nap.  Tonight there is a meteor shower if the clouds don’t overtake the sky and I want to go out and see if I can see any.  Tomorrow night is the full moon and today was Winter Solstice.  Thinking the energy of all of that pulled me down for a bit this morning.

My phone rang as I was waking up from my nap.  The dear friends I met on the Camino called to bust my chops about saying I was going on a retreat when I went away with my Match guy.  It is always a delight to talk to them.  They helped turned my day around.

Nothing much on my calendar for the next week.  I do need to clean the house for the guests that are arriving December 26 but I cleaned it really good before I left earlier this month so will just need to touch it up.

Nice to have a long stretch of empty space ahead of me.  I may get my income tax records updated and ready to go and get my files cleaned out.  I also need to clean out my storage closet and get rid of some things in it.  When I did a bed shuffle I piled things up in the closet and have never gotten rid of the extra stuff.  I don’t like not being able to find things so need to get that room sorted out.  Anyone need a twin bed set?

Found three eggs in the roosting area of the coop today.  I threw them out for the chickens to eat.  Not sure why three of them decided to lay their eggs while roosting.  I have seen an egg there before but this was the first for three at once.  I hate wasting eggs but that is a real dirty part of the coop and I didn’t want to use an egg that came from that part of the pop.  Chickens love to eat raw eggs so guess that will serve as their Christmas present.

Found my peaceful valley this evening.  It was a rocky morning but a nap gave me a new perspective.  Maybe my word for 2019 should have been sleep!  It sure seems to be a struggle for me to find good sleep consistently.  May go into music at Cottonwood Falls for a bit tonight.  I need to make myself get out and be around people more.  IF I go I will enjoy it – it is getting out the door that is hard for me.

Grateful for dear friends that call and lift my spirits, grateful for naps that revive my tired body, and grateful for empty space that recharges my soul.

Had a delightful Winter Solstice Celebration this afternoon.  Fixed and served a hamburger vegetable soup that was delicious.  I hadn’t used this recipe before but I will fix it again.  We each set our intentions for 2019.

My word for 2019 is Secure “we”.  My mentor had taught us how to do this but I don’t think I ever clicked it in correctly.  I have done lots of work on myself and now I need to turn to “we” and learn how to build myself a community.  It is hard to be of service to the world when I am not in the world.  It has been too easy for me to become a hermit and not people as much as I should.  2019 is the year for me to learn how to “we”.

The intentions I set are wrapped around “we”.  Relationships, being of service and building a community were the ones I choose for this year.  It will be fun to see where this all takes me.

Found out a person important to my son is critically ill and may not live.  It is a hard time of the year to lose someone.  I will send healing light and love to them and keep Jason wrapped in love and prayers.

Got a Christmas card from the dear friends I met walking the Camino.  They ask me to not leave them hanging about my Match guy.  So for Carolyn and Tom here is the latest scoop.  I have spent lots of time with him lately.  My retreat was time away with him.  We spent 16 days together touring Colorado, Utah, and New Mexico and ended at his home in Oklahoma.  It was a wonderful time getting to know each other.  We did a lot of hiking together, went to several museums, attended a Choral Concert, and put together two different zig saw puzzles.  It was one of the better vacations I have ever taken.

Not sure where this relationship is going.  We are both being cautious and taking our time to let it unfold in a very organic way.  He has family with him until after New Year’s Day so I won’t see him again until after the first of the year.  Where we go from there no one knows other than at this moment we both want to see the other again.  We live three hours apart so we have to coordinate schedules to make that happen.  He is going to be teaching two different six-week long courses starting the first of February that he has to prepare for.  I have guests periodically that I need to be here for.

He is fun for me to text with and chat on the phone with when we aren’t together.  He can read me better than anyone I have ever met before.  We laugh a lot and have fun together.  That seems to be enough for me right now.  I don’t need to know where this is going – teaches me to stay in the moment and enjoy life.

I am going into Emporia in a bit to babysit the grandkids for the evening.  It will be fun to spend some more time with them.  They were out Sunday but I will take all the time with them I can get.  They are both growing up so fast and am thinking the day they would prefer not to spend time with G is coming soon.

Thanks to lots of friends I have managed to get rid of the extra eggs I had.  Down to only one dozen left.  Thanks friends!  Glad to see them be used and not wasted.

It is a beautiful clear day on the prairie today although the wind is sure in a hurry.  It has been blowing around 30 MPH most of the afternoon with gusts higher than that. I went down to do the chicken chores and needed rocks in my pockets to keep from being blown over.  Glad I was carrying a five-gallon bucket of water to help weigh me down.  The trip back to the house was a bit of a challenge.

Sitting with a grateful heart this afternoon.  Not sure why I have been so blessed.  Life feels easy to me today.  So very grateful!

Grateful for dear friends to celebrate Winter Solstice with, grateful for my Match guy and the potential he brings to me, and grateful for all the many ways I am blessed.

 

Today is the second anniversary of the death of my son-in-law.  I think of him often and especially today.  I am struck today by how many people he touched and continues to touch.  My life was changed in many ways with his death – I like to think for the better.  I certainly have learned not to waste time and put things off.  No one is guaranteed tomorrow.  I went on four international trips with Nicole since Chris died – trips I would not have gone on.  The trip to Peru especially was life-changing for me.  Working to learn my life lessons and make positive changes happen as a result of what my family went through.  I hold Chris’s dads in my heart today as well as his extended family and friends.

I went to KC this morning.  Made a stop at Old Navy to get two more pair of pajamas and then met two dear friends for lunch.  Always good to catch up with friends.  After lunch I went to Sprout’s to get a few things and then Nicole met me at Costco.  It was good to see Nicole today.  After I left Costco I stopped at Hy-Vee and then came home.  Had to do chicken chores by flash light as it was dark by the time I got home.

I was surprised it rained in KC today.  I hadn’t seen rain in the forecast.  It was foggy and cloudy here today.  I’m glad I was in KC today as it wasn’t a good fudge making day.  The forecast shows that the wind will in a hurry tomorrow.  I won’t have time for a hike tomorrow so it is a good day for the wind to blow.

Found a whole ham at Hy-Vee.  I had looked in Emporia and could only find half of hams.  For some reason I think the whole hams taste better.  Don’t really need that much meat but I will figure something to make to use the leftovers up.  I like ham salad.

Tomorrow some friends are coming over at noon so we can celebrate Winter Solstice.  I am going to make some soup for lunch for them.  I love celebrating Solstice and Equinox.  When one aligns with Mother Nature good things happen.  I look back at where I was when I first started celebrating the Winter Solstice and marvel at my own growth.

Got the results of my Thyroid Antibody test results back.  My levels are back within normal limits.  There is absolutely no sign of cancer anymore.  I had been told it would take up to three years for that to happen so was a bit surprised after only fifteen months my levels are already at the normal level.  Feel like I got an early Christmas gift with those results.  I wonder how much the changes I have made in my diet impacted the results.  Trusting it helped.  Results like this provide the motivation I need to continue to resist eating foods that contain flour or sugar.

I had a UA done to make sure the UTI I had the end of October was gone.  The UA was on the high side of normal or slightly over the limits.  My Doctor decided not to treat me with another round of antibiotics.  Trusting he made the correct decision.  I will do my best to continue to drink lots of extra water to continue to flush my system out.  It was hard to drink enough when I was traveling.

I need to remember to go into Emporia tomorrow evening so I can babysit the grandkids.  Michelle and Tim have a work Christmas party to go to.

My heart is full of gratitude tonight for my dear friends and the way they support me.  It has been a day of remembrance of my son-in-law and honoring his memory.  He is so missed and loved.

Grateful for dear friends, grateful for the sweet memories I hold in my heart of my son-in-law, and grateful for blood tests that show my cancer is gone!

Finally got some good sleep last night.  Fell asleep a little after 7:30 and slept until 9:30 and then slept again from 12:30 to 5:30.  I feel much better today!  I was feeling a bit crummy yesterday.

Got two packages mailed this morning.  Dropped off my recycling stuff and cashed a check at the bank.  I was able to find what I needed at the Strong City Grocery store so I didn’t have to run into Emporia to get stuff to make soup for Thursday.  Got a big batch of Chex Mix made this morning.  Still need to make another batch of fudge and  do the chicken chores this afternoon and then I will have my to-do list completed for the day.  Feels good to have had a productive morning.

Lost another pound today – down to a new low for me.  I have now officially lost 50 pounds since February 11, 2018.  My BMI is still above 19.0 so still good.  I have been eating extra food but since I have more energy than I used to I have been walking a lot more and burning more calories.  My clothes all still fit and are not too loose so thinking the number on the scale really doesn’t mean much.  I don’t want to have to buy all new clothes again so really don’t want to lose much more.

It was a bright and beautiful start to the day on the prairie.  The sunrise was spectacular again.  The clouds have rolled in and rolled out and are rolling back in again.  No moisture is predicted so not sure why the clouds seems to want to hang around today.  At least most of the sky is bright blue right now.  Certainly can’t complain about temperatures in the 50’s for the middle of December.

The Solstice Ceremony needed to be changed to Thursday at noon.  Decided to fix some soup for lunch for the group.  If I remember to get some beer and self-rising flour while I am in KC tomorrow I will make beer bread to go with it.  I so enjoy gathering and celebrating Solstice with my dear friends.

I’m goIng to attempt to write some letters and get some Christmas cards ready to mail this afternoon.  Not going to do very many but I like to send some friends and family that aren’t on Facebook a card.  Cards seem a bit old-fashioned these days.  Sure don’t receive many any more.

Sitting in my peaceful valley again today.  I do have a tinge of restlessness in my background going on but thinking that is from the upcoming full moon that is happening Saturday night.  I’m glad I will be gone tomorrow with my trip to KC and then have my friends coming over Thursday noon.  I am going to babysit the kiddos Thursday evening so will be busy the next two days.  Friday things will slow back down for me.

Grateful for a good night’s sleep, grateful for a productive morning, and grateful to have found Bright Lines Eating Plan.

Went into Emporia this morning and made a good dent in my shopping list.  I stopped by the medical clinic and had my blood drawn for my quarterly thyroid test.  I also had a UA done to make sure my UTI has cleared up.  Went to the liquor store to get some Vodka so I can make some more vanilla.  Got the bourbon for our bourbon slush while I was there.  The lady that waited on me told me she didn’t drink either.  She was helpful and knowledgeable.  Went to Wal-Mart and got light bulbs, hangers, cookie containers, and groceries.

Stopped by and saw a friend I hadn’t seen for a long time.  It was good to see him.  I need to remember to drop in on my friends more often.  I didn’t stay long but it was nice to catch up with him.

Still need to get the two packages ready to mail.  I sat down to eat lunch when I got home and forgot I was going to do that today so will get the packages to the post office in the morning.  I want to make another batch of fudge and get the Chex Mix made yet this afternoon.  The batch of fudge I made yesterday turned out OK.  I could have cooked it for another three minutes but I prefer it to be a bit soft than too hard.  I didn’t taste it but it looks good.

Got one Christmas present today while I was out and about.  Still have lots to go though.  Wish I was a better gift buyer.  I don’t like “Stuff” and find it hard to buy stuff for other people.

Feeling a bit better today although my energy still seems a bit low to me.  Thinking my body is really tired and it is going to take a few days for it to fully recover from all my adventures.

I’m sitting in my favorite chair noticing how the sunlight coming in the west windows is casting light on all the dust that has gathered while I was gone.  Looks like cleaning house will be on my to-do list for tomorrow.  I finally got my kitchen cleaned up from all the baking I did yesterday.  I am going to go get it dirty again in a bit.  Good thing it cleans up fairly easily.

May go take a long walk when I get done writing this blog.  It is so nice outside I need to get out and enjoy it.  Thinking real winter weather will be here some day soon.

I have a very quiet mind this afternoon.  Hard for me to hold on to any thoughts long enough to get anything done.  After all the busyness of the last two months it feels good to have found my peaceful, quiet valley again.  I have nothing on my calendar for tomorrow other than mailing the two packages.  Empty space feels so good right now.  May call tomorrow a pajama day and do nothing but read and rest.  I haven’t treated by self to a day like that for a long time.

Grateful for the beautiful day, grateful my list is shorter than it was this morning, and grateful for my peaceful, quiet valley.  I have missed sitting in it!

Whew!  Survived this day.  Made a full table top full of sugar cookies.  They are iced and sprinkled.  I made the biggest mess in my kitchen today and it is almost cleaned up.  The floor has been scrubbed and vacuumed, the center island is clean, and the chairs have been desprinkled.  Still need to do a second load of dishes and clean out the sinks and then my kitchen will be back in order.  Always glad to get the sugar cookies made.  Ellexia vacuumed the sprinkles up for me – she likes to vacuum.

Made a pan of peanut butter bars this morning.  Still need to get a batch of fudge made but needed to wait until the grandkids went home to make that.  The kiddos just left so next on my list is my second attempt at fudge.  Trusting this batch will come out OK.

Tim brought the grandkids out this morning around 11:00.  They had spaghetti and meat balls for lunch.  Both snacked on Christmas cookies and peanut butter balls all afternoon.  Two cans of Pringles disappeared too.  It was fun having them here today.

Tagen carried up the tubs that had the Christmas trees in them and Ellexia carried up the boxes of ornaments.  I put the trees together and then they each took a tree to decorate.  I had to finish each of them as they both crapped out on me.  Both trees are up and almost finished.  Need to find the tree toppers and tree skirts and they will be done.  Glad that job is done.  I appreciated the help and motivation the kiddos provided me today to get the trees up.

I needed to fill the chicken water can today.  I thought I had it on right but when I picked it up I spilled three gallons of water all over.  It is a heated watering can and I sometimes have the hardest time putting it back together correctly.  Not sure what I do wrong.  Some days it goes on easy as can be – other days I fight with it.  At least it wasn’t freezing out today.

It was another beautiful day on the prairie with temperatures in the mid 50’s and no wind.  I wasted another good hiking day by staying inside baking cookies.  Maybe tomorrow I can get out and take a hike.  My body feels a bit swollen  and bloated today – thinking it is because I haven’t been out walking since Friday.

The fundraising dinner last night at Pioneer Bluffs went over well.  I had fun serving and visiting with the other volunteers.  I ate some of the food that was served – not sure it was all on plan as I felt a bit stuffed and bloated afterwards.  The couple that prepared all  the food sure worked hard to make it a nice evening for our guests.  The guests enjoyed at least four different wines or liquors with dinner.  They were all pretty happy and relaxed by the time they left.

I forgot to eat lunch until 3:00 this afternoon.  I fixed the kiddos their lunch and then started rolling sugar cookies.  It is going to take me a couple of days to get back on track with my eating plan.  My body is feeling sluggish and a bit icky so will be glad to get back on track.  It seems to be happiest when I eat my normal food.

Feels good to have gotten the sugar cookies made and the trees up.  I feel much more ready for Christmas now.  Still need to get some presents purchased, some cards sent out and a couple of packages mailed.  I still have almost two weeks before most of the packages need to be purchased so have lots of time left.

Have two empty space days ahead of me.  Should be able to finish the rest of my Christmas baking and get some packages ready to mail tomorrow.  Nice to have some empty space again.  Feels like it has been a long time since I had a nice stretch of empty space on my calendar.  I need to slow down and allow all of me to come together.  It has been a whirlwind of activity lately.  I need to get regrounded and find my center and prepare myself for Winter Solstice.  The light will start returning after Friday and the pace tends to pick up when that happens.

Grateful the sugar cookies are complete, grateful the grandkids came out today, and grateful the trees are up and decorated.  Let the Christmas season begin!

My Christmas cooking did not get off to a great start. I burned the first batch of fudge I attempted to make.  Still haven’t decided if I can save my favorite fudge making pan.  I remember years ago I ask my mother why she made fudge late at night.  She told me you can only make fudge and not do anything else and late evenings was the only time she could only do one thing.  I now understand what she was saying. I was making peanut butter balls and talking to Ellexia and Tagen on FaceTime when I burned the fudge.

I think the chocolate dipped peanut butter balls turned out OK.  They look good – I didn’t sample them.  I also dipped some Ritz crackers spread with peanut butter in chocolate to use up the rest of the dipping chocolate.  Made one pan of Peanut butter Rice Krispie treats.  Can you tell my family loves peanut butter?

The grandkids may come out tomorrow.  If they do I want to make sugar cookies while I have some helpers to frost them.  They said they would help me do so.

I will try another batch of fudge tomorrow.  I want to get some Christmas boxes mailed Monday and they need fudge in them if I can manage to get a good batch made.  Not sure why fudge always seems to give me trouble each year.

I am tired a bit today.  I slept hard for three hours last night but then had trouble sleeping the rest of the night.  Not feeling great this afternoon but thinking it is just because I am tired.  Trusting by tomorrow my energy level will start to rebound and I will be feeling better.  I have been trying to drink lots of water today as I feel a bit dehydrated.  It is hard to drink enough when one travels.

I need to shower and clean up and get ready to go to Pioneer Bluffs to help serve the fundraising dinner tonight.  After I finish blogging I will go down and gather eggs, give the dogs their HeartGuard and then take a shower.  I didn’t get out and take a walk today – too busy in the kitchen.  This is the first time I have sat down all day.

I did manage to get my suitcase unpacked and my laundry done today.  It always feels like it completes a trip when I put the suitcase away and have the laundry washed up and put away.  I’m sitting here looking at all the dust that came in my house while I was gone.  I had cleaned my whole house before I left but it sure got dusty while I was gone.

Feels good to have a start on my Christmas goodies.  Only have sugar cookies, peanut butter bars and several batches of fudge left on my list to make.  I will make New Year’s Cookies the day before our family gathering on the 29th so they are fresh for the kids to take home.  I won’t eat any this year.

Still need to put my Christmas tree up.  Maybe the grandkids can help me do that job tomorrow too.  I thought about not putting it up this year but I have some guests coming the 26th through the 31st and I feel like I need to have them up for them.  I’ll see how it goes tomorrow – may not happen.

I want to get a few Christmas cards and write some letters to put in them and get them out next week.  I used to send lots of cards but have really cut back on how many I send out now.  Most everyone I know is on Facebook and they can keep up with what I am doing.  I do have a few relatives and friends that aren’t on Facebook and I like to send them cards with a letter.

It is another beautiful day on the prairie.  56 degrees out in the middle of December!  I’ll take that anytime.  The wind is quiet today – it would have been a perfect day for a long walk.  Maybe tomorrow I’ll get away from the kitchen and get a walk in.

Got through the big pile of mail that came while I was gone.  Got a bill or two paid.  Filed the important stuff and added a big pile of papers to my recycling bins.  I think 90% of the mail I get is junk mail these days.

After Christmas I will get to start working on my income tax information.  I am anxious to see how the new tax laws will affect me this year.  Trusting I will not have to pay any income tax.  I haven’t really read the new changes so don’t have a clue.

Still sitting with all that happened on the retreat.  Feels a bit like I was in a different world for over two weeks.  I’m sure things will fall into place when the timing is right and I have had some time to process what happened.  Feeling like not all of me has returned home yet.

Grateful for this beautiful day, grateful that most of what I made today turned out OK, and grateful I was able to spend most of today at home in silence.  My soul needed that today!

 

I got home yesterday from my retreat.  It was so good to get away and so good to get home.  I had a wonderful time away.   It will take me some time to process all that happened while I was gone.  I’m glad I went and took a chance.  It may be an interesting year ahead of me!

My pet-sitter did a great job for me while I was gone.  I did get one phone call to let me know two of the three dogs had gone missing for a bit.  Both returned home later that day.  Not sure what happened – the electricity may have gone out or else the charge on their collars ran out.  Glad they returned safely.  I felt bad for my pet-sitter as she had looked for them for over an hour.  I was glad they returned for her peace of mind.

I hit the ten-month mark on Bright Line Eating Plan while I was gone.  I have lost 49 pounds in the ten months I have been eating on plan.  It was a challenge at times to stay on plan while traveling but I came home weighing what I did when I left.  I did do lots of walking while I was gone so that may have helped.  I have gone ten months now without eating any flour or sugar – at least to the best of my knowledge.  I don’t use artificial sugar or flours either.

I made an appointment with my orthopedic surgeon today so he can check out my bunions.  The one on my left foot is starting to cause my big toe to go numb and then it burns. I was able to walk through the pain but I am not sure how long I can do that.  I waited way too long to get the neuromas removed and I am not going to do that with the bunions.  I won’t see him until January 22.

I have 16 dozen eggs in my refrigerator!  The girls have decided to start laying again. Anyone need eggs?  I got a dozen eggs today when I went down this afternoon to the coop.  Glad to see they have quit being slackers.

I am sure enjoying the sunset tonight as I write this blog.  I missed seeing it while I was gone.  Today was absolutely beautiful with temperatures in the low 50’s.  I took a three-mile walk this afternoon.  The wind was a bit brisk when I walked north but in the lower valleys it was really nice.

It will be nice to get back into a “normal” routine again.  I don’t have much on my calendar for the rest of the month.  We aren’t having our family Christmas until December 29 so have two weeks of free time ahead of me.  I have been gone so much lately that I will really appreciate some down time.

I went into Emporia this morning and got the ingredients to start making my Christmas treats for the kids.  I need to give some serious thought to what I want to do for Christmas presents.  I haven’t taken the time to decide what I want to do yet.  Good thing I have two weeks to decide.

I need to get the treats made so I can ship a box to a couple of different people.  Hoping I will have enough made by Monday that I can get them out then so the people I am sending them to will get them by Christmas.  Still can’t wrap my head around the fact that Christmas is only 11 days away.  I haven’t caught the Christmas spirit yet.  Not my favorite time of the year.

Tomorrow night I am going to Pioneer Bluffs to help serve a fancy fundraising dinner.  I will be around some good friends so it will be a fun evening in service.

Sitting with a full heart tonight.  I really had the most amazing time on my retreat.  Feeling a bit like a let down might be in store for me over the next week or so.  The trip to Australia and New Zealand was so wonderful and then I followed it a week later with my retreat experience.  Time to slow things down and give myself some quiet time to process all that has happened.

Grateful for the beautiful sunset tonight that seemed to be saying Welcome home to me, grateful for the retreat experience, and grateful for the possibilities ahead of me for 2019.  Feels like it might be a year full of changes and adventures!

 

This will be my last blog for a couple of weeks.  I am preparing to leave on retreat and need to take a social media break as part of the retreat.  I will be checking text messages and email while I am gone as I have access to internet so if you want to get hold of me that is the best way to do so.  I will have my cell with me so you could call too.  I will accept calls as I am able to do so.  Leave a message if I don’t answer and I will call you back when I am free.

Walked my driveway this morning to check on the snow drift situation.  Luckily the propane truck made a propane delivery to me today and cut a track in the one big drift.  The drift is well over my knees deep.  After I shoveled for a bit I realized the drift is in a place that is easy to drive around and I really didn’t need to shovel it.  The sun is out this afternoon and the ice on the sidewalks is melting away already.  It will take some time before the deep drifts are gone though.

I went down and checked on the chickens and let them out into their yard to play.  They seemed to have survived the storm OK.  Had five eggs already this morning.  I’ll go down this afternoon and see if there are any more.

It was weird when the wind finally stopped blowing last night.  The house got very quiet.  I had trouble getting anything done yesterday as I was unsettled most of the day. I felt small and vulnerable during the storm.  Grateful when the wind slowed down and things calmed down a bit.  Last night was beautiful though as the almost full moon was shining brightly on the fresh snow and its’ light was being reflected.

Went to lunch today with a dear friend.  We had a lot to catch up on as I hadn’t spent time with her for a bit.  Always good to catch up with a friend.  The roads to town were nice and dry and clear.  Trusting my travel day on Wednesday will be as good.

I have started packing this afternoon.  Feel like I am taking too much stuff but won’t have easy access to laundry facilities while I am gone.  I have room to take stuff which may not be a good thing.  The outer wear takes up a lot of space.  It won’t all fit in my carry on bag this time.  Will have to take a second bag of some sort to fit it all in.  Add in some yarn, nuts, and miscellaneous stuff and I may need three bags.  I don’t like traveling that heavy.

Almost have my whole house cleaned.  I will finish up this afternoon and evening.  Always nice to come home to a clean house.

Excited to get this next adventure started.  Looking forward to the possibilities it may bring.

Grateful for surviving the blizzard yesterday with no damages, grateful for a dear friend that had lunch with me today, and grateful for the possibilities that this retreat may bring.