Today has been a blessed, uneventful day – the first one of this adventure. The others in the group were up in the cave until around noon so I had the whole place to myself in silence this morning. It did my soul good to have silence and no one around.
When they all got back we had lunch. They had quite an adventure last night and this morning. We had a strong storm come through overnight and they had to have some people come up with ropes to help them get out and on to the trail to come down. The trail was treacherous due to all the rain that happened overnight.
Both leaders told me today they were glad I had stayed behind as it was very hard hiking today. Makes me feel a bit better for having stayed behind.
This afternoon I had a 90 minute massage. She did a wonderful job and used just the right amount of pressure. Not too hard and not too soft.
We had a nice dinner tonight brought to us again. Afterwards we all opened up and shared our adventures and what our prayer is for ceremony Friday.
I realized by staying behind, I had taken care of myself and let that be more important than inconveniencing the two leaders that had to walk down with me and then walk back up again. A year ago I would have forced myself to go on and would have run into problems this morning trying to come down, if I had made it all the way up.
It feels like a confirmation to myself that I am, after 70 years, learning how to take care of myself and worrying less about what other people say and feel. I will always consider other people feelings and needs but there are times that I have to stand up for myself and put myself first.
Tomorrow is another chill day. We don’t have anything formal on the agenda. I think we are going to some river somewhere unless it is too full of water. We may go shopping a bit if the weather is bad and the river is too high. It only rained for about 30 minutes today which is almost like a day without rain here. Usually it rains 4 – 8 hours every afternoon and evening.
Friday we do ceremony again. This time in a space close to where I am staying so I will be able to go. Saturday is another massage and recovery day and then Sunday we return to San Jose and I fly home Monday.
So many lessons for me already this week. I’m so grateful I came and am having this experience.
Grateful for a quiet day alone, grateful for the four ladies I am sharing this journey with and grateful for a beautiful massage today.