Wednesday, February 8, 2023

It has been a very quiet day on the prairie.  The rain, if you can call it that, just started an hour or so ago.  It is more of a light drizzle than rain.  Have my fingers crossed that it will turn into real rain soon.  We so need moisture on the prairie.

I slept long and hard last night.  Starting to wonder if there is an accumulative effect of the sleeping aide.  I’m a bit concerned about my heart rate at night as the alarm on my smart watch goes off several times a night to alert me to the fact that my heart rate drops below 45 and stays there for 10 minutes.  Last night I got 10 such alerts.  The lowest was 40.  I’ll send a message to my doctor’s office tomorrow if I remember to do so and ask him for his recommendation.  I will be sad if he recommends I quit taking them.

For the first time in several weeks I have stayed on my eating plan today.  That feels like a win for the day.

Did some financial planning today.  Once a year or so I look at my spending and see if I am making the right choices.  I have the big trip coming up in September and needed to make sure it wouldn’t throw me off plan.  I will get a big tax refund this year that will offset much of the trip.  That is a good thing!  Money is still a trigger for me and can cause me to doubt myself.  It was good to review my spending for last year and know that from a pure factual perspective I am doing OK.  My fears can cloud the truth sometimes.

It is funny how my triggers seem to find a way to raise their ugly heads at times when I least expect them.  It has helped that over the years of my internal healing I have learned most of them and can recognize them for what they are.  I also know that your triggers never really go away, they present again and again on a higher level on the spiral of life.

Grateful for the moisture that is falling on the prairie today, grateful for the life lessons I have learned on my healing journey, and grateful I stayed on my eating plan today.