Todays lesson taught me more about completing Advanced Directives and naming a Medical Power of Attorney. A couple things I learned that surprised me I thought I would share.
Advanced Directives are not legally binding. A Doctor can choose not to follow them. That usually happens when there is one or more family members that disagree with the directives. The legal system backs the Doctor’s right to refuse to honor them. That is why it is so important to have a family meeting before a family member is in crisis and get everyone on board with your wishes.
There is a work around available but you have to know to ask for it. It is called a POLST which stands for Physician Order of Life Sustaining Treatment. In KS and MO it is called a TPOPP which stands for Transportable Physician Orders for Patient Preferences. Unfortunately these orders can only be issued when a patient has a terminal diagnosis. They can be written when a person is frail and old, however. But usually they are forms that can not be done years ahead of time.
When I work with my clients I will give them a copy of the TROPP and they can complete part of it and take it to the hospital or doctor if and when it might be appropriate to do so. It is hard to ask for something that you don’t know exists – right?
I also learned that your Advanced Directives, or at least your DNR orders should be hanging on your refrigerator. That is where EMS professionals will look to see if you have them. It might be wise to keep a copy in your car, your purse, and a copy with a few of your loved ones. Without them present they won’t do any good. You can also give a copy to your doctor to scan into your medical records. That presents a good moment for you to have a discussion with your primary doctor about your wishes if and when that time should come.
Advanced Directives can be cancelled if you change your mind. If you get divorced and you had named your ex as your Health Care Proxy they are automatically cancelled upon divorce.
Think carefully about who you choose to carry out your wishes. If your partner is struggling to accept your choices maybe it would be best to choose someone else. They don’t have to be related to you. It makes things easier if they are geographically close to where you live so they can be present at the hospital. Who you designate may change throughout your life. Relationships change and people move on. Maybe set a reminder on your birthday each year to review your records and see if the person(s) you choose still works for you. It is also a good idea to name two people in case someone isn’t available.
The instructor also talked about the need for people of all ages to do Advanced Directives and a end of life care plan. Accidents and medical trauma happen and it is a real gift to the family if they know what your final wishes are. My family learned that a few years ago. Making all those tough decisions when you are under an incredible amount of shock, grief and stress adds to a hard situation. Knowing what they would have wanted and being able to honor that makes things easier for loved ones left behind.
Advanced Directives and end of life care plans can be changed as your life changes. The choices I make as a 68-year-old are probably different than the ones I would have made as a 30-year-old.
Another choice you can make is to designate a conservator. They will be the one that has the duty to carry out your wishes as to what will happen to your body when you die. This can be the same personas your healthcare Proxy or Healthcare Power of Attorney or you can designate a different person. Again you predetermine what you want to happen and this person will then carry out those wishes.
Another point that was made was to remind us that the Power of Attorney that was designated in your will to handle your material and financial matters is not automatically your Medical Power of Attorney or Healthcare Proxy. You may name the same person to do all these tasks or you may have different ones doing different things. You need different paper work to name the different roles people will be playing for you. Man! This gets confusing and challenging to navigate through.
I ordered a stack of TPOPP forms today as well as new business cards. I am going to call my practice My Hand in Yours. I have my notary stamp papers in process and should be good to go as a notary soon. All these little bits and pieces that need to be done so I can be in service to others.
I had three people reach out to me and volunteer to have me help them create their end of live care plans and directives. I so appreciate their willingness to be a guinea pig for me to practice on. I could use at least two others so if you are interested in getting your wishes on paper let me know. I won’t be ready to do the sessions for probably another month but we shall see how quickly I move through my training and when my supplies come in.
Doing this work has helped remind me to be grateful for my healthy body and to live each day fully as we never know when our time will be up. There are no guarantees of another day but there is a guarantee that one day we will each die.