Had trouble finding sleep again last night. Finally feel asleep around 4:30 this morning. Dang! This is getting old and exhausting.
I went out last night and started painting the new shed. Got it about 1/3 done last night. Went out this morning and painted some more. It is about 3/4 done now. Went out this afternoon and did some ladder work on it but it was too hot to stay out for long. I will try to get out in the morning and finish it up. Shouldn’t take more than an hour.
I took a nap this afternoon. I feel hungover and cranky this afternoon. My mind went down a rabbit hole and I am having trouble pulling myself out of it. I have a situation with someone and I don’t know what to do about it. They have crossed my boundaries once too often and I need to give myself a time-out from them for a bit. The timing sucks but it is what it is. Sometimes I have to step up and take care of myself first.
I think the unsettled feelings I am having is because this feels new and weird to me to set my boundaries. I am in that in-between stage where I have no idea of how this is going to go. All I can do is take care of myself and keep telling myself their reaction is their issue and I am not responsible for it. Man! This is hard sometimes.
My neighbor is cutting down a big row of bushes between his property line and mine. We decided last night that a short privacy fence would look better. The bushes are overgrown and not very pretty. He has them about half way done. Since this is on the property line, he is doing the labor and I will pay for materials.
I have a big burn pile in my backyard from limbs that had fallen during storms over the last year or so. He is adding the brush to it and then will supervise burning it. Since the pile is so big, he has to notify the authorities and get their permission to burn it. He did that when I first bought this property. Sure will save him a lot of time and energy not to have to haul the bushes off in his pickup.
I don’t like the look of the big pile of limbs, etc in the yard but will tolerate it for a bit. Hoping it doesn’t get too dry too fast and we won’t be able to burn it quickly. Not sure I want that pile in my yard all summer.
Nothing on the calendar for tomorrow. It has been nice to get to stay home all day today and do whatever I want to do, even if that is nothing. It did feel good to get out and paint and do some physical labor. I have all this angst and needed to work some of it out. It will be good to get something crossed off my to-do list this weekend.
It feels weird to have lots of empty space again. It has been a long time since that has opened for me. Not sure what to do with it. I find myself procrastinating on doing things on my to-do list as I am not sure what I will do when that list is empty. Guess I should work my way through it and see what happens. When I anticipate things, I make them into something they are not in reality.
I sure don’t like this heat. It reached over 90 today. I do not do well in hot weather. I’m afraid we are in for another hot, hot summer in KS this year. I’m grateful I put in central air so the house will be comfortable. I didn’t turn it on today as I am managing with the use of the ceiling fans and tower fan. this house doesn’t have solar so I have to pay for A/C. It is still cooling down nicely at night so I will tough out a couple hours during the day for a bit longer.
I need to get hold of my high school student that does work for me occasionally. I had asked him a week ago to do something for me and he promised he would do it one day last week and that didn’t happen. I may have to find someone else to do a couple of jobs for me. Not sure who I can find but will start looking if necessary. Tagen is taking four collage classes this summer and working full-time so he doesn’t have any free time to help.
Life can be easy on some days and hard on others. This is one of the hard ones. I’m grateful to know that hard days don’t last forever and soon I will have more easy ones. Sure don’t like the hard ones but if I didn’t know the hard ones, how would I know the ones that are easy? My mentor used to tell me the farther I can go in both directions, the more joy I can find in life.
Grateful the shed is almost done being painted, grateful for afternoon naps, and grateful that this too shall pass.