This has been a beautiful day on the prairie. The temperature reached higher than forecast and the sun has been out to play most of the day. The clouds are starting to roll in this afternoon and we have a chance of rain later today. It was so nice to have a sunny day.
I went in to Emporia and volunteered at the Friends of the Library Book Sale today. I only had to work two hours so it went fast. We were nice and steady busy most of the time. I got to do the cash table so got to sit most of the time. It was fun to watch families come in and the little children picking out books. Most of the adult books were only $2 or $3 each – what a bargain. Monday and Tuesday you can get a whole bag of books for $10. Wednesday a bag is only $5. I need to go back to town Tuesday so will get a bag or two then.
I finally got a good night’s sleep last night. I didn’t wake up much during the night which was wonderful. If felt good to get lots of sleep. I am tired this afternoon but thinking that is because I have been out of the house so much the last four days. I get to stay home all day tomorrow and Monday so will have time to recharge and refill.
I don’t have much on my to-do list right now so have lots of empty space time. When I come home from my Vegas trip I’ll get to start painting the deck as the weather should turn nice by then. I hope to get it all painted before the heat of the summer hits. It will be good to have a big project to do. It has been a bit since I have had a project to work on.
I noticed at the book sale today I was having trouble with my short term memory. Not sure if I wasn’t paying attention enough or what but I would tell a customer how much they owed and by the time I received their money and went to make change I forgot how much they owed. Felt a bit slow on the mark today. I don’t think I cheated anyone or the friends of the library group any money. I am a visual person and I didn’t see the amount written down of the total owed so it didn’t stick in my brain. Hopefully it isn’t a sign of something else going on. I haven’t used my brain much lately to do math so maybe it is a bit rusty.
I need to do a bit of housecleaning tomorrow. I haven’t done much cleaning lately and it is starting to show dirt. I don’t have plans to have anyone over so it is hard to find the motivation to clean. Maybe I need to invite some people over so I have a reason to clean.
I cleaned up my facebook group list. I had joined a couple of support groups earlier this year but was not finding them helpful so I left them. Reading the stories of other people being in the situation I had been seem to trigger me and not in a good way. I am grateful I was able to get out of my situation rather quickly. So many choose not to for whatever reason. I tried to help a few out by commenting what had worked for me. But reading others stories caused me to have flashbacks and then I would start ruminating and I didn’t want to do that. The group had helped for a bit but it is time for me to move on.
As I learn more and more about setting boundaries I am learning what works for me and what doesn’t. I am doing some editing of my life and discarding the things that I carried so I could help others. I am opening up some space for new things to come in and in order to do that I need to discard things that no longer serve me well. Time for me to reorganize my priorities in life. My new mantra is “Honor Self and Honor Others”. If what I do doesn’t honor myself, then I can’t continue doing it. I can only honor others if I honor myself first.
I feel like I am getting to know myself in a new way. Life is getting easier and freer for me as I realize how I have allowed others to “use” me and I have violated others boundaries by imposing myself on them. I will continue to learn more about myself and how best to interact with others. I’m sure I will make mistakes in this new journey for me but that is part of life too. Sometimes I learn best by screwing up and trying again.
Grateful for the friends of the library book sale, grateful for empty space, and grateful for learning about boundaries.