Starry night on the prairie

I am home from the hospital. I took a four hour nap and not sure how long I will stay up. Going well as far as pain control. Slow going for a bit but that is to be expected. I am grounded for one week and then I can gradually increase movement and activity. It should take about six weeks until I can lift, bend and go back to normal life.

I was most impressed with St. Luke’s Hospital on the Plaza. The first day the care was outstanding. Everyone that worked in the operating room came and introduced themselves to me prior to surgery. I have never had that happen before. The pre-op area was efficient and comforting.

Surgery lasted about two hours. They had to do intensive repair but didn’t have to put in a sling which is a relief to me. No complications reported to me during surgery.

I was in recovery for about two hours. I don’t remember too much of it other than every time I opened my eyes someone was looking over me.

The nursing care on the floor was excellent. For the most part they answered the call light promptly and took their time and didn’t rush me. The first day and night team were the best. The second day they felt a step off but it still was good service.

I had to pee twice today and then they scanned my bladder for retention. I didn’t have much either time. I even went a third time before I left. If I didn’t pass their test, I would have had to come home with a Catheter. Grateful that didn’t happen.

I took three walks around the unit today. They had me use a walker which was a good thing, especially the first lap around. I got stronger each time and went further each time.

Jason took me up to the hotel I stayed in Wednesday night. It was an old hotel that needs remodeling but the bed was clean and the room quiet so it met my needs. I walked the two blocks to the hospital check-in area Thursday morning.

Nicole came up and was there before I went back for surgery Thursday morning. She stayed with me all day Thursday and went home late afternoon. Nicole came back up mid Thursday morning and then Michelle came up around 3:00 to drive me home. I was ready to go home and was able to meet Michelle at the dismissal area of the hospital so she didn’t have to park and come in. We stopped at CVS in Emporia to pick up the new prescriptions and came home. It didn’t take me long to go to bed. I slept really good for about four hours.

I haven’t eaten much yet. The only real pain I have had is a gas bubble around my wind pipe. When I would eat or drink it would cause pain and I felt like I couldn’t catch my breath. They finally gave me a shot of something which helped it. It has come back but not near as badly. Hoping I can find something to eat soon. I tried a bite of yogurt and a bit of a banana but both made me dry heave. I will try something else later. I have been able to get some fluids down and will work on taking in more.

My follow up appointment is in three weeks. It was supposed to be two weeks but that was their first available. If I have any complications I will call their office before that. Not anticipating any so don’t think an extra couple of days will hurt.

I had an intern come in this morning and we talked about the drugs they were going to give me upon discharge. I asked her for a substitution for Oxycoden and she said she could do something else. When I got the list of drugs upon check-out she hadn’t given me something else. I made the nurse call the doctor and he wouldn’t substitute anything. I don’t think I will need something that strong anyways so will just use Tylenol and Ibuprofen and the muscle relaxer. Oxycoden wires me and I won’t sleep for several days if I take one. Not going there!

There was also some confusion about when I can drive again. The instructions said two weeks OR 24 hours after taking the last pain meds. The check-out nurse said two weeks. I had her check and the doctor said one week if I don’t take the strong pain meds. The doctor had told me when he came in the room today that I was grounded for one week and then could gradually increase activity.

I could feel the love and support from all my friends and family. It sure helps a person get through these things when that happens. Looking forward to a smooth recovery and lots of quiet time. I foresee lots of naps in the week to come and lots of walks around the house.

Grateful for the excellent care I received from St. Luke’s, grateful for the time and care I received from my kids, and grateful I am home to rest and heal.

I am settled into a hotel right across the street from the hospital. We drove past the entrance I need to go to in the morning and it is only a short walk from the hotel. I won’t need to call a taxi in the morning to get to where I need to go.

I finished the three tax tests for AARP I needed to complete this morning. Had some password issues but was able to stick with it and get it done. I passed all three tests.

I have a policy acknowledgement form that I had to sign and then somehow forward it to my site leader. Not sure I did that correctly. Guess she can help me with that later if needed. I wished they would provide instructions for how to do these things.

Met a dear friend for lunch. Just what my soul needed today. We had a deep conversation which I always appreciate. It would be very hard to do life right now without friends that you can lay down your mask and be real with.

Kathy’s key fob for her car needed the battery changed. I looked up instructions and couldn’t figure out how to do it. Then I remembered to try to find a video that showed me how to do it. I found a really good video and was able to change the battery. I get ridiculously proud of myself when I do things like this. I needed a win today and that was mine for the day!

Jason picked me up around 4:00. Traffic was heavy but we didn’t hit any stop and glide spots. I appreciated him making the trip to bring me up here tonight. Hoping I will be able to find some sleep tonight.

My tummy had issues again today. It picked a good day for it as I was only to eat or rather drink clear liquids today. Anytime I drank something my tummy would act up. I haven’t been hungry so that was a plus today. Hoping it will settle down and not act up tomorrow. I won’t be able to get to the bathroom quickly after surgery. My tummy acted up Sunday too and was fine Monday and Tuesday. Not sure what it is trying to tell me.

I stopped by the Detention Center and dropped off a check to pay for the ice cream treats Love in Action is gifting the detainees on Valentine’s Day. The lady that took the check didn’t know anything about it. I forwarded the email I had received from the Center so she knew what was going on. She wasn’t overly friendly but I think we took care of business. I have to trust the treats will happen.

I have to be across the street and at admissions at 6:15 in the morning. I will leave the hotel at 6:00 which should give me time to find where I am going. They had told me the hospital would call me today to confirm the time I am to be there but I didn’t get a call. No news must mean everything is still on schedule.

Nicole is coming up in the morning to wait while I am in surgery and to spend the rest of the day with me. Michelle is coming up Friday to get me and take me home. What would I do without my kids?

Not feeling to anxious yet. They really didn’t tell me much about what to expect afterwards. That was probably a good thing. Hard to worry when you don’t know what to worry about.

A person I follow on Facebook posted a video today that confirms what I had been feeling about how to handle what is happening in the world these days. He recommends setting aside some time to allow yourself to feel your hard feelings about what is going on. We collectively had a lot of anger and grief about what is happening and we have to feel it to allow it to be released from our bodies. He recommends doing it regularly and releasing bits at a time. Doing this allows for your central nervous system to come back into regulation. Once you are regulated you can hear your intuition tell you what steps you can take using your own personal gifts. Staying steady allows you to become a resource for others that may be more personally impacted. We all have to find that balancing point between denial and anger and fear. The action we will each take will look differently person to person.

The other thing he recommended was setting limits on your consumption of media intake. You have to gift yourself grace and step aside at times. Do whatever it takes so you can stay steady.

Somedays it doesn’t feel like I am doing enough when I do this but I also know that burning myself out will not allow me to stay steady.

Grateful to be tucked into a quiet hotel for the night, grateful Jason drove me up tonight, and grateful for lunch with a friend today.

Last night after I posted my blog, I got a text from a dear friend saying she would be happy to pick up groceries for me if I wanted to make an on-line order at Walmart. She was going to be in Emporia today and would be happy to stop and pick them up.

How sweet was that? I quickly fill out an order and then this morning when I got the notification that the order was ready to be picked up, I sent her a copy of the text. She delivered them to me around noon. Bless her heart. I had ordered three cases of bottled water and two big bags of dog food plus food stuff. Nothing like getting groceries delivered to my front door.

I so appreciated the delivery. That saved me from making a trip to Emporia this morning and now I am stocked and ready for recovery time.

I took a chair nap this afternoon as I didn’t sleep well again last night. Felt good to get a bit more sleep. I am tired tonight so hoping I can get a good night’s sleep tonight. We shall see.

I tripped over a strap that is on a box under my desk this afternoon. I landed on my knee. Both my knee and the foot that got caught in the strap are sore tonight. Not what I needed before surgery. Hoping by tomorrow they will be less cranky.

Kathy and I went to a birthday party this afternoon. Before we left another friend sent me a text and told me she would bring Kathy home afterwards as I had to go to Emporia afterwards. I am the luckiest girl to have two good friends that met my needs today and I didn’t even have to ask! Thanks so much to both of them!

The birthday party was wonderful. It is a delight to gather with six other like-minded women and share our joys and concern. I was sorry I had to leave before it was over.

I went to tax class again. Several of us had trouble logging on again. I am getting an error message that is preventing me from getting to a page I need to get to so I can take two tests. I found a troubleshooting guide so when I have a minute I will see if I can fix the problem.

We went over the test that we need to pass. I had worked the additional problems and checked my answers with the instructors. I would have passed this year! I will answer the test questions on the computer tomorrow. The class is meeting again Thursday night to go over the problems that I worked ahead of time. We are also going to meet next week two times. Not sure if I will make it to those classes or not. I will see how recovery is going. I can’t drive unless I have been off the pain medication for at least 24 hours. Have no idea how I will be doing. I told the instructor I would let her know the first of the week. I have to complete the three additional tests and then I will be certified. The rest is just practice problems and I don’t have to do them.

Tomorrow I have a couple of errands to run. I am hoping the money I transferred from the Venmo account to the Love in Action account went through so I can go to the Detention Center and pay for the Valentine’s ice cream treats. I could write a personal check but the books would be cleaner if I can wait and write a business check. I am hoping I can talk to the Captain when I go to the Center.

I am meeting a friend for lunch tomorrow which will be fun. I always enjoy deep conversations with a friend.

I will need to pack for the overnight at the hotel tomorrow night and then the overnight at the hospital Thursday night. Jason is coming around 5:00 tomorrow afternoon to drive me to KC. I have to be at the hospital Thursday morning at 6:15. Nicole is going to meet me there. Hoping I will get home sometime Friday. Michelle is going to come get me Friday and bring me home.

I am to take a blood pressure pill at 8:00 in the morning so will have to set my alarm to make sure I am up at that time. Not sure why they were so particular about that instruction but the nurse repeated it twice.

So far I don’t feel too anxious about the surgery. I have no idea what to expect for afterwards and maybe that is a good thing. It wouldn’t help anything to worry about it so I will take it as it comes. The plan is for me to spend one night at the hospital and then home on Friday.

Still sitting with the question as to how I can stay in a high vibration and in love and still be in resistance. Struggling to find an easy answer to that question. Guess I will keep on doing what I have been doing for a bit until something else comes to me. Sometimes if I lay a problem down I can find an answer easier.

Grateful for my friends that help me out before I know I need the help, grateful for the gathering today, and grateful I am almost certified to do taxes this year.

I took my car to Dieker’s at 10:00 this morning for an oil change. I dropped it off and then walked down to the post office to get some stamps for the Detention Center. Went to the bank to deposit a check and get some cash for Kathy. Walked home and then walked back to Dieker’s about an hour later to pick up my car. I had forgotten to ask them to rotate the tires but they noticed they needed done and took care of them. I love their service. I stopped at the Detention Center to drop off the stamps and then came home.

I got the two tests done that I needed to do before tax prep class this evening. Went to tax class at 5:30. The first class is always chaos as we all try to get on our computers and figure out passwords. There are five different sites we have to access and all five have different user names and passwords. I think it is a test of survival. If you can make it through training, the tax season is a breeze.

I have to go back to another class tomorrow night. They are also meeting Thursday night but I will miss that one. The leader expects that we will need a couple more classes next week. Not sure if I will make those classes or not. It will depend on how well I do after surgery. I am not going to push myself too hard to make it to the classes. Most of what we cover we don’t use anyways.

I have a happy hour to go to tomorrow afternoon at 3:00. I will have to leave a little before 5:00 so I can make it to class on time. I have six problems I need to do before class tomorrow and take two other tests. Luckily none of them will take too much time.

Sometime in the next week I will need to do the rest of the problems of the test. I told the leader I would check my answers with her before I attempt the test so I can pass. Two years ago I did it all on my own and failed. Not going there again!

I still haven’t gotten the groceries I need so will have to figure out if I want to stop after class tomorrow night or make two trips to town and get them tomorrow morning. It will depend on what time I get up tomorrow and what mood I am in. I might put off the trip to Emporia until Wednesday morning.

I don’t think I have too much else I need to get done before Thursday. We worked out today that Jason is taking me up Wednesday night, Nicole is spending the day with me Thursday and then Michelle is coming up Friday and will bring me home. I appreciate all the kids helping their mom out.

Have no idea what to expect post surgery. I am on limitations on lifting for six weeks. Other than that I don’t know what the instructions will be. It will probably depend on what all they have to do. The surgery will take between two and four hours depending on what they find. Hoping it is closer to the two hours than the four. They are doing it using a robot so I won’t have a big incision which should facilitate a quicker recovery.

I read a post on Facebook today where a US citizens in Minneapolis was taken into custody for eight hours. He shared what his experience was like. Scary stuff! Where is all this going and when will it end?

Ready for surgery already. I was diagnosed in June so it has been a long time coming. Trusting this will solve several problems I am having and won’t create new ones.

Sitting with a quiet mind tonight. I didn’t spend too much time reading the news today and that helps keep my mind quiet. I have finally learned I can only take in so much before it affects my inner peace.

Grateful the first class of tax season is over, grateful for my kids help this week, and grateful I get to see my friends tomorrow.

I went to Emporia this afternoon to pick up a book I need for tax class tomorrow. I have to take two tests before class. We take the same test every year so hoping I remember the answers. We will go over them in class before we enter the answers on the computer so we can all pass.

While I was in town I dropped off a hyacinth to a friend that I felt needed a sign of hope and promise. For us sensitive types this has been a rough week, month, year and on it goes. We have to hold on to each other and minister to each other the best we can.

Have had some tummy issues today. It has gotten worse as the day goes on. Finally took some Imodium and hope that things slow down a bit. I will take some more in a bit if things don’t slow down. Haven’t had an episode like this for a long time.

Haven’t gotten much done today. I will work on the tests in a bit and get them out of the way. I want to read over the other tests we have to take and see if they are the same ones we have had in the past or if they changed them up this year. I should save them from year-to-year. It would sure make it easier. I love doing taxes but hate the work we have to do to get certified to do them.

Tomorrow I have to take my car to Dieker’s for an oil change at 10:00. If it is nice, I will walk down to the post office and get some stamps for the Detention Center and then take them up to the Center while they are working on my car. I need to talk to the Captain if he is free. I will pay for the ice cream we are providing the Detainees for Valentine’s Day while I am there.

I have a tax prep meeting to go to at 5:30 in Emporia. If my tummy is better, I will go in early and have dinner. I may be on toast and applesauce tomorrow. We shall see how the evening goes.

Tuesday I have a happy hour to go to and Wednesday I am meeting a dear friend for lunch. Wednesday evening Jason is taking me to KC. I will spend the night at a hotel near the hospital as I have to be at the hospital Thursday morning at 6:15.

Hoping I can get the PayPal charity account open and going before surgery. If not, Nicole said she would help me with it when she brings me home Friday. Sometimes these things are not as easy as they should be.

Have to stop and get a few more groceries one day this week. I need a couple more things in the house before I leave Wednesday night. I won’t be able to pick up cases of water for a bit. I also need to get a big bag of ice and put it in smaller containers so I have it available.

I read a meme today that said “The most dangerous form of blindness is believing that your perspective is the only reality”. That one hit me between the eyes as I have recognized I do that. I am better at it now than I used to be but it still grabs me and shakes me sometimes. We are all on different timelines which creates different realities all playing out at the same time.

I can’t change anyone else’s reality or timeline. I do need to stay focused on where I am and doing what I need to do to stay in as high of vibration that I can. Dang, life is hard sometimes. How do I resist and still stay in a high vibration? I think many of us are asking ourselves that these days.

I will continue to put my energy in Love in Action and do a little bit of good for a few. I will also continue to focus on my own vibrational level and keeping it as high as I can. There isn’t a damn thing I can do about the other stuff. I will allow myself to feel the hard feelings and do my best not to transfer them to others.

Grateful for those that share my reality, grateful my tummy will be better by tomorrow, and grateful for Dieker’s who take good care of my car.

I was sitting in my chair watching a show when my phone rang last night around 8:30. It was a friend that informed me a Detainee at the Chase County Detention Center had been released earlier Friday and was sitting in the lobby of the Grand Hotel. It was getting close to closing time at the Grand and they needed help with the Detainee so the staff could go home.

I drove up to the Grand Hotel and made contact with the Detainee. He didn’t speak any English so I used a translator service on my iPhone. Luckily he had a ride coming to get him that would be there shortly. The Detainee called a bilingual friend and she filled me in on what was going on. Sure enough, within five minutes his ride showed up and the Detainee was on his way.

Not sure what the Detainee story was or how long he had been at the Grand. I have been told he came in the Grand wearing a t-Shirt and shorts and had sandals on. It was snowing out when I went up to check on him. The Grand Hotel had found some warmer clothes for him somehow.

I will check with the Captain of the Detention Center Monday to find out the back story. I am full of gratitude to the owner and staff at the Grand Hotel for caring for this Detainee until his ride showed up.

We have got to come up with a solution for this problem. It is creating a community issue. Not sure if the Detainee was offered a place to stay at the Detention Center or if he had to leave. I will get some facts Monday.

I think I need to put together an advisory panel of some sort and include a City and or County representative, someone from the Detention Center, clergy in the community and a couple of other interested parties to come up with a solution to this issue. It is bigger than I can handle alone with Love In Action. I am told this only happens once or twice a month but not sure that is true.

Today has been a quiet day at home. I did drive up to the Dollar General store and got some night lights so I could light up Kathy’s new bathroom. I got a package of three so will see tonight when it is dark if the light in the bathroom is enough or if I need to put one in the storage room too.

Am working on printing my blog. I had to start printing from May 1, 2025 and print the rest of 2025. My printer only allows me to request printing for about six or eight items. If I give it more than that to process, it stalls out or prints gibberish. It did that once today. It takes me a bit to get them all printed and then I have to three-hole punch them to put them in the binders.

Worked on my personal income taxes for a short while. I rented all three properties to family and it makes it a bit of a challenge to find all I need. I didn’t have a property manager keeping records for me. I also sold all three properties so have extra paperwork to find for all of that. Not my favorite thing to do.

I may try to go to Emporia tomorrow and pick up my AARP tax computer. I reread the text about the meeting Monday night I have to go to and in the text she requested we pick up our computers and do two tests prior to the meeting. Best get that done!

I delivered two of the blooming hyacinths to neighbors today. I had seven of them blooming with six more coming later. Both neighbors seemed pleased to get one. I’m afraid I have not taken the chance to get to know either one of the neighbors well.

I am beginning to think I may be allergic to the hyacinths. I love the smell of them but have been very snotty ever since they started blooming. Dang it anyways.

Tomorrow I will go to Emporia and pick up my AARP computer and a few groceries. Hopefully after I get home I can do the two tests that I need to have done prior to the meeting Monday night. Monday I take my car in to have the oil changed. I also need to go to the post office and purchase some stamps and take them up to the Center. While I am there I will talk to the Captain about the Detainee that was released Friday and also pay for the ice cream treats Love in Action is providing the Detainees for Valentine’s Day.

I made the mistake of reading some comments about a post covering the rally in Emporia today. I know better! I should not be surprised at some of the responses but it still disappoints me when I read what someone I know posts. I guess we all see what we see and believe. I refuse to argue with those that see things differently than I do as I don’t think that I can change anyone’s mind. Yet, not responding feels like agreement.

I will continue to do what I do and focus my energy on Love in Action. I also send regular emails to my elected representatives. Sure doesn’t feel like enough but I also know I don’t have the power to change what is happening. My heart hurts watching the fighting and divide and murder that is happening. What will it take for all of us to realize we are in this together?

Grateful the Detainee found a way home last night, grateful for the care and concern he was provided by the Grand, and grateful for neighbors that accepted a gift of a hyacinth.

It has been a quiet, stay-at-home day. I got lots of sleep last night at last. As usual, when I get lots of sleep I am sleepy all day. Not sure why it works that way.

Got the bathroom cleaned today. Found lots of dirt. I have some empty space in the bathroom since Kathy moved her things out of it. I love having empty space as it allows new things to come in.

Did three loads of laundry. I have most of them folded and put away. Waiting on the last load to finish drying.

Got one step closer to opening a PayPal account. Waiting on two deposits to come in so I can report the amount. I still don’t think it will work but we shall see. I need to scan my picture and am struggling to look straight ahead for the camera on my iPad. I can’t seem to see what I am doing and look a different direction so it appears that I am looking straight forward. I may have Kathy try to help me tomorrow.

I did manage to get on-line for the new checking account and ordered checks. I wish this bank would accept deposits via my iPhone. I have to take the checks to the bank. It is close but some days I struggle to get out and go.

I called and made an appointment to get the oil changed in my car next Monday. I was proud of myself for remembering as I hadn’t written it down. Although Nicole called today and she reminded me! Almost the same as writing it down I guess.

I may go to Emporia tomorrow. We need a nightlight for the new bathroom. I need to stop and pick up my AARP computer so I can get started on the tests and homework. I am running out of time to get it all done before surgery.

Western Kansas got snow today. It came close but hasn’t gotten here. It is to rain or even possibly snow later tonight. It is getting close to the middle of January and we haven’t had much winter yet.

The Detention Center asked for some more games and playing cards. I added a few things to the Amazon wish list. I think I will reserve the cash on hand for stamps and special events for the Detainees. People getting things off the Amazon wish list has slowed down. I did have a couple things purchased off of it this week and a couple cash donations. Still not sure if the interest in this project will continue or not. We shall see.

No plans for the weekend. I need to work on taxes both personally and for AARP. Hoping I can get the charity PayPal thing solved and able to receive donations. I have a tax prep meeting Monday night. It will probably be the only one I get to this year. I’ll have to figure things out myself and then check my answers with the Director of the program.

Monday I need to go buy some stamps and take them to the Detention Center and also pay for the ice cream treats for Valentine’s Day. They have to order them from their food supplier themselves. I need to make sure that is taken care of before surgery Thursday.

My head is quiet tonight. One of those times where I am struggling to hold on to a thought long enough to act on it. I enjoy the quiet inside when that happens although it is hard to get much done.

Grateful we have missed the snow so far, grateful the bathroom is clean, and grateful I got to stay home today.

I did not sleep at all last night. I took way too long of a nap yesterday. I did take an hour nap around noon today. Hoping I will sleep long and hard tonight and get back on track.

Kathy didn’t sleep much either. She was prescribed some prednisone for her cough and congestion and that can rob a person of sleep.

The sun has been flaring a lot lately and that can make sleep hard to find too. The odds feel a bit stacked against me getting sleep these days!

The Detention Center suggested we provide each Detainee a pint of ice cream for Valentine’s Day. They don’t ever receive dessert so it would make a special treat for them on Valentine’s Day. I will start fundraising and see what we can do. I added some Valentine’s Day cards to the Amazon wish list so the Detainees can send their loved one a card. The Center also let me know they need more stamps.

Tomorrow I will attempt to open the new PayPal charity donation link. I got the information so I can get on-line to the new Love in Action checking account today. Too tired to try it today.

Our Keurig machine wouldn’t work this morning. No lights would come on. Kathy tried plugging it into a different plug but that didn’t help. I went to Emporia and got a new one for Kathy this afternoon. Man are those machines expensive now. They only seem to last about two to three years. It was hard to find a simple one as they keep adding special features to them that we don’t need.

We got some rain today. I heard thunder this morning for a bit. We have a good sized pond in our yard so we must have gotten an inch or more. We were really dry and I appreciate the rain. I would much rather have rain than snow or ice.

Phil got the shower door installed today. He is installing a towel rack and then the back room addition is all but complete. I do have some outside painting to do next spring but other than that we are done. It will be so nice to have the second fully functioning bathroom. Kathy will move all her things from the other bathroom into this one.

The addition solved several problems I had with this house. I love having the litter box in the addition and out of the laundry room. Now I can go barefoot in the laundry room and not step on cat litter. The laundry room is staying much cleaner now.

My kitchen cabinets are not so full as I was able to move the overflow to the back room. It is so much easier to cook now that I can find things easily.

My bathroom will feel bigger and less cluttered now with only my stuff in it. Having two potties has been a game changer!

We are closer to the dog pen now so it is easier to get to the dogs. I do want to have a cement pad poured leading from the new back door to the dog pen next spring. The plastic tiles we put down are working well in the mud and rain.

I’m too tired to have even attempted to work on my tax prep today. I need to both work on my taxes and start working on the homework to pass the exams so I can do taxes for others for AARP. I need to pick up my computer I use to do taxes on and attempt to get certified before surgery next week. May not get it all done but I would like to knock most of it out of the way.

No plans for the weekend. I do have some cleaning I need to get done before surgery. I need to reorganize my bathroom when Kathy gets all her things out of it. It will be nice that we will each have our own space in bathrooms now.

One week from now surgery will be over and I will be spending one night at the hospital to recover. I was diagnosed last June with this problem so it has been a long time coming. It will be good to have it over with so the recovery can begin. Trusting I do as well with this surgery as I did with my hysterectomy 20 years ago.

Haven’t read too much of the news and have even had to do lots of fast scrolling on Facebook. I fall down a rabbit hole of despair if I read too much news. There is not much I can do about any of it. I do send emails to my representatives and senators, not that I think that makes much difference. My heart hurts with what is happening in the USA right now. I keep thinking we reach a tipping point and things will change but that tipping point hasn’t seemed to have happened yet. I see signs of a growing resistance which give me a bit of hope. How low will we go?

I have to stay in love and hold peace in my heart. The world will only change when all can do that. We can’t let our overwhelm, rage and anger be who we are and the place we function from.

Still feeling a bit congested and snotty. I thought I was getting better but today it came back hard. Hoping it is allergies and it will soon pass. Maybe this is the last blast of it and in a day or two it will be gone.

Grateful for the rain, grateful the new shower is ready to be used, and grateful for Phil and his efficiency.

Happy birthday to Craig. He would have turned 74 today. I have thought of him a lot today and felt him with me today.

I had to be in Topeka at 9:30 this morning. Luckily the doctor’s office was empty of other patients and I only interacted with the Doctor and nurse. I had to have a test done but they were able to do it while I was there and I didn’t have to come back. I got done around 10:35 and was home by 11:45.

I took a long nap after I got home. I had trouble waking up when the alarm went off this morning. I didn’t get to sleep until close to 1:30 and didn’t want to get up. I am still tired but much better after a long nap. No plans for a couple of days so maybe I can find lots of sleep.

The shower door came in today and Phil said he would put it in tomorrow. That will complete the addition. Phil started it in October and we moved in for the most part in December. I haven’t gotten the final bill from Phil yet so not sure how far over budget I am. We were fairly close but did go over what I had hoped I would need to spend. I had forgotten to budget for shower heads, grab bars, rugs, etc. Those things add up.

The Doctor’s office called with the results of the test that was done. I am in stage one so it is reversible with a change in diet and exercise. Maybe after surgery this will motivate me to do so. I have an appointment with my Endocrinologist the 23rd and am hoping she will give me a medication to help me get the results I need.

Other than a tax meeting next Monday night I don’t have anything on my calendar until surgery the 15th. I am going to KC the night before surgery to spend the night as I have to be at the hospital at 6:15 Thursday morning. I am staying in a hotel across the street from the hospital.

I do need to make another grocery run before surgery. I didn’t feel well when I was shopping Monday and I didn’t get all I needed. I won’t be able to lift over ten pounds for six weeks so need to get something’s in house so I won’t have to lift. I need a couple cases of water that definitely weigh over ten pounds each.

Hope to get after my tax prep work the next couple of days. It would be nice to have that taken care of. I have to be in the right mood to do it though so we shall see what happens. Still didn’t get the paperwork for the new Love in Action bank account so can’t move that project forward yet.

Got a note back from the Captain of the Center but not sure it got me where I need to be. I was hoping to get permission for a Valentine’s Day project so I could get the fundraising started for that. I will call him tomorrow and see if I can move the needle on that project. The transportation thing still feels complicated and not sure where we will end up. I have learned if things feel complicated or hard to not do anything and wait till the knots loosen.

Felt restless a bit today. Not sure where that is coming from. I will continue to sit with it and allow it to tell me what I need to hear. Sometimes I can figure it out and sometimes I can’t. My job is to allow it to be what it is, acknowledge it is there and then see what happens.

Grateful for a safe trip to and from Topeka today, grateful I can change the course of this diagnosis, and grateful for some empty space days ahead of me.

It is hard to type January when it is in the 50’s and 60’s. Feels like I moved my house and all somewhere else.

I am still in my pajamas. It has been another quiet stay-at-home day. I did get several loads of laundry done and the sheets on my bed changed.

Worked on taxes for a little while. All three rentals were to my kids/grandkid and that makes it a bit challenging to do the numbers. Not sure how the accountant is going to handle some of it. All I can do is give her the numbers and she will take it from there. I ended up selling all three and all three were handled differently. It is a complicated tax year.

Got notified that our first tax prep meeting is next Monday. I may get to one other meeting before surgery and will then have to figure out how to do everything without going to the meetings. I learned from a couple years ago not to take the tests alone until I check my answers. If I miss more than two questions I have to retake the test with different questions. I will talk to the leader and come up with a plan. Still not sure what recovery is going to be and what I will feel like being able to do. We start doing taxes the second week of February and I am hoping I will be up to doing them by then but can’t promise anything yet.

I love doing taxes but I really dislike the training and tests we have to do. They give us problems that we never see during tax season. I struggle to find the relevance of what we have to go through when I would prefer we spend time on the things we will see and need reminded how to handle.

Had someone I have helped with their taxes in the past reach out to me today. They need their taxes done. I was surprised to hear they have moved back to this area. I hope I can help them out again.

Tomorrow I have to be in Topeka at 9:30 so will have to leave around 8:15. That is early for me these days. Kathy has to be in Emporia by 8:15 so we will both be up early and getting ready.

No plans for the rest of the week. I was able to get some notes and cards written today that were on my to-do list. I still need to make an appointment with Jay at the Detention Center and firm up what we might do for the Detainees for Valentine’s and to have a deeper conversation about the transportation issue. The transportation thing is kinda complicated and I am not rushing into it until we know we can do it right. I didn’t get the paperwork for the new checking account so can’t proceed with the PayPay charity account yet. Hoping to get both of these issues wrapped up before surgery but that may not be possible.

I have been watching a show about rich bitches in Palm Beach. Talk about different realities and values! Not sure why I am watching it other than it reminds me there are lots of realities we are all living in at the same time and it is no wonder there is a values and communication gap. Kinda reminds me when Craig and I did a cruise to Alaska and some of the other guests on the ship were most concerned about receiving an invitation to sit at the Captain’s table. Just not my reality!

My congestion is getting better. The Flonase did the trick. I still get congested when I sneeze but am not so snotty all the time. I want to get over this stuff before surgery so it doesn’t slow me down afterwards. Still working to avoid people as much as possible so I don’t get the flu.

Sitting in a better place tonight than I have been for a couple of days. Not sure what switched but am grateful for it. This time of the year can be hard for me and it is nice to have a good day.

Grateful for another almost spring like day, grateful for another stay-at-home day, and grateful we each get to choose what reality and values we want to live in and with.

Went to Emporia this morning for a haircut at 11:30. Afterwards I walked over to 629 to meet Jason for lunch. Always a good day when I get to spend time with one of my kids.

After lunch I went to Walmart and picked up a few things. I needed some Dial soap as I am to wash my body the night before and the morning of surgery with Dial soap. Also got some Milk of Mag as suggested for after surgery. Found some Flonase and sinus rinse to see if it will help with my congestion. Picked up a few groceries and came home. I was worn out by the time I got home.

I got a check for a donation to Love in Action in the mail today. I am not actively fundraising now so it was a pleasant surprise. I always feel honored that people trust me with their donations. I am starting a new record of 2026 donations so this was my first entry for the year.

I didn’t get the on-line information for the new checking account I opened last week in the mail today. I am waiting for that before I proceed with opening a charity donation account with PayPal. Hoping to get that taken care of this week.

I sent a note to the Captain of the Center and proposed a Valentine activity we might do for the Detainees. Am waiting on a response back from him. Hoping I hear from him soon and can get the PayPal Charity donation account open so I can start fundraising for the activity. It will be interesting to see if people can switch to donating directly to Love in Action, Inc. or if donations will continue to come in my name. I will switch them to the proper account if that happens.

Had an email exchange today with a couple I met on my trip to England two years ago. We are like-minded and both of us are doing things to promote peace and understanding. Would love to see them again but they live in Tennessee so not sure what the chances are. Who knows, stranger things have happened.

Hoping the shower door comes in as expected on Thursday. It will be a relief to have the addition completed. I think I will be able to hop into the deep tub to take a shower after surgery but good to know I won’t have to if the doors get here and installed before. That is the last thing on the list of things to do to complete the addition.

No plans for tomorrow. Wednesday I have to be in Topeka at 9:30 so will have an early day as I will have to leave here by 8:25. Hoping to get some steps taken so I can start to resolve a liver issue and maybe some answers to some other gastric issues I am having.

It was good for me to get out today but I was surprised how tired I was when I got home. The more I stay home, the more it drains me when I get out. Struggling to find the right balance so I can do both without getting drained.

This warm weather is confusing my brain. I don’t remember a winter quite like this one before. We had a couple days of cold in December but nothing like we should be having. The ten day forecast is for temperatures in the 40’s and 50’s and even another 60 degree day. Wonder if and when winter will come this year.

Feeling quiet and a bit disconnected this evening. I don’t want to start a new project until after surgery but I have more than a week to go before surgery. I guess I will start working on my tax prep and see how far I can go on that. Will have to wait for tax forms to come in the mail before I can turn it in but I can get numbers gathered up on the three rentals I had.

Grateful for a haircut today, grateful for lunch with Jason, and grateful I get to stay home tomorrow.

This has been another stay-at-home day. I am still in my pajamas again. I didn’t fall asleep until after sunrise this morning so slept all morning. Hoping I can fall asleep much earlier tonight as I have to be in Emporia by 11:30 for a haircut tomorrow.

I didn’t even touch the Love In Action PayPal situation today. I needed to step away from it and let it rest. After I get the information that helps me get on-line to the new checking account, I will pick it back up and see what I can do to get a charity account open with PayPal.

Still feeling congested. I don’t run a temperature or have a cough but have lots of congestion. I lost my voice for a short time today. Wondering if I have a sinus infection. I will pick up some sinus rinse tomorrow while I am in town and some Flonase and see if they will help.

While I am in town tomorrow I need to stop and get some groceries. Starting to think about what I will need post surgery and I also need to get a couple of things the doctor recommended I have on hand when I get home from the hospital. I have to be on a liquid diet the day before surgery so need some things for that too.

Wednesday I see the Gastroenterologist for my liver issue. I have to go to Topeka for that appointment. Not sure what she will recommend I do but won’t be able to get much done before surgery the following week. Hoping the surgery takes care of some of the other gastric issues I have been having.

The new shower door is to be in here Thursday. Phil said he would get it installed as soon as it comes in. It will be nice to have the addition complete. Kathy is anxious to move into the new bathroom. It will be convenient to have the new walk-in shower for post surgery showers instead of climbing into the tall tub.

Feeling a bit blah and disconnected today. I am purposely staying home to avoid crowds of people so I don’t get the flu. It will be good for me to get out of the house twice this week. I will try to remember to wear a mask to keep myself safe.

Have had to turn the news off again. It is so hard to find facts and not fear mongering or exaggerated stories. Everyone has an opinion about what is happening but not everyone has facts. I do no one good if I fall into the rabbit hole of worry or fear.

Grateful I was able to find some sleep even if it was daytime, grateful for a day of rest, and grateful for warm temperatures again today.

I am still in my pajamas as it was a stay-at-home day. Can’t say it was a relaxing one though as I ran into some computer issues.

I wanted to open a new Venmo account for Love in Action, Inc. They can’t do charity accounts as you have to send a tax form for all donations over $250 and Venmo doesn’t provide mailing addresses for donors. My next option is a charity account with PayPal. They offer reduced fees for charities and provide information needed to send the required tax forms.

I have had nothing but trouble trying to open a Love in Action, Inc. account with PayPal. Since I use a small bank I have to enter the numbers manually. For some reason they are not taking the information but not saying why.

I had to open a new email account for Love In Action, Inc. so PayPal would know the difference between my personal account and the charity account. They needed to send me a confirmation email to open the email account. It took me forever to figure out how to open the new email account. Got that figured out but still don’t have the PayPal confirmed. I need to get to my bank account on-line and I don’t have the information from the bank yet to do that.

Sometimes these things are not as simple as I think they should be. I had some good advice from a friend though. He said to take a deep breath and start over from the beginning and go slow! How right he was. Thanks Richard! That advice probably works for most things in life.

After I get the on-line information for the new bank account for Love In Action, Inc. I will attempt PayPal again. I think they have to send two small deposits to confirm the account and then I have to tell them how much they were. Can’t do anything more until I can open the bank account on-line. That should happen sometime next week.

I know what I know about computers and sometimes it is not enough. I find it extremely frustrating when days like this happen. Silly me for thinking this would be easy. Cause and effect is hitting me hard again. I didn’t anticipate any of this when I solved one problem and created several others. And this too shall pass – maybe like a kidney stone – but it will pass!

Still full of snot but Kathy gave me a generic Flonase and it has helped. Next time I go to Emporia I will get some Flonase and see if that helps. It sure burns when it goes in though.

No plans for tomorrow. I may watch the Chiefs game if nothing else comes up. Kathy is going to a movie with some friends. She will enjoy that. I am not a big fan of going to the movie theater so I am staying home. I really don’t want to get the flu so am avoiding people as much as possible between now and the 15th. I do have to go to Emporia for a haircut Monday and will stop and pick up some groceries but I will wear a mask and get in and out as soon as possible.

Hulu has The Pitt on and I am binge watching it. I had heard good reviews about it and I am enjoying it. It is a bit realistic in places but I like that. Noah Wyle is a favorite of mine from ER days. He is all grown up now!

Feeling a bit frustrated with the day. Hoping tomorrow it will be an easier day. Not sure why these things seem hard sometimes. I keep reminding myself why I am doing it and that makes it a bit easier to plow through.

Grateful I got the new email confirmed at least, grateful tomorrow is a new day and a new chance to fix this, and grateful for friends that give great advice.

I didn’t fall asleep until about 6:00 this morning. I got a phone call at 8:30. It was from the glass company that I had ordered a shower door from. They told me they magically could have it in by next Friday. Initially they had told me it would take six to eight weeks. Not sure why the change. I told them to cancel the order as I had found something much cheaper elsewhere.

I was able to go back to sleep for a bit. Have felt very tired all day though. Not sure what night I am on that I have not been able to fall asleep close to the normal time. One of these days I will crash and burn and sleep the clock around.

Went to Emporia around noon. I stopped at City Hall and paid my water bill on the way out of town. Went to the Vet’s office to pick up flea and tick medication for the dogs and cats. Went to Walmart and picked up a prescription. Stopped at Taco Bell and used part of a gift card that I had gotten for Christmas to buy my lunch.

Stopped at the bank in CWF on my way to Emporia to open a new checking account for Love in Action, Inc. The lady that I needed to see was out to lunch so I left the paperwork and went back after my trip to town. I was able to get the account open. She gave me at least 30 pieces of paper about the account and I must have signed my name ten times. I will have to take some time to read through all the paperwork. Government regulations at its best -NOT!

A lady called me from St. Luke’s Hospital with pre-admission instructions. She called me while I was at the Vet office so I called her back after I got home. She was efficient and sent me written instructions to cover what we talked about. I have to stop several of my medications one week prior to surgery, some the day before and some I take the day of surgery. Hope I can keep it all straight. I need to remember to buy a bar of Dial Soap as I am to use that to wash all of my body both the day before surgery and the morning of. She moved up the time I am to be at the hospital to 6:15. Grateful I decided to go up the night before and spend the night at a hotel near the hospital. I am the doctor’s first patient of the day which means I should go back on schedule.

Attempted to open a Venmo account in the name of Love in Action, Inc. I can’t do that. IRS requires you send donors a form at the end of the year if a donor has given you more than $250. Venmo doesn’t give you the information you need for that. I have to use PayPal or explore one of the other app options. All of the options have a service fee involved. Dang it anyways. Silly me to think this would be easy! I got frustrated and had to set it down for the day. I’ll go back to it tomorrow and do what I need to do.

I spent some time reading about the tax requirements for a nonprofit. Dang, I can’t seem to get rid of tax complications! Hopefully I can do them myself. We do some small business returns with my tax work at AARP so I am familiar with the forms. Luckily I don’t anticipate lots of donations over $250 if this year is like the first year of it.

Anyone work with a nonprofit and have suggestions for me? I would welcome them.

There is a cause and effect from everything you do. I solved one problem with Love in Action by getting it out of my personal accounts yet created other problems with creating the nonprofit. Sometimes I feel like I spend my time chasing my tail.

No plans for the weekend other than figuring out how to receive donations for Love in Action and getting that set up. There is always housecleaning that could be done if the motivation finds me. It rarely does so am thinking I am safe from that!

Next week I have a haircut Monday mid day and a doctor’s appointment in Topeka Wednesday morning. Still have lots of empty space on my calendar. Today that feels soothing and welcoming to my soul.

I’ve had a very snotty nose the last couple of days. My throat gets sore but that only lasts for a few hours. No fever. No cough. Just lots of snot. Maybe my body is confused with the spring like conditions – I have a tree that is trying to bud out new leaves. Maybe my body thinks it is time for spring allergies.

I didn’t get any groceries today. Walmart was packed and I wasn’t in the mood for crowds. The line to get to the pharmacy was long enough for my patience level today. I will get some Monday when I go in and get my haircut.

So far I am still on my spending freeze. Haven’t been tempted by anything yet. I do give myself three strikes until I have to say I am done. My game – my rules – right? It is fun to play with myself and see how long I can go without buying something that isn’t edible or needed for the pets.

Sitting and thinking about cause and effect. I tend to jump in without thinking everything completely through. I knew some things about a nonprofit but didn’t know the issue with Venmo. I guess it makes sense but I don’t like paying service fees. I think I could bypass it but then there might be consequences I am unaware of now for that. One knows what one knows until you know more.

Grateful the bank account for Love in Action is open, grateful things work out sooner or later, and grateful I am somewhat flexible and can adjust to new learnings.

I remembered to use 26 instead of 25. Maybe I will get this sooner rather than later this year!

Happy New Year to one and all. A fresh start and a fresh calendar. Here is to new beginnings and new opportunities for growth, love and life.

I want to wish my Aunt Marylyn a happy 90th birthday. I called her and she said she had company for most of the day today. She is so special to me and I wish her much good health this year.

It has been a quiet day at home for me. I had trouble finding sleep last night. Attempted to sleep in this morning but kept getting woke up from dings from my phone. Finally turned it off so I could sleep and then couldn’t find more sleep!

Two different people let me know the hyacinths bulbs I gave them bloomed today. Mine are still waiting to express themselves. I love the smell of them and will enjoy them when they open.

My handyman found a shower door for much less than what AAA Glass quoted me. I got it ordered and it should be here in one week. I will call AAA Glass tomorrow and tell them they can keep their $2,200 shower door. This way I will have a walk-in shower to use if I need it after surgery the 15th.

Tomorrow I need to go to Emporia to pick up a new prescription and get a few groceries. I also need to go to a bank and open a new account for Love in Action, Inc. I also need to call the Captain of the Center and schedule a face-to-face meeting with him. I have some ideas of a Valentine project I want to do and I need permission to proceed.

I have been just this side of cranky today. I had trouble relaxing into the empty space today. I had several things I want to get done and couldn’t do them today due to the holiday. Sometimes I think I have days like this to remind me how special the days are that I can relax into the empty space. I need to experience both sides of the empty space to feel my range.

Two weeks from today I have surgery. Trusting it will be a relatively easy recovery and I will bounce back quickly. I put a reminder on my calendar to stop taking my baby aspirin next week. I’m grateful it it almost time to get it over with.

Next Wednesday I am going to Topeka to see the Gastrointestinal Doctor for a problem they found on the MRI they did for my heart. I saw her several years ago when I had C-Diff several times and found her helpful and easy to talk to. Not sure what she will be able to do but am hoping she will recommend something that will work.

I am hoping that surgery will fix several issues I have been having. I may be reaching too far with that hope but we shall see. At least if it doesn’t, I can proceed to find other solutions.

Grateful for my Aunt Marylyn and the love we share, grateful the hyacinths are starting to bloom, and grateful that this type of day shall pass.

This has been a quiet, stay-at-home type of day. I have never felt like I woke all the way up today. Kathy predicted I will become wide awake when I lay down to go to sleep tonight. Sounds about right!

I did go to Jacalito for lunch. I couldn’t think of something to fix and I needed real food.

The nonprofit paperwork for Love in Action, Inc. is complete! Yeah! Friday I will go to the bank and open an account and then open a new Venmo account. It feels good to have the paperwork done.

I am checking on liability insurance. Not sure we need it but if we start the transportation thing it would be a good idea. I will get a couple of quotes and see if it is anywhere near affordable. Have a feeling it won’t be but I may get surprised.

I doubt that I make it up till midnight tonight. We shall see. I’m tired and may head to bed soon. If Kathy is right and I wake up when I go to bed I might make it to midnight.

No plans to celebrate the New Year’s tomorrow. If I get ambitious I may make a pot of soup.

I do need to to to Emporia to pick up a prescription but not sure the pharmacy will be open tomorrow. I got a response back from the Cardiologist. She wants to only change one of the two blood pressure medications I am on to see if it will work. She wants me to give it a week or so and if I need more support than change the dose on the other medication too. That makes sense to me. My primary doctor wanted to increase the dosage on both at the same time.

My blood pressure has been good today. It was 125/69 earlier. That is without changing any dosage. Tonight it is 155/75. Man, I wish I could figure this out.

Hearing lots of reports about the flu and Covid going around. It is a good time for me to hole up and become a hermit and not get out and about. The last thing I want is to get the flu and delay surgery that is scheduled for January 15. I trust the hospital stay will not expose me to it.

I called the company that is ordering and then installing the new shower door. They quoted me over $2,200. Yikes! Had no idea it would be that much. They also said it will take four to six weeks. I told them I really need it by the 15th of January so I can use that shower after my surgery. They said they would see what they could do. Not counting on it!

A New Year always feels like a fresh start. It is good to get my pending list cleaned up and have very few things on my to-do list. I have become more intentional about what to pick up and carry these days. For way too many years I carried stuff that wasn’t even mine to carry. Time to let that shit go. I remember when I first heard about the concept of letting go. I initially thought it was a once and done type of thing. Little did I know then that it is a daily choice one must make.

Grateful the Love in Action paperwork is complete, grateful for at least one good blood pressure reading today, and grateful for a fresh start with a new year.

Ellexia and I met Nicole around 11:30 this morning. We went to lunch and then went to the Oak Park Mall where we shopped till we dropped. Actually I dropped and the other two kept going!

Ellexia found what she was looking for in clothes, I think. Not sure how many stores she hit but she did seem to know what she was looking for. She wanted one more thing but after looking at a couple of stores decided to order it on-line. I was good with that.

I was thinking about stopping at Costco to get something I forgot last time I went but I was done and couldn’t do it. I will go to Costco in another week or so after the holidays are over.

I got home around 4:30. It might be an early bedtime tonight! I am not a good shopper. Being around all the materialistic greed of a mall wears me out. That mall always seems to be crowded and full of shoppers carrying bags of stuff. Not sure how old that mall is but they have done a good job of making it look fresh.

Kathy asked me when I got home if I had found any bargains for myself. I told her I didn’t even look. I am on a spending freeze and I am proud to say nothing even tempted me.

Found out the problem with the paperwork for Love in Action. We may have to resort to snail mail to fix it but it will get fixed soon. I am hoping things will be resolved and the new accounts are opened before I have surgery January 15.

Tomorrow I need to make two phone calls if it is a good day for me to talk on the phone. I need to find out where the shower door is and put some pressure on them to get it here. I also need to call the Captain of the Detention Center and set up a meeting for next week. I have an idea of a Valentine project I want to do and need his permission to fundraiser for it.

In my Facebook memories I saw a picture of Roxy with her puppies from nine years ago. She had eight puppies, one was born dead and we lost another one a day or two later. The other six were healthy and have grown into huge dogs. Sophia is one of the six. Happy birthday Sophia!

No plans for the rest of the week. I may be up at midnight tomorrow night but will be in my chair in my pajamas. I am grateful December is all but over. It has felt like a very long month to me.

It was fun to spend time with Ellexia and Nicole today. My relationship with Ellexia keeps changing as she continues to grow up. We spent a bit of time today talking about the couple months Ellexia, Michelle and Tagen lived with me a couple years ago. She remembered me fixing dinner every night for her and fixing her favorite breakfast foods.

Today made me think of my journey to become somewhat of a minimalist. I think each person defines that differently but for me I had to learn to stop the incoming stuff into the house. A small house helps as I don’t like clutter and a small house can only hold so much stuff. Not sure I have ever been much of a shopper but way back when malls didn’t drain me like they do today.

My spending freeze helps remind me each year of all the stuff that comes in due to my impulsivity. I’m so grateful I have curbed most of it and my annual freeze reinforces that.

Grateful for the time today with Ellexia and Nicole, grateful for a safe trip to and from KC, and grateful for a mostly clutter free house to rest in tonight.

I didn’t fall asleep until almost 6:00 this morning. Dang, this is getting old! I did manage to get a couple hours of sleep finally. Good thing I didn’t have to get up and go somewhere on time today.

I did manage to go to Emporia to get some groceries. I am trying hard to fix a home made meal most days of the week. I ate at Applebee’s today so didn’t cook today.

Got what I needed at Walmart. It wasn’t crowded except for the employees that are shopping for others using those big blue carts. Some of those employees seem to be blissfully unaware of customers around them. I had to ask one of them to move their cart so I could get to what I needed. They weren’t too happy with me.

Came home and felt a bit out of step with myself. I sat in my chair and attempted a chair nap but don’t think I was able to sleep for long. Not sure why I don’t feel my best today – just one of those days I guess.

My primary doctor responded to the message I sent him about my blood pressure. He told me to do what I had decided to already do which is to double up on my meds on the days when my blood pressure is high. My Cardiologist hasn’t responded yet.

Found out the delay with the nonprofit paperwork for Love in Action. One of the other people that needed to sign off on it hasn’t done so yet. I bet the paperwork she needed went to junk mail. That is where my paperwork had gone. Hoping she can get it figured out and we can get this project wrapped up. I really want to get the bank account open and the new Venmo account open so I can start a Valentine’s Day project started.

Burr it was cold today. After being in the 70’s just a couple days ago the high 20’s felt cold. There was a bit of a wind too which made it feel even colder. I have had my little heater on today trying to stay warm.

Anyone else getting lots more spam and junk email than normal? I must be getting twenty or more a day. I keep blocking them but it doesn’t seem to slow things down.

My handyman sent me an email and let me know there will be a bit of a delay for the shower door. Sure hope that it comes in sooner rather than later. I would like to have that project wrapped up soon.

Tomorrow I am picking Ellexia up at 10:00 and we are going to KC for the day. We are going to Nicole’s house to pick her up and then going out for lunch. Doing some shopping after that. Kathy decided to stay home as she is not a shopper and it may be a long day.

It will be fun spending the day with Ellexia and Nicole. I probably need to get out and I love their company. We will have lots of laughs and a good time.

No other plans for the week. I don’t celebrate New Year’s Eve so have no plans for that. It will be good to get back to regularly planned scheduling next week. These last two weeks have been a challenge for me to know what day of the week it is.

The world feels like it pauses the week between Christmas and New Year’s. I like the pace of that. I am grateful I no longer have to rush from relative to relative to celebrate the holidays. I appreciated that my little family was able to celebrate early.

One year ago today I signed the final divorce papers. It was an end to a short marriage that did not work. I will be eternally grateful to those that supported me through that time in my life and helped me find myself again.

Grateful I was able to go to Emporia this morning, grateful for a warm house on a cold day, and grateful I get so spend the day with Nicole and Ellexia tomorrow.

Another quiet, stay-at-home day. I was going to go get groceries but couldn’t leave the house. We have had a cold front come through with high winds. So far we have avoided the snow other than a few flakes this afternoon. Not a good day to get out and about. The insulated overalls I gave Kathy came in handy today. She said they kept her nice and warm when she was walking the dogs this morning.

I made spaghetti and meatballs for dinner tonight. Wow! I have made home made meals daily for almost a week. I do feel better when I eat good for me food instead of junk food all day.

I didn’t do much else today. I am almost finished watching West Wing and am still binge watching it. I wonder how much it is based on reality and mirrors real life. I can only dream of a time when those in office can do the right thing as opposed to being concerned about being reelected and raising money.

It is interesting to see how electronic devices have changed over the years. On West Wing the computers are still massive and most of the phones are flip phones or the phones that had an antenna poking out of them. They also are using VHS tapes. Funny how those things date a show.

I do need groceries so may attempt to go to Emporia tomorrow. I am going to KC with Ellexia Tuesday so could stop and pick things up on the way home but I know I will be tired and won’t want to stop.

It is weird having a very short pending list and a very short to-do list. Other than working on my tax prep book most everything else is in the hands of someone else. They need to make a move before I can move next. I’m grateful most things got taken care of before the New Year begins. It is nice to go into the New Year with a mostly empty list. Feels like I have a clean slate to begin the year.

My memories on Facebook reminded me that three years ago I was finishing up my divorce. I have come a long ways from the emotional state I was in then. I have learned so much about myself, about boundaries, and how important it is to speak my truth. Sometimes the best lessons in life come from the hardest times.

Grateful for home made meals, grateful we didn’t get snow today, and grateful it is to warm back up again by Tuesday.

This has been another quiet stay-at-home day. Jason came out and picked up some New Year’s Cookies. It was nice to have a short visit with him.

Ellexia, Nicole and I decided that our girl’s day out will be Tuesday. I’m going to pick Ellexia up at 10:00. We will drive to KC and pick up Nicole then go out for lunch and then go shopping. Not sure what we are shopping for but Ellexia has some gift cards she wants to spend. It will be a fun day.

I started working on my tax prep workbook. I sold three rental houses this year so have lots of paperwork to find. I am so grateful it is the last year I have to find all the rental information to give to the accountant. I always feel like I am organized but there is always a piece of paper I have trouble finding.

I need some groceries so may go to Emporia tomorrow to pick those up. Trusting the store won’t be too busy. I am doing my best to avoid crowds these days.

Jason’s glasses broke while he was here today. It reminded me that I need to schedule an eye doctor appointment soon. I think I will not go back to Warby Parker again. I wasn’t excited about the last two eye exams I have gotten and their glasses aren’t any cheaper than other places anymore.

I sent a note to both my doctor and the Cardiologist about my blood pressure. I’ll see which one gets back to me Monday. I think I need a medication adjustment of some sort.

We have a cold front coming in Sunday but warmer temperatures are to come back by Tuesday. I could live in a climate where it is in the 70’s in January.

Sitting with a quiet head again tonight. Still struggling to find sleep but that is normal for me. These quiet days at home have been restorative for me. I can feel my soul slowing down and resting in the silence. I have finally learned to embrace empty space and allow it to reset my nervous system.

Grateful to see Jason today, grateful the tax prep work has begun, and grateful for empty space.

It has been a quiet stay at home day. I slept in this morning as I had trouble falling asleep last night. I feel more rested today than I have for a couple of days.

I made a meat loaf, baked potatoes and corn for dinner tonight. I am attempting to cook real food again. I wish I was better at using up leftovers. I do enjoy a home cooked meal but forget to plan and make them.

I worked on the Love in Action year-end numbers today. We raised over $8,100 plus approximately $10,000 worth of stuff was donated directly to the Center. Not bad for less than six months. Still waiting on the EIN number so I can open a bank account and set up a new Venmo number. It will be fun to see where this all goes in the New Year.

After the first of the year I will proceed with the project of transporting Detainees that get released. I also want to do a special Valentine’s project for the Detainees. Not sure what the Captain will allow me to do but I have a couple of ideas of things we can do to ask permission for.

It reached over 70 degrees here today. By Monday the high is to be in the 30’s. Gotta love Kansas weather – you never know what you are going to get.

No plans for the weekend. I am still working on the addition and getting the shelves better organized. I got a few small containers to put things in. I have used a couple and still have a few more available. They are see through so I can easily figure out what is in them.

Nothing on my calendar for next week. Ellexia and I are going to have a girls day out one day but other than that nothing planned. I have lots of empty space for the next couple of weeks. Right now that feels comfortable, although that can change. I hit the ground running when I came home from India and Nepal the end of November and it finally feels like I am caught up.

I need to give some thought about the word I want to choose for next year. Every year I pick one and it helps me focus on my inner awareness. I’m sure it will come to me soon.

I feel like I am back to my observer role of my life. I feel oddly detached from what is going on. Hard to describe the feeling but it is easier to be more objective from this place.

Grateful for a home cooked meal tonight, grateful for all the donors to Love in Action, and grateful for this peaceful valley I am in.

It has been a quiet Christmas Day. Kathy and I enjoyed New Year’s Cookies for breakfast. Reminded us of mom and days long gone.

I fixed what my mother called Flat Pancakes for a late lunch. Other people call them crepes! I fix a sweet white sauce to put over them. I hadn’t fixed them for a long time. They are one of Kathy’s favorites so I fixed them for her for our Christmas lunch.

Michelle came out and joined us for lunch. We had a nice long visit. I love when I get to do that with one of my kids one-on-one.

No plans for the rest of the week and weekend. There are too many people out and about for me to leave the house. One day next week I am taking Ellexia to KC for a girl’s day out day. I look forward to that.

With Christmas being on a Thursday I am really going to be out of step with time. With the football game on tonight it feels more like a Sunday than Thursday. Sunday will come quick this week!

Have a bit of a headache and my blood pressure is starting to go back up again tonight. Sure wish the doctor’s could figure out what is going on. I will double up on my meds again and then let my doctor know. I need a permanent fix!

My mind is quiet tonight. One of those nights where I can’t keep a thought very long. I’m tired so may go to bed early and trust I can sleep tonight. It has been a couple of nights since I have been able to sleep much.

Grateful Christmas is over for the year, grateful for the time with Michelle today, and grateful for a quiet weekend ahead.

I got New Year’s Cookies made today. I tasted one of them and they are edible. The dough felt too thick and it didn’t raise as much as I would have liked it to but they will do.

It was in the high 60’s here today. Man is it going to feel cold when it gets cold in January. I could get used to this mild weather in the winter except I know it isn’t good for the plants.

Michelle and Jason are coming over tomorrow. I bribed them and told them I would make flat pancakes, also known as crepes. I make a sweet white sauce to put over them. I also have some peaches to put on them before they are rolled up. Jason likes cream of mushroom soup on his. I haven’t made them for a long time – hope I remember how.

Worked a bit on the Love in Action paperwork. I am compiling a year end report. The numbers were not adding up for me so had to stop and will go back to it another time. I have finally learned that if things aren’t easy to stop and go back to the project later. There is usually a reason I wasn’t supposed to do it the first time.

I haven’t found my Christmas spirit again this year. I have come to terms with that and accepted that I don’t have to. Winter Solstice is an inner thing and I have found my inner peace which may be the same thing as Christmas spirit I guess.

When I was at a funeral last week I remembered why I can’t do the “church” thing any more. The pastor did a good job but the way the “church” interpreted scripture just doesn’t fit with my understanding anymore. Too much fear in their interpretation. I believe heaven is on earth and we all return to spirit when we die, regardless of the choices we made in this lifetime.

No plans other than making crepes tomorrow. It will be a quiet day at home. I don’t plan on leaving the house all weekend as there will be too many people out and about for my liking. One day next week I want to take Ellexia to KC for the day for a girls day out. That will be fun and something to look forward to.

December has felt like it has been three months long. I am so out of time that when events happened don’t make sense to me. It has been less than two weeks since the kids came home to celebrate Christmas and it feels like it was at least a month ago. The trip to India and Nepal that I did in November feels like it was a year ago.

Tomorrow I will reread the few Christmas cards I got and take care of them and my Christmas “decorations” will be done for the year. I no longer decorate. I do have a brand new artificial tree I had purchased from IKEA that is still in the original box unopened that I need to find a new home for. I think it has lights on it but I don’t remember. If you need a new one, let me know and you can come get it.

Sitting in a quiet space tonight. Christmas this year has felt very stress free for me. I honored my boundaries and didn’t do things that didn’t feel right to my soul. I cherish my peace and quiet and that is what Christmas has been this year.

Grateful the New Year’s Cookies are made, grateful for an almost 70 degree day, and grateful for the peace and love of the season.

I didn’t fall asleep until around 5:00 this morning. That’s what I get for taking a long chair nap in the middle of the afternoon.

Had five dear friends over for happy hour this afternoon. It is such a delight to sit and visit with like-minded women where any and every topic is fair to bring up.

No plans for tomorrow. I need to get one thing for what I am fixing for Christmas Day for dinner. I think Dollar General will have it so I won’t have to go to Emporia. Kathy wants some New Year’s Cookies so I may try to get those made tomorrow. Jason likes them too so if he comes Christmas Day he can take some home.

Waiting to hear back from my attorney that is working on the Love in Action paperwork. I have a feeling that she has taken some time off for the holidays and won’t get back until after the New Year.

It is to be almost 70 on Christmas Day. This warmer weather is unsettling. Wonder when winter is going to hit. At least as this point it will be a short winter.

My blood pressure is finally down to 135/77. I trust that it will stay down for a bit. I am back to taking my normal dose of medication along with the one new pill. I had been taking lots more of each to get it to come down. It is a mystery to me what caused this spike and how long it will stay down.

We just had a short power failure. Only lasted a few seconds. That is hard on electronics though. Now I get to reset clocks and my computer. Wonder what caused the failure.

Feeling a bit unconnected tonight for some reason. I think I do that every Christmas as an escape. I am grateful Christmas will soon be over. I am attempting to hold on to the peace that Winter Solstice brings and keep my focus on that.

Grateful for dear friends that share their lives with me, grateful for a warm, winter day, and grateful the power came back on.

Went to Council Grove late morning and met a dear friend for lunch. We ended up visiting for over three hours! It is always a good day when I get to have a deep, soul-to-soul conversation with a friend.

I stopped at the grocery store in Council Grove afterwards and picked up a few things. I love the service at that store as the clerks are usually very friendly and someone carries your groceries to your car.

Came home and took a long chair nap. Not sure I will sleep tonight as my nap was way too long. Not sure why I was so tired but I must have been.

The doctor’s nurse, that is doing my surgery January 15, called and left me a message. I have to be at the hospital at 6:30 now instead of 8:30. Dang, now I will have to leave by 4:15 in the morning. I might go up the night before and sleep in a hotel near the hospital so I can get more sleep. Guess I will be sleeping most of the day of surgery so not sure it matters but leaving at 4:15 will be very inconvenient and early for Jason who is going to take me.

Tomorrow I have some friends coming for Happy Hour at 3:00. It will be nice to see my friends this week. Love when we can find the time to gather and visit.

No other plans for the rest of the week. The stores will get too busy for me to be out and about so will plan on staying home for a couple of days. One day next week I want to take Ellexia to KC for the day so we can go shopping and have lunch with her Aunt Nicole. We did that last year and had a fun girl’s day out.

One day this week I will write up a year end review for Love in Action and report the final year’s numbers. I need to remember to call my attorney tomorrow and see what the status of the paperwork for the nonprofit is. I keep forgetting to call.

I am embracing this time of respite and quiet. Working to tie up all my pending projects so I can go into the New Year with a clean and empty slate. My pending list is getting empty. Maybe I will see how long I can keep it empty just like my spending freeze. A long time ago empty space would have terrified me. I have changed and now embrace it.

Grateful for time with a friend, grateful for old-fashioned grocery stores, and grateful for empty space.

Winter Solstice! It feels like the earth stops for a couple of days and then begins to turn again. This is a wonderful day to set intentions for the coming year. What fruits are you going to bear next year? What gifts are you going to share with the world? Can you allow yourself to rest and hibernate and then only pick up the things to carry forward into the new year that serve you best?

One of my favorite Winter Solstice Blessings reminds me that this is the sacred pause – the longest night – where darkness is not something to fear, but a place of renewal and remembering.

We can only know light if we can embrace the dark.

This has been a quiet day at home for me. I am still in my pajamas. I had trouble sleeping last night and stayed in bed most of the morning. I watched the Chiefs game and have rested this afternoon. I love the quiet pace of life I have right now. It feels like my body is preparing me for something to come.

Phil worked on the addition today. He is finished except for hanging a safety bar in the shower and a towel bar in the bathroom. Now we need shower doors and this project will be done! The bathroom turned out beautifully. It feels luxurious and is a very welcome addition to this house. The back room is making cooking so much easier for me as I can find what I need so much easier. The laundry room is staying clean as we moved the pet feeding station to the back room.

Next spring I will contact the cement guys and have them pour a sidewalk from the back door to the door of the dog pen. I also will need to paint under the eaves on the back of the addition.

I think the addition was the last thing on my list of things that needed done to this house. I had thought about adding a garage but have decided not to pursue that. We did OK last winter and when the weather is bad we don’t get out anyways. There really isn’t a place to build a garage that makes sense the way the house is situated on these three lots. We would end up walking farther to get into the house than we do now.

It’s the time of year that I start a spending freeze. I do it every new year and play a game with myself to see how long I can go without spending money except for consumables like gas, groceries, medication, etc. Last year I went almost three months. I have a tendency to be impulsive and this little game helps me recognize that and manage it better.

Nothing on my calendar for this week. I may plan a little something on Tuesday but haven’t decided for sure yet. Kathy and I will spend a quiet Christmas Day watching the Chiefs play and eating soup. Jason and Michelle may come join us but we shall see.

I do want to write a year end report for Love In Action and report on the nonprofit status. After the New Year I want to get a meeting on the books with the Captain of the Detention Center and the Chase County Sheriff so we can talk more about the transportation issue. I think I have come up with some solutions and want to share those ideas so we can get that project up and running by spring.

Sitting in a quiet space tonight. Winter Solstice seems to bring a calmness and quiet to the world if one can slow down and tune into it. I relish these quiet days at home where the rhythm is slow and peaceful. Stepping out of the hustle and bustle of the holiday chaos and embracing the quiet. I can feel the energy of the world slowing down and resting. All is well, in all manners of all things, all is well.

Grateful for a quiet day at home, grateful the addition project is all but done, and grateful for Winter Solstice and all the lessons it brings.

It has been a quiet day at home. I did manage to make a crock pot meal today. I have not been eating good food lately and it is time to change that. I fixed green chicken and had some potatoes and broccoli with it. I forgot how good home cooked food tastes.

Did a bit of paperwork today. I think I am caught up on all of it. Got the insurance check that will pay for the repair of Kathy’s car. Not sure when I will get around to getting it scheduled.

Still struggling to get my blood pressure down. It has been around 160/85 most of the day. Not as high as it was in the doctor’s office but still too high. I will have to call my doctor Monday and see what he recommends.

Kathy and I were commenting today about how long December seems to be lasting. We were done with Christmas on the 13th and that feels like it was weeks ago and we still have 11 days of December left.

Winter Solstice is tomorrow. It is the best part of this holiday for me. It reminds me that light is always there even when it feels far, far away. Solstice invites us to slow down, rest, and trust that the light is returning. I have become a seeker of light and attempt to be a light to others. Sometimes our walk is made easier when there is a light on the path.

No plans for tomorrow except possibly watching the Chiefs game at noon. I worked a bit on the back room today and will continue to do more tomorrow. I need to go get some small containers. I may see if Dollar General has them so I don’t have to go to Emporia. Have a feeling the stores in Emporia will be crowded with lots of last minute stressed out shoppers.

Grateful for a quiet day at home, grateful for a home cooked meal, and grateful for the return of the light.

Nine years ago today my families lives changed forever. Chris, my son-in-law died unexpectedly. Today we remember all that he is and all that he brought to our family. We hold on to our memories of the time we had with him and the love we share.

I took a rest day today. I am still in my pajamas and I took a long nap this afternoon. It was a crash and burn day for me today.

Around noon the FedEx brought a package to the door. It was addressed to me and when I opened it I found a dozen long stemmed roses. The card seemed to be written to Kathy but the box had my name on it. I took a picture of the roses and put it on Facebook and found out a dear friend from NY had sent them. The roses will be a beautiful reminder of our friendship and the time we spent together earlier this year when we got to meet face-to-face for the first time. Thank you Mary Ellen! We love you!

My blood pressure has been better today although it is not yet as low as I would like it to be. I doubled up on some of my medication and I will continue to take more than prescribed as the PA recommended yesterday until I can get it down to “normal”. Sure wish I knew why it jumps like it does and what to do about it when it does.

I started some hyacinth bulbs in water before I left for India. When I got home I planted them in dirt in a pot. They are sprouting now and should be blooming in a couple of weeks. It has been fun giving them to people. After they bloom in the pot, they can be planted in the ground and should come up again next year. It will be nice to have a taste of spring in the heart of winter.

Trusting tomorrow I might get something done. I don’t have a lot on my plate right now but I do have some little things I need to take care of sooner or later. I have a little less than four weeks before surgery to get this house in good order.

Winter Solstice invites us to slow down and allow the new change in the universe to slowly begin. It is a holy pause between darkness and dawn. Hibernating instincts are strong right now. I am embracing this logic this year and allowing myself to have moments, hours, and even days of rest.

Grateful for the gift of roses, grateful even more for the gift of friendship, and grateful for this time of holy pause.

I went to Emporia this morning to go to a funeral. It was the mother of a friend that was our babysitter for a summer way back when we lived in Naperville, IL. Her mother worked with my mother during that time frame. It was a lovely service and I got to hug my friend.

After the funeral I had an appointment with my Cardiologist. For some reason my blood pressure was sky high today 210/120. Yikes! It earned me another pill to take each day. I have to take my blood pressure two times a day and track it. If it doesn’t settle down within a week I am to call the doctor’s office and report in.

The Cardiologist has no idea why my heart rate jumped the first part of August and hasn’t settled back down. They did the full cardiac work up and it didn’t show anything. They have no idea if this is my new norm or if things will eventually settle back down again. The PA I saw today said I am a mystery to them.

Nicole mentioned jumping timelines this afternoon and I wonder if that affects your heart rate. Makes as much sense as anything else!

Got my bedroom closet put back together again. Found some things I can get rid of. A friend came over and got the weighted blanket I had but I won’t use again. Still have a couple other things to give away or donate. I will try to get that taken care of this weekend.

Have a stretch of empty space for the next couple of weeks. I have absolutely nothing on my calendar until the second week of January.

Have some things with Love in Action to wrap up to finalize the nonprofit paperwork. Once that gets done I need to get a Venmo account open as well as a checking account. Still need to come up with additional services we can offer to the Detainees and figure out the transportation project.

Now that I have all that I am going to store on the back room I want to go back through it all and organize it. One of the racks only has three shelves and I think I want to replace it with one that has more racks. I also need to get some more transparent storage containers to put like items in so they take up less space and are easier to find. I still want to find more things to get rid of.

One of the people I follow on Facebook that is an expert in Narcissistic behavior made a post today. She has been very vocal lately about Trump and his narcissistic actions. She posted today that she realized she had gotten sucked in and needs to back up and stop reacting to what he says and does. Narcissistic people thrive on reactions from others. They don’t care if it is positive or negative. They just want the attention. Her post helped me understand why I decided a while back to no longer post anything about Trump on my page. I didn’t fully know why at the time other than it didn’t feel good. Wonder what would happen if we all quit posting about him and ignored him completely. I will continue to focus my political energy on Love in Action and create something positive out of this mess.

Grateful for friendships that span years and years, grateful for blood pressure medication, and grateful to have gotten rid of one more thing out of my closet.

This has been a bit of a frustrating day. The heat and air guys came and couldn’t do the job. They had to go to Plan B due to lack of space to cut a hole. Plan B requires Phil to cut the hole as it is through some material that the heat and air guys didn’t feel comfortable doing.

Phil and I talked and for now we are pausing adding heat and air to the back room. I have a space heater that has a thermostat on it that is keeping the back room nice and comfortable. We shall see what happens when it gets really cold or really hot next summer. For now, we are leaving things as they are.

I feel like I waited eight weeks for nothing except a bill from them doing nothing. Not sure what Plan C will be if we need to add heat or air.

Phil wants me to contact a glass company to have them do the shower door. I have to wait until he is done with tiling the shower and then have someone come bid the shower doors. Hope it doesn’t take long to get the material they will need and they can get them installed fairly quickly.

My bed is full of stuff I took down from the top shelf of my closet. I need to sort through it and get rid of somethings and put the stuff I want to keep back up. I would like to be able to sleep in my bed tonight so better get to it!

I finally got my box of thyroid medication after it being mailed USPS on November 26. I hope it hasn’t been frozen somewhere along the line. Not sure why it took so long – usually I get it in about five days.

I reread the paperwork I got regarding Love in Action. Both sets of paperwork were not official mail – they were from “sponsors” of the government. I wonder how they got my information? Grateful I read the fine print today and didn’t fall for their bullshit. Man, I hate spammers.

Went to Emporia to the water department to get the water out of my name for the rental I sold in November. They won’t be able to disconnect it until Friday. The lady had no answer for me when I asked why they hadn’t returned my phone call four weeks ago.

I stopped at Walmart while I was in town and got a new can opener. The other one barely worked and had a plastic sleeve missing.

I also stopped at Bluestem and got some more four inch nails. Kathy worked all day laying the new plastic tiles for the dog pen. I helped her a bit hammering some nails in. That project is complete and we will see what happens when it rains or snows. Not sure if they will hold up for long but fingers crossed it will work. At least now the dogs have a place to lay down if the ground gets wet.

I got a $240 Venmo donation from a group of 12 women for the Love in Action project. How very kind of them! They sent a note saying they are spreading some kindness and liked the work we are doing in Love in Action.

The insurance company handling the damage that was done to Kathy’s car when the neighbor backed into it sent a settlement offer. It is over $5,000! Yikes! I need to take Kathy’s car somewhere to a body shop and get an estimate. The insurance company will pay more if the body shop can justify why they need more. The car is very drivable as is so that project may wait a bit. They will allow me to rent a car during repairs if needed. Anyone know of a good body shop that can replace a driver’s side front door on a Subaru?

Tomorrow I have a doctor’s appointment in Emporia around 1:00. I have a funeral to go to at 11:00. Maybe I’ll have time for lunch in between.

Found out the wife of one of my mother’s first cousin died. I loved that lady and her family and I send my love to her six children and her grandchildren. She will be missed greatly. I will need to let some family know about it. This is the second death of extended family this month.

I have nothing on my calendar for the next couple of weeks after my doctor’s appointment tomorrow. That should give me some breathing space. I feel like I put things on hold to do Christmas last week and I need to pick pieces of my life back up again. Most of my projects are completed and it is time to look to bring something new in. I have four weeks before surgery to get some things done as I will have to take a six week break after surgery.

Grateful the dog pen project got completed today, grateful for this warm winter day, and grateful my thyroid medication showed up at long last.

Kathy and I went to Wichita today. Our first stop was to visit our 90-year-old Aunt, our mother’s last remaining sister. We had a delightful visit with her. It feels like I got to talk to my mother today! I took her some Christmas treats and Kathy took her a lap robe that she had crocheted.

Our next stop was at Chipotle for lunch. It is one of my favorite places to have lunch.

Our last stop was at Costco. It was not busy! I was surprised I could find a close up parking space. We didn’t even have to wait long in line to check out. It feels like I forgot something but got everything on my list except water. I wasn’t out of water and I can get some at Walmart if I run out before I get back.

I am tired tonight. Not sure why the trip wore me out but it sure seems to have. It was good to get home late afternoon and get the car unloaded. I still don’t have everything put away but I will before I go to bed.

Tomorrow the heat and air guys are to come to get the addition connected to the heat and A/C. I will need to empty out my closet so they can get to the attic access hole. The top shelf of my closet needed gone through so this will give me the chance to do that. I hope I can get rid of some of the stuff.

I need to go to Emporia tomorrow and go to the water department. I got another bill from them that goes way past the sale date. I had called them and they never called me back so I will go in person and get the water out of my name. The bill showed no water usage but it was $56. Evidently no one lives there yet.

I will go back to Emporia Thursday to go to my Cardiologist appointment. I will need to stop and get some groceries either tomorrow or Thursday. I have been so focused on making Christmas treats that I have let my everyday groceries deplete.

I didn’t call the attorney that is working on making Love in Action a nonprofit today so I need to call her tomorrow. I am not sure what she is doing and what I need to do to finalize the paperwork.

Winter Solstice is this weekend. I may try to pull together a ceremony of some sort for it. The return of the light is a reason to celebrate and gather with friends. It is the highlight of the season for me. It feels like the beginning of new hope and dreams and intentions and a chance to be new again with a fresh start.

Grateful for the time with my dear Aunt today, grateful the Costco trip is done, and grateful I am tucked in at home for the night.

This has been another quiet day at home. I did work on the addition and got things straightened out. Kathy took several trips to the shed to take things that don’t belong in the back room. It still looks too crowded to my likings but there is a bit of empty space on the shelves. I will have to go through everything one more time and see if I can find some more things to get rid of.

I still have some paint cans and a few other things to relocate to a different room. Phil will need a bit more of the paint to finish up the bathroom so want to wait until he is done to move it. I need to go through all the paint and get rid of some of it. I have two gallons of outdoor paint that I didn’t use that I need to find a new home for. The rest of it is leftover paint and I need to make sure I need it.

Next spring I will have to clean out the shed again and find things to get rid of. I really don’t like keeping things just in case and need to pare down what I have both in the shed and the back room.

The insurance guy came and took pictures of the car. He said it would take a couple days before they get the results to me. I want to stop at Subaru tomorrow to see if they will give me an estimate to fix it so I will know if I should accept the offer from the insurance company.

Tomorrow I am going to Wichita to visit my aunt and to go to Costco. I have a long list of things I need from Costco. I hope they won’t be too busy but this time of year that is a big hope.

It was nice that it warmed up a bit today. I really dislike the cold weather we had over the weekend.

I got initial paperwork that will make Love in Action a nonprofit. I need to call the attorney tomorrow and make sure I understand what needs to happen next. I think I have to send a check for $75 to the state to finalize the paperwork. They also said something about applying for a federal EIN number. Not sure how to do that and if I need to do that or if the attorney is going to.

I hope to get all the paperwork done by the first of the year and then get a bank account open. I need to ask the attorney if I should wait to get it all completed in January so I don’t have to pay to register it again in 2026. I need to find out what the tax reporting responsibilities are and if I have to send in annual fees like you do for a LTD. Company.

Won’t be long before I have to start putting together tax information. I am so grateful this is my last year to do that for rentals. I hope that my accountant overestimated my taxes and I get some of what I prepaid back. Next year it will be much easier to estimate my tax liability since I will just have interest income.

This empty space before surgery feels rich somehow. I cherish my quiet days at home and very little on my to-do list. I did feel a big antsy for a while today and not sure what that was all about. I sat with it and it passed.

Grateful the back room is almost in order, grateful it was a bit warmer today, and grateful to have received the next round of paperwork for Love In Action, Inc.

This has been a rest and recovery day. I have done nothing today except make a batch of chili. Other than that I have sat in my chair and binge watched West Wing. I also watched the Chiefs game. Sounds like their season is over.

Tomorrow the insurance guy is coming to look at Kathy’s car. Not sure if he will write a check on the spot or what happens next. I hope to work on the back addition tomorrow and get it put into order.

I may try to go to Wichita on Tuesday if the weather is good. I want to get that drive over and the things I need from Costco in house. It will be good to see my Aunt and spend a bit of time with her. We have had a death in the family and gathering with family is healing.

Wednesday the heat and air guy is coming to extend the system to the addition.

Thursday I go to Emporia for a Cardiologist appointment. Friday is an empty space day as of now.

Have been giving some thought to Love in Action and what I hope to accomplish next year with it. I have never set any goals with it. It has already raised more money than I thought possible and know we can raise lots more if we have a defined purpose for them. They have enough cards and stamps to get them through most of the year. They are well stocked with recreational equipment although occasionally they ask for something new. Their supply of stuffed animals should last them a long time.

We still need to find some solutions to the transportation issue. I am thinking of recruiting some people that will sign up to be an Uber driver and they would do the transporting. That would cover the liability issue. We would also need volunteers to be an advocate. Each person released will have different needs and will need someone to figure out what those are and to be able to provide resources to meet those needs. They may need a place to spend the night, a bus ticket, a phone, etc.

I am still thinking the county needs to be involved somehow as this is a county safety issue. Not sure what they might do or even be willing to do but it feels like it needs to be a joint issue.

I will continue to hold all of this and listen carefully to soul nudges and see where this is all going. I never would have predicted what has happened so far and will do my best to allow something new to come through.

Grateful for a day of rest, grateful it is to warm up this week, and grateful for all the possibilities for Love in Action.

I am in the recovery phase of a beautiful day. There is nothing I enjoy more than having all my kids home. It was one of the better Christmas celebrations we have had.

I tried making the macaroni and cheese in the crock pot today so I could get it done and the dishes cleaned up early. It worked well. I will probably make it in the crock pot from now on. Besides the Mac and cheese I also fixed a green bean casserole. The kids all brought the rest of the meal.

Jason makes what he calls Pig Tails. He takes a pork loin and cuts it into finger size pieces. Soaks them in buttermilk and then deep fries them after dipping them in a flour mixture. Everyone enjoys them and I didn’t have to cook! Michelle brought mashed potatoes and Nicole brought a broccoli salad. It was a treat for me to eat someone else’s food.

We also celebrated Ellexia’s 16th birthday today. She loved her cake and that was our dessert for the day in addition to all the cookies and treats I had made.

We played three different games that were fun. We gave up doing gifts for each other and play games instead. Everyone had fun and all raked in the bounty of the prizes.

I am about 60% done with the clean up. I am letting the dishes air dry and then I will put them away and wash up the remaining few. Then the kitchen needs a good wipe down and the floor needs mopped.

I had the kids move the things that had been stored on the front porch to the new addition. Tomorrow I will need to go through the totes I had stored things in and find out what is in them and then find places for all of the stuff I need to keep in the new addition. The last shelving unit fits nicely and I think once I get everything on shelves we will have plenty of room back there. Right now things are scattered here and there and it is disorganized. Too tired to deal with that tonight.

I got rid of lots of the treats but still have lots left. I will have to make another batch of fudge and peanut brittle to share with my brothers. I still need to make New Year’s Cookies and will get all that made sometime next week.

I can officially say Christmas is over for me this year. It was one of the least stressful Christmas’s I have ever had. Everything seemed to come together fairly easily and today was a very relaxing and fun day. Now to to look forward to the New Year.

Next week isn’t too busy for me. The insurance guy is coming to look at Kathy’s car Monday and let me know how much they are going to pay to fix the driver’s side door. Wednesday the heating and air guys are coming to add heat and air to the addition. Thursday I have a Cardiologist appointment in Emporia. I want to go to Wichita one day next week. I’ll see what the weather does and find some time to go to Costco and go visit my Aunt.

Getting the back room sorted out and organized will be my priority for next week. I also have some things left on the porch that need taken to the shed or moved to the back room. It was too cold today to mess with them. I was grateful for what did get moved off the porch.

Basking in the afterglow of the day. Lots of laughter and love in the house today. We do have fun together and enjoy each other. Tagen wasn’t able to come as he had to work and I missed him. Grateful all the others were able to come.

Grateful for a beautiful family day, grateful Christmas is over this year, and grateful for a warm house on this cold day.

This has been a quiet day. I did go to Emporia to pick up a cake and stop at Walmart for ice cream to go with the cake. Came home and took a chair nap for two hours.

I got the game we are doing tomorrow ready but other than that have done nothing else today except make the bourbon slush. I was going to make New Year’s Cookies but decided they could wait till next week. I needed a day of rest so I could be rested and have more fun tomorrow.

The insurance company that is settling the claim from when the neighbor backed into Kathy’s car called and they are sending an adjuster to me next week. I really disliked them having me take pictures and do the work for them. We shall see what they offer.

Tomorrow all I have to fix is Macaroni and Cheese and a green bean casserole. The kids are bringing the rest of the meal. While the kids are here I am going to have them help me move the stuff that is on the front porch to the new addition. It will be nice to have a clutter free porch again.

Next week I have a Cardiologist appointment Thursday. I want to go to Wichita one day next week as I am overdue for a shopping haul at Costco. I would like to go see my Aunt while I am in town. I’ll have to find a day and make it happen. The weather is to be delightful next week so it will be a good time to go.

The heating and air guys are to come next Wednesday and finally get that job done. I hope they don’t make too big of a mess cutting the vents. Phil is planning on being here to supervise which makes me feel better as he always cleans up after himself well. I also like knowing he is watching them as I know he will make sure they do the job correctly.

Nicole called today and said what I had been thinking that our trip to India and Nepal was only three weeks ago according to the calendar but it feels like it was months ago. We both hit the ground running preparing for Thanksgiving and I don’t think I have slowed down much since then. My relationship with time is wacky.

Looking forward to tomorrow and having the kids home. It will be good to have Christmas over and I can start thinking about 2026. I am not a goal setter but I do like to set intentions for my personal growth. I chose a word each year that helps me stay focused on what I want to accomplish personally.

I look forward to Winter Solstice and the return of the light. I do better when the days have more light. Time to name and claim my gifts and allow them to come into bloom in the New Year.

Grateful for a restful day, grateful tomorrow is family day, and grateful most of my projects and pending items are all coming to a close.

Happy birthday to my sweet granddaughter Ellexia. She turned 16 today. Oh my goodness, how is that possible. I remember the day she was born like it was yesterday. She is tiny but mighty, independent and sensitive. I look forward to celebrating with her on Saturday.

I went to Emporia late morning. I needed to get some bourbon to make the bourbon slush and I went to Walmart to get the orange juice and lemonade for the slush. I grabbed a quick lunch at Braun’s and then went to a nursing home.

I met a family that is facing both parents having declining health. They are navigating the complex issue of nursing home payments and supporting the other parent at home. None of this is easy and feels like a huge maze where the path out is not marked.

We had a good discussion and I hope they found it helpful. I referred them to a couple of people that helped me through the maze earlier this year. They will contact me again if they get stuck and need more help.

We talked about what the parents wanted for their death plan. These are not easy conversations and the family did a great job stressing to the parents it was totally their choice. We talked about a DNR, etc. Got a few things decided with more decisions that need to be made.

I stopped at the Post Office and dropped off my Christmas cards on the way to town. Felt good to have them on their way. Trusting they will get to where they are going before Christmas – can’t say I believe that will happen for all of them. The postal service is not what it used to be.

I came home and have done nothing this afternoon. I was going to make peppernuts today but so far haven’t gotten that done. I still might get them made, we shall see. Tomorrow I want to make New Year’s Cookies and then the first batch of everything will be done. I may need to make a second batch of a few things next week depending on what is leftover Saturday.

I decided on the game I want to do and got the rest of the things I needed for that today. I need to put it together tomorrow but that won’t take too long. Deciding on what to do was the hard part and I got that out of the way.

Phil worked on the new bathroom today. He is working on putting tile up for the shower. I would guess he is 60% done. After he finishes installing the tile and grouting it he will put up the shower doors and finish some painting and then I think he will be done. I love the addition and am so glad I did it. It fixes several things I didn’t like about this house. Much cheaper than building a new house!

I got a check in the mail from a utility company that I been working with to get it since July. I will need to make two calls tomorrow to find out how to handle the check – hopefully it will be easy and this little project can be done.

I have to run to Emporia tomorrow to pick up a cake. I need to touch base with the baker and see what time I need to be there.

I will be grateful when Christmas is over Saturday. I feel like I have put other things on hold to get ready for it. Luckily it has felt fairly easy this year to get things ready. I will have lots of empty space after Saturday to start to prepare for surgery January 15.

Felt good to be in service to a family today. In a perfect world it would be easy to navigate through end of life care but that is not real world. I think someone could have a successful business helping people navigate our very broken system and provide a one-stop shop to help people through it. If I were 15 years younger I would consider doing that.

Sitting in a good head space tonight. Getting excited about having all the kids home Saturday. I love family days – they are my favorite days of the year. It will be a fun day and easy for me as the kids are all bringing part of the lunch.

Grateful to share my experience and knowledge with a family today, grateful I didn’t have to wear a coat today, and grateful Christmas is in two sleeps.

I went up to the Detention Center this morning at 10:00. The Captain was out sick but I was able to drop off the Walmart gift cards to the Sheriff. We had a good conversation. He expressed his appreciation for all we are doing for the Detainees and the Center.

We had a long conversation about transporting released Detainees. He recommended I attempt to find a third-party transportation company. It is possible that volunteers could sign up to be an Uber driver and only Uber released Detainees. That way Uber would carry the insurance liability risk. I will look into how difficult it is to become an Uber driver. The Sheriff agrees that the risk for volunteers is too high and that he would not recommend we do that.

I did ask him if there were other things we could do for the Detainees. He didn’t have anything at the top of his mind but he promised to consider it and see what they could come up with.

When I got home I worked on my Christmas cards. It took me a couple of hours but I got them all done. I cut back the list of people I send cards to. I wonder if the people I cut out will miss them? I doubt it! I have to go to Emporia tomorrow so will drop them in the mailbox while I am in town.

After I got the cards done I made sugar cookies. I only made a single batch as we don’t eat as many as we used to. I was grateful I only had to deal with a single batch as I was tired of them by the time I got them rolled out, cut and baked and then frosted. I haven’t tried one yet but they look edible.

I still need to finish cleaning up the kitchen. I needed to sit and take a break for a hot minute before I finished cleaning up. I sure do make a mess when I make something like sugar cookies. I found some chocolate splatters from yesterday that I had missed when I cleaned up yesterday.

I still need to make peppernuts and New Year’s Cookies and then I think my Christmas baking will be done. I may need to make a second batch of fudge and peanut brittle to have enough to take to my brothers but I will see how much is left over after Saturday. I am going to see my Aunt in Wichita next week and I want to take her some treats too.

Phil worked on the addition this afternoon. He got the trim up around the bathroom door. It still needs painted but then I think the only thing left is to finish the shower and to get heat/air back there. We are so close to having it done. It sure is easier to cook with the stuff on the racks. I can find what I need so much easier. I still need to delete some stuff though as some of the shelves are too crowded.

Phil got the new window shades hung in the addition. I really like them and think I will order some just like them for other rooms in the house. The cheap blinds get so dirty and they are hard to clean. Some of the blinds have broken slates and need replaced.

Phil told me about a friend of his who had to spend a couple weeks in the Detention Center. His friend happened to be there the week of Thanksgiving and got to partake in the pizza and cookie party. His friend had told Phil that there was a guy in the Detention Center that had been there for over four years and how excited he was to get pizza. The friend said the pizza really lightened things up for a bit.

The lady that took my bag of outerwear came over this afternoon. I had left a pair of gloves and two keys in the pocket of the coat. Have no idea where the keys go. It was extremely considerate of her to return them. I didn’t recognize the lady – I should have asked her to tell me her name.

Tomorrow early afternoon I am meeting a family that needs to get some end of life plans in place. I have a feeling they have too many assets for me to help them. I have given them my estate attorney’s name and number and am thinking they have already called him. I will see what I can help them with and go from there. When people have larger estates I think they need professional help and refer them out for estate planning. I can help with funeral plans, DPOA, etc.

Friday I have to go back to go back to Emporia to pick up a cake. I need to stop and get a few groceries. I usually make bourbon slush (or as my mother used to call it Hop Skip and Go Naked punch). I forgot to get the ingredients to make it.

Looking forward to Saturday and having all the kids come home for the day. I am almost ready for Christmas!

I ordered a coat rack for the back room today. We will be using the back door to take the dogs for walks and with cold weather upon us it would be handy to leave coats by the back door.

I also ordered a few long sleeve shirts. I cleaned out my closet and realized I needed a few more winter shirts. I have room for them now that I cleaned things out.

It has been a good week and I feel like I have gotten a lot done. Still have several things on my to-do list but am making good progress. It will be good to be in service to a family tomorrow and help them with some end of life plans. That is never an easy thing to do, especially under stress, but hoping it will lightened their load later.

Grateful the sugar cookies are baked and frosted, grateful the gift cards are at the Detention Center, and grateful more progress was made on the addition today.

This has been chocolate dipping day. I used five blocks of dipping chocolate today. First I dipped a whole bag plus about another half of a bag of pretzels. They took forever!

I took a rest and cleaned out my closet. I was brutal in getting rid of things today and have very few clothes left hanging. I set a bag of winter wear on my front porch and made a post on a Facebook group and someone came and hauled it off.

I then made the Ritz crackers that I spread with peanut butter and then I dipped them in the dipping chocolate.

I went to a friend’s house for a Christmas gathering and took some of the fruits of my labors with me. I fixed a plate with fudge, peanut brittle and the Ritz cracker things. Most of the fudge disappeared but I brought home most of the other stuff.

When I got home I made the peanut butter balls and dipped them in chocolate. I am at the point I don’t ever want to dip anything else in chocolate. I’m tired of it. Good to have it all done though. I do need to clean up the kitchen one more time before I can go to bed.

Tomorrow I am delivering the Walmart gift cards to the Detention Center. The Detainees will each be given one to mail to a loved one. It will be good to have that project completed. Kathy had to go to Emporia today so she picked up the last three cards I needed which saved me from making a trip to town today.

I hope to get the sugar cookies made tomorrow. I am only making a single batch as we don’t seem to eat as many as we used to and I don’t want a lot leftover Saturday.

Thursday I am meeting a family and helping them with some end of life planning. Not sure I will be able to help them too much but I will be able to point them in the right direction.

I still need to find time to make some Peppernuts and New Year’s Cookies before Saturday. We shall see when I can find the time to make those.

Friday I need to go to Emporia to pick up a cake. So far I don’t need anything else but I may need some groceries by then.

Saturday is our family Christmas. Looking forward to having all the family here for the day. I still need to finish putting the game together but I think I know what I am doing now for it. I am only making two things for lunch so won’t need to spend a lot of time cooking Saturday morning.

I would like to get my Christmas letters out this week but we shall see if I can get to them. They can wait till next week if needed. I am ready to have Christmas done for the year and it won’t be done until I get the letters out.

One day next week I want to go to Wichita and go visit my Aunt and then go to Costco. I have a list that seems to be growing daily of things I need from Costco. I haven’t been for a bit. Costco and Walmart are about the only stores I go to these days other than an occasional trip to Bluestem.

Felt good to get some things done today. I had been meaning to clean out my closet for several months and I got it done today. My Christmas treat making is well underway and that feels good too. I still have three full days to go before Saturday to finish up the rest of the things.

My schedule is going to open way up starting next week with lots of empty space. I will have a month of that before surgery on January 15. Trying to make sure the house is completely back to where I want it to be and as clean as can be before surgery. I will have six weeks after surgery where I can’t lift much so want to get things done now.

I take great pleasure in getting rid of things and passing them on to others that can use them. I have a bag of books I need to take to the library for the next book sale next time I go to Emporia. The house always feels to me like it can breathe easier when I lightened the amount of things inside it. I know I can too!

Grateful the chocolate dipping day is done, grateful for the gathering of friends today, and grateful my closet is cleaned out.

This has not been the easiest of days. I am surprised I was able to successfully make a batch of fudge. It seems everything I tried to do had a hitch somehow.

The Director of Pioneer Bluffs stopped by this morning and picked up all the Newsletters and leftover supplies. It was good to get them out of the house.

I worked on cleaning my bedroom today. I got the bookcase moved back into place and cleaned and organized. I found the copies of my blog and decided to put them all in 4 inch binders. Some already were but others were in some sort of cheap paper binder that Jim had done. This little project did not go easy. Putting stacks of papers into three holes was a challenge for me today.

I didn’t have enough binders so decided to go to Emporia. I had to get white ones instead of black ones as they were out of black ones. I also got some more storage containers to put the Christmas treats in and leftover containers so the kids can take treats home. I asked the clerk that was checking me out if they sell stamps and I was surprised when she said yes. I got the stamps I needed and that saved me a trip to the post office. I got some more gift cards that I needed for the Detention Center. Unfortunately I only got 13 when I needed 16. Now I get to go back to town tomorrow to get 3 more.

I went to Bluestem to get some nails to secure the new 12 x 12 plastic tiles I got for the dog pen. Two young boys (men) helped me and they found some 4 inch nails that fit perfectly. I also got a puncher to be able to get the nails low enough.

On the way home a car played games with me all the way to Strong City. I attempted to pass them on the first part of the highway out of town. The car sped up and wouldn’t let me in so I slowed down and let him go first. Then he slowed down to 60 mph until the next passing lane. At the passing lane he sped up to 75 all the way through it. Rinse and repeat all the way home. Not sure what his deal was.

When I got home I got all the blogs transferred to the new binders. It was good to get that little project taken care of. I still need to label them but then they will be done. I managed to cut my finger while I was doing this project.

I made a batch of fudge that turned out OK. I thought at first I hadn’t cooked it long enough but it tastes really good so all is well.

I also made the pretzels that you put a chocolate kiss on, melt them a bit and push on a M&M on top of the kiss. They are Tagen’s favorite Christmas treats.

Some days are easy and some days aren’t. I am grateful nothing big happened – just little things that annoyed me.

Tomorrow I hope to do the chocolate dipping treats. It will take most of the day to get them all made due to lack of counter space. I will need to run into town to get three more gift cards as I need to have them at the Center on Wednesday. I will do that little errand between treats.

Kathy laid down the rubber tiles and nailed them in place. The nails I got worked – at least as far as we can tell now. I need to order another couple of boxes of them as 50 didn’t cover much. Kathy laid down a few in front of the back door and in front of the dog pen door. Hopefully they will keep us from slipping on the slope when it is wet or icy.

Tomorrow I have a Christmas party to go to at 4:00. It will be fun to see my friends and share some of the treats I made today.

If I get the chocolate dipping treats made tomorrow I will be in good shape for Saturday and our family Christmas. I will make sugar cookies Wednesday and then possibly make New Year’s Cookies on Friday. I’ll see how my energy holds up.

I still need to finalize the game I will need to have ready for Saturday. I think I decided what I want to do but now need to get the final pieces of it gathered up. I am only making a green bean casserole and Macaroni and Cheese for our lunch on Saturday so that will go fast and easy. Jason is making pig tails and gravy, Michelle is bringing mashed potatoes and Nicole is bringing a salad.

If I get time I will work on my Christmas cards this week too. I got my first card from a friend today. I would like to get them done this week so Christmas really can be done by Saturday.

After Saturday I should have lots of free time and space. I want to go to Wichita one day next week and visit my Aunt and make a stop at Costco. I have a list of things that I need from Costco. I hope to pick a day where they aren’t too crowded but know that is a big ask this time of year.

Grateful that this day of little mishaps is almost over, grateful none of the mishaps were serious, and grateful I got some things done today.

This has been a long day. I woke up at 4:30 and couldn’t go back to sleep so got up around 5:30. There is a lot of day when you get up that early.

I finished the Pioneer Bluffs Newsletter this morning. They are going to get picked up tomorrow morning. My clean living room looks cluttered with all the Newsletter stuff in it.

I made a batch of peanut brittle this afternoon. I think it turned out OK. It is still too hot to break into pieces. I tasted a little bit that fell off when I flipped over the brittle to cool. I will make at least one more batch, if not two before the season is over. I still need to make a couple batches of old fashioned fudge too.

I haven’t gotten any cleaning done today. I may get the bedroom done yet today – we shall see. I really want to get the bookcase moved back where it belongs. I also need to clean out my closet and get rid of clothes that don’t fit.

Either Monday or Tuesday will be chocolate dipping day. I make peanut butter balls, ritz crackers with peanut butter, and I dip pretzels all in dipping chocolate. It will take several hours to get all that stuff made. I will have to do it in shifts as I don’t have enough kitchen counter space to lay it all out to dry. I will make one thing, let them set up, and then rinse and repeat twice.

I still need to make and frost sugar cookies too. I have all week so will have time to get to those too. I may make peppernuts but I need to get a lemon. I will have to go to town early this week to get the last 13 Walmart gift cards I need by Wednesday. I will stop and get a lemon when I do that.

It has been a cloudy, cold day on the prairie today. I sure miss the sunshine when we have a couple days like this. I really need to consider going south for the winter to get some sunshine.

If I can stay awake I plan on watching the Chiefs game tonight. I watched a couple of movies while I was stuffing the Newsletters and that made time go by quickly.

Phil came over this afternoon and put the door to the new bathroom up and painted it. He took down the door that was between the kitchen and the addition. I moved the animals feeding station out to the addition so need to keep that doorway open all the time. I have a little heater that has a thermostat on it back there to keep the room warm for now. The heating and air guys are to come the 17th to add vents to the addition.

It has been nice to have a couple stay-at-home days. I don’t have much on my calendar for this week so will get several more days at home this week. I function better when I spend most of my time at home.

Trying to find some Christmas spirit. I don’t think I ever found it last year. It is not my favorite time of the year. I do enjoy celebrating the Winter Solstice at it reminds me the light is returning. Maybe that is the whole point of Christmas anyways.

Grateful the Newsletter is done, grateful the peanut brittle turned out OK, and grateful for a bit more progress on the back room addition today.

I was surprised I slept last night after sleeping most of the day yesterday. I don’t remember sleeping that much in one day before. I must have needed it.

I got the living room detailed cleaned today. I sure found a lot of dirt. I accidentally unplugged the extension cord the internet router is plugged into. It took so long to reload that I thought I had broken something. I called the Internet company and of course it came back on while I was talking to them.

The Director from Pioneer Bluffs dropped off the Newsletter material for me to finish up the mailing. The group at the work day today got most of it done. I just need to glue the stuffed envelopes shut and finish stuffing and glueing a few of them. I am already halfway done. I will finish the rest of them tomorrow. They are going to be picked up Monday morning. I am grateful I got them early so they can be done my Monday morning. That will give me all day Monday and Tuesday to make treats.

Tomorrow I will finish up the Newsletter and hopefully get another room detailed cleaned. I still need to get the book case in my bedroom turned around and put back into place. To do that I have to unload it. It needs a good cleaning so I will do that too.

I ordered some plastic tile things for the dog pen. There is too much gravel in the pen and the dogs need a space to lay without being on gravel. They will work but I need to find some way of securing them in to the ground. They have holes in the four corners of them for that purpose. I need to research what type of thingy would work the best and get some ordered.

Next week I don’t have anything on my calendar except family day on Saturday. I have to figure out a game for our family Christmas on Saturday and then go to town to get what I need to make that happen. I have to pick up Ellexia’s birthday cake on Friday so will get things then if I don’t make it to town before that.

Felt good to get one room of the house clean. I was thinking today about the country house and realized how much easier it is to clean this small house. It would have taken me two weeks to get every room in the county house detailed cleaned. Life sure is easier in the small house.

I still need to get the insurance pictures finished up and sent off to the agent that is working on the claim. I am still tempted to have them send someone here instead. I don’t like doing their work for them.

Hard to believe that our family Christmas is a week from today. I’m grateful we are doing it early and getting it out of the way. Christmas is not my favorite season and after next Saturday I can pretend it is over for the year. I don’t decorate anymore so won’t have to get that stuff out and then put it all away again.

Time is so weird for me. I struggle to stay “in time” these days. It just doesn’t hold much meaning for me any more. I work hard staying present to what is and letting the rest of it go. I have trouble knowing if something that happened in the past happened a week ago, a month ago, a year ago or when it happened.

Still avoiding the news for the most part. I do read the headlines and follow a couple of people that recap what is going on. I do much better mentally if I don’t spend a lot of time understanding what is happening. It feels like a different reality anymore.

Grateful one room is detailed cleaned, grateful the Newsletter is halfway done, and grateful for all the sleep I got yesterday.

I have slept most of the day. Not sure what is up with that but as sleep deprived as I am I take sleep whenever it finds me. Not sure if I will be able to sleep tonight but we shall see.

I woke up early this morning and worked on moving things to the back room for a bit. I never felt like I woke up and mid morning took a nap. I ended up sleeping for five hours.

Woke up and my tummy felt like it had a knot in it. The toast I had for breakfast was not going down well. I was up for about an hour and went back to bed and slept for another five hours.

I got a phone call that woke me up. I am still not hungry although the knot that was in my tummy seems to have let loose. Decided to get up and blog and I will probably take a bath and go back to bed.

I haven’t crashed and burned like this for a long time. I am grateful I had nothing I had to do today and could gift myself the time to sleep as that is what my body needed today.

Grateful for an abundance of sleep today, grateful to practice good self-care and allow myself to sleep all day, and grateful for family and the love we share.

I went to the eye specialist in Topeka today. We had a nice visit as always. My eyes checked out good. No changes that he can see. My cataracts are the same as they were a year ago. I can finally almost see OK again now that the dilation effect is wearing off.

I moved the cat box and dog feed station to the new addition today. The laundry room is so much bigger and cleaner without those in it. It is so nice to sit in the living room and not feel boxed in. I can breathe again! I still have the front porch to move but it may wait until the kids come the 13th. There are some heavy totes that they will be able to move without getting short of breath. I don’t even remember what is in most of them. Hoping I can get rid of some of the things and not have to store them.

I may have a newsletter for Pioneer Bluffs to work on next week. Things are moving quicker than they anticipated and it may be done tomorrow. They have a work day Saturday and they may get it done then. That would be nice for me. I have lots of treats to make and it would free up two more days to get them done.

Tomorrow I hope to do some deep house cleaning. I need to remove everything off a book case in my bedroom and get the book case relocated back to where it belongs. I need to move all the furniture in the living room and clean the floors good underneath them. It was too crowded to do that before.

My desk seems to be piled high again and I need to get through it and find homes for all the papers that are piled on it. I have a few Christmas gifts that I need to wrap and some envelopes to prepare for the 13th. I got a first draft of my Christmas letter written so need to proof it and then get my cards out. I have cut the number of cards down this year. Not sure anyone will miss my card. I do like to send them to family I have that are scattered here there and everywhere. Cards are almost a thing of the past though. Not too many people still send them.

My prolapse surgery is January 15 so need to give some thought about what I need to do to help recovery go well. I won’t be able to lift over five pounds and no driving for several weeks. It is going to be done by robot so thinking the healing will be easier than if they had to make a big incision. I remember my hysterectomy was done that way and it was fairly easy to recover from. I had to keep reminding myself I couldn’t lift things.

Not sure what I am going to do about tax season this year. The training happens the end of January and I won’t be able to drive to go to town for it. Kathy could drive me in I guess if my brain is up to the task. That is a lot to ask of her though as most of the training is done in the evenings and she usually goes to bed early. I would hate to skip doing taxes this year as they are short on volunteers but I won’t be back to full capacity until the first of March. The season will be halfway done by then.

Wondering if we should do pizza and cookies again for the Detention Center the week of Christmas. We are doing the gift card project the middle of December so the gift cards can reach their recipients by Christmas. The Thanksgiving feast was well received and we have funds. I suggested it to the Captain today and he is going to get back to me and let me know. I know it creates extra work for some of the staff to handle the pizzas but I also know how well it went over. If we don’t do it, I will have to come up with something we can do in January. It is hard to come up with special events due to the limitations we have to follow.

Still wondering where this project will go in 2026. They have enough cards and stamps to get them through the first six months at least of 2026. They don’t seem to need more recreational equipment right now. After the first of the year I will have some deeper conversations about the transportation issue and see how we can be in service to them with that. I’m sure other things will come up just as they did in 2025. I sure wouldn’t have predicted in July when I started this project that we would be able to do what we did in 2025.

Sitting in a good head space tonight. I was able to stay above neutral all day. I listened to a person that is a clairvoyant give her ideas on where this country is headed. It gave me a lot of peace of mind to listen to what she is predicting. Love will win! I sure do better when I tune out the news and only read highlights and stay out of worry. Worrying doesn’t fix anything and only causes me to drop below neutral.

Grateful for a good report from the eye specialist, grateful the cat box and dog feeding station got moved out of the laundry room, and grateful I may get out of doing the Newsletter this time.

This has been moving day. The addition is completed enough that I could move the racks that have been in the living room into the addition.

Phil came over this afternoon and moved the freezer and refrigerator to the addition. I have to remove everything from a book case that is in the bedroom so I can move it back to where it belongs. I sold the bike that used to be in a spot in the dining room where the refrigerator had been moved to temporarily. It will be nice to have a spot of empty space in the dining room.

I have one rack completely moved and everything loaded on to. I am in the process of reloading the second rack. The front porch stuff is going to have to wait for a warmer day. The new rack is going to work nicely to store food items on. It will declutter my little pantry cabinet and I should be able to find what I need easier.

The living room feels like it is twice a big now with the racks gone. It gives me breathing space again. Or at least it will when I get the rest of the stuff moved out and put on the second rack. Once I get everything moved out of the dining room and living room I will need to deep clean. It has been too cluttered to clean lately and I am seeing lots of dirt that built up while everything was displaced.

I have been sleepy tired all day. I woke up at 4:30 and couldn’t go back to sleep. I took a short nap this morning but feel like I need to go to bed now. Too early for that as I would wake up too early if I went to bed now. I will have to get up and get moving again and finish filling the rack and hopefully that will keep me awake until bedtime.

I ordered some blinds for the two windows and the door in the addition. They will be in sometime next week.

I called the heating and air guy. I have a date of December 17 for them to come but I don’t think I will hold my breath that they will be here then. Getting them here has turned into a major pain. Trusting it won’t get cold enough to freeze the water lines before they get heat back there.

The attorney sent me papers to DocuSign this afternoon for the nonprofit status for Love in Action. She had said it might be a week before she could get them to me so I was surprised they came today. I need two other people to sign them and then they will be filed with the state. I should have nonprofit status by the end of the year.

I went to the Grand for lunch today. I ran into the Captain and Lieutenant of the Detention Center. They told me how excited the Detainees were to get pizza and a cookie. I would like to do something special Christmas week for them but not sure what we will come up with to do. Pizza was pretty expensive for 150 plus people. I have enough to cover it again but that would almost deplete my funds.

Tomorrow I have to go to Topeka for an eye doctor appointment. He always dilates my eyes which sometimes can cause me to have a migraine. Sometimes it can take up to two hours at an appointment as he sees lots of people in one day.

No plans for the weekend. I have a couple of things I might go to but I never know if I can make myself go until the last minute. Early next week I may have a Pioneer Bluffs Newsletter to work on. I told them I could help Monday and Tuesday but the rest of the week I need to be free to finish doing my Christmas baking. We are having our family Christmas on the 13th and I need to be done with it all by then.

Not sure why I am so tired today. My rash from the shingles is much better today and my sore throat is gone. Nicole has had the same sore throat and a bit of congestion this past week too. We decided it was from the smog in India and it is our bodies way of getting rid of it. I’m grateful I am feeling better today and not going down for the count.

I’m so excited to get my house back to its more normal state. I enjoy seeing some empty space in it again. I’m so glad I decided to do the addition and make the space easier to work in. It stresses me out when I can’t find something immediately and when you don’t have enough space to put things, it was happening all too often. Need to make some hard decisions and get rid of more things so I have even more empty space.

Sitting in a good head space tonight. I’m getting excited that all the kids are coming home for Christmas on the 13th. That is the only part of Christmas I enjoy. It will be nice to get it all over with early and then I can pretend Christmas is over this year.

Grateful it is moving into the addition day, grateful for what I have already gotten moved, and grateful the rest will be done soon.

This morning Kathy helped me put together a shelving unit. I get ridiculously proud of myself when I figure something like that out. The directions were poorly written but we got it done!

Phil is here working on tiling the bathroom shower. He said the door to the bathroom is due in tomorrow. He is all but done with the addition. He told me I could move all the racks to the new room. I will start working on that when he is done for the day. It will be so good to get the racks out of the living room and off the front porch. I am especially looking forward to moving the cat box and the dog feeding station to the back room and get them out of the laundry room.

I sent the paperwork for the state non profit status back to the attorney with my final approval and notes. I am hoping that the process will be completed sometime this month. Not sure how long it takes the state to approve it. Once I get the ID number I can get a bank account opened in the name of Love in Action and get a separate VENMO account so accounting will be much easier.

Still not sure where this project will go in 2026. I trust it will continue to grow and the non profit status will have been worth doing. It will be fun to see where it goes next year.

I went to Emporia around noon and got the ingredients to make all my Christmas treats. I met Jason for lunch which made the trip to town extra special. Stopped at two different banks to get some cash. I was going to stop at the post office and get some stamps to mail my Christmas letters but there was no parking which probably meant a line. I decided I would take care of getting stamps in Cottonwood Falls where there is usually no lines.

Kathy wasn’t feeling well today so I stopped at CVS and picked up a couple of prescriptions that were ready for her.

The hyacinths that I planted are growing and most have a little green showing. I trust I can keep them alive and they will bloom. They are my favorite spring flower and it will be delightful to have them in the middle of winter if they bloom.

While I was at Walmart today I got several pairs of gloves and a couple of hats. Not sure what happens to my supply of gloves and hats but it sure seems like they disappear during the winter. I also got another 20 gift cards for the Detention Center Christmas project. I only need 16 more and I will have all 148 of them in house. I can only buy 20 at a time so it has taken several trips to get them all.

It sure warmed up today. There is still a little snow remaining in places that were shaded and not in the sun. I had to take my coat off at Walmart as I got too hot. I would not complain if that is all the snow we get this year – a girl can dream – right?

Tomorrow I will finish up moving stuff to the new addition. I would like to get a Christmas treat or two made. I have until the 13th to get them all done and I can’t wait to do them all next week. I have about ten different ones to make. One day will be chocolate day when I dip several different treats in melting chocolate. I need a sunny day to make the fudge and peanut brittle.

Feels like a lot got done today. I am so excited that the addition is almost completed. It will be so nice to have my living room back. One day soon Phil will be able to move the freezer and refrigerator back to the addition and clear up that space too. If I can get all that done and the paperwork for the not for profit status completed by year end I will be a happy camper. I dislike pending projects and it feels like both of these have taken a bit to complete.

Sitting in a good head space tonight. Productive days help me maintain my balance. Sunny days help too! I think I have finally recovered from the jet lag of my trip and am back to my normal not so normal sleeping schedule. I am looking forward to all the kids coming home on the 13th for our family Christmas.

Grateful to get the shelving unit put together relatively easily with Kathy’s help, grateful to have lunch with Jason, and grateful I can move the racks out of the living room.

It has been a quiet day at home. We got a dusting of snow this afternoon but not as much as expected. I hear north of us got a heavier covering.

I had a Zoom call with a lady from KC that is an Immigration Advocate. We had an interesting conversation. She wanted to hear about Love in Action and what we are doing. I think her hope is that she can get the Center to drop the ICE contract. Not sure how she is going to attempt that or if she is going to proceed. I shared with her I think the real solution needs to come from the Federal level with a change in policy that stops the rounding up of the Detainees to start with.

They do have a transportation unit and she is going to coordinate a call with them and me. I need to know how they handle the insurance and liability risks. That will be very helpful if that can happen.

Took a nap this afternoon. I slept some last night but needed a bit more sleep. For some reason my legs have been restless all day which is unusual for me. Usually they only kick in at night time.

I forgot to call the heat and air guy. I will try to remember to call them tomorrow. I really would like them to get this done so the room will be heated this winter. I want to store some food items out there and I don’t want them to freeze.

No plans for the next two days. I have to go to Topeka Thursday for an eye doctor appointment. I do need to go to the grocery store to get things to make Christmas treats. If the roads are clear tomorrow I may go in then. I haven’t been out of the house for almost a week so maybe it is time for me to venture out.

I still need to review the paperwork for the not for profit status. I hope to get that done tomorrow and send a note to the attorney handling it to proceed and file. Not sure how long this process will take but hoping to have it all done by the end of the year.

The dogs came in to warm up for a bit. We brought them in last night but they wanted back outside. I brought Ellie the cat in for a bit this afternoon but she and Louis have forgotten how to be friends. I have a feeling all three are going to get put back outside for the night.

For some reason the empty space is making me restless this evening. Maybe because I have been home for a long stretch. I don’t have much on my calendar and have too much empty space. I’m sure it will fill up and all will be well but right now it feels scary.

Grateful we didn’t get a lot of snow, grateful for the contact I made today, and grateful that this too shall pass. All is well, right here, right now, all is well.

Another quiet day at home. I am still in my pajamas as I had no where to go today and wasn’t expecting anyone over.

Phil worked on putting up trim today. He even got most of it painted in the main storage room. It is almost to the point of being able to move the racks to the back room. He still has a few more pieces to put up and paint and then finish the bathroom. The finish line got moved closer today.

I started some hyacinths bulbs in little jars. I ordered some pots and potting soil and got those transferred today. I made a big mess but it was dry dirt so it cleaned up easily. I sure hope they grow and bloom. I want to give them as Christmas presents. Fingers crossed I did it right.

I balanced the books for Love in Action today. I try to do that monthly so I can keep track of where we are at. Even after the Thanksgiving and Christmas projects are paid for, we have money to carry over into next year. I am still in shock that strangers send money to me to use for this project.

I got my property tax statement Saturday. I also got one for the rental house I just sold. I will call Monday and make sure the title got transferred and this was a crossing wires in the night type of thing. It sure will be easier to pay property taxes this year as I only have to pay for one house instead of four.

Tomorrow someone set up a call with me to talk about the project I am doing at the Detention Center. I’m not sure what information they want from me but am happy to share what I am doing. Have a feeling it isn’t what they think it is but we shall see.

We are to get our first taste of winter weather overnight with up to three inches of snow expected. I hope the old wife’s tale is true that says what ever day of the month it is that is how many snows you will get this year. Since tomorrow is the first, maybe it will be the one and only snow we get this year.

I need to call the heating and air guys and find out when they are coming. They were hoping to come on our rainy day last week but didn’t make it. They had told me they would call if they couldn’t come and tell me when they would come. I didn’t hear from them so need to become the greasy wheel and make some noise.

I had to order a new electric blanket as my old one is not heating. I think I remember now that at the end of winter last year it wasn’t heating well. I sure love to crawl into a warm, heated bed on these cold nights. I usually end up turning it off during the night but I love a preheated bed to crawl into.

I have had a sore throat and a bit of a cough today. Sure hope I am not coming down with something. The shingles are finally almost cleared up and I slept last night at the right time. I am ready to be back on normal sleep schedule and feeling good again. I don’t want a cold to knock me out again.

I have my grocery list made for the items I need to make my Christmas treats. Don’t think I will make it to town tomorrow if we get the predicted snow. I will wait a couple of days for better road conditions. I really dislike driving on snow and icy roads. I won’t mind another stay at home day at all.

Hope to work on my Christmas cards this week. I have to be in the right mood to write the letter I send. I have been reading through my blog for the year to find things I want to mention in my letter. Not finding too much yet. The three big things this year have been the death of my oldest brother, Kathy being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and the Love in Action project.

I am appreciating all the empty space I have on my calendar for this week and next. It will give me lots of time to get the Christmas treats made. I don’t rush well anymore and it seems to take me longer to do things than it used to.

It has been a good day and I have been able to stay above neutral. Got a few things done which always makes me feel better. Starting to think about next year and what word I want to choose to focus me. It will be interesting to see where the Love in Action project goes next year. I can’t even guess what twist and turns that will take. I am doing my best to go along for the ride and not have any expectations of where it might go.

Grateful to get the books balanced for Love in Action, grateful we are carrying over funds into 2026, and grateful the hyacinths are planted in pots.

I haven’t slept since I woke up at 11:00 last night. I laid down for a nap this afternoon but didn’t fall asleep. Maybe I will be able to stay awake until 8:00 or so and then sleep all night. This sleep thing is wearing me out.

I went up to the Old School Christmas thing around noon. I found four boxes of Christmas cards for $0.25 a box. I also got some Christmas gift bags for $0.25 each. they even had some gift tags for $0.25. Got a whole bag of things and only paid $5.00 for all. What a bargain! I bid on one auction item but haven’t heard if I won or not. They didn’t have a very big turnout at least while I was there. Maybe it picked up later this afternoon.

We got rain this morning but so far no snow. The wind is a blowing this afternoon. Hope it doesn’t blow the snow our way. It sure feels colder than it is with the strong wind.

The potting soil and pots I ordered came in so I will get the hyacinths planted soon. Not sure if they will bloom by Christmas time or not but hoping will shortly thereafter.

Need to work on my Christmas letter now that I have some cards. I looked over my calendar for 2025 and I didn’t see much on it. I will finish rereading my blog and see if anything worth noting happened during the year. Not sure where time goes but it sure goes fast these days, even when I don’t do anything.

The roof overhang on the room addition worked well today as the dogs were able to lay outside and not get wet while it was raining. I appreciate that Phil did that for the dogs.

No plans for tomorrow. I think I will stay home yet another day and work on things around here. It has been nice to take a couple days and stay home and be quiet.

I need to get some things ready for our family Christmas as it is in two weeks from today. I made a list of things I need to get from the grocery store so I can start making treats. I don’t buy too many gifts anymore. I ordered the things Ellexia wanted so that is already taken care of. Just need to get them wrapped. Tagen wants a gift certificate or cash. I do need to come up with a game for everyone to play. I got some of the prizes for it already so just need to decide what game to put together.

Next week will be fairly quiet. I have a Zoom call on Monday and then on Thursday I have to go to Topeka for an eye doctor appointment. Good to have lots of free time on my calendar.

I can’t believe it is going to be December Monday. My goodness this year went by quickly. Wonder what next year will bring? I have a feeling things are going to come to a head over the next month or two and start changing course.

Feeling a bit tired this afternoon but better than I have been. The shingles are almost healed already. Sure thinking the vaccine helped make this a fairly mild case. I have been able to stay above neutral and that helps me feel better too. I haven’t spent too much time reading the news since I have been home. So much chaos and fear mongering that I do best when I don’t spend much time reading the news.

Grateful for another quiet day at home, grateful we didn’t get any snow, and grateful for the sleep I will get tonight.

This has been a rest and recovery day. I am doing a couple loads of laundry but other than that nothing.

I laid down to take a nap around 2:30 and just woke up at 11:00. Best stretch of sleep I have had since I got home from India and Nepal. Probably won’t sleep again tonight but it was worth it to get sleep.

Loaned my knee scooter out again. I think this is at least the 8th person that has gotten use out of this scooter. It has gotten lots of use over the years. Grateful I kept it and it is finding value to others.

Tomorrow (or it it still today) I need to do some paperwork and get a few things taken care of. Maybe I will do them tonight as I won’t be able to sleep. I need to review the paperwork for the not for profit status for Love in Action and get it back to the attorney to complete. I also need to reconcile my accounting records. A lady let me know her check hadn’t cleared which explains why I was off $10 and I couldn’t figure out what happened. I must have thrown away her check without depositing it. I had come up with a system to prevent that after her check disappeared. Grateful she let me know about it and I solved my $10 discrepancy.

I also need to send some pictures of Kathy’s car to the insurance company so that claim can get finalized. I couldn’t figure out the easy way to do it so they sent me a second way. If this doesn’t work they will send an adjuster to come handle it. Still not sure why they need pictures of the inside of the car when the outside door was what was damaged.

I have some way overdue housecleaning that needs done. I should have gotten to it before Thanksgiving but I didn’t. It is starting to bug me and I need to get it done. Not sure I can do it while Kathy is sleeping but I want to get to it in the morning after she wakes up.

Phil got the dog pen moved back behind the house today. He even fixed the dog house that had some repairs that needed done to it. It will be nice to have the dogs closer to the house again and easier to get to if the weather gets bad. I need to get a concrete pad poured that leads from the new back door to the opening of the dog pen. Don’t think that can happen before winter though. The guy that did my sidewalks didn’t respond to my text so thinking he has left the country. Maybe he does every winter and will get back to me next spring.

I have three sympathy cards that I need to write and send out. Hard time of the year to lose a loved one – but then again anytime is a hard time to say goodbye. I think I have some on hand, if not I will have to go to Dollar General and get some.

Made a big bowl of ham salad today with the leftover ham from Thanksgiving. It makes a good snack and I will enjoy eating on it for the next couple of days.

No plans to leave the house this weekend. I have plenty of things that need done here to keep me busy.

Next week looks fairly open. I have to go to Topeka Thursday for an eye doctor appointment. Trying to think if I have anything I need for Christmas presents while I am there. I don’t give many presents anymore so doubt that I come up with anything. I do need to get the stuff to make our families favorite Christmas treats but I can do that in Emporia.

Grateful for some quiet time ahead, grateful for sleep at last even if it didn’t come at the right time of day, and grateful to figure out why I wasn’t balancing my Love in Action books.