I am embarking on a new journey and decided to blog again to capture my journey. I am in training to become a Certified Elder Doula, a Certified Death Doula and Elder Care Consultant as well as a Certified Forgiveness Course Instructor. All of them are under the same umbrella of helping people plan how they want to live and die.
Death is a human experience we will all go through at some time or other. It can be a beautiful thing if our fear around it can be released and we do our work before the time comes. My training will allow me to help people figure out what kind of quality of life they want should they become ill and what they want or don’t want to happen to them when the time comes.
It is such a gift to our family members to express our thoughts and wishes ahead of time before the family is in a crisis mode dealing with the imminent death of a loved one.
I have been looking for something new to come into my life for some time. I have a desire to give back to my community and needed to find a way to do that. As a community at large, we don’t deal well with death. We don’t talk about it, we rarely plan for it, and often we don’t know what to say or do when it happens. It is almost like we are surprised every time someone dies. Sure, unexpected and untimely deaths happen, but I am talking about death that follows an illness or death of an older loved one. There can be a real gift to all involved when death happens under Hospice or another type of umbrella that allows the death to be a human experience and not a medical crisis.
As a nation it feels like there is a lot of unresolved grief happening. Our institutions seem to be falling apart – there is a death happening before our eyes. It represents the collective energy that we as a country have about death. Ignore it and it might not happen! Guess what? It does happen and will happen to each of us at some time or other. Death is the one human experience that we can not escape from. We might as well prepare for it and be ready!
My work and training as an energy practitioner seems to fit right in with this new training that I am doing. At the end of our life, our physical body begins to diminish, and our spiritual body of energy begins to grow. When one can remove the fear from the dying process, it can become a beautiful thing – for both the person making their transition and the family left behind.
I am looking for a few brave souls that will allow me to talk with them about death and about what decisions they want their family to make for them when that time comes. I have to do some case plans for my class. If you are interested, hit me up and let’s talk.
I’m not sure yet how and what my practice will look like as I complete my training. It is going to take me about two months to finish all the training. If you know of a need or a way that I can put this in service to the community please share with me. I’m open to all ideas at this point. At some point in my training we write a business plan and I will need some suggestions and help with that.
I welcome all ideas and thoughts from all religious and non-religious souls. Some of us have strong beliefs and preferences for what may happen. I find it fascinating to hear from others what their beliefs are about what happens when a person dies. I’m open to all possibilities and beliefs.
Today my lessons were on Advanced Directives and naming a Medical Power of Attorney. The instructor stressed the need to name someone that will be able and willing to honor your wishes and not impose their own desires. She also stressed how important it is to ask that person to do that honor for you and that it not be a surprise to them. You really need to have a conversation with them so they know what your wishes are so they can carry them out for you. When I finish my training I will be able to help people with those decisions and help facilitate discussion with your family members so all know your wishes. What a gift that will be for your family members to know what you would want.
I will also be learning about all the options after death and how to help someone plan their own burial, cremation, home care or funeral home, green burial or casket, or what ever your choice is. You can even preplan what music, if any, is used, funeral or no funeral, wake or no wake. You have lots of choices if you plan ahead. You can even write your own obituary – or not!
Last week my lessons were on the three stages of dying and how to help a family through them. The class talked about deaths that happen through a hospice type setting. Knowing what is going to happen throughout the dying process helps keep the fear at bay for all involved.
Not sure how often I will be blogging but decided to capture this new journey for myself. It will be interesting to me to see if my views of dying change. Writing helps me process what I am learning and the questions, doubts and Ah Ha moments I have during classes. You are welcome to come along with me on this new journey. Maybe we can learn together.
Learning about dying teaches me to appreciate, with even more gratitude, each day I can live life to the fullest in a healthy way. One never knows when my time will be up and I need to continue doing my inner work so when my time comes there are no words left unspoken, no deeds left undone, and no regrets about the choices I have made.